Tell us something really trivial about your life (Vol 29)
Discussion
DickyC said:
There's a vitriolic thread in the Lounge. I was going to see if I could help by posting this:
A lesson learnt for an angry old lady
"A lesson learned by an angry old lady," sounds better to my ear. Is there any chance we could start again?
Oh, hang on, we don't know the denouement so we're not sure she did learn the lesson.
"A lesson taught to, but possibly not understood by, an angry old lady." There we go.
Here to help.
But I decided against it.
I did see that thread and my first thought was, they're as bad as each other!!! A lesson learnt for an angry old lady
"A lesson learned by an angry old lady," sounds better to my ear. Is there any chance we could start again?
Oh, hang on, we don't know the denouement so we're not sure she did learn the lesson.
"A lesson taught to, but possibly not understood by, an angry old lady." There we go.
Here to help.
But I decided against it.
DickyC said:
It's dreadful.
I wasted my bird siht in the hair gag - "It gives complete control without being greasy" - to no avail.
I'll give you some points for it I wasted my bird siht in the hair gag - "It gives complete control without being greasy" - to no avail.
Bird shat on my wife's head one day and she wailed something about "Why does this always happen to me!" etc etc.
When I said ".... because you're worth it.", I almosted winced as I could feel the mental daggers she just threw piercing my skin slowly.
carguy45 said:
DickyC said:
It's dreadful.
I wasted my bird siht in the hair gag - "It gives complete control without being greasy" - to no avail.
I'll give you some points for it I wasted my bird siht in the hair gag - "It gives complete control without being greasy" - to no avail.
Bird shat on my wife's head one day and she wailed something about "Why does this always happen to me!" etc etc.
When I said ".... because you're worth it.", I almosted winced as I could feel the mental daggers she just threw piercing my skin slowly.
are you still married to the lovely lady? Mrs Bobbers had it once, we parked at Southsea so we could walk into Gunwharf Quays, as she was paying(the machine was under a tree) she let out a squeal and started laughing she had been shat on down the side of her head and onto her shoulder, cue lots of wet wipes and lots of laughing, she's a goodun mine is, she now insists on checking for birds before paying!!!! nonsequitur said:
Haven't posted for a bit, but on my return it's as I thought. The Magnificent Seven are dominating the thread. Is it a take over? There hasn't been a fresh poster for ages. I'm concerned.
They're probably all bemused at the bewildered souls on here. We've seen off a few strays from other threads as soon as they're welcomed by the TT Massive they head for the door - a bit like unwittingly entering an asylum.
Bomma220 said:
An asylum? Blimey, I remember that. Four or five weeks it was all told.
The staff all used to wear white coats. Stark raving mad they were.
Which is exactly why you fit right in!! I don't know what the weather is doing in your neck of the woods but it's blowing a right hooly here!! The staff all used to wear white coats. Stark raving mad they were.
The remains of the gammon joint wouldn't fit the storage boxy thing so I trimmed a bit off. Then I ate the bit I trimmed off. There were only two potatoes left so I ate those too. Silly to save just two. Then I scraped out the saucepan that I used to make the mustard sauce. That was nice.
I had supper, didn't I?
I had supper, didn't I?
DickyC said:
The remains of the gammon joint wouldn't fit the storage boxy thing so I trimmed a bit off. Then I ate the bit I trimmed off. There were only two potatoes left so I ate those too. Silly to save just two. Then I scraped out the saucepan that I used to make the mustard sauce. That was nice.
I had supper, didn't I?
I guess you finger-lickin' did, Dicky! Omn Omn Omn! I had supper, didn't I?
I had no left-overs to store away, neither in the fridge nor my belly, because I had scoffed the lot earlier.
Now I have no food left: nothing at all.
Just the ingredients to make food.
I'll make some tomorrow evening. I don't fancy Battert's Dish of the Day for tomorrow's dinner. Not after seeing him wheeling that barrow of... of... err.. of 'stuff' across the courtyard to his 'prep room' earlier.
It was the bits dangling off the sides and dragging in the mud that put me off...
Did you also notice the butchers apron and the welders boots and gauntlets glenrobbo? I wouldn't normally mind the whole "bits dragging through the mud" thing but he did walk through the rose garden which had been freshly manuered, across the gravel car park and twice around the big lake, It's not the most direct route from the cold store across the small courtyard to his prep room, is it????
SpeedMattersNot said:
I've had an ache in my left thigh for a week now. It's annoying.
Only one thing for it chap I'm afraid, amputation!!!! HTH SpeedMattersNot said:
I've had an ache in my left thigh for a week now. It's annoying.
You lucky, lucky b
d! Oh, how I wish I had just the one ache!
An ache in the left thigh, you say? Wanna swap?
You could always get Battert to give you one of his 'Special Massages' in his 'prep. room'.
That would take your mind off it!
Looks like you chose the wrong place to come for advice/help/sympathy...
Bobberoo99 said:
Did you also notice the butchers apron and the welders boots and gauntlets glenrobbo? I wouldn't normally mind the whole "bits dragging through the mud" thing but he did walk through the rose garden which had been freshly manuered, across the gravel car park and twice around the big lake, It's not the most direct route from the cold store across the small courtyard to his prep room, is it????
Cold store? No no, he came from the direction of the Edited by glenrobbo on Wednesday 25th April 07:19
You're all worrying unduly. It's just Battert making preparations for the bass notes in a new and improved TT alcoholic beverage. In the early stages he will serve it as punch, then he skims off the lighter fractions for gin. As the mulch matures or 'starts to go brown' in Battertese, he can sell it as whisky and eventually, by adding a little of his secret ingredient, as rum. The proceeds go into the Towers' coffers so everyone wins. Even the local under used ambiwlans service benefits. They treat all those affected as a major incident exercise.
DickyC said:
You're all worrying unduly. It's just Battert making preparations for the bass notes in a new and improved TT alcoholic beverage. In the early stages he will serve it as punch, then he skims off the lighter fractions for gin. As the mulch matures or 'starts to go brown' in Battertese, he can sell it as whisky and eventually, by adding a little of his secret ingredient, as rum. The proceeds go into the Towers' coffers so everyone wins. Even the local under used ambiwlans service benefits. They treat all those affected as a major incident exercise.
Oh well that's ok then!! HANG ON A MINUTE!! The last time he decided to brew one of his "concoctions" didn't he manage to blow a sizeable chunk out the side of the old stables?!?!?!? Bobberoo99 said:
Oh well that's ok then!! HANG ON A MINUTE!! The last time he decided to brew one of his "concoctions" didn't he manage to blow a sizeable chunk out the side of the old stables?!?!?!?
No Bobbers, that was Bomma trying out one of the Rapiers from that batch that were past their 'sell by' date. HANG ON A MINUTE!! The last time he decided to brew one of his "concoctions" didn't he manage to blow a sizeable chunk out the side of the old stables?!?!?!? 
We can't blame Battert for everything, you know.
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