Things you have overhead but shouldn't have...

[paua]

matrignano said:

Frank please get a new hobby that doesn’t involve PH!
Your faux ( “mytho” in French) worldly tales are getting tedious.

I quite enjoy his anecdotes.
As you were, Frank.

[mattyn1]

ashleyman said:

Not that I remember. I kinda just got on with my journey home and tried to forget it. Threads like this always make me remember it like it was yesterday.

We were stuck in traffic just off Hyde Park, it sounds so cliché, but the guy was dressed smartly, was wearing driving gloves and was clean shaven with short hair. Car was black, perhaps an F-Type? I'm not sure if they were even out then. I was just casually glancing around and noticed him fiddling with his glovebox so kinda just stared and then saw the gun, magazine and suppressor.

That's what made it weird, it wasn't your average chav with a gun or wannabe gangster, he looked like he was straight out a movie set.

Some won't believe me but honestly this happened exactly as I describe. I remember going round the roundabout with the Wellington Arch and down towards The Grosvenor. I just carried on South and went home like I'd seen nothing.

1996. Detroit! We had friends who lived just north of the city so we had taken the opportunity to visit and see that bit of America. We had been to visit the Ford Museum - on the way back going north on the highway. Now this was before sat nav etc, so had written directions which the mrs was navigating with. On the radio, a newsflash. There has been a armed robbery at such and such bank and the perps were headed north on highway blah de blah. Two policemen shot at such and such exit (I cannot remember the terminology) and were continuing north shooting at the police. Public urged to stay away and avoid.


At this point my mrs says - that is our highway - and we have just been past that junction - I mean just!! She was quite panicky - not as much as I was when I happened to look in my mirrors and could see, in the fading dusk, what must have been gun flashes behind me! Putting two and two together the gun fight was rapidly approaching our rear!! Luckily, there was immediately an exit on our right - we darted straight down it as the car chase/gun fight screamed past.


I never did tell her what had actually happened!! She never mentioned it and I don't think she quite realised as she just bked me for taking the wrong exit!!!

[anonymous-user]

SCEtoAUX said:

eBay is your friend here.

That reminds me of the time I was at a friend's house for a party. He was playing music from his laptop so a couple of us had a look what music he had, which then turned into a search for pics. We soon found lot's of pics of obviously used underwear and some pics of his wife wearing them. Turned out they had quite a lucrative sideline flogging 2nd hand pants

[anonymous-user]

paua said:

matrignano said:

Frank please get a new hobby that doesn’t involve PH!
Your faux ( “mytho” in French) worldly tales are getting tedious.

I quite enjoy his anecdotes.
As you were, Frank.

Anecdote: a short amusing or interesting story about a real incident or person

He is one of PH's resident fantasists. A good one, and entertaining, but true? Nope.

[alorotom]

OpulentBob said:

paua said:

matrignano said:

Frank please get a new hobby that doesn’t involve PH!
Your faux ( “mytho” in French) worldly tales are getting tedious.

I quite enjoy his anecdotes.
As you were, Frank.

Anecdote: a short amusing or interesting story about a real incident or person

He is one of PH's resident fantasists. A good one, and entertaining, but true? Nope.

You’re in for it now, he’s going to throw his keys at his Mrs and flounce off for a taxi

[ozzuk]

PixelpeepS3 said:

Seen something i shouldn't have..

Back when i was 13/14 i used to borrow the odd VHS tape from the 'upstairs' collection and take them round a mates who's parents seemed never to be in.

One Friday we had a 4 pack of tenants super between 3 of us, i brought the tape.

Everyone sat down and i (as usual) bunged the tape of the week into the machine, pressed play and turned round to return to the sofa to watch with the rest.

as i'm walking back i catch a glimpse of my mates face which comprised of wide eyes and an evil smile.

I thought i must have picked a particularly kinky tape this time.

I turned round to see, and it was my mum and dad at it. Mum was on all fours.

I'm fast approaching 50 now and its one image i will NEVER be able to get out of my head!

Did you watch the whole video...

[arfursleep]

Shakermaker said:

arfursleep said:

Two women on a train discussing how to smuggle phones/drugs etc into prison for their boyfriends.

One of them had been doing it for a while by the sounds of it and was giving the newbie tips

They didn't seem to care that i was there - they'd seen me get on the train and sit behind them

Can you give us some context as to why they would care - are you an obvious police officer, prison officer or similar?

Maybe i'm naive but i'd always assumed that discussions about committed and committing illegal activities would be conducted behind closed doors / in private / at least at a whisper, not openly on the 16:54 from Redditch to Birmingham New Street...

