Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)
Discussion
Halmyre said:
ADEuk said:
Anal Thunderbird
Anal Prefect. Which tells you all you need to know about prefects.glenrobbo said:
Anal Prefect? Anal C-Max? Anal Zephyr Zodiac?
Nope.
But I can see how Anal Classic would be Popular.
And Anal Thunderbird would be a sight to see! :biggrin:
... Anal Edsel? scratchchin
Didn't this Ford thing start with a meme of a series of photos of Harrison Ford a while back?
He did not mention the Anal Probe for reasons of maintaining the usual high standards of decency here on PH. Nope.
But I can see how Anal Classic would be Popular.
And Anal Thunderbird would be a sight to see! :biggrin:
... Anal Edsel? scratchchin
Didn't this Ford thing start with a meme of a series of photos of Harrison Ford a while back?
Edited by glenrobbo on Thursday 14th June 09:14
The Chairman of the golf club and his wife are playing a round of golf when a streaker suddenly runs across the course, stark-naked save for a balaclava and a pair of trainers. The Chairman chuckles and says "there's a member who's not wearing proper clothing". His wife chuckles and says "he's not even a member".
Sticks. said:
Vipers said:
Guy bought new Ford Focus.
Pal says "What do you call it"
He says "Clitoris"
Pal says "Why"
He says " Because every
s got one"
When I first heard that joke it was a red XR3i. Not that it's old or anything Pal says "What do you call it"
He says "Clitoris"
Pal says "Why"
He says " Because every
s got one"
Closely followed by the hedgehog alternative
An avid golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him.
"I have some good news and some bad news," says the surgeon. "The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!"
"Oh God no!" cries the man. "My golfing is over! Please Doc, what's the good news?"
"The good news is...... I have another arm to replace it with, but it's a woman's arm and I'll need your permission before I can go ahead with the transplant."
"Go for it, doc," says the man. "As long as I can play golf again."
The operation went well and a year later the man was out on the golf-course when he bumped into the surgeon.
"Hi, how's the new arm?" asks the surgeon.
"Just great," says the golfer. "I'm playing the best golf of my life. My new arm has a much finer touch, and my putting has really improved."
"That's great," said the surgeon.
"Not only that," continued the golfer, "my handwriting has improved, I've learned how to sew my own clothes and I've even taken up painting landscapes in watercolours."
"That's unbelievable!" said the surgeon. "I'm so glad to hear the transplant was such a great success. Are you having any side effects?"
"Well, just two, said the golfer, "I have trouble parallel parking, and every time I get an erection, I also get a headache.”
"I have some good news and some bad news," says the surgeon. "The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!"
"Oh God no!" cries the man. "My golfing is over! Please Doc, what's the good news?"
"The good news is...... I have another arm to replace it with, but it's a woman's arm and I'll need your permission before I can go ahead with the transplant."
"Go for it, doc," says the man. "As long as I can play golf again."
The operation went well and a year later the man was out on the golf-course when he bumped into the surgeon.
"Hi, how's the new arm?" asks the surgeon.
"Just great," says the golfer. "I'm playing the best golf of my life. My new arm has a much finer touch, and my putting has really improved."
"That's great," said the surgeon.
"Not only that," continued the golfer, "my handwriting has improved, I've learned how to sew my own clothes and I've even taken up painting landscapes in watercolours."
"That's unbelievable!" said the surgeon. "I'm so glad to hear the transplant was such a great success. Are you having any side effects?"
"Well, just two, said the golfer, "I have trouble parallel parking, and every time I get an erection, I also get a headache.”
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