Purchase to die for
Discussion
Not the happiest subject for discussion, but it is part of life I suppose. Wife and I have opted for a woodland burial and are in process of purchasing our plots. We are also intending to take out a funeral plan or a outright pre-purchase of our wishes.
Looking at funeral plans they all seem to be around the same exorbitant cost, however for us the motivation is once all is purchased we can forget about it. Our family will not be burdened emotionally or financially when the day of reckoning arrives.
The question is which funeral director to choose, television documentary a few years back revealed some bad practices by one National well known brand. So a case of pick a straw.
Looking at funeral plans they all seem to be around the same exorbitant cost, however for us the motivation is once all is purchased we can forget about it. Our family will not be burdened emotionally or financially when the day of reckoning arrives.
The question is which funeral director to choose, television documentary a few years back revealed some bad practices by one National well known brand. So a case of pick a straw.
I suppose this is one of those subjects where there won't be many people around who can give you firsthand experience of the whole process 
I think it is a great thing to do though. You get what you want and you have the comfort of knowing your family don't have to run around sorting stuff out at the most difficult time.
I think it is a great thing to do though. You get what you want and you have the comfort of knowing your family don't have to run around sorting stuff out at the most difficult time.
I'm going to be cremated, and my only stipulation (genuinely) is that the hearse is a Bentley, Mercedes, or Rolls Royce. No way is my last journey going to be in one of those s
tty Vauxhall Insignia or Ford Mondeo hearses.
I really don't like the idea of being burnt, but it's preferable to the idea of being buried in the cold damp ground and left to very slowly decompose ***shudder***
tty Vauxhall Insignia or Ford Mondeo hearses.I really don't like the idea of being burnt, but it's preferable to the idea of being buried in the cold damp ground and left to very slowly decompose ***shudder***
crankedup said:
The question is which funeral director to choose, television documentary a few years back revealed some bad practices by one National well known brand. So a case of pick a straw.
Just used a very long established (like 150yrs) local firm for my Mum - turned out when I came to pay that they're owned by a group who have been busy snapping up funeral directors.Interesting on the cost - they handled my Dad's funeral too, with a few months short of ten years between them. I found the bill amongst my Mum's papers and the cost had pretty well doubled. The firm had been acquired by its new owners in that time.
They're not cheap, but I must admit that I felt I got my moneys worth with my mums funeral a few years back.
Some of the costs were probably less than "normal" since she had quite strong views on "wasting" money on flowers and a coffin which was going to get set on fire - so some of those things were as budget as possible, simply because that's what she wanted. On the other hand - she had some very unusual requests - which I thought wouldn't be possible - but the funeral directors came through with everything she asked for, and did a superb job - but obviously those things cost money.
Some of the costs were probably less than "normal" since she had quite strong views on "wasting" money on flowers and a coffin which was going to get set on fire - so some of those things were as budget as possible, simply because that's what she wanted. On the other hand - she had some very unusual requests - which I thought wouldn't be possible - but the funeral directors came through with everything she asked for, and did a superb job - but obviously those things cost money.
After my mum passed away ,we were caught on the hop but sorted it very promptly with the help of a local independent Funeral Director .
Dad then bought a funeral plan and informed us of the basics that he would like .
We used the same Directors as for mum and they were fantastic in sorting out a crematorium.
The pre organization made a sad time so much easier for the whole family .
Once you have sorted all your details get it all written down and leave copies with all the key people .
Funerals can be as expensive or economic as you wish .
Dad then bought a funeral plan and informed us of the basics that he would like .
We used the same Directors as for mum and they were fantastic in sorting out a crematorium.
The pre organization made a sad time so much easier for the whole family .
Once you have sorted all your details get it all written down and leave copies with all the key people .
Funerals can be as expensive or economic as you wish .
Can't you donate yourself to the local hospital for students to snigger at before they dismember you?
Don't they actually pay you a paltry fee for this whilst you're alive, plus arrange the disposal of your severed parts at their expense in some gruesome ceremony that people you know can attend?
Don't they actually pay you a paltry fee for this whilst you're alive, plus arrange the disposal of your severed parts at their expense in some gruesome ceremony that people you know can attend?
Sheepshanks said:
crankedup said:
The question is which funeral director to choose, television documentary a few years back revealed some bad practices by one National well known brand. So a case of pick a straw.
Just used a very long established (like 150yrs) local firm for my Mum - turned out when I came to pay that they're owned by a group who have been busy snapping up funeral directors.Interesting on the cost - they handled my Dad's funeral too, with a few months short of ten years between them. I found the bill amongst my Mum's papers and the cost had pretty well doubled. The firm had been acquired by its new owners in that time.
Me, as I said in my op, it's a woodland burial in a very simple pine board coffin. My parting music will be 'spirit in the sky' and my transport to the wood will be a 30cwt Bedford flatbed.
