Any other expectant Dads?

[richatnort]

Evening gents, any advice on things to help with teething? She's alergic to dairy so not sure if the usual teething remedies would be good or not? She's got a Sophie giraffe but she isn't bothered about that or putting things in her mouth yet but she's got red gums and getting cranky and fussy when feeding. Coming up to 5 months now!

[Mr Tom]

Hello Everyone,

Charles is 12days old now and doing well. We are combi feeding at the moment and are currently using cow and gate formula. He seems to be doing well on it. However, I have been looking at a few articles and it seems as though DHA levels are important in brain development and can contribute to an increase in future intelligence.

Cow and gate has 0.006% of milk and whereas SMA has 0.86% which (apparently) is more in line with breast milk levels. Other than that the rest of the composition between the two is very similar.
Do you think it is worth changing for this reason alone or would you just continue on cow and gate?

Many thanks,

Tom

[CharlieH89]

richatnort said:

Evening gents, any advice on things to help with teething? She's alergic to dairy so not sure if the usual teething remedies would be good or not? She's got a Sophie giraffe but she isn't bothered about that or putting things in her mouth yet but she's got red gums and getting cranky and fussy when feeding. Coming up to 5 months now!

Anbesol. Life saver.

[richatnort]

Mr Tom said:

Hello Everyone,

Charles is 12days old now and doing well. We are combi feeding at the moment and are currently using cow and gate formula. He seems to be doing well on it. However, I have been looking at a few articles and it seems as though DHA levels are important in brain development and can contribute to an increase in future intelligence.

Cow and gate has 0.006% of milk and whereas SMA has 0.86% which (apparently) is more in line with breast milk levels. Other than that the rest of the composition between the two is very similar.
Do you think it is worth changing for this reason alone or would you just continue on cow and gate?

Many thanks,

Tom

Good to see another combi fed family, we are combi too . I think it's much of a muchness especially if he's having breast milk too he'll be getting way more from that!

[vaud]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

The ICBM of teething is calpol and then Anbesol liquid, the latter is Benzocaine + alcohol applied to the gums... can also be used on adults.

Some kids seem to be fine with a cold teething ring. Others are more sensitive and need more.

[Feirny]

Martin_Hx said:

This is what my Mrs said, we will see how we get on but like you said it will be brill just clipping and moving the baby from the car to the whatever without unclipping them.

Unpacking the 360 tonight so will have a quick nosey and get it registered!

Notice that you're in Elland, have you been to Mama's and Papa's and looked through all their sale stuff, I spent a small fortune!

[filthypig]

Feirny said:

Change the bottles you’re using, we struggled with some but bought some Mam ones and they’re great now.

Another thumbs up for Mam bottles here. We bought all the Tommy Tippee anti-colic bottles plus steriliser and our lad just couldn't get on with them. Tried a free (from Boots Baby Club) Mam bottle and he took to them straight away. Went out and bought 6 of them. Self sterilise too in a microwave which is a big plus!

[Japveesix]

Mr Tom said:

Hello Everyone,

Charles is 12days old now and doing well. We are combi feeding at the moment and are currently using cow and gate formula. He seems to be doing well on it. However, I have been looking at a few articles and it seems as though DHA levels are important in brain development and can contribute to an increase in future intelligence.

Cow and gate has 0.006% of milk and whereas SMA has 0.86% which (apparently) is more in line with breast milk levels. Other than that the rest of the composition between the two is very similar.
Do you think it is worth changing for this reason alone or would you just continue on cow and gate?

Many thanks,

Tom

Could try taking the PregnaCare capsules which are designed for breast feeding (or the identical Morrisons equivalent that are far cheaper). They Have everything in plus plenty of DHA and my partner was recommended to have them as she has a very complex diet (not through choice).

But probably with plenty of breast milk you don't have to worry about it too much.

[malks222]

CharlieH89 said:

Congrats first of all!

