Any other expectant Dads?
Discussion
Visit lots. Gut feel is part of it. Ofsted reports are worth roughly the paper they are printed on.
Just some brain dump...
Ask if they have a parent representative to talk with.
Look around, are staff on their phones... how easy was it to get in... how is the decor?
Is it part of a chain? How involved is the owner (some see it as part of their life, some see it as a business)? What qualifications does the owner/manager have? Are they on top of everything? Ask what they would do if there was a fire right now... ask to see their first aid certifications, etc. A good nursery will be on top of everything...
How old are the staff? Are they picking school leavers and using them as cheap staff and then letting them go once they have trained up? Are many of the staff also parents? How many parents have sent multiple children there?
What is the menu? Is it cooked on the premises?
Try to visit in the middle of the day - drop off and pickup times can be quieter and kids can be flagging/crying at end of day.
We got lucky and found a nursery that sits in 4 acres with dance studio, a carousel, tennis courts, and outdoor play that cost less than any other nursery locally. In the nice weather they spend 6-7hours outside, and then fall asleep into their tea... happy and shattered.
Just some brain dump...
Ask if they have a parent representative to talk with.
Look around, are staff on their phones... how easy was it to get in... how is the decor?
Is it part of a chain? How involved is the owner (some see it as part of their life, some see it as a business)? What qualifications does the owner/manager have? Are they on top of everything? Ask what they would do if there was a fire right now... ask to see their first aid certifications, etc. A good nursery will be on top of everything...
How old are the staff? Are they picking school leavers and using them as cheap staff and then letting them go once they have trained up? Are many of the staff also parents? How many parents have sent multiple children there?
What is the menu? Is it cooked on the premises?
Try to visit in the middle of the day - drop off and pickup times can be quieter and kids can be flagging/crying at end of day.
We got lucky and found a nursery that sits in 4 acres with dance studio, a carousel, tennis courts, and outdoor play that cost less than any other nursery locally. In the nice weather they spend 6-7hours outside, and then fall asleep into their tea... happy and shattered.
As above, visit lots. One had a dog that nipped PG Jr, needless to say that was not the childminder we went with. We had 2 that came out tops, and only the location of one was the winning factor. Now that we know what's happening, the 2 are good friends, and often spend time at each others place, if ours is away at a funeral we are asked if we wouldn't mind collecting from the others, it's a really nice, relaxed feel.
Agree - visit lots. If you find one that you like and can't get in (like us - bit late in signing up), find option two and then move to option one as soon as possible.
As has been said, how secure, how attentive are staff, how clean (within reason - we're talking grubby, not paint and baked beans on the floor - that's standard), is it recommended by anyone you know, and does it provide facilities that are important to you, e.g. is the pre-school proper, or would you move little one before they start reception for a year of genuine pre-school (or not, your call). Food available, snack times, how they communicate with you on daily activities, the general feel of the place, it all factors in.
There's no right or wrong answer per say, but you'll know a wrong-un immediately. One we visited had a bolted door-sized gate, bolt at the top. The security for the garden was just that. Obviously kids can't get out, but anyone can get in... genius. We'd not spoken to anyone working there before we'd scrubbed that one from the list, but went in anyway and the feeling was confirmed. I ended up sitting on the floor reading to a girl who'd toddled over crying and stuck her arms up for a hug while my missus did the bare minimum tour. The staff were disinterested, minimum wage earners, only there because it was required of their training course. Our current nursery retains staff for years and have several that have been there 10 years plus. There was no price difference, but the actual difference is night and day.
As has been said, how secure, how attentive are staff, how clean (within reason - we're talking grubby, not paint and baked beans on the floor - that's standard), is it recommended by anyone you know, and does it provide facilities that are important to you, e.g. is the pre-school proper, or would you move little one before they start reception for a year of genuine pre-school (or not, your call). Food available, snack times, how they communicate with you on daily activities, the general feel of the place, it all factors in.
