Discussion
dav123a said:
It's good to hear from different perspectives , I'm a little better today , trying to get more exercise in. Thanks for the offer , I'm going to try what I've read up on . I may PM you if I get lost with it.
Good luck. Don't give up especially on the mindfulness. Once you figure it out, it's a bit like Martini but with no hot blonde on skates - any time, any place, anywhere.Downward said:
Thing is it’s like you can’t enjoy Life because everything you do leads back to the anxiety.
Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
It does make life joyless , I can sympathize with that. I'm not sure how much advice I could give you , I feel I'm looking at the right road but not quite on it yet. Maybe have a read of different blogs , I've found calmclinic. com some help. Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
ok i'm awake...
tried typing out some of the reasons why my anxiety started and came back again but didn't want this to turn into a long post and trying to explain complex issues in brief is never my forte, so the details only:
i was diagnosed with GAD and it also caused periods of acute depression. i saw a therapist privately every week for 4-5mths and never felt like i got anywhere. as such i asked to see the clinical psychiatrist and was prescribed antidepressants. can't remember which ones but they were aimed at improving circadian rythym. this coincided with me going away for 3mths on a work project and they absolutely zombied me on a morning so i stopped taking them. this was about 1.5-2yrs ago.
recently, events have transpired that these old anxieties have come back, largely without me realising and hence wreaking havoc on my personal life. i simply can't allow it to continue.
saw a different psychiatrist last week for an intro session where we discussed my history and how he thought we should proceed. he was very sharp and insightful, seemed to grasp the issues very quickly and matter of fact. this approach works well with me, i don't want to spend hours talking with someone asking me 'how does that make you feel' every 2 minutes.
so today i have my first proper session with him. all i know is that it's 2 hours, will include a full medical, and that the first phase of treatment will see me on medication. once the immediate trauma is taken away and i'm feeling 'normal' then he will transition to talking therapies with his pyschologist colleague, which might include things like CBT etc. he says getting well with meds is the easy part, long term mental health without them is much harder. he did say that anxiety is largely a learned behaviour/response and, as such, can be unlearned.
in tandem with this, i'm doing a lot of reading around emotional intelligence. i went to a workshop on this last night at a local 'spiritual' centre but found the lecturer to be excellent and came away with some good learning points. i'm going back to the same centre this evening for a meditation session. not sure if meditation is for me but i'll give it a go. i'd also like to try mindfulness.
i'm trying to understand myself better, improve my EQ and of course take any steps i can to reduce the anxiety and emotional chaos which is holding me back.
tried typing out some of the reasons why my anxiety started and came back again but didn't want this to turn into a long post and trying to explain complex issues in brief is never my forte, so the details only:
i was diagnosed with GAD and it also caused periods of acute depression. i saw a therapist privately every week for 4-5mths and never felt like i got anywhere. as such i asked to see the clinical psychiatrist and was prescribed antidepressants. can't remember which ones but they were aimed at improving circadian rythym. this coincided with me going away for 3mths on a work project and they absolutely zombied me on a morning so i stopped taking them. this was about 1.5-2yrs ago.
recently, events have transpired that these old anxieties have come back, largely without me realising and hence wreaking havoc on my personal life. i simply can't allow it to continue.
saw a different psychiatrist last week for an intro session where we discussed my history and how he thought we should proceed. he was very sharp and insightful, seemed to grasp the issues very quickly and matter of fact. this approach works well with me, i don't want to spend hours talking with someone asking me 'how does that make you feel' every 2 minutes.
so today i have my first proper session with him. all i know is that it's 2 hours, will include a full medical, and that the first phase of treatment will see me on medication. once the immediate trauma is taken away and i'm feeling 'normal' then he will transition to talking therapies with his pyschologist colleague, which might include things like CBT etc. he says getting well with meds is the easy part, long term mental health without them is much harder. he did say that anxiety is largely a learned behaviour/response and, as such, can be unlearned.
in tandem with this, i'm doing a lot of reading around emotional intelligence. i went to a workshop on this last night at a local 'spiritual' centre but found the lecturer to be excellent and came away with some good learning points. i'm going back to the same centre this evening for a meditation session. not sure if meditation is for me but i'll give it a go. i'd also like to try mindfulness.
i'm trying to understand myself better, improve my EQ and of course take any steps i can to reduce the anxiety and emotional chaos which is holding me back.
I was having a read through this on the way to work today-it’s not especially in depth but was useful to me, so I thought I’d share it 
https://www.mind.org.uk/media/34633809/anxiety-201...
https://www.mind.org.uk/media/34633809/anxiety-201...
dav123a said:
Downward said:
Thing is it’s like you can’t enjoy Life because everything you do leads back to the anxiety.
Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
It does make life joyless , I can sympathize with that. I'm not sure how much advice I could give you , I feel I'm looking at the right road but not quite on it yet. Maybe have a read of different blogs , I've found calmclinic. com some help. Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
shirt said:
in tandem with this, i'm doing a lot of reading around emotional intelligence. i went to a workshop on this last night at a local 'spiritual' centre but found the lecturer to be excellent and came away with some good learning points. i'm going back to the same centre this evening for a meditation session. not sure if meditation is for me but i'll give it a go. i'd also like to try mindfulness.
Call it brain training not meditation or mindfulness. It allows you to observe your thoughts and choose new ones. Whatever you do and whatever you think, the more you do it, the more you will do it. So if you let yourself ruminate, you are training yourself to ruminate more. If you train yourself to observe your thoughts (not just think your thoughts) and then train yourself to change focus (eg to the breath), you will get better at doing that and therefore stopping the ruminating.
And it's not just sitting on a cushion with your eyes closed.
