Discussion
johnwilliams77 said:
Have you read this book?
https://www.amazon.com/Lost-Connections-Uncovering...
Its incredible and a product of many tens years research in one place. Fantastic to read..
It will help you make your own mind up on pills and councilling
I haven't , no.https://www.amazon.com/Lost-Connections-Uncovering...
Its incredible and a product of many tens years research in one place. Fantastic to read..
It will help you make your own mind up on pills and councilling
Always questioned the self help type books.
Plus I hate reading! haha
98elise said:
I would be interested to hear how you get on with the private sessions. We're looking my at that for my son who suffers with depression and anxiety, and my daughter who has social anxiety.
The NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
I will keep you updatedThe NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
Think my "first" proper session is a week Tuesday.
xjay1337 said:
I haven't , no.
Always questioned the self help type books.
Plus I hate reading! haha
It's less about self help and more about his analysis of cause of depression.Always questioned the self help type books.
Plus I hate reading! haha
Start with the joe rogan video in that case. Good luck.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQUgd9GQtoQ&t=...
xjay1337 said:
How is everyone getting on?
After trying the NHS / CBT stuff I am now trying a private therapist.
No idea what to expect. Had one introductory meeting in the week and will be seeing again properly for the first session next week.
I was against it but my Mrs sort of strong-armed me into going, it's her way of trying to help, she is paying for the first few sessions.
Been weaning myself off prozac , feeling no different, just as miserable as without
Living a joyless existence but I’m used to it now. Good luck with the sessions, I hope they have a positive outcome.After trying the NHS / CBT stuff I am now trying a private therapist.
No idea what to expect. Had one introductory meeting in the week and will be seeing again properly for the first session next week.
I was against it but my Mrs sort of strong-armed me into going, it's her way of trying to help, she is paying for the first few sessions.
Been weaning myself off prozac , feeling no different, just as miserable as without
xjay1337 said:
98elise said:
I would be interested to hear how you get on with the private sessions. We're looking my at that for my son who suffers with depression and anxiety, and my daughter who has social anxiety.
The NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
I will keep you updatedThe NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
Think my "first" proper session is a week Tuesday.
The therapist we're looking at does CBT and Hypnotherapy.
227bhp said:
Not looking good for the self help books is it....
Self help books normally do a lot more for the authors than the readers. The ones I've read tend to have the same basic underlying message. "Only think about what you can control, ignore what you can't control, enjoy the moment as much as you can and appreciate the people and things around you that you love."Developing a consistent approach to life's tribulations seems to be the key to keeping despairing thoughts at bay. The old hellenistic philosophies had some tried and tested methods and ways of approaching life. I'd probably point people in the direction of Senaca, Aurelius, Epictetus etc. Pretty much every self help book has, at it's core, a philosophy of life that any Stoic scholar would recognise.
The Lost Connections book is, at it's heart a Stoic piece of writing.
RTB said:
227bhp said:
Not looking good for the self help books is it....
Self help books normally do a lot more for the authors than the readers. The ones I've read tend to have the same basic underlying message. "Only think about what you can control, ignore what you can't control, enjoy the moment as much as you can and appreciate the people and things around you that you love."Developing a consistent approach to life's tribulations seems to be the key to keeping despairing thoughts at bay. The old hellenistic philosophies had some tried and tested methods and ways of approaching life. I'd probably point people in the direction of Senaca, Aurelius, Epictetus etc. Pretty much every self help book has, at it's core, a philosophy of life that any Stoic scholar would recognise.
The Lost Connections book is, at it's heart a Stoic piece of writing.
227bhp said:
Yes there is something to be said there, do you mean like religion? My mother (who is a lifer) was (in amongst moaning about everything) saying she couldn't understand her best friend who is into religion and believes in God. Her friend (in total contrast) is always cheerful and upbeat.
