Tell us Something Really Trivial about your Life (VOL 30)

[Timmy45]

I have just invested in a new state of the art mole trap. I shall be deploying it alongside a scissor trap, and a traditional tunnel trap. May the best trap win. I shall report back on trials results to the forum.

[Bomma220]

Pericoloso said:

I've had to MTFU a bit,well quite a lot actually ,and booked next road trip.

I've reverted to plan B,didn't want to pay €100s in tolls,so LM Classic is out,boo .

Other stuff is in.....YAY.....

Are you at liberty to divulge any details of the trip or is it still Classified?

[Bomma220]

Mole trap?

[Timmy45]

Bomma220 said:

Mole trap?

Yes. A trap, for moles. Irritatingly that's what we have to use in the UK. In the US I would be able to purchase a semi automatic assault rifle with an extra large capacity magazine and a bump stock to take care of them. But no over here we live in a left wing nanny state where that kind of personal freedom isn't allowed.

[Pericoloso]

Bomma220 said:

Are you at liberty to divulge any details of the trip or is it still Classified?

Secret squirrel.

[nonsequitur]

DickyC said:

But, there again, Chas'n'Dave did open for Led Zeppelin at Knebworth in 1979. Ridiculed by many but, in would seem, respected in the music industry.

I believe that they played as their last song a Zepp tribute, ' Stairway to Sainsbury's '.

[nonsequitur]

Timmy45 said:

I have just invested in a new state of the art mole trap. I shall be deploying it alongside a scissor trap, and a traditional tunnel trap. May the best trap win. I shall report back on trials results to the forum.

Thick bleach down the tunnel works well. Drives them next door.

[Dibble]

Gah, all this talk of road trips is making me jealous.

I might climb the church tower over at Trivington Manga (that’s the Japanese comic theme park just outside Trivington Magna) and start taking pot shots with a high velocity hunting rifle.

The only flaws I can see in this plan are the lack of a high velocity hunting rifle and only being able to manage five or so steps currently, which isn’t really going to get me to the ideal sniping level in the church tower belfry.

Actually, I think it’s a spire rather than a tower, but it’s difficult to tell with these Buddhist temples at St Asahi of Nissan Qashqai.

I might have to hunt out some of Bobberoo99’s spherical milling suggestions to calm me down (the iPad just autocorrected “milling” to “killing”. Talk about subliminal influence...)

[DickyC]

Dibble said:

Gah, all this talk of road trips is making me jealous.

I might climb the church tower over at Trivington Manga (that’s the Japanese comic theme park just outside Trivington Magna) and start taking pot shots with a high velocity hunting rifle.

The only flaws I can see in this plan are the lack of a high velocity hunting rifle and only being able to manage five or so steps currently, which isn’t really going to get me to the ideal sniping level in the church tower belfry.

Actually, I think it’s a spire rather than a tower, but it’s difficult to tell with these Buddhist temples at St Asahi of Nissan Qashqai.

I might have to hunt out some of Bobberoo99’s spherical milling suggestions to calm me down (the iPad just autocorrected “milling” to “killing”. Talk about subliminal influence...)

Mobility trouble? Never fear, Battert's here with a Bosun's Chair and grappling iron and cord firing mortar. He'll have you up the spire in no time.

[DickyC]

nonsequitur said:

I believe that they played as their last song a Zepp tribute, ' Stairway to Sainsbury's '.

You see? You can do it.

[Timmy45]

nonsequitur said:

Timmy45 said:

I have just invested in a new state of the art mole trap. I shall be deploying it alongside a scissor trap, and a traditional tunnel trap. May the best trap win. I shall report back on trials results to the forum.

Thick bleach down the tunnel works well. Drives them next door.

Next doors quite a long way. I'd need a large tanker full of bleach and me turning half the valley peroxide blonde is bound to upset the local greenies.

[Bobberoo99]

Dibble said:

Gah, all this talk of road trips is making me jealous.

I might climb the church tower over at Trivington Manga (that’s the Japanese comic theme park just outside Trivington Magna) and start taking pot shots with a high velocity hunting rifle.

The only flaws I can see in this plan are the lack of a high velocity hunting rifle and only being able to manage five or so steps currently, which isn’t really going to get me to the ideal sniping level in the church tower belfry.

Actually, I think it’s a spire rather than a tower, but it’s difficult to tell with these Buddhist temples at St Asahi of Nissan Qashqai.

I might have to hunt out some of Bobberoo99’s spherical milling suggestions to calm me down (the iPad just autocorrected “milling” to “killing”. Talk about subliminal influence...)

You see!!! It's subliminal messages all the time!!! Kill them, kill them ALL!!!! That's what the voices in my head say over and over AND OVER!!!








I'm sorry I appear to have had one of my little episodes, don't worry it's passed now, you can come out now.......guys?...............I say chaps????

[Bobberoo99]

I hate to ask this chaps, but why is Dibble swinging from a makeshift bosuns chair on the side of the Trivton Magna church steeple? More to the point why is Battert using the Fordson to pull him up?????

[DickyC]

The Fordson? Not twelve good men and Trew from the armaments counter at the Co-op as instructed? Call him back immediately. No, wait. Have him tie off the Bosun's chair and then come back.

[Bobberoo99]

DickyC said:

The Fordson? Not twelve good men and Trew from the armaments counter at the Co-op as instructed? Call him back immediately. No, wait. Have him tie off the Bosun's chair and then come back.

Um, I don't quite know how to put this but, before I could tell him to tie off the bosuns chair he made a beeline for the main house, I think Dibble's ok but he appears to be wedged in the block and tackle attached to the grappling hook embedded in the roof of the church steeple, he looks ok, but he's making some strange noises!!!!

[DickyC]

Could we set up a parallel arrangement to keep him fed and watered?

[Bobberoo99]

Well I think it's possible, but couldn't we just rig up a large catapult and fire provisions at/to/near him, I mean his hands are free so catching it's not an issue!!!

[Bomma220]

I'm getting an overwhelming feeling of deja vu with this church business.
If I close my eyes all I can see is a bloody windmill...

[DickyC]

Both Trivton Mill and Trivton Church were the work of Christopher Wren from his experiments with hallucinogens phase. This explains the pointy top to the mill and the sermon on the grindstone.

[Bobberoo99]

It also explains why the church steeple is spiralised and the gargoyles look stoned!!!!
Dibble's stopped making strange noises and is just gently swinging to and fro, I guess the action is quite calming but it's going to play havoc with his aim!!!