There's no right or wrong answer per say, but you'll know a wrong-un immediately. One we visited had a bolted door-sized gate, bolt at the top. The security for the garden was just that. Obviously kids can't get out, but anyone can get in... genius. We'd not spoken to anyone working there before we'd scrubbed that one from the list, but went in anyway and the feeling was confirmed. I ended up sitting on the floor reading to a girl who'd toddled over crying and stuck her arms up for a hug while my missus did the bare minimum tour. The staff were disinterested, minimum wage earners, only there because it was required of their training course. Our current nursery retains staff for years and have several that have been there 10 years plus. There was no price difference, but the actual difference is night and day.
richatnort said:
Why is it when you have a baby you decide you need a bigger house! Just going through the stress of finding a mortgage (luckily i have sarnie on hand) & getting solicitors in tow & then movers!
Been there, done that. Moved when our first was just under a year old and the house is plenty big enough for the four of us, hasn't stopped us toying with the idea of an extension however...thanks for the comments/ things to look for.
I need to have a proper chat with the wife and see what her initial thoughts are. On first visit there was nothing bad, security seemed good, buzzer entry etc.... staff all seemed nice a friendly, not too young/ potentially in training, kids all seemed happy, went right in the middle of the day just after feeding, place was clean/ tidy.
it all just seemed ‘fine’ to me. I don’t know what i was expecting, but didn’t come away thinking- wow my kids gonna learn loads and have an amazing time here. just a bit meh. we have more visits planned for other nurseries in the area, so hopefully things improve and we find somewhere nice.
altho I do wonder if the fact our baby is only 4wks old and we barely know what we’re doing, that we’re maybe not ready to looking at this stuff
I need to have a proper chat with the wife and see what her initial thoughts are. On first visit there was nothing bad, security seemed good, buzzer entry etc.... staff all seemed nice a friendly, not too young/ potentially in training, kids all seemed happy, went right in the middle of the day just after feeding, place was clean/ tidy.
it all just seemed ‘fine’ to me. I don’t know what i was expecting, but didn’t come away thinking- wow my kids gonna learn loads and have an amazing time here. just a bit meh. we have more visits planned for other nurseries in the area, so hopefully things improve and we find somewhere nice.
altho I do wonder if the fact our baby is only 4wks old and we barely know what we’re doing, that we’re maybe not ready to looking at this stuff
Also - don't be afraid to pick two nurseries.
Both of ours went to a local nursery for the baby room (8 months - 2 years) as we felt it was the best locally with those facilities. They don't do that much outside pre-walking. We got the daily sheets reporting activities, food, number of nappies, etc.
They then went/go to the bigger nursery at 2 (which doesn't have a baby room) which had much more outdoor activity and no reporting sheets... they still follow the Early Years Curriculum with a heavy focus on outdoor learning. Kids adjust pretty quickly (2-3 weeks)
Staff at ours are a mix of young (but wanting to qualify and the nursery is investing in them), more mature staff (some with kids), and a few grandmothers (part time / "bank staff"), which I think gives a nice mix. I want some of the staff to also be parents.
Also ask on your local facebook groups; it's a very personal decision and everyone has a different view of "good" but you might pick up some red flags.
Both of ours went to a local nursery for the baby room (8 months - 2 years) as we felt it was the best locally with those facilities. They don't do that much outside pre-walking. We got the daily sheets reporting activities, food, number of nappies, etc.
They then went/go to the bigger nursery at 2 (which doesn't have a baby room) which had much more outdoor activity and no reporting sheets... they still follow the Early Years Curriculum with a heavy focus on outdoor learning. Kids adjust pretty quickly (2-3 weeks)
Staff at ours are a mix of young (but wanting to qualify and the nursery is investing in them), more mature staff (some with kids), and a few grandmothers (part time / "bank staff"), which I think gives a nice mix. I want some of the staff to also be parents.
