Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 11)

[Doofus]

MartG said:

I understand the pictures, just not what's funny.

[slopes]

Doofus said:

MartG said:

I understand the pictures, just not what's funny.

I got the reference and it is somewhat worthy of a little giggle
But not what i would call hilarious

[Nimby]

Doofus said:

I understand the pictures, just not what's funny.

Lucy (from "Peanuts") in the sky with a diamond. No, I don't get it as a joke either.

[Skyedriver]

Milkyway said:

Skyedriver said:

Earl of Hazzard said:

Piggott

But yes quite a good one.

Derby?

With a casket made from Epsom Oaks

[Jenny Tailor]

slopes said:

Doofus said:

MartG said:

I understand the pictures, just not what's funny.

I got the reference and it is somewhat worthy of a little giggle
But not what i would call hilarious

I got it too.
Slow day in the cartoon office.

They can't all be winners.

[john2443]

Teacher - Who's your favourite literary vampire?

Johnny - The one from Sesame Street.

Teacher - He doesn't count.

Johnny - I can assure you that he does.

[Sticks.]

john2443 said:

Teacher - Who's your favourite literary vampire?

Johnny - The one from Sesame Street.

Teacher - He doesn't count.

Johnny - I can assure you that he does.

[littleowl]

Sweet Caroline? To celebrate the Queens Platinum Jubilee?

They haven't thought this through at all have they?

"Hands, touching hands"
"Reaching out, touching me, touching you"

Prince Andrew? Is that you?

[Jenny Tailor]

littleowl said:

Sweet Caroline? To celebrate the Queens Platinum Jubilee?

They haven't thought this through at all have they?

"Hands, touching hands"
"Reaching out, touching me, touching you"

Prince Andrew? Is that you?

oops.

[ArmaghMan]

[GloverMart]

Two men debate whether Hawaii is pronounced "HaVaii" or "HaWaii."

They ask a passerby, who answers "Havaii."

"Thank you," says the satisfied first man.

"You're velcome," replies the passerby.

[Alpacaman]

I need everyone to wish me luck. I have a meeting at the bank later, and if all goes well I will be out of debt. I'm so excited I can barely put on my ski mask.

[Vipers]

[Legacywr]

[Earl of Hazzard]

[Ultra Sound Guy]

I’ve joined a dating website for arsonists, they send me new matches every week

[vaud]

Ultra Sound Guy said:

I’ve joined a dating website for arsonists, they send me new matches every week

Worthy of Pixelpeep.

[GloverMart]

I was waiting in line outside B&Q yesterday when a mate called and asked how big the queue was?

I said "The same size as the B!"

[Road2Ruin]

GloverMart said:

I was waiting in line outside B&Q yesterday when a mate called and asked how big the queue was?

I said "The same size as the B!"

Covid wants it's joke back.

[GloverMart]

Road2Ruin said:

GloverMart said:

I was waiting in line outside B&Q yesterday when a mate called and asked how big the queue was?

I said "The same size as the B!"

Covid wants it's joke back.

Came up on my Facebook memories, I should have checked first.