How Solid Really is Your Marriage
Discussion
GliderRider said:
If you are ever asking yourself, "What did I do wrong?" The answer could well be nothing. Some women, and I stress 'some', just regard relationships as a four year cycle. As this, albeit rather long, article says, some women enjoy getting married, but don't enjoy being married.
If either of my sons suggests to me they want to get married or buy a house with a girlfriend, I will be making them read the article first and asking them to tell me what it said.
https://mendontcry.wordpress.com/2012/10/18/rotati...
Hmmm... interviewed 123 women and 72 men - I wonder what percentage of those were happily married? If either of my sons suggests to me they want to get married or buy a house with a girlfriend, I will be making them read the article first and asking them to tell me what it said.
https://mendontcry.wordpress.com/2012/10/18/rotati...
70-75% of divorces initiated by women? Well, quite possibly, but why does that prove it's mostly their fault? Maybe it proves that the opposite is true.
I do agree though that a lot of people (and I could believe it's overwhelmingly women) seem to want the wedding more than they want the marriage.
Ari said:
Hmmm... interviewed 123 women and 72 men - I wonder what percentage of those were happily married?
70-75% of divorces initiated by women? Well, quite possibly, but why does that prove it's mostly their fault? Maybe it proves that the opposite is true.
I do agree though that a lot of people (and I could believe it's overwhelmingly women) seem to want the wedding more than they want the marriage.
Agree once all their friends start setting dates the pressure is on!70-75% of divorces initiated by women? Well, quite possibly, but why does that prove it's mostly their fault? Maybe it proves that the opposite is true.
I do agree though that a lot of people (and I could believe it's overwhelmingly women) seem to want the wedding more than they want the marriage.
That said most women just want security and fair enough
TwigtheWonderkid said:
FocusRS3 said:
My wife doesnt have mood swings fortunately
Neither does mine. She's in a bad mood constantly. 
Mine is now stuck in a bad mood all the time. The last week or so has been horrible.
Everything is my fault. I can't do anything right. I'm interfering all the time. I'm getting constant digs. She even told me at great length how much she despises one of my friends.
Marriage is fun.
Its starting to erode me and I'm beginning to give less of a s
t about her. That causes further problems.funkyrobot said:
Mine is now stuck in a bad mood all the time. The last week or so has been horrible.
Everything is my fault. I can't do anything right. I'm interfering all the time. I'm getting constant digs. She even told me at great length how much she despises one of my friends.
Marriage is fun.
Its starting to erode me and I'm beginning to give less of a s
t about her. That causes further problems.Treading on egg shells is an awful position to be in. Don’t envy you
Ari said:
Maybe he cheated on her in a dream she had - that's a valid reason apparently! 
I have tried to talk to her. Believe me I've tried. It simply doesn't work.
As for guidance, I was thinking about that this morning.
Trouble is, any time I try to talk about anything, she shuts down, wont listen and starts accusing me of getting at her.
She has been in a miserable mood for a while now. Everything is pretty much my fault. This is why I just don't bother discussing things with her anymore. I simply cannot get my point across.
As the poster mentions above, treading on egg shells is horrible. I genuinely fear what backlash is coming next. It seems I'm stuck in a cycle is miserable weekend, go back to work, miserable evening, go back to work etc.
This is a terrible thing to say, but I'm simply losing any confidence in our relationship.
We went out yesterday. Then when we got home, she blamed me for taking her out and other things. Wtf?
funkyrobot said:
I have tried to talk to her. Believe me I've tried. It simply doesn't work.
As for guidance, I was thinking about that this morning.
Trouble is, any time I try to talk about anything, she shuts down, wont listen and starts accusing me of getting at her.
She has been in a miserable mood for a while now. Everything is pretty much my fault. This is why I just don't bother discussing things with her anymore. I simply cannot get my point across.
As the poster mentions above, treading on egg shells is horrible. I genuinely fear what backlash is coming next. It seems I'm stuck in a cycle is miserable weekend, go back to work, miserable evening, go back to work etc.
This is a terrible thing to say, but I'm simply losing any confidence in our relationship.
We went out yesterday. Then when we got home, she blamed me for taking her out and other things. Wtf?
Wacky Racer said:
Ari said:
Can you sit down with her and have an adult conversation about how you feel, how she feels, how she's making you feel and how you're making her feel?
That's got to be better than just accepting the continuation of a downward spiral surely?
This.That's got to be better than just accepting the continuation of a downward spiral surely?
Very well put.
I will try again though.
FocusRS3 said:
It’s time to be frank and TELL HER how YOU feel and what it’s doing to you .
Ask her if she loves you and what she wants .
I think once you get those answers it may tell you which way you will be turning .
Good luck
Quite agree. Particular emphasis on what is it that she wants, or feels is lacking.Ask her if she loves you and what she wants .
I think once you get those answers it may tell you which way you will be turning .
Good luck
She sounds depressed and it can be very difficult to get out of that without a lot of support and understanding.
FocusRS3 said:
It’s time to be frank and TELL HER how YOU feel and what it’s doing to you .
Ask her if she loves you and what she wants .
I think once you get those answers it may tell you which way you will be turning .
Good luck
Yes, exactly this. If you can't talk with her, talk to her. To be honest, a relationship in which you cannot communicate is not a relationship so you've nothing to lose. You might fix it, but if not, it was already lost. Ask her if she loves you and what she wants .
I think once you get those answers it may tell you which way you will be turning .
Good luck
Very best of luck.
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