365 days without booze... join me?

[superkartracer]

C.A.R. said:

just pointing out that having an entirely negative view of alcohol makes you an asshole

What does this guy do?? rip the drink from peoples hands

i'd guess it only makes you a *asshole* if you tell people not to drink while minding their own business , same as many others areas like speeding/smoking/drugs add list -
But you could also say drinkers that find it strange people don't drink are also assholes, you must drink or you're boring types.... actually it's them that are boring as they need some kind of prop to enjoy themselves ( the heavy drinkers anyway ).

Personally i don't give a toss what people do and def never advise, only exception would be a smoker blowing said filth into my face that would defo invoke a response, i think thats rather fair.

Pointing out the effects of alcohol us tho if asked is fine, bit like what a Doctor does when advise required, or a parent to a child.

Only reason i stopped drinking was i'm an athlete ( but i also used my father as an excuse to cut right back, not that i drank heavy anyway )

[JFReturns]

Well fellas, it is time for me to bow out of this thread. I stopped drinking beer for just shy of six months and have proved to myself I can do it.

It has been a worthwhile experience, and I know from this point I will be able to drink moderately whereas before I struggled (though not as badly as some on this thread).

Good luck with your goals, I'll drop back in to offer encouragement

[nick_j007]

JFReturns said:

Well fellas, it is time for me to bow out of this thread. I stopped drinking beer for just shy of six months and have proved to myself I can do it.

It has been a worthwhile experience, and I know from this point I will be able to drink moderately whereas before I struggled (though not as badly as some on this thread).

Good luck with your goals, I'll drop back in to offer encouragement

I'll have a beer with you then....Ahhhhh! See. I have another 6 months ahead yet I have no idea what I'll be doing after 365 days are up. I'd like to be able to stop altogether and not be bothered to do that. It's still on my mind a lot I have to say.

Nick

[JFReturns]

You have been an inspiration with this thread Nick, I'm sure you will make 365 days and after that... the correct decision

[Smitters]

C.A.R. said:

Not really got a point to make in this thread, just pointing out that having an entirely negative view of alcohol makes you a social assh*le who is difficult to be around, be it in a restaurant, pub or even at a home BBQ when you fancy a quick beer. Just because I have more control of myself and I'm able to recognise when to stop drinking he somehow thought that by not drinking at all this made him a better person.

But isn't the crux of it that he'd reached a point in his life where he'd rather not have alcohol in his life and if that means being a grumpy friendless sober a*sehole and the key word and most important point is "sober", then that's his choice?

I take your point, don't get me wrong, and perhaps it's the route he took. I've always been slightly suspicious of packaging religion alongside healing, but that's a whole other can'o'worms..! It also sounds like a level of denial. By that, I mean he's still denying that he had a problem with alcohol and not everyone does. It's likely a defence mechanism as assuming everyone who does drink is in the same boat is mentally much easier than realising you personally have a shortcoming that others don't.

JFReturns said:

Well fellas, it is time for me to bow out of this thread. I stopped drinking beer for just shy of six months and have proved to myself I can do it.

It has been a worthwhile experience, and I know from this point I will be able to drink moderately whereas before I struggled (though not as badly as some on this thread).

Good luck with your goals, I'll drop back in to offer encouragement

Hmmm. Suspiciously just in time to build a tolerance prior to Le Mans... Seriously though, well done. I'm looking forward to my six monther.


Right - cheeky round-up. Day 99! Treble figures tomorrow, which will be very cool. I must admit though, having had an old mate round this weekend and the sun shining, plus a load of stress hanging round, the temptation was extremely strong! Still, I reckon that if I'd buckled I'd either have been immediately gutted, or got uproariously drunk and then felt really bad today for multiple reasons. Recognising that stress and sitting in the sun are both beer associated activities and denying the urge feels good today. And I don't have a massive headache, which is usually the result of drinking beer in the sun!

