Discussion
Apparently in the Windsor Castle visitors book, an American visitor wrote;
Fantastic building.... but why did they build it so close to the airport.
At a conference meeting, somebody pointed out a spelling mistake.
The reply was... “OK, BUT HOW MANY HAVE I SPELT RIGHT”.
That person was then made to get up & count the words on the flip chart.
( Hence... a very quiet person for the remainder of the meeting)
Fantastic building.... but why did they build it so close to the airport.
At a conference meeting, somebody pointed out a spelling mistake.
The reply was... “OK, BUT HOW MANY HAVE I SPELT RIGHT”.
That person was then made to get up & count the words on the flip chart.
( Hence... a very quiet person for the remainder of the meeting)
Edited by Milkyway on Wednesday 25th August 16:54
Edited by Milkyway on Wednesday 25th August 16:56
DodgyGeezer said:
Frimley111R said:
From a clip of Blakes 7 I saw at the weekend:
Avon: Shut up Villa
Villa: I am entitled to my opinion
Avon: Yes, but its your assumption that we are also entitled to it that is irritating
Avon: Shut up Villa
Villa: I am entitled to my opinion
Avon: Yes, but its your assumption that we are also entitled to it that is irritating
One of my faves is from the Marx Bros. film 'Duck Soup'.
Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx) is made president/dictator of Freedonia
and he declares war on neighbouring Sylvania over an insult made to his love interest.
A council of war is held, with the military leaders present and the wonderfully patrician
Margaret Dumont.
"Remember,"says Groucho, "we're fighting for this lady's honour...which is more than she ever did!"
Just how Ms. Dumont managed to perform without cracking up completely is an eternal mystery.
Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx) is made president/dictator of Freedonia
and he declares war on neighbouring Sylvania over an insult made to his love interest.
A council of war is held, with the military leaders present and the wonderfully patrician
Margaret Dumont.
"Remember,"says Groucho, "we're fighting for this lady's honour...which is more than she ever did!"
Just how Ms. Dumont managed to perform without cracking up completely is an eternal mystery.
I use the 'dog on a nail' thing when colleagues are moaning about work/wages/etc - It's more of a short story than a quote, but found it really useful.
Man walking past a house and hears a dog yelping
Man walks up to the house and sees a dog, laying on the wooden front porch, wailing and crying
Man knocks on the door to speak to the owner..
Owner comes to the door.. can i help you?
Man - did you know your dog is moaning, wailing and crying?
Owner - oh yes, he's laying on a nail.
Man - a nail? Oh my god, why doesn't he move?
Owner - well, it's obviously not hurting enough.
Man walking past a house and hears a dog yelping
Man walks up to the house and sees a dog, laying on the wooden front porch, wailing and crying
Man knocks on the door to speak to the owner..
Owner comes to the door.. can i help you?
Man - did you know your dog is moaning, wailing and crying?
Owner - oh yes, he's laying on a nail.
Man - a nail? Oh my god, why doesn't he move?
Owner - well, it's obviously not hurting enough.
Pixelpeep 135 said:
I use the 'dog on a nail' thing when colleagues are moaning about work/wages/etc - It's more of a short story than a quote, but found it really useful.
Man walking past a house and hears a dog yelping
Man walks up to the house and sees a dog, laying on the wooden front porch, wailing and crying
Man knocks on the door to speak to the owner..
Owner comes to the door.. can i help you?
Man - did you know your dog is moaning, wailing and crying?
Owner - oh yes, he's laying on a nail.
Man - a nail? Oh my god, why doesn't he move?
Owner - well, it's obviously not hurting enough.
Bit cruel that. I know one that works for the unemployable. Man walking past a house and hears a dog yelping
Man walks up to the house and sees a dog, laying on the wooden front porch, wailing and crying
Man knocks on the door to speak to the owner..
Owner comes to the door.. can i help you?
Man - did you know your dog is moaning, wailing and crying?
Owner - oh yes, he's laying on a nail.
Man - a nail? Oh my god, why doesn't he move?
Owner - well, it's obviously not hurting enough.
Hound dog howlin' all forlorn,
saddest dog that ever was born.
He's howlin' 'cos he sittin' on a thorn,
An he's too darn lazy to move over.
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