Effing cancer is an effing effer, frankly
Discussion
aclivity said:
What does, what should one say at a Christmas meal?
We lost my dad in March this year, my mum and brother, as well as his daughter and the in-laws, are coming to us on Christmas day.
I want to say something, but what does one say? I don't want a formal "grace" as some of the guests aren't particularly religious. I don't want to say too much, but I need to say something?
Why not simply raise a glass to 'loved ones'? You can add something like near and far, here and gone, or past and present or something if you like, but don't - really don't - be tempted to say nothing in case you 'get it wrong'. There is no wrong, and it would be a lovely thing to do. We lost my dad in March this year, my mum and brother, as well as his daughter and the in-laws, are coming to us on Christmas day.
I want to say something, but what does one say? I don't want a formal "grace" as some of the guests aren't particularly religious. I don't want to say too much, but I need to say something?
Back in January I posted a link as we were raising money for a school project in memory of a friend who'd passed away.
The project is complete and what was a plan to kit out one classroom, has built whole rooms. Dave didn't want his name on the project but asked for his favourite quote to be pained up instead.
Hopefully this link works:
If not:
Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.
Tennessee Williams
The project is complete and what was a plan to kit out one classroom, has built whole rooms. Dave didn't want his name on the project but asked for his favourite quote to be pained up instead.
Hopefully this link works:
If not:
Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.
Tennessee Williams
Riley Blue said:
For us, it's simply a toast to "Absent family and friends." which includes all four of our parents and several good friends no longer with us.
Likewise. Various beloved parents / grandparents have gone over the years and whenever we raise a glass at family gatherings, it's always simply to 'absent friends' - I don't think you ever need to say any more. Just found this thread and I am sorry to everyone going through it.
After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted. She actually passed out when she heard the news. I came home and was physically sick with shock and worry.
She also admitted that she is scared and I will say that I am too.
Sorry if I keep adding things: She has lost 4 stone in less than six months and at the moment keeps sicking everything up but has been put on a high fat high calorie diet to allow her to start chemo treatment depending on what the result of the biopsy says.
After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted. She actually passed out when she heard the news. I came home and was physically sick with shock and worry.
She also admitted that she is scared and I will say that I am too.
Sorry if I keep adding things: She has lost 4 stone in less than six months and at the moment keeps sicking everything up but has been put on a high fat high calorie diet to allow her to start chemo treatment depending on what the result of the biopsy says.
Edited by Morningside on Monday 12th January 20:12
Morningside said:
Just found this thread and I am sorry to everyone going through it.
After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted.
But this...!
So sad to read this. it's just the most awful news.After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted.
But this...!
Edit. Being scared is normal as is being terrified. One day , one moment at a time. We plan for the worst, hope for the best and live every day eyes wide open.
Edited by drivin_me_nuts on Monday 12th January 20:19
Morningside said:
Just found this thread and I am sorry to everyone going through it.
After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted. She actually passed out when she heard the news. I came home and was physically sick with shock and worry.
She also admitted that she is scared and I will say that I am too.
Sorry if I keep adding things: She has lost 4 stone in less than six months and at the moment keeps sicking everything up but has been put on a high fat high calorie diet to allow her to start chemo treatment depending on what the result of the biopsy says.
Really sorry to read. My thoughts are with you both.After about a year of hell my wife has just been diagnosed with inoperable gall bladder cancer that has now spread to the liver, stomach, part of bowel and lymph nodes. Without anything being said I think we are talking months. Biopsy done today and she had two stents put into her bile duct a couple of days ago as the cancer is pushing against it.
Hopefully she can come home this week.
Its a real shock and we never expected this. To be honest I thought I would have lost her from a heart attack as she has always had heart problems and has four stents fitted. She actually passed out when she heard the news. I came home and was physically sick with shock and worry.
She also admitted that she is scared and I will say that I am too.
Sorry if I keep adding things: She has lost 4 stone in less than six months and at the moment keeps sicking everything up but has been put on a high fat high calorie diet to allow her to start chemo treatment depending on what the result of the biopsy says.
Edited by Morningside on Monday 12th January 20:12
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