We were quite lucky in that we had our own room and I could stay overnight. It was amazing just lying with my hours old daughter in a little tub next to my head snoring.
I feel sorry for the baby seeing 17 year olds. Especially when they won’t have money but I’ve known people who haven’t had the maturity to be able to offer the love too, then the 35 year old ‘nan’ is kind of the parent.
The 17 year old misses out on so much in life. I’ve filled a lot of my life being 30 and I still want to do more.

absolutely, it’s actually upsetting thinking about how much love and attention you are giving your baby and that some poor baby opposite isn’t getting the same start in life. unfortunately i don’t think the parents have the love to give, I thought they’d be doing everything to try and prove people wrong, but they’ve already been given a lecture about noting on the sheet when they feed/ change the baby. the worst part is, they’re not filling the sheet out because they aren’t actually doing anything and midwives are actually doing it all and the kids haven’t realised this.

but anyway, it’s been a crazy wonderful few days already. my wife seems to be doing great with feeding and the baby has been so chilled and well behaved. she was happy to try breast feeding, but we were happy that if she struggled/ couldn’t or even just didn’t enjoy/ want too, that we would be happy with bottle feeding. but so far has taken to this so well, that we’re actually a bit shocked!!! we know it’s going to change and some tough days are always just around the corner, but just loving this start to life that codie is having!

[theboss]

Squishey said:

Re. car seats. We went for the Maxi-Cosi Pebble with a Family Fix base in each car, then once he'd grown out of the Pebble we got the Pearl for my car (as he's only in it occasionally) and got an Axiss-Fix Air for the wife's car.

The Maxi-Cosi stuff is really good quality and easy to use, they come apart easily for washing too. I've still got a Pebble and Family Fix base which I will sell if anyone is interested, PM me. I'm in Ipswich but work in Lowestoft so can arrange to drop it off along the A12 somewhere.

I just had the i-Size pebble plus and 3-way base delivered having rated the maxi-cost stuff very highly when my precious children were born (10-15 years ago!). Seems like really decent stuff again as expected. Haven’t tried fitting it yet but it seems intuitive enough.

[ED209]

Had a tough few days, Sophie is now 8 weeks old and doing well but I think the stress of her arriving early and general new baby stress has started to take its toll

I’m fully back at work now on 12 hour shifts, this means on work days I basically have no time for Sophie, the wife or myself. I’m also just knackered. My sleep pattern was poor before baby arrived and now it’s worse. I know it shouldn’t be but my mood is really low and I am not getting any joy from anything at the moment. At some points I am thinking it would be best if I wasn’t around.

I can tell the wife is suffering as well, she’s had a few tears and is really snappy with me. Maybe it’s sometimes deserved, maybe it’s not. We don’t seem to have a relationship at the moment.

At 42 I knew first child would be a challenge but I really feel like I am struggling at the moment. I think the wife is too. Maybe all this is normal, maybe it’s not? I really don’t feel I can talk to anyone about it either.

[Martin_Hx]

Feirny said:

Martin_Hx said:

This is what my Mrs said, we will see how we get on but like you said it will be brill just clipping and moving the baby from the car to the whatever without unclipping them.

Unpacking the 360 tonight so will have a quick nosey and get it registered!

Notice that you're in Elland, have you been to Mama's and Papa's and looked through all their sale stuff, I spent a small fortune!

Definitely! We have bought some bits from there already (been popping over every month or so) and will be back once he is born for more useless things when he is a little older.... i loved the sit on caterpillar rocker

Last time we were there we overheard people had traveled hours to get there, quite lucky for it to be just 10/15 minutes away. it is always very busy though but us new parents do like a good bargain

[Martin_Hx]

ED209 said:

Had a tough few days, Sophie is now 8 weeks old and doing well but I think the stress of her arriving early and general new baby stress has started to take its toll

I’m fully back at work now on 12 hour shifts, this means on work days I basically have no time for Sophie, the wife or myself. I’m also just knackered. My sleep pattern was poor before baby arrived and now it’s worse. I know it shouldn’t be but my mood is really low and I am not getting any joy from anything at the moment. At some points I am thinking it would be best if I wasn’t around.

I can tell the wife is suffering as well, she’s had a few tears and is really snappy with me. Maybe it’s sometimes deserved, maybe it’s not. We don’t seem to have a relationship at the moment.

