Things that annoy you beyond reason...(Vol 5)

Things that annoy you beyond reason...(Vol 5)

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Discussion

nonsequitur

7,553 posts

54 months

Saturday 19th January
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talksthetorque said:
People going slowly everywhere today.
40 in a 60, 22 in a clear 30 with no side roads, then crawling through the car park with loads of spaces. Getting out and ambling through town like they are in a fking garden centre.
Blocking the doorway as you can't wait any longer to spark up.
A woman creeps towards the escalator, with oncoming pedestrians, can't overtake - then puts her shopping trolley next to her on the same step, so nobody can walk up.
People stopping in the street right in front of you and holding a covnversation five wide on the pavement.

tts everywhere.
tts as far as the eye can see.
Not quite sure about the sparking up, but the rest can be attributed to ' That's Life '. Some days you are the pigeon, some days you are the statue.

talksthetorque

5,657 posts

73 months

Saturday 19th January
quotequote all
nonsequitur said:
Not quite sure about the sparking up, but the rest can be attributed to ' That's Life '. Some days you are the pigeon, some days you are the statue.
I think to be fair all this happened before I had breakfast, and that may explain why it annoyed me beyond reason.

I Love Cake

2,308 posts

109 months

Saturday 19th January
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People who point at each other in photos.

Hackney

5,473 posts

146 months

Sunday 20th January
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Frank7 said:
Hackney said:
Cockerneea annoy me beyond reason because of things like this.
On the one aynd they’ll towk aw geezah and pronounce Harris as ‘arris. But then in the same breff will pronounce glass to rhyme with arse.

It’s why anyone from “daarn saaarf” shouldn’t be allowed to sing at football matches.
“Who’s the bar-stard in the black?” indeed.
Colour me mildly confused here, I’m a Londoner, born within the sound of Bow Bells, lived here all my life, at present in Rotherhithe.
I say glass almost to rhyme with arse, maybe not glarse, perhaps glahss, should I say it like an American, glass, rhyming with ass?
Maybe I need to have my hearing checked, but I can’t recall ever hearing “sarf.”
To me I hear, and think that I also say, “souf”, or “sowf.”
As for bar-stard, I say it as bahstuhd, or barstuhd, not claiming to be right, just telling you how I say it.
The short A sound glass is not an Americanism it’s half the U.K.

What I’m saying is that to people from birth of London there’s a dichotomy between the working class sounding geezer cockernee sound of “London” and those same people pronouncing words that have a short sharp A sound (garage, Bath, bd, glass) with a longer glaaarse, baaarth, garaaarge sound which, to us, sounds posh.

davhill

3,377 posts

122 months

Sunday 20th January
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It's an interesting one.

I'm from Derbyshire (New Mills) and it was always the short 'a' that was used there.
If Derbyshire rhyming slang existed, one would retire to the bathroom
for a nice wheat and chaff.

Hoiwever, take the word vase. In Yank, it's 'vays', in English, it's 'varrrs'.
But in Derbyshire, it was always 'vorrs'. That's what I was taught and it may still be this.

My ex was born on the South side of Manchester and her mum tried to bring up
her and her sibings to be 'U' and opposed to non-U.
Her exship would always have a go at me when I used the word, 'tongue'. I pronounce it
'tong'. to rhyme with Big Ben's 'bong. But she said, 'tung', to rhyme with 'dung'.

The solution was to aks a simple question: "Did you have a nice lie down on the chaise lung?"

It was the same when I was buying a VW Scirocco. The salesman pronounced it 'Shirocco', which is correct.
I still couldn't resist asking to borrow a pair of 'shissors.'


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Clockwork Cupcake

58,422 posts

210 months

Sunday 20th January
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This thread annoys me beyond reason silly

Frank7

2,270 posts

25 months

Sunday 20th January
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davhill said:
It's an interesting one.

I'm from Derbyshire (New Mills) and it was always the short 'a' that was used there.
If Derbyshire rhyming slang existed, one would retire to the bathroom
for a nice wheat and chaff.

Hoiwever, take the word vase. In Yank, it's 'vays', in English, it's 'varrrs'.
But in Derbyshire, it was always 'vorrs'. That's what I was taught and it may still be this.

My ex was born on the South side of Manchester and her mum tried to bring up
her and her sibings to be 'U' and opposed to non-U.
Her exship would always have a go at me when I used the word, 'tongue'. I pronounce it
'tong'. to rhyme with Big Ben's 'bong. But she said, 'tung', to rhyme with 'dung'.

The solution was to aks a simple question: "Did you have a nice lie down on the chaise lung?"

It was the same when I was buying a VW Scirocco. The salesman pronounced it 'Shirocco', which is correct.
I still couldn't resist asking to borrow a pair of 'shissors.'
I enjoyed your post, AND got an education of sorts, I take your point on the U.S. vase, I would have said that they say vaze, but vays says it their way too.
I say vaze, but STRICTLY to wind my wife up, I totally accept that over here it’s vahs, or vahze.
I’ll also enter someone’s mobile number in my phone as Dave cell, not Dave mobile, this is calculated to send my wife through the roof if she sees it on the screen!
Got to go with your ex on tongue, that’s tung all day long down here, but I now learn that I’ve been saying Scirocco the wrong way, I think though, that if I started to say Shirocco instead of Skirocco in Bermondsey, I’d hear, “Shirocco? Shirocco? Are you f**king sure?”
ARE YOU SURE? is an expression of incredulity down here.

daqinggegg

156 posts

67 months

Sunday 20th January
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The number of times I see parents out with children, and the parents are on their mobile devices without engaging with children is just Shocking to me. What example are you setting.

