Any other expectant Dads?
Discussion
Checking in - nothing much to report. It's amazing how much more relaxed your are 2nd time around. And way less naive (amusing talking to people expecting their first, having now understood expectations vs reality).
Third trimester now for no.2 and no.1 is getting noticeably more insistent that things are done by mum, or runs to her if he's upset and I'm about, which is quite challenging. Nothing like an angry toddler legging it to his mother to make you feel worthless and useless! My wife did mention something about a hormone rising at this point which might explain their greater attachment to her. When I'm expecting I'll be doing the bulk of no.2's care so that might be fun. To be fair they generally seem happier when there's just one parent, and goes off the rails when there's two. I don't know if anyone else has experienced this?
Third trimester now for no.2 and no.1 is getting noticeably more insistent that things are done by mum, or runs to her if he's upset and I'm about, which is quite challenging. Nothing like an angry toddler legging it to his mother to make you feel worthless and useless! My wife did mention something about a hormone rising at this point which might explain their greater attachment to her. When I'm expecting I'll be doing the bulk of no.2's care so that might be fun. To be fair they generally seem happier when there's just one parent, and goes off the rails when there's two. I don't know if anyone else has experienced this?
RenesisEvo said:
Checking in - nothing much to report. It's amazing how much more relaxed your are 2nd time around. And way less naive (amusing talking to people expecting their first, having now understood expectations vs reality).
Third trimester now for no.2 and no.1 is getting noticeably more insistent that things are done by mum, or runs to her if he's upset and I'm about, which is quite challenging. Nothing like an angry toddler legging it to his mother to make you feel worthless and useless! My wife did mention something about a hormone rising at this point which might explain their greater attachment to her. When I'm expecting I'll be doing the bulk of no.2's care so that might be fun. To be fair they generally seem happier when there's just one parent, and goes off the rails when there's two. I don't know if anyone else has experienced this?
To your last point, absolutely. Our 7 year old is an angel when it's 1 on 1 parenting. Can be, but not always a nightmare when you're both around. Weird.Third trimester now for no.2 and no.1 is getting noticeably more insistent that things are done by mum, or runs to her if he's upset and I'm about, which is quite challenging. Nothing like an angry toddler legging it to his mother to make you feel worthless and useless! My wife did mention something about a hormone rising at this point which might explain their greater attachment to her. When I'm expecting I'll be doing the bulk of no.2's care so that might be fun. To be fair they generally seem happier when there's just one parent, and goes off the rails when there's two. I don't know if anyone else has experienced this?
I love our days out when it's just me and him. Driving range, fish & chips and generally just messing around. Never plays up, never moans. Soon as there's 2 parents, carnage
Our 19 nearly 20 month old did his first escape act on Friday night!
Staying at my mums house, he doesn't have his own room there so stays in mums room in a travel bed next to mums bed, he managed to use her bed covers to pull himself up onto her bed, then got down, opened her door and made his way down the stairs to be found sitting at the bottom of the stairs with his milk and blanket.
He cant quite get his leg over the top of his normal bed yet but it wont be long.
Staying at my mums house, he doesn't have his own room there so stays in mums room in a travel bed next to mums bed, he managed to use her bed covers to pull himself up onto her bed, then got down, opened her door and made his way down the stairs to be found sitting at the bottom of the stairs with his milk and blanket.
He cant quite get his leg over the top of his normal bed yet but it wont be long.
ChocolateFrog said:
Anyone get a bit prickly when questioned about (and made to sign forms over) every little bruise and scratch by their nursery?
I don't know about everyone else's 2 and 3 year old boys but ours play rough, jump of things they probably shouldn't, fight, throw things, fall off things, crash into things every single day. They're both nuts.
"Can you explain this?, can you sign here? X has got these marks do you know what happened?
I know they're doing a job but I'm finding I'm getting more prickly about it.
Today's, and the reason for my s
t rant is a text "Hi, I've noticed a scratch on X's knee, how did it happen?".
"It wasn't there when I dropped him off, have you not been watching him?" Is apparently not an appropriate response.
Luckily the other half deals with most of it.
I know they're covering their arses but a bit of common sense wouldn't go amiss. If there were patterns and/or more serious injuries then fair enough but they know what our kids are like because they tell me when I pick them up.
A neighbour reported us to Social services. I don't know about everyone else's 2 and 3 year old boys but ours play rough, jump of things they probably shouldn't, fight, throw things, fall off things, crash into things every single day. They're both nuts.
"Can you explain this?, can you sign here? X has got these marks do you know what happened?
I know they're doing a job but I'm finding I'm getting more prickly about it.
Today's, and the reason for my s
t rant is a text "Hi, I've noticed a scratch on X's knee, how did it happen?"."It wasn't there when I dropped him off, have you not been watching him?" Is apparently not an appropriate response.
Luckily the other half deals with most of it.
I know they're covering their arses but a bit of common sense wouldn't go amiss. If there were patterns and/or more serious injuries then fair enough but they know what our kids are like because they tell me when I pick them up.
