Misfits, Dad's Army Types et al...
Discussion
Top, top thread OP
It has even got me thinking what I can put back into the community: I haven't got a 4x4 or a need to throw my weight around or abuse my non existent authority, but I do have a 1.6 fwd petrol estate car with a roof rack and some bungee cords. With that in mind, do you think offering to transport peoples flat pack furniture home from B&Q/IKEA is a noble cause? Obviously I wouldn't turn out on Christmas eve or if the weathers bad or if I'm pissed, but if I met a neighbor who needed assistance and they offered to pay and I was in B&Q anyway, then hell yes I'll step up to the plate.
It has even got me thinking what I can put back into the community: I haven't got a 4x4 or a need to throw my weight around or abuse my non existent authority, but I do have a 1.6 fwd petrol estate car with a roof rack and some bungee cords. With that in mind, do you think offering to transport peoples flat pack furniture home from B&Q/IKEA is a noble cause? Obviously I wouldn't turn out on Christmas eve or if the weathers bad or if I'm pissed, but if I met a neighbor who needed assistance and they offered to pay and I was in B&Q anyway, then hell yes I'll step up to the plate.
Car clubs attract these types. I am not a joiner by nature. I was in the Cubs for a week when I was 8 and that was run by a tosser. I think that set me on the path of not joining.
I was browsing one car clubs site once when I found a page entitled something like: "How to enjoy your day out with us."
I'll f
kin well decide how I'll enjoy my day out with or without you. Thank you.
It was clear that there was a rank structure based around a leader (and his wife) and a trusted lieutenant (and wife).
The rules for this allegedly enjoyable day out were that you mustered at some shop car park or motorway service at NO LATER than X o' Clock.
The leader would lead at all times, with the Lieutenant at the back of the convoy. All participants were expected to have a walkie talkie (approved make and model no doubt.) No doubt also there was a strict comms protocol.
The day out involved the convoy moving from one alleged point of interest to another.
The page was littered with comments similar to:
At 12.30 we will stop at theshill Peak cafe for brief refreshment. For those of you who insist on breaking with the group for lunch you will find the Badger and Cock approximately 4 miles down the B6478 in the village of Clunge. PLEASE MAKE SURE all members are back at the shill Peak car park by NO LATER than 13.00. We will not wait for you and it will be your responsibility to meet us at the Aldi car park at Suckwilly-on-Flange by 1800.
Then there was the evening "entertainment" at some pub or other where you had to choose your food sixteen months in advance and send the money to some treasurer.
How on the face of the weeping earth is that fun? A day out driving in a line of cars between pre-determined destinations to a strict timetable while being bossed round by a self-appointed command team.
I was tempted to go, and take my socially unacceptable when drunk pal along for the sport.
I didn't because life's too short.
I was browsing one car clubs site once when I found a page entitled something like: "How to enjoy your day out with us."
I'll f
kin well decide how I'll enjoy my day out with or without you. Thank you.It was clear that there was a rank structure based around a leader (and his wife) and a trusted lieutenant (and wife).
The rules for this allegedly enjoyable day out were that you mustered at some shop car park or motorway service at NO LATER than X o' Clock.
The leader would lead at all times, with the Lieutenant at the back of the convoy. All participants were expected to have a walkie talkie (approved make and model no doubt.) No doubt also there was a strict comms protocol.
The day out involved the convoy moving from one alleged point of interest to another.
The page was littered with comments similar to:
At 12.30 we will stop at the
shill Peak cafe for brief refreshment. For those of you who insist on breaking with the group for lunch you will find the Badger and Cock approximately 4 miles down the B6478 in the village of Clunge. PLEASE MAKE SURE all members are back at the shill Peak car park by NO LATER than 13.00. We will not wait for you and it will be your responsibility to meet us at the Aldi car park at Suckwilly-on-Flange by 1800.Then there was the evening "entertainment" at some pub or other where you had to choose your food sixteen months in advance and send the money to some treasurer.
How on the face of the weeping earth is that fun? A day out driving in a line of cars between pre-determined destinations to a strict timetable while being bossed round by a self-appointed command team.
I was tempted to go, and take my socially unacceptable when drunk pal along for the sport.
I didn't because life's too short.
Edited by wildcat45 on Friday 13th May 13:55
austinsmirk said:
this is the thread that keeps on giving.
we once went to a local stately home to visit its wildlife park. at the same time, there turned out to be a steam traction and vintage vehicle/truck day.
(Now there's a set of characters) Obviously I had to have a wander round: lo and behold there was an arena event where 3 or 4 of these WALT types with their 4 x 4 recovery vehicles (discovery, landcruiser etc) had an organised tug off with a traction engine.
cue, loads of winching, shackles, chain where they link 4 of them together to drag a traction engine backwards.
its was absolute comedy gold: hi viz, radio squawking fat men. all the vehicles covered in every sticker imaginable so you knew they were the "5th" recovery service.
So......we once went to a local stately home to visit its wildlife park. at the same time, there turned out to be a steam traction and vintage vehicle/truck day.
