Geek Jokes Volume 0b10

[Clockwork Cupcake]

Strangely Brown said:

Anyway, the joke only works with a human in the car and it has to be Heisenberg to make the connection.

Policeman: Do you know how fast you were going?
Heisenberg: No, officer. But I know where I am.

A fuller variant of the joke is as follows:

Four quantum physicists are in a car. Heisenberg is driving like he is in The Matrix. Schrödinger is in the front seat waving at the other cars. Einstein and Bohr are in the back arguing when they get pulled over. 

The officer asks Heisenberg, “do you know how fast you were going?”

“No, but we know exactly where we are,” Heisenberg replies.

The officer looks confused and says, “You were doing 120 mph!”

Heisenberg throws his arms up and cries, “Great! Now we’re lost!”

The officer looks over the car and asks Schrödinger if they have anything in the trunk. 

“A cat,” Schrödinger replies.

The officer opens the trunk and yells, “This cat is dead!”

Schrödinger angrily replies, “Well it is now!”

Bohr says, “On the bright side, a moment ago we didn’t have a position, speed, or a cat. Now we have all three!”

Fed up, the officer says, “I just want to know how many of you I need to bring back to the station!”

“Roll dice for it?” Einstein asks.

---

See
https://csferrie.medium.com/the-greatest-joke-in-t...

Other variants of the joke are available.

[captain_cynic]

Zumbruk said:

MartG said:

That's one (of many) things that piss me off about Star (Trek|Wars). In many cases we have better technology now; computers and weapons being particular examples.

With TOS, I think a lot of it came down to the cost of the props. They aren't cheap, especially in the 1960s and wouldn't make sense to make single use props.

Although sometime between the 2250s and 2460s they did invent the PADD.

[Clockwork Cupcake]

captain_cynic said:

With TOS, I think a lot of it came down to the cost of the props. They aren't cheap, especially in the 1960s and wouldn't make sense to make single use props.

Although sometime between the 2250s and 2460s they did invent the PADD.

Also, isn't that a screenshot from the pilot episode? I seem to remember that they had some kind of thick wedge-shaped tablet during the actual TOS

Seems a little unfair to expect a shoestring-budget 1960's Sci-Fi show to accurately predict the technology of the 21st Century. Plus they did predict the personal communicator and the scanner.

[captain_cynic]

Clockwork Cupcake said:

Also, isn't that a screenshot from the pilot episode? I seem to remember that they had some kind of thick wedge-shaped tablet during the actual TOS

Seems a little unfair to expect a shoestring-budget 1960's Sci-Fi show to accurately predict the technology of the 21st Century. Plus they did predict the personal communicator and the scanner.

I looked it up a few minutes after I posted that, ST TOS had a per episode budget of $180,000 in 1960s money (about $1.5m today), in comparison ST Picard has a budget of $8m per ep. Not exactly shoestring, but also not that extravagant.

[Clockwork Cupcake]

captain_cynic said:

I looked it up a few minutes after I posted that, ST TOS had a per episode budget of $180,000 in 1960s money (about $1.5m today), in comparison ST Picard has a budget of $8m per ep. Not exactly shoestring, but also not that extravagant.

Ok, but I think my point is still valid

[Halmyre]

2001: A Space Odyssey, created around the same time as Star Trek, had what we would recognise as tablets or iPads.

[e-honda]

There security is terrible.
I think about 25% of the story lines would have been rendered pointless if they gave all the crew a yubikey

[defblade]

Halmyre said:

2001: A Space Odyssey, created around the same time as Star Trek, had what we would recognise as tablets or iPads.

And here in 2023, at my work we've got desktops, laptops, tablets, smart phones, smart watches... and clipboards.
I don't think the clipboard will ever go completely out of use, it's too simple/fit-for-purpose. And I don't think we will ever go completely paperless, either, even if we can.

[Caruso]

defblade said:

Halmyre said:

2001: A Space Odyssey, created around the same time as Star Trek, had what we would recognise as tablets or iPads.

And here in 2023, at my work we've got desktops, laptops, tablets, smart phones, smart watches... and clipboards.
I don't think the clipboard will ever go completely out of use, it's too simple/fit-for-purpose. And I don't think we will ever go completely paperless, either, even if we can.

One time I had to print out a pack of Project Board Papers for the Paperless Office Project. I kid you not.

[ZesPak]

Halmyre said:

2001: A Space Odyssey, created around the same time as Star Trek, had what we would recognise as tablets or iPads.

It also had about 60x the budget of a Star Trek episode.

[LordGrover]

ZesPak said:

It also had about 60x the budget of a Star Trek episode.

So how much does imagination cost?

[ZesPak]

LordGrover said:

So how much does imagination cost?

Depends.

If you're imagining a rotating room for artificial gravity, apparently quite a lot.
Still wouldn't work irl though.

[Clockwork Cupcake]

LordGrover said:

So how much does imagination cost?

I don't know, but Gene Roddenberry and his team imagined a hell of a lot. And, as I said, the screenshot with the clipboard that started this all off was from the pilot episode.

This is what they used in the actual series. It was called the PADD (Personal Access Display Device).


https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Personal_Acce...

So how much does getting your facts right cost?

[deckster]

Clockwork Cupcake said:

I don't know, but Gene Roddenberry and his team imagined a hell of a lot. And, as I said, the screenshot with the clipboard that started this all off was from the pilot episode.

This is what they used in the actual series. It was called the PADD (Personal Access Display Device).


https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Personal_Acce...

So how much does getting your facts right cost?

That's clearly an etch-a-sketch.

[Clockwork Cupcake]

deckster said:

That's clearly an etch-a-sketch.

And a gun used in a Doctor Who episode was a Gardena water sprinkler identical to the one my mum had (and which I had already been using as a gun). And a communicator in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace was razor for shaving your legs with.

Your point is?

[Halmyre]

Clockwork Cupcake said:

deckster said:

That's clearly an etch-a-sketch.

And a gun used in a Doctor Who episode was a Gardena water sprinkler identical to the one my mum had (and which I had already been using as a gun). And a communicator in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace was razor for shaving your legs with.

Some of McCoy's surgical instruments in the original series were salt shakers.

[e-honda]

I like the flashing tube things

[TGCOTF-dewey]

e-honda said:

I like the flashing tube things

Posted this before... But seems apt.

[deckster]

Clockwork Cupcake said:

deckster said:

That's clearly an etch-a-sketch.

And a gun used in a Doctor Who episode was a Gardena water sprinkler identical to the one my mum had (and which I had already been using as a gun). And a communicator in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace was razor for shaving your legs with.

Your point is?

It was a joke.

[Sporky]

deckster said:

It was a joke.

Not sure this is the thread for that sort of thing.