Sorted.
crankedup said:
Indeed, an American Company has been busy buying independants for some years, and, as you found, the independants name is kept after the business changes hands. This particular American Company have also brought with it some 'unusual ' upselling products. For example following cremation why not purchase the love locket which contains some of your loved ones cremated remains, so they are always 'close to your heart'. I find some of that truely distasteful, but others may care for it and it is offered. at a price.
Me, as I said in my op, it's a woodland burial in a very simple pine board coffin. My parting music will be 'spirit in the sky' and my transport to the wood will be a 30cwt Bedford flatbed.
Sorted.
I imagine there are people who will want that - a lot of the funeral stuff is far more for the living than the dead. My mums attitude to her ashes were : I'm dead, it's ash - chuck it in a skip. But some of my relatives got together to scatter the ashes somewhere that they felt was relevant - guess it made them feel better.Me, as I said in my op, it's a woodland burial in a very simple pine board coffin. My parting music will be 'spirit in the sky' and my transport to the wood will be a 30cwt Bedford flatbed.
Sorted.
davek_964 said:
crankedup said:
Indeed, an American Company has been busy buying independants for some years, and, as you found, the independants name is kept after the business changes hands. This particular American Company have also brought with it some 'unusual ' upselling products. For example following cremation why not purchase the love locket which contains some of your loved ones cremated remains, so they are always 'close to your heart'. I find some of that truely distasteful, but others may care for it and it is offered. at a price.
Me, as I said in my op, it's a woodland burial in a very simple pine board coffin. My parting music will be 'spirit in the sky' and my transport to the wood will be a 30cwt Bedford flatbed.
Sorted.
I imagine there are people who will want that - a lot of the funeral stuff is far more for the living than the dead. My mums attitude to her ashes were : I'm dead, it's ash - chuck it in a skip. But some of my relatives got together to scatter the ashes somewhere that they felt was relevant - guess it made them feel better.Me, as I said in my op, it's a woodland burial in a very simple pine board coffin. My parting music will be 'spirit in the sky' and my transport to the wood will be a 30cwt Bedford flatbed.
Sorted.
I dont think people should be buried myself, whole swathes of land devoted to the dead, cant see the point, bodies should be cremated or other clean method of disposal.
I hate funerals, when anyone dies "Will be better once the funeral is over", well why have one, deal with the body in private and after a while perhaps have a celebration, no black clothes, no minister with a few things written down, no 15 minute service, no religion, no hearses, no coffins, no old blokes with impossibly hairy red boozers noses carrying the coffin yet looking at deaths door themselves, no flowers, no choked relatives reading eulogies.
The funeral practices these days are generally just watered down versions of a Victorian one and cost like 5 grand.
I hate funerals, when anyone dies "Will be better once the funeral is over", well why have one, deal with the body in private and after a while perhaps have a celebration, no black clothes, no minister with a few things written down, no 15 minute service, no religion, no hearses, no coffins, no old blokes with impossibly hairy red boozers noses carrying the coffin yet looking at deaths door themselves, no flowers, no choked relatives reading eulogies.
The funeral practices these days are generally just watered down versions of a Victorian one and cost like 5 grand.
Having just gone through this twice in 8 months with parents, we used a local independent who was fantastic. They have been going for years and they did everything as instructed. Cost was just short of £4k each with Jaguar hearse and one car plus reception for 50 people.
This was in South Yorkshire and we could have done it cheaper.
If I was pre paying I would go with the Co op as they will not change and do a bunk with the money.
For me the key thing is actually talking about what is inevitable, my wife wants a woodland burial, but she has asked me to wait until she dies naturally. I am to be cremated and my ashes to go with her or scattered if she went first on her plot.
We have discussed this with our daughter so there is nothing left for her to do other than hand over the cash and let then do their job.
I went to a funeral of a staff member of mine, who had arranged everything in advance, the motorcycle hearse, the music, the food everything. It was probably one of the nicest funeral as it was everything about him and was not due to any impending death just good thoughtful preparation
This was in South Yorkshire and we could have done it cheaper.
If I was pre paying I would go with the Co op as they will not change and do a bunk with the money.
For me the key thing is actually talking about what is inevitable, my wife wants a woodland burial, but she has asked me to wait until she dies naturally. I am to be cremated and my ashes to go with her or scattered if she went first on her plot.
We have discussed this with our daughter so there is nothing left for her to do other than hand over the cash and let then do their job.
I went to a funeral of a staff member of mine, who had arranged everything in advance, the motorcycle hearse, the music, the food everything. It was probably one of the nicest funeral as it was everything about him and was not due to any impending death just good thoughtful preparation
drainbrain said:
Can't you donate yourself to the local hospital for students to snigger at before they dismember you?
My mum (who died in her late 50's) had arranged to do this but hadn't told any of us. It was not great for my Dad and sisters as there was no proper funeral and they didn't get to say goodbye properly. My dad and I also had to go see the University coordinator who was a wee bitty tactless given why we there. We did have a memorial service instead of a funeral but we had to arrange that ourselves and it was a bit stressful at a time when we didn't really need it.I got a call about 2 years later simply to tell me that the body had been cremated and could I please pick up the ashes.
I wouldn't recommend it.
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