Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)
Discussion
h and a w
Who said that?
EarlOfHazard said:
davhill said:
davhill said:
A bloke received a letter demanding he went to court on a particular date at a specific time.
When he arrived, the usher gave him a drum stick and seated him at the end of the bench.
All through the proceedings, he had to watch out for the judge giving him a signal.
Every time the signal was given, he had to get up, shuffle across behind the judge's chair and tap him on the wig with the drum stick.
After an hour, he realised he'd been called for Dury duty.
Did no one get this? When he arrived, the usher gave him a drum stick and seated him at the end of the bench.
All through the proceedings, he had to watch out for the judge giving him a signal.
Every time the signal was given, he had to get up, shuffle across behind the judge's chair and tap him on the wig with the drum stick.
After an hour, he realised he'd been called for Dury duty.
He was issued with the wrong implement.
It should have been a rhythm stick.
EarlOfHazard said:
davhill said:
davhill said:
A bloke received a letter demanding he went to court on a particular date at a specific time.
When he arrived, the usher gave him a drum stick .....
..... he'd been called for Dury duty.
Did no one get this? When he arrived, the usher gave him a drum stick .....
..... he'd been called for Dury duty.
glenrobbo said:
Drum stick?
He was issued with the wrong implement.
It should have been a rhythm stick.
Urban Dictionary says...He was issued with the wrong implement.
It should have been a rhythm stick.
Top definition: Rhythm Stick
Despite previous Urban Dictionary entries, rhythm stick is cockney rhyming slang for dick.
"I can beat out a banging pulse on my rhythm stick"
OK, picture yourself at the music shop.
" I want to play my drums so can I have a pair of rhythm sticks?'
Cue a very funny look from whoever's serving..
This will only reach ex Navy chaps. So might get a few chuckles.
A young sailor is ambling through base when an RPO shouts out "COME HERE LAD"
Young sailor doubles up to the RPO and stands to attention.
The RPO says "WHATS YOUR OFFICIAL NUMBER LAD" (they always shouted)
Young lad starts to reel out his official number (which was 066229), "Ohh six si....."
RPO bellows out "THERE ARE NO OH's IN THIS NAVY THEY ARE ZERO'S, GOT THAT"
Lad says "Aye aye R P ZERO"
A young sailor is ambling through base when an RPO shouts out "COME HERE LAD"
Young sailor doubles up to the RPO and stands to attention.
The RPO says "WHATS YOUR OFFICIAL NUMBER LAD" (they always shouted)
Young lad starts to reel out his official number (which was 066229), "Ohh six si....."
RPO bellows out "THERE ARE NO OH's IN THIS NAVY THEY ARE ZERO'S, GOT THAT"
Lad says "Aye aye R P ZERO"
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