Farting in front of your wife/gf
Discussion
First night I bedded her.
No way was she expecting it! Muwahahaha!
I can't remember what I said to her but I convinced her to look down under the duvet and outeth the stench came!!!
Thankfully she found it hilarious (after the hour that it took to stop me from laughing) and that's when I knew she was a keeper.
No way was she expecting it! Muwahahaha!
I can't remember what I said to her but I convinced her to look down under the duvet and outeth the stench came!!!
Thankfully she found it hilarious (after the hour that it took to stop me from laughing) and that's when I knew she was a keeper.
Edited by peterattheboro on Saturday 9th October 01:17
peterattheboro said:
First night I bedded her.
No way was she expecting it! Muwahahaha!
I can't remember what I said to her but I convinced her to look down under the duvet and outeth the stench came!!!
Thankfully she found it hilarious (after the hour that it took to stop me from laughing) and that's when I knew she was a keeper.
That's disgusting.No way was she expecting it! Muwahahaha!
I can't remember what I said to her but I convinced her to look down under the duvet and outeth the stench came!!!
Thankfully she found it hilarious (after the hour that it took to stop me from laughing) and that's when I knew she was a keeper.
Yet people (men) wonder why/how the romance dies in their relationships...
Tsippy said:
About two weeks, I used the backwards crab manouveur to pin her to the floor and let rip on her tummy as she lay helpless. Still proud of that one, it was one of those funny rippler ones that felt like someone had smacked my a
hole with a bamboo cane.
hole with a bamboo cane.Thats really quite foul. I mean I'm a fairly f
ked up sort of chap, but even I would go so far as to do that. Whilst I wouldn't go for the full Dutch Oven, I think it's somewhat prissy that one can't accept that it happens.
My female housemate and my last ex stank the bathroom out whenever they took a st, so it's not exactly unfair that I might lose control of my sphincter every so often.
And relish it.
A bit.
My female housemate and my last ex stank the bathroom out whenever they took a s
t, so it's not exactly unfair that I might lose control of my sphincter every so often.And relish it.
A bit.
Not always voluntary though, is it? You can keep your ringpiece as pursed as a schoolmistress's lips all evening, ease the pressure before bed and all, but we all fart in our sleep, and if you're the one doing the spooning, you're going to get it in the belly.......
Edited to add - I never fart in front of my girlfriend. If it's her turn, I wouldn't dream of going first. Don't thank me, thank Jim Davidson.
Edited to add - I never fart in front of my girlfriend. If it's her turn, I wouldn't dream of going first. Don't thank me, thank Jim Davidson.
Edited by ajcj on Saturday 9th October 07:24
Famous Graham said:
Did it sound like a clown running over some jelly?
Excellent cross referencing!I managed to hold fire, so to speak, whilst courting. At times I felt like I would explode while snogging on the sofa to various prog rock albums in the late '70s and walked home late at night like one of those rocket sleds!
Courting lasted 7 years. Holding them in may have been an error as she was simply horrified when the first post marriage bottom burp was delivered. And she has stoutly remained horrified every time for the last 26 years.
Particularly when I tought the children that 'a fart is always funny!'
I have been in the doghouse so long now it is nicely decorated and has a hot tub!
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