A bit council (Vol 4)

A bit council (Vol 4)

Author
Discussion

Dog Star

10,641 posts

115 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
borcy said:
Stan the Bat said:
An extra ten points if they had a drip machine with them as well.
Double bonus points if the drip machine is connected to a wheel chair.
My dad has just been in hospital for a suspected stroke (it wasn't) and millions of scans. Outside it was as described every time, despite it being a "red zone" for no smoking. Loads of them, mostly in wheel chairs, all looked at deaths door. Absolutely stank of smoke, I dare say that the staff won't move them on for fear of abuse.

Captain Raymond Holt

10,175 posts

141 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
There is a Children’s Hispital which I passed the other day which has signs outside saying something like Children learn from adults, please don’t smoke here, this is a no smoking site but white writing on a red background, essentially this message:





Next to this sign was a woman who was puffing away.


She was also pregnant.

Council jackpot?

Spare tyre

4,306 posts

77 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
I remember we were just coming out of a hospital or similar after having a miscarriage

There was some pregnant skank smoking cannabis

I nearly cried, poor bloody kid

HTP99

15,165 posts

87 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
A very skanky daughter of a friend of the wife, smoked on purpose during her pregnancy as "it can make the baby smaller", her reasoning a smaller baby results in giving birth being made easier.

She was also coming up to when her daugheter was starting school so therefore she would be expected to start looking for work and having her benefits reviewed, so she just got pregnant again.

She's horrible but actually thinks she's all that, she spends all her benefits on herself with her parents (quite well off) paying her living expenses and rent, they have threatened to withdraw this and she just says that they won't see their grandkids then!

It's odd has her brother is fine, a nice guy with a job and respect.

Big Easy

54 posts

27 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
shikari83 said:
Scotland = council
England = council

V8mate

42,872 posts

136 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Big Easy said:
shikari83 said:
Scotland = council
England = council
In parts, sure.

But Scotland is institutionally council. It's a whole nation of people who think they're owed a living. Scotland is the ten year old fat kid still sucking determinedly at his mum's flaccid tits. And he's ginger too.

RDM

1,626 posts

154 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
V8mate said:
In parts, sure.

But Scotland is institutionally council. It's a whole nation of people who think they're owed a living. Scotland is the ten year old fat kid still sucking determinedly at his mum's flaccid tits. And he's ginger too.
You’re not well

generationx

2,471 posts

52 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Accusing anything and everything of being Council: Council


Oh wait...

Big Easy

54 posts

27 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
V8mate said:
Big Easy said:
shikari83 said:
Scotland = council
England = council
In parts, sure.

But Scotland is institutionally council. It's a whole nation of people who think they're owed a living. Scotland is the ten year old fat kid still sucking determinedly at his mum's flaccid tits. And he's ginger too.
Quite a generalisation. An inaccurate one at that.

scoey1001

72 posts

28 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Know of a teenage boy with the middle name of 2pac.

Roofless Toothless

2,299 posts

79 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Dr Murdoch said:
FN2TypeR said:
Maximum points if they're breathing through an artificial hole in their throat
Extra bonus points if the cigarette is being consumed via their hole in their throat
Duke Ellington used to have an arranger called Billy Strayhorn, a musical genius if there ever was one. Poor Billy, however, probably through too many fags and drinks, got cancer of the oesophagus and had to have it removed. From there on his food went in via a hole in his side and a funnel.

On coming out of hospital he went to his favourite bar, sat on his regular stool at the end and ordered a cocktail. The barman mixed it all up, put in ice and probably a paper umbrella for good measure and handed it to Billy, who undid his jacket and poured the lot into the funnel. The barman was gobsmacked and said that he could have saved a lot of trouble and just pour neat gin in there. Billy replied,

"Man, where's the class in that?"



austinsmirk

3,591 posts

70 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Spare tyre said:
I remember we were just coming out of a hospital or similar after having a miscarriage

There was some pregnant skank smoking cannabis

I nearly cried, poor bloody kid
My wife and I lost a baby. I remember walking out of hospital with her, heartbroken. Though the scum mother's sat outside, heavily pregnant and smoking by the maternity wing.

I could have happily taken an axe to them and their scum tracksuit wearing partners. I say partners, half of them were their with hagged old mother's as obviously kayden isn't about for the birth of his child, jaxon.


alorotom

7,063 posts

134 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
HTP99 said:
A very skanky daughter of a friend of the wife, smoked on purpose during her pregnancy as "it can make the baby smaller", her reasoning a smaller baby results in giving birth being made easier.

She was also coming up to when her daugheter was starting school so therefore she would be expected to start looking for work and having her benefits reviewed, so she just got pregnant again.

She's horrible but actually thinks she's all that, she spends all her benefits on herself with her parents (quite well off) paying her living expenses and rent, they have threatened to withdraw this and she just says that they won't see their grandkids then!

It's odd has her brother is fine, a nice guy with a job and respect.
The girl in question isn't called Suzanne is she??? Sounds like the Mrs' cousin.

andygo

5,530 posts

202 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Short Grain said:
fk!!! Will she lose that and ever look normal again? Stupid Cow!!
Is she stuck to a window?

Frank7

3,834 posts

34 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
V8mate said:
Big Easy said:
shikari83 said:
Scotland = council
England = council
In parts, sure.

But Scotland is institutionally council. It's a whole nation of people who think they're owed a living. Scotland is the ten year old fat kid still sucking determinedly at his mum's flaccid tits. And he's ginger too.
A tad harsh I think, I’m not an habitual visitor to Scotland, went there a few times in my trucking days, and generally found the Scots to be okay.
We did a long weekend in Edinburgh a while back, very civilised, with excellent restaurants.
A couple of Scots are regulars in the pubs I frequent, and they’re okay too, and my nephew married a Scots girl, with a diamond personality, and her family at the wedding in Ayr were a hoot.

alorotom

7,063 posts

134 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
V8mate said:
Big Easy said:
shikari83 said:
Scotland = council
England = council
In parts, sure.

But Scotland is institutionally council. It's a whole nation of people who think they're owed a living. Scotland is the ten year old fat kid still sucking determinedly at his mum's flaccid tits. And he's ginger too.
Same as the whole area within the M25. Council as fk. Full of thieves, homeless and the pretentious ... Thoroughly unpleasant council place.

ApOrbital

6,565 posts

65 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Having two fridges council.

Btw i have three.

CoolHands

10,040 posts

142 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
ApOrbital said:
Having two fridges council.

Btw i have three.
Chest freezer! Double council

ApOrbital

6,565 posts

65 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
Coolhands council wink

WilliamWoollard

2,021 posts

140 months

Tuesday 22nd October
quotequote all
ApOrbital said:
Having two fridges council.

Btw i have three.
Only if one of them is in the garden.