[Petrus1983]

Just a quick update. Now been through the 2 week mark without any real thoughts of drinking. I'm enjoying the new me and have mainly been focused on the gym, reading and work. There have been a few 'pushing' factors, namely being in Spain for a week and my girlfriend leaving me - but neither has changed my willpower. Although this isn't a path I'd intended to go down whilst away from my gf, it's re-assuring to know that even significant factors haven't been tempting enough to reach for that beer! Now have to try and reach back for my ex instead!

Edited by Petrus1983 on Wednesday 30th May 00:38

[nick_j007]

JFReturns said:

You have been an inspiration with this thread Nick, I'm sure you will make 365 days and after that... the correct decision

Thank you. The benefits still far outweigh the apparent loss of fun or enjoyment in the short term. I always found the ratio of fun when drinking to that of feeling rough, hung over, over weight, (the list is extensive) was not in the favour of drinking!

[Smitters]

Petrus1983 said:

Just a quick update. Now been through the 2 week mark without any real thoughts of drinking. I'm enjoying the new me and have mainly been focused on the gym, reading and work. There have been a few 'pushing' factors, namely being in Spain for a week and my girlfriend leaving me - but neither has changed my willpower. Although this isn't a path I'd intended to go down whilst away from my gf, it's re-assuring to know that even significant factors haven't been tempting enough to reach for that beer! Now have to try and reach back for my ex instead!

Edited by Petrus1983 on Wednesday 30th May 00:38

Good work on getting through a pretty significant milestone. I found the first month hard and the first two weeks the hardest, so kudos. Double kudos for not wavering when home life is in turmoil. It's the classic fallback and the fact that you've not succumbed to temptation shows you're pretty serious about quitting. Fingers crossed and if you do wobble, try re-reading some of the thread before making the final do I/don't I decision.

[nick_j007]

Smitters said:

C.A.R. said:

Not really got a point to make in this thread, just pointing out that having an entirely negative view of alcohol makes you a social assh*le who is difficult to be around, be it in a restaurant, pub or even at a home BBQ when you fancy a quick beer. Just because I have more control of myself and I'm able to recognise when to stop drinking he somehow thought that by not drinking at all this made him a better person.

But isn't the crux of it that he'd reached a point in his life where he'd rather not have alcohol in his life and if that means being a grumpy friendless sober a*sehole and the key word and most important point is "sober", then that's his choice?

I take your point, don't get me wrong, and perhaps it's the route he took. I've always been slightly suspicious of packaging religion alongside healing, but that's a whole other can'o'worms..! It also sounds like a level of denial. By that, I mean he's still denying that he had a problem with alcohol and not everyone does. It's likely a defence mechanism as assuming everyone who does drink is in the same boat is mentally much easier than realising you personally have a shortcoming that others don't.

JFReturns said:

Well fellas, it is time for me to bow out of this thread. I stopped drinking beer for just shy of six months and have proved to myself I can do it.

It has been a worthwhile experience, and I know from this point I will be able to drink moderately whereas before I struggled (though not as badly as some on this thread).

Good luck with your goals, I'll drop back in to offer encouragement

Hmmm. Suspiciously just in time to build a tolerance prior to Le Mans... Seriously though, well done. I'm looking forward to my six monther.


Right - cheeky round-up. Day 99! Treble figures tomorrow, which will be very cool. I must admit though, having had an old mate round this weekend and the sun shining, plus a load of stress hanging round, the temptation was extremely strong! Still, I reckon that if I'd buckled I'd either have been immediately gutted, or got uproariously drunk and then felt really bad today for multiple reasons. Recognising that stress and sitting in the sun are both beer associated activities and denying the urge feels good today. And I don't have a massive headache, which is usually the result of drinking beer in the sun!