I of course could have been off-duty police/prison officer or plain clothes police etc.

[bristolracer]

arfursleep said:

Shakermaker said:

arfursleep said:

Two women on a train discussing how to smuggle phones/drugs etc into prison for their boyfriends.

One of them had been doing it for a while by the sounds of it and was giving the newbie tips

They didn't seem to care that i was there - they'd seen me get on the train and sit behind them

Can you give us some context as to why they would care - are you an obvious police officer, prison officer or similar?

Maybe i'm naive but i'd always assumed that discussions about committed and committing illegal activities would be conducted behind closed doors / in private / at least at a whisper, not openly on the 16:54 from Redditch to Birmingham New Street...

I of course could have been off-duty police/prison officer or plain clothes police etc.

If the boyfriends in chokey were stupid enough to get caught,I cannot imagine the girlfriends are that much brighter.

[talksthetorque]

paua said:

matrignano said:

Frank please get a new hobby that doesn’t involve PH!
Your faux ( “mytho” in French) worldly tales are getting tedious.

I quite enjoy his anecdotes.
As you were, Frank.

Agreed.
From reading his previous anecdotes over the last few months, this is exactly something Frank would have done.

[Abbott]

Astacus said:

geeks said:

Have you ever been in a French Taxi? It’s terrifying at the best of times, half the time you are lucky if they actually stop the car for to get out

Similar experience here. Spent an enjoyable hours in a French taxi discussing why it wasn't my personal fault that the English bumped off Joan of Arc.

ETA in French...Obvs

I have that thrown at me quite often. The simple answer is it was the Bishop of Beauvais that ordered the torching JdA but he couldnt find any frenchmen that would do it so we stepped in. That is usually enough to get the ignorant ones to back off. A bit more tricky if someone really knows the history.

[Smitters]

Sitting at the kitchen window in Uni in my flat on the second floor, having a ciggie, when two lasses walk past on their way out for the night.

Rather like an obscene fire engine going past, we got;

"mumble, mumble, mumble, giggle, mumble, and then I asked him to tongue my trench, giggle, mumble, mumble mumble... "

20 years ago. Still makes me chuckle.

[Spanglepants]

Had a meet up with some friends recently and we were all taking group photos. Took my mates phone to do the honours and not being used to an iPhone pressed something or other and ended up in the gallery instead of camera to be confronted by close up photos of his missus bits, not a pretty sight.

Years ago sent a jokey saucy text to my ex wife. Basically saying i had green fingers and was going to cultivate her garden of love ( yeah i know..)
Had friends come up from London and their young niece was bored . Let her play games on your phone ex said to me. A while later i get a phone call from the young girls Aunt in London asking what the hell was i on about? The girl had somehow forwarded the text to her Aunt.

Probably get criticised for this one but was in a shop and the owner was ranting about wanting to cut someone up ( in front of a few customers as well) Young lad leant over the counter and whispered something to him. Lad left the shop i walked out behind him. Our cars are parked nose to nose outside. As I'm getting in i see him reach under the dash and pull out a huge knife, wrap a cloth around it and take it back inside. No reports of anything so i guess just hard talk?

[horsemeatscandal]

Remember being sat behind someone on a pretty busy train. Gets his tablet out and starts watching (very) hardcore porn. Funny thing was, he was watching each one for a few seconds, then on to the next one is his seemingly large library. Like he was checking they were all there and accounted for or something. Didn’t even put the bloody thing away when they checked his ticket.

Not that odd compared to some of the stories on here (imagine seeing your own mother in a homemade bluey), but just one that I remember from recently.

[MrJuice]

A good friend wanted to show me a picture of something. Can't remember what it was but it must have been pretty benign. Out comes his phone, into the gallery and he starts scrolling. He must have had hundreds of porn videos. He didn't attempt to hide them or tilt the phone away from me but I'd still prefer not to know what he gets up to in his own time

[anonymous-user]

Sat in a meeting booth waiting for a conference call to start, I overheard the HR witches in the next booth discussing who should go on the manage out list.

I noted 2 people I liked on the list, so obviously informed them so they could play the game appropriately.

[Arif110]

Anything heavy really - unless stropped/strapped.

[SlowcoachIII]

Arif110 said:

Anything heavy really - unless stropped/strapped.

I just noticed that, wondering when someone would bring it up

[Arif110]

SlowcoachIII said:

I just noticed that, wondering when someone would bring it up

I was expecting a thread literally about things people have stupidly put on their roof-racks!