Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 10ish)
Discussion
MartG said:
Did you hear about the nun who constantly obsessed over the manufacturing flaws in her outfit?
It was a bad habit.
No I didn’t but I heard about the howling and screaming coming from the nunnery in the early hours of the morning.It was a bad habit.
A local knocked on door and when the mother superior opened it he asked what was going on.
She said they were holding a vicars ball.
He said well let go so we can all get some sleep.
Enough with the banjo puns, I'm all dueled out - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsC4kf6x_Q0
paua said:
Enough with the banjo puns, I'm all dueled out - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsC4kf6x_Q0
Delivered right on time.Stolen from the web, I'm guessing Viz judging by the font...
I really hate people, so the chance to avoid them during lockdown has been lovely. Now that it's coming to an end, I might just stay indoors and pretend that I didn't know it had been lifted. A bit like those Japanese soldiers found hiding in the jungle, years after the end of WW2. And claiming that I hadn't seen anything on the TV or the internet will be entirely plausible as I'm with Virgin Media.
I really hate people, so the chance to avoid them during lockdown has been lovely. Now that it's coming to an end, I might just stay indoors and pretend that I didn't know it had been lifted. A bit like those Japanese soldiers found hiding in the jungle, years after the end of WW2. And claiming that I hadn't seen anything on the TV or the internet will be entirely plausible as I'm with Virgin Media.
James Bond hits upon hard times and finds himself facing a job seeker’s interview.
"Well Mr Bond, we have two positions we can offer you, one is giving lectures to children on the benefits of a career in military intelligence, and the other, which I think you will prefer, is in the fabric staining department of a yarn mill."
BRIEF SILENCE
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mr Bond, I expect you to dye."
"Well Mr Bond, we have two positions we can offer you, one is giving lectures to children on the benefits of a career in military intelligence, and the other, which I think you will prefer, is in the fabric staining department of a yarn mill."
BRIEF SILENCE
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mr Bond, I expect you to dye."
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