It's inevitable that when you stop drinking you can see the behaviour and actions of others in a different (sober) light. I have concern for some people I know and how much they constantly drink, but it's not my role to say anything to them. When not drinking I realise how booze-centric this whole country is. For example, I have to endure soaps on TV each night if I want to sit down and enjoy time with my OH and daughter. All of these are focussed on the pub as a community and I spend most nights watching other people drink alcohol on TV which does nothing for my 'I could kill a beer' thinking. Anyway, it's getting easier as I go and I'll stick to it.

Well done Smitters re the weekend. I admit a few times I've thought 'Well I can't drink as I've said on PH I have another 6 months to go!' lol. Plus it would I feel undo all my hard work so far. I've done a couple of 9/10 month periods before, but never quite the year as I feel that will have greater significance to me in terms of making a genuine long term assessment of how much I need alcohol in my life. Looking back, it takes me 6 months to become reasonably strong and to feel more divorced from the habit of drinking. I'm pleased to say that I'm still losing about a pound or more per week and am just 8lbs off my ideal weight now. Cycling a few times each week and looking forward to a fairly active week next week in Cornwall where I hope to get a night in cycle touring which could incur about 40 miles and to do 'coasteering' which will be a first!

In the past I have gone down a virtual no carb route for weight loss and whilst it does shave the pounds off, I felt awful last week doing it.Such a bad mood I thought I might shoot someone if they looked at me in the wrong way. So, going to try and focus on activity and healthy balanced diet from here on in. I've lost the bulk of my weight already. Feeling better this week on good rice and veg and protein meals with snacks in between. I just know that there would be no way I'd take care of myself in this way if I were drinking still. Ok, I'll stop there before I start a new page.

Thanks all.

Nick

[nick_j007]

Smitters said:

Petrus1983 said:

Just a quick update. Now been through the 2 week mark without any real thoughts of drinking. I'm enjoying the new me and have mainly been focused on the gym, reading and work. There have been a few 'pushing' factors, namely being in Spain for a week and my girlfriend leaving me - but neither has changed my willpower. Although this isn't a path I'd intended to go down whilst away from my gf, it's re-assuring to know that even significant factors haven't been tempting enough to reach for that beer! Now have to try and reach back for my ex instead!

Edited by Petrus1983 on Wednesday 30th May 00:38

Good work on getting through a pretty significant milestone. I found the first month hard and the first two weeks the hardest, so kudos. Double kudos for not wavering when home life is in turmoil. It's the classic fallback and the fact that you've not succumbed to temptation shows you're pretty serious about quitting. Fingers crossed and if you do wobble, try re-reading some of the thread before making the final do I/don't I decision.

What Smitters said

Interestingly, I always found a week or two quite doable as the feelings of euphoria of not being hung over and feeling so much better had a great novelty feeling. Then after a while I'd strat to think oh I'm ok now and could kill a drink. That's just me anyway.

Nick

[Petrus1983]

Cheers guys. On the basis that it never rains but pours I was already going into this acknowledging that my days were numbered with my gf, not least as she'd told me to stop a month before. Anyway, no one likes being told what to do, and inevitably the trigger point comes along sooner or later spurring people into real action!

I appreciate that probably the further I move into this the harder it could be to say no, as in a grey area, but at the moment the positives are so strongly outweighing any downsides (I haven't found any yet) that I'm hopeful things will stay on course.

[Petrus1983]

Rubbish - just 24 hours later and I may not have fully realised how closely I'd linked my happiness and intentions to do this to my relationship with my ex Head down and concentrate hard on remembering why I'm doing this, alternatively lock myself in a room Train Spotting style!

[escortwagon]

Having read a fair chunk of this thread it's easy to say you're an inspirational bunch.
Being a young'un (20) alcohol is never far away from me and while it often brings on good times I question weather it's really necessary.