Because I had my daughter aged 6 months screaming in the car, and I knew she needed a nappy change and my wife to feed her, but my son, aged 3 was refusing to get out of the car, so I locked the door, closed the garage door and took my daughter into the house, changed her nappy, handed her to my wife (ill in bed, but still breast feeding), and went and got him from the car. Unfortunately his mood had gone from belligerent to distraught. Clearly the message I'd hoped to send him (five minutes in the dark, because you don't do what daddy needs you to do), hadn't really worked. Took a few minutes of screaming to calm him down.
Neighbour witnessed all this, and contacted social services.
Health visitor came around for a visit, and suggested I had done a perfectly acceptable and safe thing.
But the accusation was that my wife was an unfit mother. She had nothing to do with the decision making to try to show that their are consequences if you refuse to do something that needs to happen.
Strangely both children grew up into perfectly normal functional adults. I watch my son with his toddler (my grandson walked for the first time on Sunday) and he looks absolutely knackered.
ooid said:
I genuinely congratulate any of you who is planning or would plan the 2nd one. It has been the most challenging phase for us, and still is.
It took me 2 years and 2 months to think that a second one was a good idea. Instead of taking 2 years to get pregnant as with the first, it took just one night in Blackpool bed and breakfast with the first having a sleepover at my wife's sisters house.I then spent the next 18 years suggesting that a third child was a f
king stupid idea, before having the snip both of which my wife thinks were her decision. 
Davie said:
I haven't checked in here for a while. I haven't checked my last post here but it was the early days of fatherhood, the chaos, the emotions, the feeling of being lost, alone, useless and probably questioning how I'd manage.
Today... just back from Glentress running red trails with my now 6yr old little boy then home to be bossed around by my precocious 3yr old little girl, who absolutely rules the household. Wife and I are hanging on in there, now glad the kids aren't so reliant. Demanding, yes. Reliant, less so. Plus both now do school / nursery etc etc.
Reading the posts from the now new dads... it feels like a lifetime ago that that was me, but the reality is the time has flown in. My advice to new dads, don't wish the time away... don't say "It'll be easier when they're walking / talking / at school / married" Embrace your time, maximise your time as all too soon, it'll be a memory.
Stick in gents.
Yeah it goes fast.Today... just back from Glentress running red trails with my now 6yr old little boy then home to be bossed around by my precocious 3yr old little girl, who absolutely rules the household. Wife and I are hanging on in there, now glad the kids aren't so reliant. Demanding, yes. Reliant, less so. Plus both now do school / nursery etc etc.
Reading the posts from the now new dads... it feels like a lifetime ago that that was me, but the reality is the time has flown in. My advice to new dads, don't wish the time away... don't say "It'll be easier when they're walking / talking / at school / married" Embrace your time, maximise your time as all too soon, it'll be a memory.
Stick in gents.
I’ve been lucky to be around a lot with my two, maybe the odd day each week I’ve had to be out etc, but mostly around every day for 7 years… and yet it’s still utterly flown along, especially after the first 2 or 3 years it just seems to speed up.
I wouldn’t trade all that time with mine for the world.
Really gone backwards with our 22 month old now.
having to get up 2/3/4/5 times a night with him, he wakes up and sits up and wont go back to sleep until you come in and lay him down again.
He has had a chest infection but that has gone now, luckily I'm on nights next few nights WFH but still annoying having to go up to him every hour or so.
having to get up 2/3/4/5 times a night with him, he wakes up and sits up and wont go back to sleep until you come in and lay him down again.
He has had a chest infection but that has gone now, luckily I'm on nights next few nights WFH but still annoying having to go up to him every hour or so.
Lots of travelling coming up so the Bugaboo Fox is going to be partially retired for the Bugaboo Butterfly. not much available on the used market so had to buy new.
Nothing much to say at the moment but it's a bit like the YoYo and will fold into an airline overhead locker.
obviously the car boot/taxi boot space saving is massive over the fox. The fox with all its space compromises has been amazing all this time and has taken a real beating, I can't recommend the fox more highly.
Nothing much to say at the moment but it's a bit like the YoYo and will fold into an airline overhead locker.
obviously the car boot/taxi boot space saving is massive over the fox. The fox with all its space compromises has been amazing all this time and has taken a real beating, I can't recommend the fox more highly.
okgo said:
I’m so fking pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!
My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
This is a source of contention for us. My 2.5 year old is still quite insistent on being carried despite being perfectly capable of walking as much as needed. As my wife is 37 weeks now, she can't really carry him, so for bigger outings we have to either take a pram, or run the gauntlet of potentially having to handle them a long distance.king pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
parkrun is different - goes in the buggy and gets pushed round regardless. I'm on the hunt for a used double running buggy, as we won't use it long enough to justify buying new.
okgo said:
I’m so fking pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!
My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
At that age we just switched over to a mini microscooter with the pull along/carry strap - https://www.micro-scooters.co.uk/micro-eco-pull-ca...king pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
If legs get tired they can be pulled along and its so much smaller/lighter than a pushchair.
okgo said:
I’m so fking pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!
My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
I tried to do the right thing previously and took the Baby Bjorn to Manchester airport. As you don't have a pram you don't get to use the express lane by default and end up queuing with the great unwashed.king pleased I never have to use a pram again in my life!My wife is trying to get us to take one on holiday as we have a very early flight. My son will be almost 4 and I’ve told her it’s mental.
On that basis, I will be taking a pram and making him sit in it until he is 16......
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