Match.com (Vol. 7)
Discussion
Rh14n said:
It does seem to be a bit of a parallel universe out there and (thankfully) one I've never experienced first hand. It's interesting to hear about some of the traits women 'demand' e.g. over 6' tall, ability to make her laugh etc. What attributes do you explicitly express in your profiles as being required or will not compromise on when it comes to the ladies?
There are a few certain must haves in my mind. Do bear in mind I'm only a little over a month into OLD and still learning.Age is correct.
Pictures are up to date and representative.
Actually wanting to meet not just text endlessly.
Be upfront about kids and the status with their father. ( ie is it going to be a drama)
So those are the fundamentals for me it's then down to personal preference.
I'm fit I take care of myself so I find it attractive that the ladies have the same outlook.
Fundamentally though it's honesty if your starting out with a lie, what else is being made up?
Rh14n said:
It does seem to be a bit of a parallel universe out there and (thankfully) one I've never experienced first hand. It's interesting to hear about some of the traits women 'demand' e.g. over 6' tall, ability to make her laugh etc. What attributes do you explicitly express in your profiles as being required or will not compromise on when it comes to the ladies?
Don't explicitly state it in my profile but I'm pretty active and personal hell is sat in front of the TV watching TOWIE style shows. The pics of me outdoors hopefully puts those type of people off as well as the chunguses.My profile states I prefer natural eyebrows and I'm very cwtchy so you'd have to cope with that as its surprising the women who can't. I also consider smoking an intelligence test in this day and age so it says I wouldn't entertain those.
Actually love this thread and its contributors, often howling with laughter at some of the comments. Please keep it up.... 
I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
twing said:
Just come back from a couple of nights in Cardiff and checked my Tinder and POF, purely out of interest… Christ on a bike I could have had a field day if I hadn’t been with my current victim (insert strikethrough) life partner
The weird thing is that if you actually live in Cardiff it is virtually impossible to get a date with a local, however it is far far easier to get dates with Bristol based girls.On the flipside I know guys in Bristol who cannot get a sniff of a date from a local, but plenty of swipes from girls in Cardiff. Seems the ladies do not like to fish in the local ponds.
Abdul Abulbul Amir said:
On the height thing, over 6' and the desirability drops off albeit slowly.
My best mate is 5'10" in a tall shoe. 53 looks 10 years younger and interchanges 25 to 30 year old partners quite successfully! He usually bails when they start wanting babies he's done all that. Totally different approach to life from me but in the main he likes it. He's certainly never been hindered by his height. Doesn't use OLD though. Maybe the ladies think they want tall but in reality can they really be that bothered? Smaller guys can often look younger than they are as my mate does. PAUL.S. said:
twing said:
Just come back from a couple of nights in Cardiff and checked my Tinder and POF, purely out of interest… Christ on a bike I could have had a field day if I hadn’t been with my current victim (insert strikethrough) life partner
The weird thing is that if you actually live in Cardiff it is virtually impossible to get a date with a local, however it is far far easier to get dates with Bristol based girls.On the flipside I know guys in Bristol who cannot get a sniff of a date from a local, but plenty of swipes from girls in Cardiff. Seems the ladies do not like to fish in the local ponds.
fridaypassion said:
Abdul Abulbul Amir said:
On the height thing, over 6' and the desirability drops off albeit slowly.
My best mate is 5'10" in a tall shoe. 53 looks 10 years younger and interchanges 25 to 30 year old partners quite successfully! He usually bails when they start wanting babies he's done all that. Totally different approach to life from me but in the main he likes it. He's certainly never been hindered by his height. Doesn't use OLD though. Maybe the ladies think they want tall but in reality can they really be that bothered? Smaller guys can often look younger than they are as my mate does. It's like shopping for anything on the Internet- cars, coffee machines, TVs - it's easy to get bogged down in specs and details and be blinded to the bigger picture.
If you were in a shop you'd just buy a TV you liked that looked good to you - now in the Internet age you'll pour over reviews and spec sheets trying to find the theoretically perfect one...
V8covin said:
twing said:
Tbf I was chatting to a lovely lady from my area awhile ago, great fun and I knew she was localish but as soon as we realised we were in the same (tiny) village we both stopped messaging
For me that's a positive not a negativenumber2 said:
fridaypassion said:
Abdul Abulbul Amir said:
On the height thing, over 6' and the desirability drops off albeit slowly.