When I'm driving, obviously I don't touch it - and going out can be difficult when people get merry. Compounded by the fact the majority of my friends are 30 minutes drive away, so walking home or getting a cab is not really in the question. I try my best, I do well socially anyway but it can get wearing watching people get tipsy while you jiggle the car keys in your pocket - as I'm sure you wise heads know.
Of course we all chase the holy grail of being able to enjoy a night out without drink, and I'd happily take pointers. I'm sure many people can understand it's difficult at this age because alcohol is rarely questioned.

I question my intake for personal reasons - for example, the effect it had on my grandfather which either led to, or contributed to him losing interest in his hobbies such as cars, bikes and motorsport - a real tragedy for a passionate man.
Furthermore, my best friend's father was an alcoholic (a few years clean, a good man but tricky) and while my friend and I drank a lot for a few years it probably contributed to the breakdown in our relationship, as his father's traits began to appear in him while under the influence.

living with my parents, who drink a fair amount over weekends (and they don't question it) doesn't help.

On the other side, I enjoy beer&wines for taste reasons and it would be a shame to lose out on a that treat.

Maybe that's just the way it is for my age, things will calm down. I don't have much of an addictive personality.

I wish all of you participating the best of luck, I hope you find the results you seek.

[Smitters]

Petrus1983 said:

Rubbish - just 24 hours later and I may not have fully realised how closely I'd linked my happiness and intentions to do this to my relationship with my ex Head down and concentrate hard on remembering why I'm doing this, alternatively lock myself in a room Train Spotting style!

The highs and lows are what make going cold turkey tough. Try to remember that your happiness is number one priority and with personal calm comes a much more approachable and dateable human being, be it your ex or the next lucky Miss 1983. Hopefully you've made it through the Jubilee OK, but if not, don't be too hard on yourself as having lots change in life in one go is properly hard. Start the count again - you've got a target to aim for now.

escortwagon said:

Of course we all chase the holy grail of being able to enjoy a night out without drink, and I'd happily take pointers.

Yeah - likewise! I think it depends a lot on who you're out with and what you do. Going dry for a night out would have been weird five or ten years ago. When I think back to some of the dive clubs I used to go to, I can see that any sober person would walk out for fear of catching something or simply sticking to the carpet. Not much incentive to stay sober then! Nowadays life is more sedate and as such it's a lot easier. I'll be honest, having mates who chuck a timely "I can't believe how fit you're looking..." or similar really helps!

escortwagon said:

I wish all of you participating the best of luck, I hope you find the results you seek.

Cheers!

Mini round-up:

Bugger me if the Jubilee weekend wasn't tough. Sitting around, barbecuing and yacking with mates just begs for a beer. Still, another tough weekend just means it's a bit easier to tough out the next one. I'm about ten days off a big walking holiday too, so there's a real incentive to keep exercising, stay fit, healthy and hydrated and get there in one piece. I'm joining a group, but holidaying solo, so it's easier to just tell people I don't drink, rather than having to explain the whole rationale over and over, as I've had to with friends and one particularly obsessive neighbour, who always wants to know if I'm still not drinking and pretty much refuses to go to the pub for a "pint" if I'm not having beer.

Anyway, consistently under 75kg now, which is good and over 100 days, which is even better. Keep up the good work folks.

[Petrus1983]

Hey Smitters - thanks for the good advice I did make it through the Jubilee Ok thanks - have to admit it's a good feeling as 4 days of temptation can't be ignored! I went out on Friday night till late 'o' clock but was able to make an excuse to leave to phone the ex in question circa 3am, it's nice she's there to support me still. The rest of the week-end wasn't so bad, but I did leave most things v early, bored with everyone else spilling beer all over me!

[Smitters]

Petrus1983 said:

Hey Smitters - thanks for the good advice I did make it through the Jubilee Ok thanks - have to admit it's a good feeling as 4 days of temptation can't be ignored! I went out on Friday night till late 'o' clock but was able to make an excuse to leave to phone the ex in question circa 3am, it's nice she's there to support me still. The rest of the week-end wasn't so bad, but I did leave most things v early, bored with everyone else spilling beer all over me!