At 42 I knew first child would be a challenge but I really feel like I am struggling at the moment. I think the wife is too. Maybe all this is normal, maybe it’s not? I really don’t feel I can talk to anyone about it either.

Im 37 and ours first isn't due until the 20th of Jan but from what i have read online, many dad's feel exactly the same way, you are very much not alone! I think its all about just staying strong and perceive, it can only get better

My Mrs will be breast feeding, so i do not know how much interaction i will get with the baby in the first few weeks/months, as i think its very much a mother/baby time.

[richatnort]

ED209 said:

Had a tough few days, Sophie is now 8 weeks old and doing well but I think the stress of her arriving early and general new baby stress has started to take its toll

I’m fully back at work now on 12 hour shifts, this means on work days I basically have no time for Sophie, the wife or myself. I’m also just knackered. My sleep pattern was poor before baby arrived and now it’s worse. I know it shouldn’t be but my mood is really low and I am not getting any joy from anything at the moment. At some points I am thinking it would be best if I wasn’t around.

I can tell the wife is suffering as well, she’s had a few tears and is really snappy with me. Maybe it’s sometimes deserved, maybe it’s not. We don’t seem to have a relationship at the moment.

At 42 I knew first child would be a challenge but I really feel like I am struggling at the moment. I think the wife is too. Maybe all this is normal, maybe it’s not? I really don’t feel I can talk to anyone about it either.

Yeh stick with it mate we felt after 12 weeks a haze lifted and we felt like we knew what we were doing. Sleep is a big issue! If you have friends and relatives nearby call on them to help you don't be afraid to do so they won't think ill of you, we all need help!

[Jasandjules]

ED209 said:

At 42 I knew first child would be a challenge but I really feel like I am struggling at the moment. I think the wife is too. Maybe all this is normal, maybe it’s not? I really don’t feel I can talk to anyone about it either.

My OH and I were also "older" than most when we had our first. Feel free to PM if you need to vent.

But it does get easier for you both, this is a massive change in your life that no-one and nothing actually prepares you for. Nothing can prepare you. But it does get easier.

[vonuber]

ED209 said:

At 42 I knew first child would be a challenge but I really feel like I am struggling at the moment. I think the wife is too. Maybe all this is normal, maybe it’s not? I really don’t feel I can talk to anyone about it either.

35 for our first and 36 for the second here, it has been really, really hard for the first 3 odd years (we are now nearly 5 in).

It is tough, especially the first 3 to 6 months, there is no dressing it up. Lack of sleep, stress, constant worry, losing your life to a demanding little st who just seems to cry, eat and st constantly.

But honestly it does get better, and the feeling you get when the first time they come and sit on you to watch tv, or run to hug you when you get home? Indescribable.


They both can still be little sts though, on the plus side I get to play with Lego and trains again.

[vaud]

vonuber said:

on the plus side I get to play with Lego

I upped my game this year and got our 6 year old Lego Boost. Lego and Robotics. Awesome.

[Jcwjosh]

Had our 20 week scan last week and things are progressing nicely.

Still sh** scared about the whole deed and not sure how i am going to be strong for other half but working on controlling my own anxiety.

When did you all buy buggys etc ? and how often do they really get used ?

we had a mini spree at mamas and papas on other bits last weekend, but still big ticket items to get - buggy car seat cot bed etc.

[vaud]

Jcwjosh said:

When did you all buy buggys etc ? and how often do they really get used ?

we had a mini spree at mamas and papas on other bits last weekend, but still big ticket items to get - buggy car seat cot bed etc.

We waited until about 30 weeks.

Went for a Mountain Buggy and it has been used for 6 years (2 kids) and has been outstanding. The youngest used it until about 3 1/2.

Looking back, some things I would just pick up used - there is loads on facebook marketplace. I'd buy a car seat base second hand, and a new car seat. Cot - second hand, buy a new mattress.

[Martin_Hx]

We got our pram/car seat+ bedroom furniture about 5 months in and just kept buying little stuff here and there, we will still need to buy stuff when he comes but can get most things in 24 hours or a quick nip out to the shops