(Now there's a set of characters) Obviously I had to have a wander round: lo and behold there was an arena event where 3 or 4 of these WALT types with their 4 x 4 recovery vehicles (discovery, landcruiser etc) had an organised tug off with a traction engine.
cue, loads of winching, shackles, chain where they link 4 of them together to drag a traction engine backwards.
its was absolute comedy gold: hi viz, radio squawking fat men. all the vehicles covered in every sticker imaginable so you knew they were the "5th" recovery service.
Who won
nicanary said:
. Thanks for being so tolerant when the thread drifted heavily towards p*ss-taking of a certain group.FYI, a word to the wise. Your name won't be in the dossier. I can see we are like minded people. A cut above those other so-called motoring enthusiasts.
back to traction engine v walts.
they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
austinsmirk said:
back to traction engine v walts.
they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
SO, having denoucned the 4x4 response community, youve now turned to insulting every single person who is involved in the preservation of our industrial and motoring heritage for future generations? they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
wildcat45 said:
I have screen grabbed every page for inclusion in a dossier that I will present to Haymarket when I go - uninvited - to their AGM where I will repeatedly interrupt the delivery of the annual report with irrelevant questions and unfounded accusations.
Buy some shares and get invited? You might actually get past the door then.ChemicalChaos said:
SO, having denoucned the 4x4 response community, youve now turned to insulting every single person who is involved in the preservation of our industrial and motoring heritage for future generations?
Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
Are you reading this thread with just the one eye open, or the more conventional two?Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
Edited by limpsfield on Friday 13th May 14:30
Crossflow Kid said:
First rule of rescue: try not end up needing rescuing yourself.....
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4utwPM-2oeI
... or use a kinetic rope for towing.https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4utwPM-2oeI
ChemicalChaos said:
SO, having denoucned the 4x4 response community, youve now turned to insulting every single person who is involved in the preservation of our industrial and motoring heritage for future generations?
Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
I think your posts on this thread are confirming the majority of readers views, keep up the good work Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
.Now as you all look up to me and as I obviously have far too much time on my hands this Friday, I thought I would make the next series of posts the definitive guide to how you the ordinary hum drum non-off roading man in the street can turn yourself into a super human Angel Responder.
WARNING! Blah blah blah, do NOT attempt this unless blah blah blah trained professional blah blah blah.you don't have a clue but I do.
So.
You need the ultimate 4 X 4 X Far. Ideally a knackered Land Rover Discovery 2. I can't afford one - and I guess neither can you - so well just make do with this pile of Chinese crap in the shape of a 2016 Discovery Sport. (It's just a Ford Mondeo under the skin. Not many people know that. Inside knowledge see.)
More follows.
WARNING! Blah blah blah, do NOT attempt this unless blah blah blah trained professional blah blah blah.you don't have a clue but I do.
So.
You need the ultimate 4 X 4 X Far. Ideally a knackered Land Rover Discovery 2. I can't afford one - and I guess neither can you - so well just make do with this pile of Chinese crap in the shape of a 2016 Discovery Sport. (It's just a Ford Mondeo under the skin. Not many people know that. Inside knowledge see.)
More follows.
Edited by wildcat45 on Friday 13th May 15:54
Now to comms and that all important badge of authority.
Note the walkie talkie on the central console. Above it a US Navy hat - given to me by the captain of a warship in thanks after I used the Disco to tow his 9,000 tonne cruiser off some rocks. This IS possible it DID happen. Note too that it essential to have cables and wires hanging from some sort of device in the roof.
Note the walkie talkie on the central console. Above it a US Navy hat - given to me by the captain of a warship in thanks after I used the Disco to tow his 9,000 tonne cruiser off some rocks. This IS possible it DID happen. Note too that it essential to have cables and wires hanging from some sort of device in the roof.
ChemicalChaos said:
austinsmirk said:
back to traction engine v walts.
they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
SO, having denoucned the 4x4 response community, youve now turned to insulting every single person who is involved in the preservation of our industrial and motoring heritage for future generations? they did in fairness drag it. but it wasn't trying to drag them, it was just a dead weight.
but honestly a vintage truck/bus and steam rally really attracts people who are likely to be on some sort of register or about to be pounced on by operation yewtree.
although secretly stream traction engines and lorries seem quite cool ! I like the old technology.
oh and there was a static display of minature engines. FFS.
Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
Ok so the goings going to get tough. You MUST HAVE life saving gear like this. A Swiss Army Knife and a mountaineering thingy.
Note they say a Leatherman is the ultimate tool. But we all know, that us. Right?
Next up, penetrating fluid. (Can be used as Napalm or "Liquid sunshine" in a can in case the balloon really goes up and the army calls on your services.)
Note they say a Leatherman is the ultimate tool. But we all know, that us. Right?
Next up, penetrating fluid. (Can be used as Napalm or "Liquid sunshine" in a can in case the balloon really goes up and the army calls on your services.)
ChemicalChaos said:
SO, having denoucned the 4x4 response community, youve now turned to insulting every single person who is involved in the preservation of our industrial and motoring heritage for future generations?
Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
Kennel Club, bästards the lot of 'em.Any other groups you'd like to smear and slander whilst you are at it? You really are a pathetic berk.
UKIP, giving being British a bad name
Morris Minors, no, your car is not interesting
BBC, not making their iplayer work outside the UK
Health and Safety, bunch of Nazis
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