Sean Connery Joke (Volume IV)
Discussion
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, opened the New Testament and shows him the top of several pages that do say... "HEBREWS"
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, opened the New Testament and shows him the top of several pages that do say... "HEBREWS"
Don't think it's a repost - just a crap joke...
A man is staying at a small hotel. Every morning, there would be a knock on the door. A beautiful young maid would gently wake him up, and then give him a bl*wjob, followed by his morning cuppa. The man thought that this was fantastic, and so every day would begin in this manner.
At the end of his stay, he went to reception to settle up. On looking at the bill, it was quite a bit more than he thought it was going to be. When he asked the managerwhy this was the case, the manager replied:
'Well sir, you did make full use of the goblin teasmade'!!
(if you are of a certain age, you might have to ask an old 'un)
A man is staying at a small hotel. Every morning, there would be a knock on the door. A beautiful young maid would gently wake him up, and then give him a bl*wjob, followed by his morning cuppa. The man thought that this was fantastic, and so every day would begin in this manner.
At the end of his stay, he went to reception to settle up. On looking at the bill, it was quite a bit more than he thought it was going to be. When he asked the managerwhy this was the case, the manager replied:
'Well sir, you did make full use of the goblin teasmade'!!
(if you are of a certain age, you might have to ask an old 'un)
A woman strode angrily into the large drug-store-cum-general-store, slapped a package on the counter, and loudly expressed her dissatisfaction.
The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?"
The woman's eyes got very large, and she whispered, "Do you mean to tell me that Pussy Treats are meant for 'cats'?"
The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?"
The woman's eyes got very large, and she whispered, "Do you mean to tell me that Pussy Treats are meant for 'cats'?"
driverrob said:
A woman strode angrily into the large drug-store-cum-general-store, slapped a package on the counter, and loudly expressed her dissatisfaction.
The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?"
The woman's eyes got very large, and she whispered, "Do you mean to tell me that Pussy Treats are meant for 'cats'?"
At least it's new... The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat them?"
The woman's eyes got very large, and she whispered, "Do you mean to tell me that Pussy Treats are meant for 'cats'?"
. very good! Dave is appearing on stars on their eyes
Matthew Kelly says Dave you have a very intresting story to tell us
Well Matthew I was supposed to be on the show last year but I had a terrible road accident.
On the way to show my Uncle was driving and I was passenger when we suddenly hit a tree.
Sadly my uncle never made it and I lost both my legs but through the miracles of modern surgery they used my uncles legs and im now able to walk again
Well Dave tell us who your gonna be
Well tonight Matthew im gonna be
(you all know where this going)
SIMON AND HALF UNCLE
Matthew Kelly says Dave you have a very intresting story to tell us
Well Matthew I was supposed to be on the show last year but I had a terrible road accident.
On the way to show my Uncle was driving and I was passenger when we suddenly hit a tree.
Sadly my uncle never made it and I lost both my legs but through the miracles of modern surgery they used my uncles legs and im now able to walk again
Well Dave tell us who your gonna be
Well tonight Matthew im gonna be
(you all know where this going)
SIMON AND HALF UNCLE
Edited by toggs on Saturday 9th May 00:54
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