My best mate is 5'10" in a tall shoe. 53 looks 10 years younger and interchanges 25 to 30 year old partners quite successfully! He usually bails when they start wanting babies he's done all that. Totally different approach to life from me but in the main he likes it. He's certainly never been hindered by his height. Doesn't use OLD though. Maybe the ladies think they want tall but in reality can they really be that bothered? Smaller guys can often look younger than they are as my mate does. It's like shopping for anything on the Internet- cars, coffee machines, TVs - it's easy to get bogged down in specs and details and be blinded to the bigger picture.
If you were in a shop you'd just buy a TV you liked that looked good to you - now in the Internet age you'll pour over reviews and spec sheets trying to find the theoretically perfect one...
If I swipe on someone I like in Bumble, unless their search settings are set to incorporate all my basics, they won't even be show that I've swiped on them.
On Hinge they get shown anyway, even if you fall outside their criteria.
Nothing on Bumble for over a week.
5 on Hinge this morning.
BTW, 5'10" isn't small.
I have had a chuckle recently reading a lot of ladies profiles who at 5'6" and 5'7" consider themselves and state that they are tall. I guess they're all adding 4" to 5" of heel to the height.
Edited by 21ATS on Sunday 19th June 15:32
I believe that's the girls thinking in the main, they are happy for you to travel to them, and if its does not work out they wont bump into you in the future then either.
I would say 80% of my OLD dates I travelled over the Severn bridge. Problem with Cardiff also is that most of these apps work under the basis of a direct line from A to B. Places like Weston Super Mare etc are only 6 miles away across the estuary and on the app, but over an hour to drive to, Bristol shows up as not much further, but again an hours drive.
I would say 80% of my OLD dates I travelled over the Severn bridge. Problem with Cardiff also is that most of these apps work under the basis of a direct line from A to B. Places like Weston Super Mare etc are only 6 miles away across the estuary and on the app, but over an hour to drive to, Bristol shows up as not much further, but again an hours drive.
k.Are you paranoid ?cherie171 said:
…but if you're sending (and I'm guessing copy and pasting) hundreds of messages, I can only tell you that they're obvious and it shows you have zero actual interest in that person and are just fishing.
It’s a numbers game. Don’t forget online dating is heavily in favour of women. A half decent female profile may get 200+ messages in a day. A half decent male one?? 10, maybe?Write out a decent 5/6 line opener and spray’n’pray.
GloverMart said:
Actually love this thread and its contributors, often howling with laughter at some of the comments. Please keep it up....
I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
Thing the things you say that are going against you are within your power to change.I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
overweight if you want is an easy win,
poor teeth can be made average without money
always something you can do to improve your finances which results in
the ability to get your teeth sorted if they are that bad.
However being 6"4 at least gets your foot in the door.
As an experiment on POF i put in my tagline that I had won the lottery.
Message numbers went from 1 a month to at least 2 a week.
twing said:
wong said:
It might be great when you get on. But then, if you split up, and see her 3 x/week in the village.....
This 100% especially when the whole place knows your businessOf course, that’s the mindset that many get married with, but hey ho
vulture1 said:
GloverMart said:
Actually love this thread and its contributors, often howling with laughter at some of the comments. Please keep it up....
I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
Thing the things you say that are going against you are within your power to change.I'm tall enough (at 6'4"), genuinely quite funny, very loyal, live near two big cities (so plenty of choices) and am easy going.
However as a middle aged, grossly overweight, football obsessed single dad with poor teeth, little money or prospects living in a rented house and driving a 2003 Focus, I fear I am fishing in a different pool to everyone else but this thread still cheers me up and warns me off women in equal measures! Might also explain why I've been single for 14 years now.
overweight if you want is an easy win,
poor teeth can be made average without money
always something you can do to improve your finances which results in
the ability to get your teeth sorted if they are that bad.
However being 6"4 at least gets your foot in the door.
As an experiment on POF i put in my tagline that I had won the lottery.
Message numbers went from 1 a month to at least 2 a week.
But I know what I need to do in regards to the weight. I've lost 2.5 stone since January 1st and aim to lose another 5 stone by next June through adjusting my diet and continuing my walking (I walk a minimum of 3 miles every day). As I feel better and look better, that should help me become more confident and also help towards assisting me to make better decisions. On my daily walk, I often listen to the Diary Of A CEO podcasts which, although usually featuring famous people that I have little in common with, always seem to have something in them that flicks a switch in my head as to how I could be a better version of myself.
In the end, as you say, it's down to me to change the way I am. And I have my faultless sense of humour to rely on if things don't change.
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