Funny things to write in a leaving card

[Famous Graham]

Aren't "funny things written in cards", not, by definition?

[PD9]

Jasandjules said:

Thank f**k for that, the coffee machine will be free.

One of my favorites

[monthefish]

Famous Graham said:

Aren't "funny things written in cards", not, by definition?

I've chuckled at quite a few of the posts in this thread

(especially liked the one about the fiver/whiparound).

[TonyHetherington]

Every so often a birthday card comes round to sign. So "Happy Birthday, all the best, from Tony" goes straight in.

Card on my desk.

"Happy Birthday, all the best, from Tony"

It was a leaving card, already signed by 60+ people.

Bugger!

[okgo]

Chap here writes "sorry you're leaving" in EVERY card that comes round.

[Steamer]

okgo said:

Chap here writes "sorry you're leaving" in EVERY card that comes round.

That must work a treat in the "Get Well Soon" and "Sorry to hear about your recent bereavement" cards!

[Mr_Yogi]

Someone in my department just writes "Best of British" in all the cards

[V8S]

All these are inordinately funny, especially Tony's admission.

[DrTre]

When you're new to a company and a colleague you have only fleetingly met gets rushed to hospital at the weekend, don't write a bland/blokey "Keep your pecker up" on the card without first finding out what's wrong with him...apparently his words were "Is he having a fking laugh?"

..Torsion of the testes as it turns out.

[WorAl]

DrTre said:

When you're new to a company and a colleague you have only fleetingly met gets rushed to hospital at the weekend, don't write a bland/blokey "Keep your pecker up" on the card without first finding out what's wrong with him...apparently his words were "Is he having a fking laugh?"

..Torsion of the testes as it turns out.

[Lastinclass]

I always write:

Remember every meeting has an idiot in it... if you can't stop them keep quiet!

[Steamer]

Lastinclass said:

I always write:

Remember every meeting has an idiot in it... if you can't stop them keep quiet!

or... if you can't spot them, it might just be the slexdistic person standing by the white board with a marker pen in his hand

[benoli]

thegavster said:

TonyHetherington said:

Every so often a birthday card comes round to sign. So "Happy Birthday, all the best, from Tony" goes straight in.

Card on my desk.

"Happy Birthday, all the best, from Tony"

It was a leaving card, already signed by 60+ people.

Bugger!

Probably funnier for the recipient than 99% of the other things in there though

could be worse . . could be a 'with condolences' card

[dickyf]

staple your business card in. should give the right message especially if done so badly it sticks out of the side and wont go in the envelope properly.

[Fastra]

Put kisses under every name from the opposite sex that's already signed it and make them really regret leaving......!!!??

[V8S]

dickyf said:

staple your business card in. should give the right message especially if done so badly it sticks out of the side and wont go in the envelope properly.

[V8mate]

V8S said:

dickyf said:

staple your business card in. should give the right message especially if done so badly it sticks out of the side and wont go in the envelope properly.

excellent!

[snuffle]

Who ?

[buggalugs]

In amongst a large cluster of "Good Luck"s, write "Good fk".

[Digger]

Boo Hoo!