Robbo 27

2,155 posts

37 months

Sunday 20th January
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daqinggegg said:
The number of times I see parents out with children, and the parents are on their mobile devices without engaging with children is just Shocking to me. What example are you setting.
Agree with that one 100%. Parents constantly on their phone whilst they take their children to the park, why not talk to your damn kids instead.




SGirl

7,742 posts

199 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
daqinggegg said:
The number of times I see parents out with children, and the parents are on their mobile devices without engaging with children is just Shocking to me. What example are you setting.
There's an ad on bus shelters round here (don't know whether it's nationwide), which shows a pic of a mother and baby. Mother is clutching her phone and the caption is something along the lines of "I can multitask". Drives me round the bend every time I see it.

davhill

3,377 posts

122 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
Frank7 said:
Snip...

I think though, that if I started to say Shirocco instead of Skirocco in Bermondsey, I’d hear, “Shirocco? Shirocco? Are you f**king sure?”
ARE YOU SURE? is an expression of incredulity down here.
Skirocco? That's a new one on me!
I used to say Sirocco, not Sir Rocco like a knight - just with a silent C in the first, short syllable.

You have me wondering now. When you buy some nice perfume for your wife, what do you say? "Here's a bottle of skent."?

Sorry, pronunciation Nazi mode kicked in there.

Tyre Tread

9,039 posts

154 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
davhill said:
Sorry, pronunciation Nazi mode kicked in there.
Pronunciation you say?
I'll just leave this here but suggest you get someone else to read it out load for best comedic effect:

English is Tough Stuff

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it's written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation's OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.

Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.

Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.

Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.

Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.

Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.

Pronunciation -- think of Psyche!
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won't it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.

Finally, which rhymes with enough–
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give it up!!!

gothatway

1,702 posts

108 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
Tyre Tread said:
Pronunciation you say?
I'll just leave this here but suggest you get someone else to read it out load for best comedic effect:

English is Tough Stuff

...
Brililant !

davhill

3,377 posts

122 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
Tyre Tread said:
Snip...

Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give it up!!!
You typed all that lot??
Bet it tuke a while.

Frank7

2,270 posts

25 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
davhill said:
Frank7 said:
Snip...

I think though, that if I started to say Shirocco instead of Skirocco in Bermondsey, I’d hear, “Shirocco? Shirocco? Are you f**king sure?”
ARE YOU SURE? is an expression of incredulity down here.
Skirocco? That's a new one on me!
I used to say Sirocco, not Sir Rocco like a knight - just with a silent C in the first, short syllable.

You have me wondering now. When you buy some nice perfume for your wife, what do you say? "Here's a bottle of skent."?

Sorry, pronunciation Nazi mode kicked in there.
No need for sorry, you’re entitled to query my pronunciation.
I wouldn’t say skent, if I said the word at all, I’d say it as sent.
Actually, I got her some perfume for Christmas, I think that I just said, “Here you go Red, Merry Christmas.”
Hands up, I’ve been been way off track with Scirocco, and thinking I’d get some back up, I wrote it down, and asked my wife how she’d say it, doh! she mulled it over, then said, Sirrocco, which was closer to Shirocco, than my Skirocco!
I then told her that it was actually Shirocco, she said, “Shirocco? Are you SURE?”
Can’t win, no wonder I get things wrong!

nonsequitur

7,553 posts

54 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
talksthetorque said:
nonsequitur said:
Not quite sure about the sparking up, but the rest can be attributed to ' That's Life '. Some days you are the pigeon, some days you are the statue.
I think to be fair all this happened before I had breakfast, and that may explain why it annoyed me beyond reason.
What you need is three Shredded Wheat.yum Guaranteed to prevent anything beyond reason.

Europa1

7,460 posts

126 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
davhill said:
It's an interesting one.

I'm from Derbyshire (New Mills) and it was always the short 'a' that was used there.
If Derbyshire rhyming slang existed, one would retire to the bathroom
for a nice wheat and chaff.

Hoiwever, take the word vase. In Yank, it's 'vays', in English, it's 'varrrs'.
But in Derbyshire, it was always 'vorrs'. That's what I was taught and it may still be this.

My ex was born on the South side of Manchester and her mum tried to bring up
her and her sibings to be 'U' and opposed to non-U.
Her exship would always have a go at me when I used the word, 'tongue'. I pronounce it
'tong'. to rhyme with Big Ben's 'bong. But she said, 'tung', to rhyme with 'dung'.

The solution was to aks a simple question: "Did you have a nice lie down on the chaise lung?"
Your solution annoys me beyond reason. "Chaise longue" is a French expression; tongue is an English word. I'm with your ex on this one.

RizzoTheRat

17,537 posts

130 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
Rail replacement buses! Just spent 25 mins standing in a queue at 2 degrees and then when I finally got on the bus, someone behind me was noisily eating fried food and the stinking out the bus.

Antony Moxey

4,336 posts

157 months

Sunday 20th January
quotequote all
Buskers. Just been for a weekend in London to see a show - every corner you turn there’s some skinny tt shrilling his was through a ropey Tom Odell or Ed Sheehan cover on a tinny guitar. Your suffering of this aural raping is compounded by the idiot audience blocking the thoroughfare encouraging these screechers meaning you struggle to get past and back to the sanctuary of traffic noise.

The sooner these ‘street entertainers’ are locked up for crimes against entertainment and our teeth return from the edge they’re hanging from the better. bds.

Edited by Antony Moxey on Monday 21st January 09:48

talksthetorque

5,657 posts

73 months

Monday 21st January
quotequote all
Europa1 said:
Your solution annoys me beyond reason. "Chaise longue" is a French expression; tongue is an English word. I'm with your ex on this one.
Amusingly the french for "tongue" is "langue" - pronounced "long"

jester