Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)

[motco]

davhill said:

If I had an iguana...



I'd call it Don...

[MartG]

My wife started her job on a cruise ship last week.
My mate asked, "How's she getting on?"
I replied, "I'm not sure, I think they use a crane."

[MartG]

[davhill]

It seems appropriate to quote Ken Dodd from about three years ago. He was doing a routine
about the meaning of initials in logos.

He started with LWt (London Weekend Television), which means, "Long wait for a titter."

And the appropriate one was KFC, "Can't find the chicken."

[MartG]

[MartG]

"I'm not totally useless - I can be used as a bad example"

[Laurel Green]

MartG said:

"I'm not totally useless - I can be used as a bad example"

I can relate to that.

[Ultra Sound Guy]

FOR SALE, VERY RARE! £150

[funkyrobot]

MartG said:

My wife started her job on a cruise ship last week.
My mate asked, "How's she getting on?"
I replied, "I'm not sure, I think they use a crane."

Yes!

[funkyrobot]

Ultra Sound Guy said:

FOR SALE, VERY RARE! £150

Yep. The chicken looks cooked.

[MartG]

[Ultra Sound Guy]

MartG said:

I got put off it when girls started using it as a 'prop' at stag shows!

[MartG]

[Robster]

[schmunk]

Robster said:

Given that Gary Larson stopped producing The Far Side cartoons in 1995...

[Frimley111R]

schmunk said:

Robster said:

Given that Gary Larson stopped producing The Far Side cartoons in 1995...

Blimey! Really?

[LoonyTunes]

Interesting fact:

The letter H looks like a Frenchman during the war.

[glenrobbo]

schmunk said:

Robster said:

Given that Gary Larson stopped producing The Far Side cartoons in 1995...

So the time machine actually works then? Cool!

[MarkwG]

glenrobbo said:

So the time machine actually works then? Cool!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Larson - interesting request to fans in the Personal section...

[Allyc85]

Haven't seen the Michelin man in a while.

Maybe he's re-tyred.