Modern toilets cannot cope
Discussion
Today I had a go on the bog of one of those brand new Great Western electric trains.
It was like an aeroplane bog and had a laughably small orifice! It couldn't and didn't cope at all well. A massive stripe was left up the back of the stainless steel pan despite flushing several times. A very narrow space as well.
All push buttons for the flush, the soap, the water and the hand dryer. Obviously the hand washer thing was separate to the bog.
It was like an aeroplane bog and had a laughably small orifice! It couldn't and didn't cope at all well. A massive stripe was left up the back of the stainless steel pan despite flushing several times. A very narrow space as well.
All push buttons for the flush, the soap, the water and the hand dryer. Obviously the hand washer thing was separate to the bog.
We got a new toilet for downstairs during our refit, the builder who was installing it expressed his doubt as to whether it could deal with solids, he was absolutely right, no matter what you do you leave a stripe, even with a modest deposit, you end up gingerly trying to angle and slow progress, feeling like a continental coach driver threading a seventy seater through a small fishing village, only with less success.
Integroo said:
colin_p said:
In the olden days a proper bog would have a large splashdown area minimising pan stripe'age, would have a cistern with a goodly amount of water and the best ones would have a cistern at eye level with a chain on the side which really had oomph. More often than not having crap was flush and go affair.
I think toilet design was handed over to women in about 1995 as they are simply cannot cope anymore. Instead of having a large splashdown area they have a shelf with a tiny splasdown spot with little or no capacity. Today I made a deposit on one such bog and managed to break the surface of the water which was a quite pleasing accomplishment despite the crap crapper.
Flushing. I know it is all about saving water but if you have to flush the damned thing three or four times it really defeats the object of the exercise, not to mention the time wasted waiting for the damned thing to fill back up with water. They also have a poor distribution of water around the pan which means more brushing. On an old bog, no matter how large a flock of starlings was unleashed, were washed away and stripe'age was minimal.
I of course blame the EU for this (issueing some Red Dwarf Space Corps type directive about toilets, probably) but soon we will be able to sort out our own s**t once again. I cannot wait.
Blaming women and the EU without any evidence whatsoever. You sound pleasant.I think toilet design was handed over to women in about 1995 as they are simply cannot cope anymore. Instead of having a large splashdown area they have a shelf with a tiny splasdown spot with little or no capacity. Today I made a deposit on one such bog and managed to break the surface of the water which was a quite pleasing accomplishment despite the crap crapper.
Flushing. I know it is all about saving water but if you have to flush the damned thing three or four times it really defeats the object of the exercise, not to mention the time wasted waiting for the damned thing to fill back up with water. They also have a poor distribution of water around the pan which means more brushing. On an old bog, no matter how large a flock of starlings was unleashed, were washed away and stripe'age was minimal.
I of course blame the EU for this (issueing some Red Dwarf Space Corps type directive about toilets, probably) but soon we will be able to sort out our own s**t once again. I cannot wait.
te. 
Stayed at a hotel recently and all the loo's must have been designed my a woman. The back bit where the water sits was more than adequate but at the front the loo had a shelf which meant all yer dangly bits would touch the porcelain when sitting on it.
T'was really disconcerting knowing what ones todger was touching to the point you had to sit there with one leg raised to give clearance. Then on course at the other end you didn't have a truly vertical exit which made it all a bit messy. Ended up using the hotel next door every morning.
T'was really disconcerting knowing what ones todger was touching to the point you had to sit there with one leg raised to give clearance. Then on course at the other end you didn't have a truly vertical exit which made it all a bit messy. Ended up using the hotel next door every morning.
Harry H said:
Stayed at a hotel recently and all the loo's must have been designed my a woman. The back bit where the water sits was more than adequate but at the front the loo had a shelf which meant all yer dangly bits would touch the porcelain when sitting on it.
T'was really disconcerting knowing what ones todger was touching to the point you had to sit there with one leg raised to give clearance. Then on course at the other end you didn't have a truly vertical exit which made it all a bit messy. Ended up using the hotel next door every morning.
Worst "I'm an old man, check out my clockweights" post ever T'was really disconcerting knowing what ones todger was touching to the point you had to sit there with one leg raised to give clearance. Then on course at the other end you didn't have a truly vertical exit which made it all a bit messy. Ended up using the hotel next door every morning.
Harry H said:
Stayed at a hotel recently and all the loo's must have been designed my a woman. The back bit where the water sits was more than adequate but at the front the loo had a shelf which meant all yer dangly bits would touch the porcelain when sitting on it.
American toilets are worse. Some places keep the water level so high that your love spuds are getting wet. I'm trying to lay some cable, not wash my todger.
Cardinal Hips said:
/\ That toilet looks like it was designed to give a 100% chance of a "Neptune's Kiss".
And a high probability of there being a "Mermaids tail" where said deposit breaks the surface of the water after landing and having carried out the "Neptunes kiss".wildoliver said:
We are toilet shopping at the moment. Sarah thinks I've lost my mind with the sit test and looking at drop Vs opening size and looking to see how well flowed the passage is.
She puts up with so much....
To test accurately in a showroom you'd have to sellotape a bit of string to your trousers with a plumb bob on the end and wiggle about. Even then, just like the real thing, it could be a bit hit and miss.She puts up with so much....
motco said:
I encountered this one recently. The water area is tiny, the drop long, and there's a protrusion in the line of fire. What are the chances of avoiding a ricochet at the very least?
Ours are like that, but the in goal area is even further back. You have to just go on the pitch and then worry about getting it over the line afterwards. And my wife keeps hiding the toilet brushes so our toddlers don't get hold of them.I convinced myself I had the answer, but ended up not accomplishing anything more than literally flushing Rain-X down the toilet.
0000 said:
motco said:
I encountered this one recently. The water area is tiny, the drop long, and there's a protrusion in the line of fire. What are the chances of avoiding a ricochet at the very least?
Ours are like that, but the in goal area is even further back. You have to just go on the pitch and then worry about getting it over the line afterwards. And my wife keeps hiding the toilet brushes so our toddlers don't get hold of them.I convinced myself I had the answer, but ended up not accomplishing anything more than literally flushing Rain-X down the toilet.
I've tried fashioning a landing pad out of bog roll to alleviate stripeage but it didn't work very well. To do that properly you'd need to use a lot of carefully laid out paper. Quicker to just brush it afterwards.
I'd still really like to get a proper old fashioned bog again, not these silly things that have been messed about with by feminist EU toilet comittee. Paid too much and they really don't know their s**t.
I'd still really like to get a proper old fashioned bog again, not these silly things that have been messed about with by feminist EU toilet comittee. Paid too much and they really don't know their s**t.
This is whats needed https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Old-Overhead-Toilet-Cis...
One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
hoagypubdog said:
This is whats needed https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Old-Overhead-Toilet-Cis...
One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
I have one that looks just like that. It flushes with the force of Niagra Falls. However, it’s all about the pan design. Klingons every time with ours.One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
hoagypubdog said:
This is whats needed https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Old-Overhead-Toilet-Cis...
One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
There's one in my brother's Victorian house like this. There are only 3 or 4 people on the world that seem to have the knack of flushing it. No spares available for the innards. So, when it flushes it'll clear a small child - but generally it's a fetid mess and you have to ask a family member to do their magic.One of my customers still has one in his outside loo, nothing gets left behind.
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