Religion does offer some useful tools for dealing with life's tribulations, along with a lot of excess baggage that is often quite harmful. I know of several religious people who seem very well adjusted. They've chosen which bits they like and ignore the harmful bits, which seems very sensible. You can take that approach with any philosophy, there's no need for a supernatural element to give some meaning. Watched this over the weekend and helped make sense of things. Not that it's cured me or anything close but found it useful/interesting.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aw1oLtuJOXQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aw1oLtuJOXQ
Well I've done 9 weeks of CBT for depression and anxiety, thought it was going relatively well in terms of understanding root causes, thought patterns etc.. only to be told in today's session that there's not much more CBT can do to help me 
Last week my CBT therapist did some Aspergers / Autism tests that scored in the region to warrant a referral. That actually went through really quick and I'm seeing my GP on Wednesday for their initial assessment.
Therapist is going to see me one last time in 2 weeks just to follow up the GP appointment and wrap things up, and refer me to another type of therapy, 'Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy' - which she says there's around 1 year waiting list for.
I feel like I'm back to square one, all I have to fall back on is the medication I'm currently taking,, genuinely don't think I can last another year.
Last week my CBT therapist did some Aspergers / Autism tests that scored in the region to warrant a referral. That actually went through really quick and I'm seeing my GP on Wednesday for their initial assessment.
Therapist is going to see me one last time in 2 weeks just to follow up the GP appointment and wrap things up, and refer me to another type of therapy, 'Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy' - which she says there's around 1 year waiting list for.
I feel like I'm back to square one, all I have to fall back on is the medication I'm currently taking,, genuinely don't think I can last another year.
smithyithy said:
I feel like I'm back to square one, all I have to fall back on is the medication I'm currently taking,, genuinely don't think I can last another year.
I don't know you from Tom, nor am I aware of the context of your situation. But I feel like I need to tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how faint. There's a path for everyone out of depression, I really do believe that. You just need to not give up and find yours.
You said CBT was helping. I'm sure your therapist has provided you with a number of tools and methods over the course of those weeks that you can add to your arsenal and continue to use in day to day life. Just because they have nothing more to offer you doesn't mean you can't continue to use whatever you learnt. It doesn't meant they stop being effective.
as part of your cbt did you get access to their online portal?
as if so while you may not be able to see your cbt counsellor you could self-study / re-cover topics at your own pace online?
Think my "first" proper session is a week Tuesday.Thanks. Could you post it on here rather than email. My email account on PH is an old one I no longer have access to, and it can't be changed on my profile.
The therapist we're looking at does CBT and Hypnotherapy.Had the first session yesterday... not sure what to make of it.
So far she was just running through my life and what not. her set up is weird but nice, basically a very plush shed in her back garden.
Apparently she says some peoples "baseline moods" or something are just generally lower and it may be that is the case for me.
And that I seem to be fairly well controlled in terms of what my triggers are but we need to explore more... Of course we do at £50/hr.
I've given myself 4 sessions to test it out see what goes on and I'll decide from how it's going if i continue or not.
So next session is in a couple of weeks
So far it is nice to just have someone to listen to you ramble on about things without the judgement you get from friends / family / mrs and get a perspective on things. but i readily spot my behaviour (Ie when I'm getting anxious or when i am being stupid i'm aware of it and do things to try and get back on track) so not sure what extra help she can really be? maybe i'm looking for an answer that doesn't exist.
I'm also struggling with the mrs, normally we are fine but at the moment her temper is very short which she doesn't openly realise and once she has gotten herself upset it's very hard to calm her down or get her out of the trail of thought... this leaves me feeling stuck in a situation as i don't know what to do and can't escape
I would like to talk this through with the therapist but as My mrs was the one who paid for the first few sessions for me directly (is appreciated , her way of helping me) I feel that I can't bring that up!
oh wells
it is a first world problem to have, the sun is shining so life can't be that bad!
as if so while you may not be able to see your cbt counsellor you could self-study / re-cover topics at your own pace online?
