A bit council (Vol 3)
Discussion
V8mate said:
Lemming Train said:
I was in hospital yesterday and a young girl (probs 15 ish I'd say) comes into the waiting area with a few month old baby in a pram/pushchair thing and a bloke that was a spitting image of Ozzy Osbourne, sans glasses. Looked just like this but with far greasier hair. They sit down opposite and the young girl is preparing to give the baby some milk in a bottle and I heard her say "mum [wtf?], can you check the temperature is alright for him?" and hands the Ozzy Osbourne look-alike the bottle. 
It was at that point I noticed the women's shoes and it suddenly dawned on me that it was actually a woman!
The mother was sporting that the traditional council perma-scowl and then she said something to the daughter in that hoarse voice that only rough council women can do. I think they must get it from bellowing "Darrrrrrrrrrrrren! Your teaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa's ready!" every evening at 5pm whilst firing up another Lambert & Butler.
After squirting the bottle of milk on their wrists (which then ran onto the carpet) they confirmed that the temperature was fine and gave it to the baby. All was quiet up until the point where the baby had finished and then it started crying and screaming. The girl reaches down and pulls out a bag of Haribo
and starts shovelling them in the baby's gob. Unsurprisingly this didn't do much to quell the din so apparently the solution is to keep shovelling in more Haribo until it stops. Half a bag of Haribo later 
and by some miracle the baby stopped crying. Who knew about this magical Haribo solution?!
I found the whole thing quite comical but then I don't tend to frequent these types of establishment that seem to attract a disproportionate number of the lower echelons of society.
WTF? It was at that point I noticed the women's shoes and it suddenly dawned on me that it was actually a woman!The mother was sporting that the traditional council perma-scowl and then she said something to the daughter in that hoarse voice that only rough council women can do. I think they must get it from bellowing "Darrrrrrrrrrrrren! Your teaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa's ready!" every evening at 5pm whilst firing up another Lambert & Butler.
After squirting the bottle of milk on their wrists (which then ran onto the carpet) they confirmed that the temperature was fine and gave it to the baby. All was quiet up until the point where the baby had finished and then it started crying and screaming. The girl reaches down and pulls out a bag of Haribo
and starts shovelling them in the baby's gob. Unsurprisingly this didn't do much to quell the din so apparently the solution is to keep shovelling in more Haribo until it stops. Half a bag of Haribo later and by some miracle the baby stopped crying. Who knew about this magical Haribo solution?!I found the whole thing quite comical but then I don't tend to frequent these types of establishment that seem to attract a disproportionate number of the lower echelons of society.
A baby not yet weaned (no teeth?), being fed Haribo? It would just choke and die?
Europa1 said:
Gary29 said:
Hmmm might give this a whirl at 3am tonight when our 4 month old won't stop crying 
Do report back on how this goes, especially your 4 month old both during and coming down from the colossal sugar rush!Let loose my inner council at the weekend - a lad's trip to Blackpool to play poker. Too many council vignettes to share but I think my favourite was in Wetherspoons at 09:30 on Sunday morning when we were having breakfast and so was the guy on the adjacent table - except his was two pints.
Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
QuartzDad said:
Let loose my inner council at the weekend - a lad's trip to Blackpool to play poker. Too many council vignettes to share but I think my favourite was in Wetherspoons at 09:30 on Sunday morning when we were having breakfast and so was the guy on the adjacent table - except his was two pints.
Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
9:30? He must have slept in.Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
Guessing you don't get to many 'Spoonz' as that is common to all of them.
Gary29 said:
QuartzDad said:
Let loose my inner council at the weekend - a lad's trip to Blackpool to play poker. Too many council vignettes to share but I think my favourite was in Wetherspoons at 09:30 on Sunday morning when we were having breakfast and so was the guy on the adjacent table - except his was two pints.
Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
9:30? He must have slept in.Planning ahead and minimising bar waiting time - not council.
Guessing you don't get to many 'Spoonz' as that is common to all of them.
SpeckledJim said:
I for one bloody love a pint of Guinness with breakfast. Feels like a tiny little holiday. I don't care what anyone thinks, that's livin alright.
Yep, I was having breakfast in Birmingham airport the other year, catching a flight for work, so I wasn't drinking and hadn't though to. However, it was 7am and, on a table across from me was a Sikh guy, tucking into his fry up with a nice, cold pint of lager and it made me chuckle; it was one of those sights that reminds you you're in Britain. If you're on holiday, you are allowed to drink at the airport, those are the rules.Flibble said:
OpulentBob said:
I've never seen salt mined. Only harvested on drying beds (both here and in Asia).
There's one in Cheshire.https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-35322992
https://www.thetelegraphandargus.co.uk/news/173911...
ok, its sad because a 17 yr old lost his life giving it the beans on a motorbike on his hols.
but x factor star, holmewood, mass balloon release
this little spot on holmewood is quite like nothing you have ever seen in yr life. Apart from featuring on Police interceptors a lot.
or the FB video of a scrote angle grinding the lamposts down with a battery grinder, causing them to collapse on the main road.
ok, its sad because a 17 yr old lost his life giving it the beans on a motorbike on his hols.
but x factor star, holmewood, mass balloon release
this little spot on holmewood is quite like nothing you have ever seen in yr life. Apart from featuring on Police interceptors a lot.
or the FB video of a scrote angle grinding the lamposts down with a battery grinder, causing them to collapse on the main road.
alorotom said:
Europa1 said:
Gary29 said:
Hmmm might give this a whirl at 3am tonight when our 4 month old won't stop crying
Do report back on how this goes, especially your 4 month old both during and coming down from the colossal sugar rush!The nappy curl of Haribo
iwantagta said:
Not if you only feed it the rings so its got a breathing hole.
Absolutely fine that - with the added benefit that you get the fried eggs and hearts.
I impulsively bought some tangfastics off Amazon last year. Absolutely fine that - with the added benefit that you get the fried eggs and hearts.
3.2 kg of them.
I ate them all (mostly, maybe half a kilo were shared).
My teeth ached for weeks.
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