Also ask on your local facebook groups; it's a very personal decision and everyone has a different view of "good" but you might pick up some red flags.
Don't forget that nurseries are also likely to be ofsted inspected so you can read up on the reports if they have been inspected already. I've found that the inspectors really don't hold back in the reports and will be quite blunt about areas of concern regarding staff training and how well engaged the children are.
Also don't forget to ensure that you compare costs like-for-like. Ever since the introduction of "free" childcare hours by the government, many nurseries have had to make up the difference by charging for items previously included, such as nappies, food and lunchtime sessions. Some of the more expensive nurseries suddenly don't look too bad when it becomes apparent that they are still all inclusive whereas the smaller nurseries add on lots of items onto the base session rate.
Also don't forget to ensure that you compare costs like-for-like. Ever since the introduction of "free" childcare hours by the government, many nurseries have had to make up the difference by charging for items previously included, such as nappies, food and lunchtime sessions. Some of the more expensive nurseries suddenly don't look too bad when it becomes apparent that they are still all inclusive whereas the smaller nurseries add on lots of items onto the base session rate.
Stevil said:
richatnort said:
Why is it when you have a baby you decide you need a bigger house! Just going through the stress of finding a mortgage (luckily i have sarnie on hand) & getting solicitors in tow & then movers!
Been there, done that. Moved when our first was just under a year old and the house is plenty big enough for the four of us, hasn't stopped us toying with the idea of an extension however...There's only the three of us and a cat. I don't know what's wrong with me
Anyhoo, the little one has started throwing up and generally taking hours to settle after every feed. She might have a bit of a cold (wife and I have both had one in the last week), but I get the feeling that this is potentially GERD related, rather than viral.
My 2 penneth, we didn't like the nurseries we looked at, too much like factories and also expensive. But saying that, you get extra coverage if one is sick or wants to take a holiday.
We found a local childminder thats starting up at home after leaving managing a nursery to spend time with her youngest. Wouldn't change a thing,we get daily whatsapp photos/videos and text report, there is a curriculum that's followed and progress is tracked via the "famly" app. They do montessori style indoor play, go out to parks and things, and go and do things like soft play and play groups.
Were looking at moving to a bigger house too, and losing the childminder is the single con we have on the move.
We found a local childminder thats starting up at home after leaving managing a nursery to spend time with her youngest. Wouldn't change a thing,we get daily whatsapp photos/videos and text report, there is a curriculum that's followed and progress is tracked via the "famly" app. They do montessori style indoor play, go out to parks and things, and go and do things like soft play and play groups.
Were looking at moving to a bigger house too, and losing the childminder is the single con we have on the move.
We'll be starting to look at nursery places for our daughter later this year, but for now we've found an excellent childminder who has her one day a week, and can do additional days as she has done this week for us when my mother in law is on holiday.
Reputation from other parents was good, there's a local scheme that a number of childminders have signed up for, not sure if it is a national thing or not but ours is the "Octopus" scheme and I think its mainly about giving them access to facilities for childminders, as well as emergency coverage if, for example, one of the other children had an accident and needed care, that kind of thing. Obviously we haven't needed that so far.
one useful feature is that our childminder is signed up to the scheme whereby you can top up their pay via the government childcare scheme - you pay 80% of the cost and the government tops up the remaining 20% - there's a threshold on this but we're well under it.
Reputation from other parents was good, there's a local scheme that a number of childminders have signed up for, not sure if it is a national thing or not but ours is the "Octopus" scheme and I think its mainly about giving them access to facilities for childminders, as well as emergency coverage if, for example, one of the other children had an accident and needed care, that kind of thing. Obviously we haven't needed that so far.
one useful feature is that our childminder is signed up to the scheme whereby you can top up their pay via the government childcare scheme - you pay 80% of the cost and the government tops up the remaining 20% - there's a threshold on this but we're well under it.