No worries and great work. Nice that you have someone to talk to when it's rough too. It helps a lot, but every time you make it through a tester like this, it just adds strength to your resolve, so it'll be a little bit easier next time.

[nick_j007]

Smitters said:

Cheers!

Mini round-up:

Bugger me if the Jubilee weekend wasn't tough. Sitting around, barbecuing and yacking with mates just begs for a beer. Still, another tough weekend just means it's a bit easier to tough out the next one. I'm about ten days off a big walking holiday too, so there's a real incentive to keep exercising, stay fit, healthy and hydrated and get there in one piece. I'm joining a group, but holidaying solo, so it's easier to just tell people I don't drink, rather than having to explain the whole rationale over and over, as I've had to with friends and one particularly obsessive neighbour, who always wants to know if I'm still not drinking and pretty much refuses to go to the pub for a "pint" if I'm not having beer.

Anyway, consistently under 75kg now, which is good and over 100 days, which is even better. Keep up the good work folks.

Well Smitters you've done/doing bloody well!

The walking holiday sounds excellent...where to?

I was in Cornwall last week and found it very difficult to stay sober! Lol. I was at an all time low when the awning on the side of the caravan had been virtually ripped off bending/breaking all the poles in the process. Wrestling with it in gale force winds pushed me near the edge, lol.

I did a couple of things which I probably wouldn't have done if I were still drinking though, one was 'Coasteering' found myself jumping off 20' cliffs into the sea with a wet suit and flotation device and helmet on...the best fun ever! I also managed to get a night in on my bike camping solo. Really good apart from constant rain Still, 25 miles on the bike and really enjoyed it. My cycle fitness is gradually raising for sure.

Still finding it tough with the OH drinking in front of me. I think it's what could make me start again. She's polite with it, but none the less it's open in the fridge and some times I nearly just pour a glass to almost kill the stupid feeling of 'not having'. Not sure I can do a lot about it tbh.

Nick

[Smitters]

nick_j007 said:

Well Smitters you've done/doing bloody well!

The walking holiday sounds excellent...where to?

Cheers Nick. There are tough times for sure, but having lost nigh on two stone the evidence is sitting right in front of me (or not, as the case may be!) that this is the right decision. I have enough reminders the call on that help me through the tough bits now and I think the most positive thing is that the folks on this thread tend to to pop up, talk about how it was tough and they got through and carry on. Basically we're winning!

I think one of the oddities is indeed watching other people drink. For me, I just didn't realise that with every drink the volume rises and the crap starts to pour out. When I'm grumpy, I can't think of a place I'd like to be less than the pub. It's just embarrassing to be around, both in the moment and also because it reminds me what I must have been like. How ironic then that nobody seems to pay the slightest bit of attention to it, because most people in the place are in a similar state. I'd liken it to how smokers and non-smokers smell smoke. I know of a smoker who swears their house and car don't smell of the ciggies. They reek, but there's no telling them! Of course in reality it's all harmless banter, but I can't help but think that the solutions, walk away or get drunk, aren't particularly palatable from my point of view! Of course, it's different when there's just the two of us and my wife has said that she actively avoids drinking in front of me, or suggesting going to pubs, but I've actually told her not to do that. I'd rather get used to it, however hard it is now.

Sounds like the hols were, er, challenging. Good work wrestling the awning, leaping off cliffs and especially doing a self-supported bike ride. I've always fancied doing the same, but never quite got my head around loading up with all the gear. One day I'll get my arse in gear! Actually, on that subject, I did my first bike ride with an average of above 30kph yesterday. Alright, it was 30.5kph, I was only riding for 45 minutes and I nearly died, but there was a proper hill in the middle and once I'd successfully avoided being sick in the neighbour's hedge as I got off the bike, I was well chuffed. There was, quite literally, no way I could have done that six months ago.

Walking wise, I'm off to do a chunk of the Tour de Mont Blanc. Going fast and light with some sections done on buses I should cover about 80% of the lap, which goes all the way round the Mont Blanc Massif, but all in 6 days, instead of the normal 10-11. I've not had any holiday aside from Bank Holidays since early December, so I can't wait.

[swiftpete]

Interesting.. I have never even contemplated giving up the booze before but as I sit here now with an aching head from last nights beer and cognac, it does seem like something maybe I should try for a while. I bet it's a tough habit to break though, I tend to have a drink most nights, usually a few beers, but also whisky and cognac on occasion if I'm in the mood. On nights out I tend to stay away from spirits now and just stick to beer so I don't get too bladdered, but I usually still end up pretty drunk.
Is there an easy way of doing it, or is cold turkey the only method? I can't imagine sitting down to watch Game of Thrones with the OH without a cold beer in hand and I really enjoy the feeling of having a cold one and the beer buzz and relaxation that follows. But I know it's not really good for me, so may as well give abstinence a go for a bit and see how I feel. I haven't read the whole thread, so have any of you got any tips, other than 'Just don't open the fridge you tt'?

[Smitters]

swiftpete said:

Interesting.. I have never even contemplated giving up the booze before but as I sit here now with an aching head from last nights beer and cognac, it does seem like something maybe I should try for a while. I bet it's a tough habit to break though, I tend to have a drink most nights, usually a few beers, but also whisky and cognac on occasion if I'm in the mood. On nights out I tend to stay away from spirits now and just stick to beer so I don't get too bladdered, but I usually still end up pretty drunk.
Is there an easy way of doing it, or is cold turkey the only method? I can't imagine sitting down to watch Game of Thrones with the OH without a cold beer in hand and I really enjoy the feeling of having a cold one and the beer buzz and relaxation that follows. But I know it's not really good for me, so may as well give abstinence a go for a bit and see how I feel. I haven't read the whole thread, so have any of you got any tips, other than 'Just don't open the fridge you tt'?

Greetings fellow "Christ, I'm sick of this bloody headache" PHer...

First bit of advice would be to have a read of the thread. There are quite a few different stories in there, from people who have quit just to see if/show they can, to the likes of nick and I who both agree that for us, trying rules like "only at weekends" or "max of two/three/x tonight" just doesn't cut it when trying to cut down. I certainly took a lot of inspiration from what others have achieved and it's made sticking to my guns easier at times.

I'll be honest, it is tough, but if you find the right incentive/motivator, that makes it much easier. Mine was being sick of how I'd let myself become, which was the "used to" guy. I used to be able to run a half marathon etc etc. I could see myself becoming that fat, balding, slightly greasy guy in the local bar who grumbles on at anyone who would listen about the sort of guy he used to be and the adventures he had. The guy that's there are half five in the evening and by lunchtime at the weekend. Not a pretty image. I had a good long think about where I might end up if I didn't intervene immediately and decided on my course of action, which I'm now around 100 days into implementing. Since mine was partly physically based - i.e. overweight and unfit, I entered the PH Transformation Contest too. So not only do I get the benefit of feeling fresher, more alert and richer - beer is very expensive in large quantities... say you drink 10 pints a week in a pub, at £4 a pint, that's £160 a month straight into your pocket... - but I picked up the exercise and diet aspect and lost quite a bit of weight quite quickly, so I had a visual reminder and reward every time I looked in the mirror.

However, I do quite like the idea of a big sticker on the door that says 'Just don't open the fridge you tt'. I would make getting milk and sausages and things hard though.

My advice would be to have a think about why you want to quit/cut down and how long you want to do it for. Then, to set yourself a target and see if you can reach it. When you find it hard, having already figured the reasons why, and understood some of the positives you might get out of it, you'll have some incentives to motivate you forwards and through the tough times.

Above all, good luck, and remember to post back often so we can be virtual voyeurs supportive.