98elise said:
xjay1337 said:
98elise said:
I would be interested to hear how you get on with the private sessions. We're looking my at that for my son who suffers with depression and anxiety, and my daughter who has social anxiety.
The NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
I will keep you updatedThe NHS treatment has been minimal and useless.
Think my "first" proper session is a week Tuesday.
The therapist we're looking at does CBT and Hypnotherapy.
So far she was just running through my life and what not. her set up is weird but nice, basically a very plush shed in her back garden.
Apparently she says some peoples "baseline moods" or something are just generally lower and it may be that is the case for me.
And that I seem to be fairly well controlled in terms of what my triggers are but we need to explore more... Of course we do at £50/hr.
I've given myself 4 sessions to test it out see what goes on and I'll decide from how it's going if i continue or not.
So next session is in a couple of weeks
So far it is nice to just have someone to listen to you ramble on about things without the judgement you get from friends / family / mrs and get a perspective on things. but i readily spot my behaviour (Ie when I'm getting anxious or when i am being stupid i'm aware of it and do things to try and get back on track) so not sure what extra help she can really be? maybe i'm looking for an answer that doesn't exist.
I'm also struggling with the mrs, normally we are fine but at the moment her temper is very short which she doesn't openly realise and once she has gotten herself upset it's very hard to calm her down or get her out of the trail of thought... this leaves me feeling stuck in a situation as i don't know what to do and can't escape
I would like to talk this through with the therapist but as My mrs was the one who paid for the first few sessions for me directly (is appreciated , her way of helping me) I feel that I can't bring that up!
oh wells
it is a first world problem to have, the sun is shining so life can't be that bad!Edited by xjay1337 on Tuesday 30th April 10:21
xjay1337 said:
I would like to talk this through with the therapist but as My mrs was the one who paid for the first few sessions for me directly (is appreciated , her way of helping me) I feel that I can't bring that up!
oh wells it is a first world problem to have, the sun is shining so life can't be that bad!
Please feel free to talk about anything with your therapist, holding bits back won't help overall - I realise that talking about issues with your wife might feel like a betrayal but it should come out if it needs to. Good luck oh wells
it is a first world problem to have, the sun is shining so life can't be that bad!Love him or loathe him, this is WELL worth a watch, if you're suffering with depression.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0005btv/ala...
https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0005btv/ala...
We're bombarded by messages from Social media, TV, radio, magazines et al, all telling us we should be happy 100% of the time, and if we're not, there's something wrong. I take a great deal of solace from the Stoics. They had it just about right when it comes to life, 99% of the time it's going to be s
t and difficult. And be thankful for the 1% where you might find some peace. And don't ever search for happiness, peace is the best you can hope for. And actually, I'm fine with that.
But before you can do that, you have to remove yourself from a toxic environment, so switch off your social media and use your phone for making calls, and nothing else. And spend more time having face to face conversations with real people in the real world, and making genuine connections.
And if anyone tells, be it in person, or in a self help book, that fear and anxiety are anything but normal, they are lying to you. There are very good evolutionary reasons for the fear and anxiety mechanisms. They are agents for change. Rather than try and dull them with pills, embrace them as a force for change.
Diet and exercise are crucial too. Cut out the refined carbs and opt for wholefoods, with plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. And exercise every day, even if it's only a walk.
t and difficult. And be thankful for the 1% where you might find some peace. And don't ever search for happiness, peace is the best you can hope for. And actually, I'm fine with that.But before you can do that, you have to remove yourself from a toxic environment, so switch off your social media and use your phone for making calls, and nothing else. And spend more time having face to face conversations with real people in the real world, and making genuine connections.
And if anyone tells, be it in person, or in a self help book, that fear and anxiety are anything but normal, they are lying to you. There are very good evolutionary reasons for the fear and anxiety mechanisms. They are agents for change. Rather than try and dull them with pills, embrace them as a force for change.
Diet and exercise are crucial too. Cut out the refined carbs and opt for wholefoods, with plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. And exercise every day, even if it's only a walk.
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