HarryFlatters said:
Same. Moved from a 2 bed semi to a 4 bed detached in June, just before our tot arrived in September, and now I'm thinking about how much it'd be to knock out into the garden so we can make a bigger kitchen/dining room and re-position the downstairs shower room. Ho hum...
There's only the three of us and a cat. I don't know what's wrong with me
Anyhoo, the little one has started throwing up and generally taking hours to settle after every feed. She might have a bit of a cold (wife and I have both had one in the last week), but I get the feeling that this is potentially GERD related, rather than viral.
Yeh ours is the same RE cold this must be like her 8th! Keep an eye on the throwing up as could be reflux, could try some mam bottles that should help and then try and keep her up right as much as possible (30 mins roughly) after each feed that should help! Ours suffers from silent reflux so know all the tricks now to try and help it.There's only the three of us and a cat. I don't know what's wrong with me
Anyhoo, the little one has started throwing up and generally taking hours to settle after every feed. She might have a bit of a cold (wife and I have both had one in the last week), but I get the feeling that this is potentially GERD related, rather than viral.
richatnort said:
Yeh ours is the same RE cold this must be like her 8th! Keep an eye on the throwing up as could be reflux, could try some mam bottles that should help and then try and keep her up right as much as possible (30 mins roughly) after each feed that should help! Ours suffers from silent reflux so know all the tricks now to try and help it.
Hiya,We've got NUK anti-colic / wind / reflux bottles and some slow flow teats arriving today, hopefully these will help. We do keep her upright for as long as she'll tolerate after feeding, with plenty of back rubs and burping.
I've suspected that she's had silent reflux from the moment we got her home, which is now developing into upchucking reflux / GERD. Health visitor is coming on Monday, so I'll speak to her then, see if she wants us to persevere or get a docs appt. Gripe water and Infacol haven't helped - so much so that we now call them nope water and Doesfacol.
Maybe infant Gaviscon is the next step.
Re nursery search, just some more to add:
- look for availability of outdoor space and toys (e.g. sandpit) as kids generally love running around.
- check room staff turnover / length of service, perm/temp ratio. Check who is the designated Room Leader and length of experience as he/she is responsible for your kid's development. Some kids takes more time to settle, and they like continuity to bond and settle with the same nannies. Long serving perm nannies is generally a good sign / stable environment for your kid.
Ask the nanny if they includs any basic life skills as part of the daily routine. For examples:
Edit to add: kids can't read at that age, so the named peg has their picture to help them identify their coat peg.
- look for availability of outdoor space and toys (e.g. sandpit) as kids generally love running around.
- check room staff turnover / length of service, perm/temp ratio. Check who is the designated Room Leader and length of experience as he/she is responsible for your kid's development. Some kids takes more time to settle, and they like continuity to bond and settle with the same nannies. Long serving perm nannies is generally a good sign / stable environment for your kid.
Ask the nanny if they includs any basic life skills as part of the daily routine. For examples:
- In our nursery 18 months class (Toddlers), they introduce open cups in prep for the next class move at 24 months where open cup use is the norm.
- Taught to hang up their coat to their named pegs after coming in from outside play.
- Brush their teeth (my wife's best friend who runs 2 nurseries include this after breakfast which I think is brilliant)
Edit to add: kids can't read at that age, so the named peg has their picture to help them identify their coat peg.
Edited by chip* on Wednesday 29th January 13:44
chip* said:
Re nursery search, just some more to add:
- look for availability of outdoor space and toys (e.g. sandpit) as kids generally love running around.
- check room staff turnover / length of service, perm/temp ratio. Check who is the designated Room Leader and length of experience as he/she is responsible for your kid's development. Some kids takes more time to settle, and they like continuity to bond and settle with the same nannies. Long serving perm nannies is generally a good sign / stable environment for your kid.
