Misfits, Dad's Army Types et al...

Misfits, Dad's Army Types et al...

Author
Discussion

viscountdallara

2,354 posts

93 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
EnglishTony said:
Are they allowed to set fire to Jersey?
Nah !!
Donkeys can't light matches wink









ChemicalChaos

8,974 posts

108 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
nicanary said:
Crossflow Kid said:
Don't tell 'em your name Pike!

If you want a real laugh take a look at the numerous "4x4 Response" groups that have sprung up in recent years, apparently to assist the emergency services in times of need by providing 4x4 transport, or maybe it's to turn up and tell senior fire officers of thirty years standing that their disaster plan is all wrong.
The key thing however, is to offer up a battered low-spec Land Rover Discovery, weigh it down with ten tonnes of pointless crap like shovels, ropes and stuff, add as many flashing yellow lights as you can lay your hands on and write "Emergency Response Unit" across every panel or window.
The most amusing bit is to ask Head Scout "Who put you in charge then?"

Edited by Crossflow Kid on Thursday 12th May 15:17
Loads of these types round my area. Lots of that anti-skid flooring stuff riveted down the sides. Just reminds me of The Fast Show - "Let's off-road!". Do they belong to some national organisation, or are they simply self-important and delusional?

PS It was Mole Valley Tools. (Like the 4X4 response guys.....)
Next time I give up my Boxing day to answer a callout to ferry district nurses through floodwater to their housebound patients, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I'm running late for work, but stop to tow a broken down car off a dangerous busy road to a nearby carpark, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.

The next time a handful of people work tirelessly to extract thousands of cars from a rain-soaked festival, I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to hear your kind words.

But hey, what would I know? I'm only a member of a highly professional organisation, trained by time served off road instructors, that the normal emergency services often turn to for volunteer manpower, or logistical help in extreme circumstances.

Crossflow Kid

11,272 posts

139 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
Eric Mc said:
Are you guys saying volunteering is wrong?

Is being civic minded a despicable attribute?
Well yeah, I see your point, but with the 4x4 lot of it was based more around pointing out how the group "leader's" vehicle was the benchmark for preparedness and highlighting the alleged shortcomings of anyone else's wagon, and then reminding everyone how said group "leader" would also oversee all training and assessments.
It appeared to attract people with no real responsibility in their lives, so they went along in the hope of finding some and when that failed they'd make some up.

ClaphamGT3

7,863 posts

191 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.

.
Has it ever occurred to you that YOU are a member of the public, you pompous twerp.....

Tango13

5,463 posts

124 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I give up my Boxing day to answer a callout to ferry district nurses through floodwater to their housebound patients, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I'm running late for work, but stop to tow a broken down car off a dangerous busy road to a nearby carpark, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.

The next time a handful of people work tirelessly to extract thousands of cars from a rain-soaked festival, I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to hear your kind words.

But hey, what would I know? I'm only a member of a highly professional organisation, trained by time served off road instructors, that the normal emergency services often turn to for volunteer manpower, or logistical help in extreme circumstances.
Maybe next time you crash and burn with some poor girl that you've been boring to half to death with your tales of 4 X 4 heroics you should remember his kind words? hehe

ReaperCushions

3,826 posts

132 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
nicanary said:
Crossflow Kid said:
Don't tell 'em your name Pike!

If you want a real laugh take a look at the numerous "4x4 Response" groups that have sprung up in recent years, apparently to assist the emergency services in times of need by providing 4x4 transport, or maybe it's to turn up and tell senior fire officers of thirty years standing that their disaster plan is all wrong.
The key thing however, is to offer up a battered low-spec Land Rover Discovery, weigh it down with ten tonnes of pointless crap like shovels, ropes and stuff, add as many flashing yellow lights as you can lay your hands on and write "Emergency Response Unit" across every panel or window.
The most amusing bit is to ask Head Scout "Who put you in charge then?"

Edited by Crossflow Kid on Thursday 12th May 15:17
Loads of these types round my area. Lots of that anti-skid flooring stuff riveted down the sides. Just reminds me of The Fast Show - "Let's off-road!". Do they belong to some national organisation, or are they simply self-important and delusional?

PS It was Mole Valley Tools. (Like the 4X4 response guys.....)
Next time I give up my Boxing day to answer a callout to ferry district nurses through floodwater to their housebound patients, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I'm running late for work, but stop to tow a broken down car off a dangerous busy road to a nearby carpark, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.

The next time a handful of people work tirelessly to extract thousands of cars from a rain-soaked festival, I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to hear your kind words.

But hey, what would I know? I'm only a member of a highly professional organisation, trained by time served off road instructors, that the normal emergency services often turn to for volunteer manpower, or logistical help in extreme circumstances.


limpsfield

4,856 posts

201 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.
Love this

wolfracesonic

3,736 posts

75 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
limpsfield said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.
Love this
Maybe it's a false eye and CC can't sleep with it in.

steveo3002

6,882 posts

122 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all

Zod

35,295 posts

206 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ClaphamGT3 said:
austinsmirk said:
not much will top a meeting of council tenants on an estate, airing whatever issue they have.

the meeting may start with:

Right, we've X million to spend on yr homes: yr all getting bathrooms, kitchens, central heating, alarms, re-wires et al- for free.

and it will descend into utter carnage from there.


All hosted in a flat roofed community centre, with a flat roof pub nearby.

Ultimately you'll fail to deliver 100% of a scheme because varying nutters won't let you do the works: because they're having some weird battle with the system that you don't know about. They think you care, the reality is you don't. But it would be nice if future occupants of the houses did have those works done that were once available.
This group will always want the works done by magic, last year and to a standard that would make Candy & Candy look down-rent. This is their right apparently and anyone who dares to suggest to the contrary is an out of touch, plutocratic self-pleasurist
confused but Candy & Candy does look down-rent.

EnglishTony

2,552 posts

47 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
viscountdallara said:
EnglishTony said:
Are they allowed to set fire to Jersey?
Nah !!
Donkeys can't light matches wink

Just as well really given their attitude to crâpauds and grockels.


nicanary

7,062 posts

94 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
nicanary said:
Crossflow Kid said:
Don't tell 'em your name Pike!

If you want a real laugh take a look at the numerous "4x4 Response" groups that have sprung up in recent years, apparently to assist the emergency services in times of need by providing 4x4 transport, or maybe it's to turn up and tell senior fire officers of thirty years standing that their disaster plan is all wrong.
The key thing however, is to offer up a battered low-spec Land Rover Discovery, weigh it down with ten tonnes of pointless crap like shovels, ropes and stuff, add as many flashing yellow lights as you can lay your hands on and write "Emergency Response Unit" across every panel or window.
The most amusing bit is to ask Head Scout "Who put you in charge then?"

Edited by Crossflow Kid on Thursday 12th May 15:17
Loads of these types round my area. Lots of that anti-skid flooring stuff riveted down the sides. Just reminds me of The Fast Show - "Let's off-road!". Do they belong to some national organisation, or are they simply self-important and delusional?

PS It was Mole Valley Tools. (Like the 4X4 response guys.....)
Next time I give up my Boxing day to answer a callout to ferry district nurses through floodwater to their housebound patients, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I'm running late for work, but stop to tow a broken down car off a dangerous busy road to a nearby carpark, I'll remember your kind words.

Next time I spend a snowy Christmas sober, sleeping with one eye on my phone, I'll remember your kind words.

The next time a handful of people work tirelessly to extract thousands of cars from a rain-soaked festival, I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to hear your kind words.

But hey, what would I know? I'm only a member of a highly professional organisation, trained by time served off road instructors, that the normal emergency services often turn to for volunteer manpower, or logistical help in extreme circumstances.
I have never, ever, seen a 4X4 response vehicle doing anything. Maybe I live in a safe and quiet area. I really didn't realise it actually was an organisation - I thought they were stickers and add-ons bought from Halfords. Seriously.

wildcat45

Original Poster:

7,161 posts

137 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ClaphamGT3 said:
Has it ever occurred to you that YOU are a member of the public, you pompous twerp.....
I don't want to criticise the guy as I really have no idea about what he does, however you point out something I have noticed in the past. Referring to members of the public as if they are not part of that group themselves. Unless you are Royalty or in the military you are a member of the public. That includes police, councils, coastguard and other civilian groups with official powers or authority over OTHER members of the public.

Somebody was telling me recently about Radio Hams. There was some sort of event, all organised and risk assessed and some Hams turned up to "manage comms" before proceeding to get in the way, try to call the shots and generally bugger about.

Back to my OP. I forgot to mention another priceless individual. There had been brief mention as part of an overview that the police would have a Bronze Command on site. This was in a gathering of 100-plus people. The man is H. The organiser is O:

H: Will we get radios?
O: No.
H: Why not?
O: Your role won't require you to have one. The person supervising you all will have one.
H: If there's an incident, I'll need to be updating the Bronze, no the Gold Commander.
O: You won't.
H: But if there's an incident, how can I take charge if you won't give me the tools to do the job. I will need a radio with access to the police commanders. I need to be able to...

And so it went on until he fell. Silent. Then, a little later.

H: What about uniforms?
O: I was coming to that, we'll be giving you all Tee shirts.
H: What about a High-Viz jacket? Will there be badges? How will people - the general public, participants and the police be able to recognise my status if there aren't any badges?

So basically this inadequate bloke wanted to be a policeman.

To be clear, the volunteer role is to act as a friend to teams of participants. Many will be from overseas. The role is to pass on info from the organisers and make sure the participants are having their needs met.

