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Tom8 said:
Ducks usualy die at this time of year due to mating. Basically females get gang raped by males and often drown and "turn their toes up"
Yep. exactly that. Duck mating is brutal. Woken up at 6am today to two males scrapping under the bedroom window.We have a duck pond and found a dead one last year. At the time Avian Flu was very much in the news locally and everyone was told to call DEFRA immediately etc and not touch dead birds.
Called them, they could not have been less interested. Said they might pop round to collect the following day if they were in the area, but could be a few weeks. I was told I needed to leave it on the pond. Pointed out a rotting duck perhaps wasn't best for our wildlife and they had no solutions, only the repeat of 'might be a few weeks'.
Came off the phone, though sod this, rowed out the boat, retrieved the duck, triple bagged it and binned it. DEFRA never did turn up.
SistersofPercy said:
Tom8 said:
Ducks usualy die at this time of year due to mating. Basically females get gang raped by males and often drown and "turn their toes up"
Yep. exactly that. Duck mating is brutal. Woken up at 6am today to two males scrapping under the bedroom window.They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Fermit said:
And thirded from us. As part of our poultry set up we have Ducks and Drakes. The wife had to rescue one poor girl being held underwater whilst the boy was having his wicked way. Also to note that they have a series of sharp ridges on the edge of their beaks, which means they can literally leave a ducks neck red raw after holding on to them for dear life.
They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
I bought my house in the summer, so had several months in the sun sipping drinks, watching all the ducks and thinking how idyllic it all was. Come January all hell broke loose and I suddenly realised a side of ducks a lot of people don't see down the local park.They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
I've run out and broken up scraps, lobbed balled up bread at errant males, shook boxes of stones etc. I quickly concluded that I needed a boat to reach the middle of the water to stop any of the serious 'dunking' (there's a reason we call our resident male Duncan) , and these are wild animals and I really needed to step back.
I'm a few years in now and have learned to shrug it off but visitors are often quite horrified at it all.
Ours eat bread, though they prefer the expensive floating duck food I buy. So much so if you leave the front door open they come in and head for the tub....
Other half thinks this hilarious. Me not so much because I have visions of him spooking the things one of these days and them flying upstairs creating havoc in a panic. He forgets they are wild sometimes I think.
Other half thinks this hilarious. Me not so much because I have visions of him spooking the things one of these days and them flying upstairs creating havoc in a panic. He forgets they are wild sometimes I think.
Fermit said:
And thirded from us. As part of our poultry set up we have Ducks and Drakes. The wife had to rescue one poor girl being held underwater whilst the boy was having his wicked way. Also to note that they have a series of sharp ridges on the edge of their beaks, which means they can literally leave a ducks neck red raw after holding on to them for dear life.
They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Reminds me of Scientifically Accurate Ducktails..They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
theaxe said:
Fermit said:
And thirded from us. As part of our poultry set up we have Ducks and Drakes. The wife had to rescue one poor girl being held underwater whilst the boy was having his wicked way. Also to note that they have a series of sharp ridges on the edge of their beaks, which means they can literally leave a ducks neck red raw after holding on to them for dear life.
They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Reminds me of Scientifically Accurate Ducktails..They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
pocketspring said:
theaxe said:
Fermit said:
And thirded from us. As part of our poultry set up we have Ducks and Drakes. The wife had to rescue one poor girl being held underwater whilst the boy was having his wicked way. Also to note that they have a series of sharp ridges on the edge of their beaks, which means they can literally leave a ducks neck red raw after holding on to them for dear life.
They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Reminds me of Scientifically Accurate Ducktails..They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
The local page is losing its mind, why you ask?
Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
geeks said:
pocketspring said:
theaxe said:
Fermit said:
And thirded from us. As part of our poultry set up we have Ducks and Drakes. The wife had to rescue one poor girl being held underwater whilst the boy was having his wicked way. Also to note that they have a series of sharp ridges on the edge of their beaks, which means they can literally leave a ducks neck red raw after holding on to them for dear life.
They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Reminds me of Scientifically Accurate Ducktails..They're not making love to their ladies, they're raping them.
Puzzles said:
The local page is losing its mind, why you ask?
Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
Do they have dogs?Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
BlindedByTheLights said:
Puzzles said:
The local page is losing its mind, why you ask?
Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
Do they have dogs?Because someone got flashed at night, no not like that, while driving another car flashed their lights at them.
Amazing the number of people who have said call the police!
Another one chips in, is it a black bmw they flashed me once.
And you’ve got all the conspiracy theorists saying they want to steal your car, attack you etc.
These people have wild imaginations. You’d have thought they were joking but they aren’t.
They have infrared led headlights that illuminate the invisible markings on the pavement
Hide you dogs hide your wife
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