Ask the nanny if they includs any basic life skills as part of the daily routine. For examples:
Edit to add: kids can't read at that age, so the named peg has their picture to help them identify their coat peg.
I did ask about teeth brushing at ours and they don't do it as the general advice from dentists is that you shouldn't brush teeth for at least an 30 minutes after eating as you've still got acids from the food in your mouth and are effectively brushing that into your teeth. Food for thought as such. They also advise that until kids are about 7 they won't be able to brush them properly anyway. I do our son's with an electric brush.- look for availability of outdoor space and toys (e.g. sandpit) as kids generally love running around.
- check room staff turnover / length of service, perm/temp ratio. Check who is the designated Room Leader and length of experience as he/she is responsible for your kid's development. Some kids takes more time to settle, and they like continuity to bond and settle with the same nannies. Long serving perm nannies is generally a good sign / stable environment for your kid.
Ask the nanny if they includs any basic life skills as part of the daily routine. For examples:
- In our nursery 18 months class (Toddlers), they introduce open cups in prep for the next class move at 24 months where open cup use is the norm.
- Taught to hang up their coat to their named pegs after coming in from outside play.
- Brush their teeth (my wife's best friend who runs 2 nurseries include this after breakfast which I think is brilliant)
Edit to add: kids can't read at that age, so the named peg has their picture to help them identify their coat peg.
Edited by chip* on Wednesday 29th January 13:44
Also, check nursery location and opening time.
We are fortunate to have 4 nurseries on our High Street all within 5-8 mins walk, and the train station just few mins away from the nurseries if one had to commute. Ideally find a decent local nursery (or one close to work if you drive), if not, check the traffic & parking as you need to factor this journey into your daily commute.
Most nurseries open from 7.30am - 6.00pm, but the one we selected open from 7.00am to 7.00pm (yes, it cost more) which would suit working parents. We don't do the full 12 hours stint as we feel it's way too long for the kid, so we drop off at 9am and pick up at 5pm.
We are fortunate to have 4 nurseries on our High Street all within 5-8 mins walk, and the train station just few mins away from the nurseries if one had to commute. Ideally find a decent local nursery (or one close to work if you drive), if not, check the traffic & parking as you need to factor this journey into your daily commute.
Most nurseries open from 7.30am - 6.00pm, but the one we selected open from 7.00am to 7.00pm (yes, it cost more) which would suit working parents. We don't do the full 12 hours stint as we feel it's way too long for the kid, so we drop off at 9am and pick up at 5pm.
And their flexibility if you are running late / broken train / etc.
Some are flexible for 10/15 mins after they "close" providing it is a one time (they are often tidying/doing paperwork anyway)
Some charge a late fee no matter what.
I heard of one nursery that if it was repeated 3 times would report it to social services...
We had a double failure one day (East Coast trains failed for me and then my wife's car broke down). The owner of the nursery (who also lives on site (it's a massive Victorian house with clear divides) took our little one for tea in her house and wouldn't hear of being paid. Thats said she had been running it for 28 yrs, and now her daughter runs it... more like extended family.
Some are flexible for 10/15 mins after they "close" providing it is a one time (they are often tidying/doing paperwork anyway)
Some charge a late fee no matter what.
I heard of one nursery that if it was repeated 3 times would report it to social services...
We had a double failure one day (East Coast trains failed for me and then my wife's car broke down). The owner of the nursery (who also lives on site (it's a massive Victorian house with clear divides) took our little one for tea in her house and wouldn't hear of being paid. Thats said she had been running it for 28 yrs, and now her daughter runs it... more like extended family.
Regardless of the nursery you choose, don't add up how much it will cost you until they go to school otherwise it will make you cry...
You also have to assume its a sunk cost otherwise each day they are ill and cant go, you have visions of £60 (or whatever) per day being flushed down the toilet.
You also have to assume its a sunk cost otherwise each day they are ill and cant go, you have visions of £60 (or whatever) per day being flushed down the toilet.
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff