365 days without booze... join me?

365 days without booze... join me?

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Discussion

Blib

44,173 posts

198 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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First task....

Get to bed tonight without having a drink, then you're on your way.

thumbup

zetec

4,468 posts

252 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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Get rid of the beers in your house so the same thing doesn't happen today.

kevinon

812 posts

61 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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Trophy Husband said:
I'm stopping today.

I'm fed up of feeling half cock, sleeping poorly, getting ratty with my family. All whilst trying to run a business.

My consumption over lockdown has crept up to unhealthy levels.

The crunch came last night when my 9 year old son was waiting with a beer for me when I got in from work.

Any tips and support would be much appreciated.
Your boy's action sounds like a real motivator for you. A tip - can you access what it is exactly you are moving towards? Bearing in minds I have no kids, so I'm being imaginative here, But . . . ."Being a Dad is hard at times, and I want to do my best, so I will be a sober Dad, and have no regrets"

My own motivations might be - "I'm a man who can face up to the hopes, fears, grief and joy of being alive on my own. And I WANT to feel these things as they are, rather than blur them with alcohol".

You sound like a busy man, so it may take a while for the underlying motivations to emerge. But my tip is to frame them in what you are moving TOWARDS; for me the language of away from / 'giving up' does not reflect me at all.

To put that in perspective - when I have friends drinking around me I have no feelings of 'missing out'. Nor do I judge them. Like when I see smokers outside a building, I don't wish I was a smoker. HTH. and PM anytime.

Smitters

4,004 posts

158 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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Trophy Husband said:
I'm stopping today.

I'm fed up of feeling half cock, sleeping poorly, getting ratty with my family. All whilst trying to run a business.

My consumption over lockdown has crept up to unhealthy levels.

The crunch came last night when my 9 year old son was waiting with a beer for me when I got in from work.

Any tips and support would be much appreciated.
Good on you. My first tip would be to hold on to not just the image of your son holding the beer, but how it made you feel. I'm sure you can file it in the "I don't want to ever feel this again." drawer. It's a powerful one.

My other more general tip would be to try and avoid perfection and the term "forever". Results and success, whatever those may mean to you personally comes out of process in my experience. So set the challenge at attainable levels and don't be hard on yourself if you do have a beer in the future - just reset the counter and go again. If you did nine days and had a beer on the tenth day, that's still 90% beer free. Look on the bright side and don't use having one as an excuse to have loads.

I did a week, which became a month, which became three months and so on. That was Feb 20th, 2012.

Definitely dip in here for support too. It's not a very PH thread, in that it's generally non-combative, supportive and non-judgmental.

HairyMaclary

3,671 posts

196 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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Trophy Husband said:
I'm stopping today.

I'm fed up of feeling half cock, sleeping poorly, getting ratty with my family. All whilst trying to run a business.

My consumption over lockdown has crept up to unhealthy levels.

The crunch came last night when my 9 year old son was waiting with a beer for me when I got in from work.

Any tips and support would be much appreciated.
Good for you. Take it one day at a time.

I tried for a couple of days, a week, then two, then a month, then till my birthday at 100 days etc. Always one day at a time and always reflecting that I don't ever want to feel like I did back in the lead up to my day one.

I suggest getting some quit lit. There are lots of books written from both the male and female perspective and from differing degrees of dispare.

I read loads in the first months. I found it comforting to know I wasn't alone (this thread is good for that too), but most books lay out how to deal with changes throughout the journey, situations and challenges etc.

Good luck!

HairyMaclary

3,671 posts

196 months

Wednesday 5th May 2021
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kevinon said:
"I'm a man who can face up to the hopes, fears, grief and joy of being alive on my own. And I WANT to feel these things as they are, rather than blur them with alcohol".
Thanks for posting that couldn't put it better myself. Really hit home today smile

funinhounslow

1,630 posts

143 months

Thursday 6th May 2021
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Trophy Husband said:
Any tips and support would be much appreciated.
1 Read The Easy Way to Control Alcohol by Allen Carr and/or Kick The Drink Easily by Jason Vale

(I read the Carr book in a couple of days in 2012 and haven't touched a drop since - and haven't wanted to...)

2 Get a Soda Stream - seriously! Especially with summer coming (hopefully!) it's nice to have cold fizzy water on tap.

3 Be prepared for serious sugar cravings as your body adjusts

4 Slightly longer term think what you will do with the money and time you free up. You will likely be pleasantly surprised by an increase in disposable money and time, so "reward" yourself. I learned to scuba dive and started to volunteer in a museum.


Promised Land

4,734 posts

210 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Day 365 today, not one sniff, craving, urge for a sip.

In fact when in company of someone drinking it makes me feel sick inside now just looking at a pint.

Never again for me, here’s to the next year. thumbup

ETA. Just found my original post I did a week or two into this, how time flies. smile

Edited by Promised Land on Saturday 8th May 09:05

Smitters

4,004 posts

158 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Promised Land said:
Day 365 today, not one sniff, craving, urge for a sip.

In fact when in company of someone drinking it makes me feel sick inside now just looking at a pint.

Never again for me, here’s to the next year. thumbup

ETA. Just found my original post I did a week or two into this, how time flies. smile

Edited by Promised Land on Saturday 8th May 09:05
Well done.

Caddyshack

10,829 posts

207 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Promised Land said:
Day 365 today, not one sniff, craving, urge for a sip.

In fact when in company of someone drinking it makes me feel sick inside now just looking at a pint.

Never again for me, here’s to the next year. thumbup

ETA. Just found my original post I did a week or two into this, how time flies. smile

Edited by Promised Land on Saturday 8th May 09:05
Well done sir...I am 1 yr and 5 months now and have very similar feelings. Almost fell sorry for drunk people slurring their words and stumbling around...that was me not too long ago.

Blib

44,173 posts

198 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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You seem to have reached the Promised Land, Promised Land.

biggrin

Joscal

2,079 posts

201 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Promised Land said:
Day 365 today, not one sniff, craving, urge for a sip.

In fact when in company of someone drinking it makes me feel sick inside now just looking at a pint.

Never again for me, here’s to the next year. thumbup

ETA. Just found my original post I did a week or two into this, how time flies. smile

Edited by Promised Land on Saturday 8th May 09:05
Really well done.

kevinon

812 posts

61 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Blib said:
You seem to have reached the Promised Land, Promised Land.

biggrin
Ahhh, so right. When the switch flips, and you really have no desire for alcohol, it is the promised land, not a hardship at all.

Promised Land

4,734 posts

210 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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kevinon said:
Blib said:
You seem to have reached the Promised Land, Promised Land.

biggrin
Ahhh, so right. When the switch flips, and you really have no desire for alcohol, it is the promised land, not a hardship at all.
I’ve never been a regular 3/4 times a week drinker (apart from teenage,early 20s years) but when I did drink I didn’t know when to stop, usually pre and after football, too much of a routine.

Then my accident on VE Day brought it all home and I decided that was it, last night with a mate and he had 4 or 5 pints and I looked at it and thought I don’t fancy a taste of that one bit.

You feel good in yourself too, odd feeling really.


Caddyshack

10,829 posts

207 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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I could tell today that pubs are getting back to normal, I live in a very quiet village but on my way out this evening I saw one bloke asleep on the side of the road going to Farnham, a couple arguing in the street and a bloke staggering around who could barely walk. On the way back the bloke that was asleep was wandering around on the grass verge by a derestricted road gesturing to all the cars whizzing by.....booze has a lot to answer for in day to day life.

Joscal

2,079 posts

201 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Caddyshack said:
I could tell today that pubs are getting back to normal, I live in a very quiet village but on my way out this evening I saw one bloke asleep on the side of the road going to Farnham, a couple arguing in the street and a bloke staggering around who could barely walk. On the way back the bloke that was asleep was wandering around on the grass verge by a derestricted road gesturing to all the cars whizzing by.....booze has a lot to answer for in day to day life.
It’s crazy isn’t it! I’m a massive hypocrite as I used to get that drunk regularly although only in the house but it’s just nuts how bad it is when you take a step back and look at it.

I was in A&E a few weeks ago on a Wednesday afternoon and drunks were being wheeled in with all sorts of drink related injuries screaming and generally making complete idiots of themselves.

The staff in hospitals deserve medals.

Caddyshack

10,829 posts

207 months

Saturday 8th May 2021
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Joscal said:
Caddyshack said:
I could tell today that pubs are getting back to normal, I live in a very quiet village but on my way out this evening I saw one bloke asleep on the side of the road going to Farnham, a couple arguing in the street and a bloke staggering around who could barely walk. On the way back the bloke that was asleep was wandering around on the grass verge by a derestricted road gesturing to all the cars whizzing by.....booze has a lot to answer for in day to day life.
It’s crazy isn’t it! I’m a massive hypocrite as I used to get that drunk regularly although only in the house but it’s just nuts how bad it is when you take a step back and look at it.

I was in A&E a few weeks ago on a Wednesday afternoon and drunks were being wheeled in with all sorts of drink related injuries screaming and generally making complete idiots of themselves.

The staff in hospitals deserve medals.
Yes, A&E was very quiet during proper lock down, my friend who works there said it was an amazing difference without all the weekend drunks.

FatManJim

90 posts

38 months

Sunday 9th May 2021
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I’m starting today, I haven’t been feeling great recently in the head, I don’t drink every day just a couple of times a week but when I do I get smashed and it’s making things worst for me.

Day 1....

grumbledoak

31,545 posts

234 months

Sunday 9th May 2021
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Nine years ago today, my calendar tells me. That went quickly. yikes

HairyMaclary

3,671 posts

196 months

Sunday 9th May 2021
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Well done to those starting the journey and also those hitting milestones.

I sat with some so called friends in the pub garden yesterday. Cold and windy.. . No desire to drink but lots of questions about my soberiety. One so called mate doing the 'why don't you drink but only at the weekends like me' line. Ffs yeah mate I tried that. Plus the I can take it or leave it brigade - sinking their 7th pint and sitting on a drink drive conviction.

Felt grateful to be where I currently am as I drove myself home but there is a reason why Ive given some of these acquaintances a swerve recently.