I just thought it might make a nice few days break from the routine over the summer. A chance do something different and maybe learn some stuff from people from China, Kenya, Brasil or whatever while having fun. It seems instead I'll be in constant piss take mode doing my best to annoy pompous self important tts.





Crossflow Kid

11,272 posts

139 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
But hey, what would I know? I'm only a member of a highly professional organisation, trained by time served off road instructors, that the normal emergency services often turn to for volunteer manpower, or logistical help in extreme circumstances.
Professional? Do me a favour. The lot I saw (at a larger non-"response" LR event) were an embarrassment, bedecking their vehicles with misleading/non-compliant high visibility graphics and lighting, swanning about the place like they were a cut above the rest of society and that having the words "Emergency Response" across your back window and a yellow light bar front and rear gives you a waiver against the event traffic planning that everyone else seems happy to comply with.
And what's this about the "normal" emergency services? Are you seriously suggesting the 4x4 Response movement is a niche service that somehow picks up where real blue light responses fall short? Have you any idea just how condescending and self-important that comes across as?

Huff

2,528 posts

139 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
austinsmirk said:
not much will top a meeting of council tenants on an estate, airing whatever issue they have.
...

and it will descend into utter carnage from there.
So true, also with Planning 'community consultation' events when trying to regenerate a site in deprived areas.


At risk of appearing to mock the afflicted, which I truly do not mean to do: my most-memorable bizarre experience was presenting to one (of many) local special-interest group over plans for a major community health scheme in Bristol, about 6yrs ago. It had taken years of work to get the whole scheme that far, and we actively wanted to canvas opinions from everytone who'd use it, need to visit, lived in the catchment etc - and listen. We tried really hard.

Anyway, this particular panel was well-meant and constituted certain very-local persons with a variety of quite severe impediments, and we were reviewing accessibility, wayfinding, all that good stuff. The panel had a range of visual, hearing physical and nervous impediments; all deeply unfunny in severity.


The Chairman had, amongst other issues, Tourette's Syndrome to a, ahem, marked degree - great start
The Blind Guy's dog helped itself to the chairmans lunch, part way through.

Bedlam.

Quhet

1,794 posts

94 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.
Surely a few cones and a sign could have done the job?




wolfracesonic

3,736 posts

75 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
wildcat45 said:
I don't want to criticise the guy as I really have no idea about what he does, however you point out something I have noticed in the past. Referring to members of the public as if they are not part of that group themselves. Unless you are Royalty or in the military you are a member of the public. That includes police, councils, coastguard and other civilian groups with official powers or authority over OTHER members of the public.

Somebody was telling me recently about Radio Hams. There was some sort of event, all organised and risk assessed and some Hams turned up to "manage comms" before proceeding to get in the way, try to call the shots and generally bugger about.

Back to my OP. I forgot to mention another priceless individual. There had been brief mention as part of an overview that the police would have a Bronze Command on site. This was in a gathering of 100-plus people. The man is H. The organiser is O:

H: Will we get radios?
O: No.
H: Why not?
O: Your role won't require you to have one. The person supervising you all will have one.
H: If there's an incident, I'll need to be updating the Bronze, no the Gold Commander.
O: You won't.
H: But if there's an incident, how can I take charge if you won't give me the tools to do the job. I will need a radio with access to the police commanders. I need to be able to...

And so it went on until he fell. Silent. Then, a little later.

H: What about uniforms?
O: I was coming to that, we'll be giving you all Tee shirts.
H: What about a High-Viz jacket? Will there be badges? How will people - the general public, participants and the police be able to recognise my status if there aren't any badges?

So basically this inadequate bloke wanted to be a policeman.

To be clear, the volunteer role is to act as a friend to teams of participants. Many will be from overseas. The role is to pass on info from the organisers and make sure the participants are having their needs met.

I just thought it might make a nice few days break from the routine over the summer. A chance do something different and maybe learn some stuff from people from China, Kenya, Brasil or whatever while having fun. It seems instead I'll be in constant piss take mode doing my best to annoy pompous self important tts.
Maybe one of these would have been a good compromise.


Quhet

1,794 posts

94 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
[quote=Huff]

So true, also with Planning 'community consultation' events when trying to regenerate a site in deprived areas.
quote]
Any sort of planning meeting about anything!
Full of absolute nutcaseslaugh

Crossflow Kid

11,272 posts

139 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
Quhet said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Next time I spend all day standing in the pouring rain, copping vile abuse from entitled members of the public who think they can ignore an approved road closure put in place for the safety of a St George's Day parade, I'll remember your kind words.
Surely a few cones and a sign could have done the job?
...not to mention that if people want to ignore a road closure there's sweet FA anyone can do about it unless their hi-viz has the letters P-O-L-I-C-E across the shoulders.

ThunderGuts

10,306 posts

142 months

Thursday 12th May 2016
quotequote all
Gotta love a line up