Yesterday, I was playing a tennis match for my club's league. I realised that my topspin backhand just wasn't working with my new racket and during the match wasn't the right time to fix it. Thanks to mindfulness, I was able to make the decision to switch to my reliable backhand slice everytime the ball moved to my backhand and stopped planting the ball into the net.
It's a powerful tool that I can now use even in the most "stressful" situations to bring myself calm and focus.
Hoofy said:
dav123a said:
Downward said:
Thing is it’s like you can’t enjoy Life because everything you do leads back to the anxiety.
Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
It does make life joyless , I can sympathize with that. I'm not sure how much advice I could give you , I feel I'm looking at the right road but not quite on it yet. Maybe have a read of different blogs , I've found calmclinic. com some help. Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
@Hoofy
That’s what I’m hoping for. My aim with EQ and mindfulness is to be able to observe and rationalise my thoughts and resultant behaviors. I’ve already identified that I am prone to overthinking and agonizing over emotional processes and can then get so caught up in my own s
t that I neglect the thoughts and feelings of others. Because if the speed at which my mind works, I’m also prone to interrupting people and doing their thinking for them.
You mentioned you have a link to a mindfulness course? I’ll pm you when I get home.
NB, I didn’t make the meditation as I’m full of cold. Did see the psychiatrist this morning and have been prescribed 3 different meds to be phased in strength over the coming weeks. Don’t have them in front of me and can’t remember what they’re called but as I live in Dubai and they’re highly controlled substances, I can tell you they were a right pain in the arse to get from the pharmacy!
That’s what I’m hoping for. My aim with EQ and mindfulness is to be able to observe and rationalise my thoughts and resultant behaviors. I’ve already identified that I am prone to overthinking and agonizing over emotional processes and can then get so caught up in my own s
t that I neglect the thoughts and feelings of others. Because if the speed at which my mind works, I’m also prone to interrupting people and doing their thinking for them. You mentioned you have a link to a mindfulness course? I’ll pm you when I get home.
NB, I didn’t make the meditation as I’m full of cold. Did see the psychiatrist this morning and have been prescribed 3 different meds to be phased in strength over the coming weeks. Don’t have them in front of me and can’t remember what they’re called but as I live in Dubai and they’re highly controlled substances, I can tell you they were a right pain in the arse to get from the pharmacy!
I had a tough time last year for a few reasons and ended up having the below online mindfulness course recommended. It's not an instant cure and does take time and commitment but it helped me a lot at that time:
https://www.bemindfulonline.com/
The mistake I have made since (as Hoofy has mentioned above) is to let it slip out of my every day routine. And it really is something in my (limited) experience that needs to be practiced regularly to have any real impact. I can feel some issues starting again recently so I am making a new concerted effort to make time every day for mindfulness. There are loads of apps available to help with this as well - I have found Insight Timer a good one.
Good luck.
https://www.bemindfulonline.com/
The mistake I have made since (as Hoofy has mentioned above) is to let it slip out of my every day routine. And it really is something in my (limited) experience that needs to be practiced regularly to have any real impact. I can feel some issues starting again recently so I am making a new concerted effort to make time every day for mindfulness. There are loads of apps available to help with this as well - I have found Insight Timer a good one.
Good luck.
Hoofy said:
Let's face it, they're more shelf help than self help. 99% of self help books end up sitting on the shelf, the contents unapplied, the reader unchanged. This is what the keeps the publishing business running.
I teach people how to really make it a part of what you do... like brushing teeth.
Of course, brushing your teeth twice a day doesn't guarantee that you won't get an abscess.
Happy to chat over the phone about things.
Just noticed this, thanks so much for the offer Hoofy I teach people how to really make it a part of what you do... like brushing teeth.
Of course, brushing your teeth twice a day doesn't guarantee that you won't get an abscess.
Happy to chat over the phone about things.
However I'm just too anxious to discuss this over the phone with someone I don't really know well... no offense though!
I'm looking at self help audiobooks as I can listen to them during my long commute. For me I know it's about "retraining" about how I perceive things.
I tend to overthink by clinging onto the negatives.
I stumbled across a podcast/audiobook thing on Spotify and one or two episodes did resonate with me.
dav123a said:
Hoofy said:
dav123a said:
Downward said:
Thing is it’s like you can’t enjoy Life because everything you do leads back to the anxiety.
Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
It does make life joyless , I can sympathize with that. I'm not sure how much advice I could give you , I feel I'm looking at the right road but not quite on it yet. Maybe have a read of different blogs , I've found calmclinic. com some help. Seems like i’m just going through the motions to avoid anxiety and not living my life.
anxious_ant said:
Hoofy said:
Let's face it, they're more shelf help than self help. 99% of self help books end up sitting on the shelf, the contents unapplied, the reader unchanged. This is what the keeps the publishing business running.
I teach people how to really make it a part of what you do... like brushing teeth.
Of course, brushing your teeth twice a day doesn't guarantee that you won't get an abscess.
Happy to chat over the phone about things.
Just noticed this, thanks so much for the offer Hoofy I teach people how to really make it a part of what you do... like brushing teeth.
Of course, brushing your teeth twice a day doesn't guarantee that you won't get an abscess.
Happy to chat over the phone about things.
However I'm just too anxious to discuss this over the phone with someone I don't really know well... no offense though!
I'm looking at self help audiobooks as I can listen to them during my long commute. For me I know it's about "retraining" about how I perceive things.
I tend to overthink by clinging onto the negatives.
I stumbled across a podcast/audiobook thing on Spotify and one or two episodes did resonate with me.
Hoofy said:
Can you tell me more about what goes on with you?
It's anxiety , I have these churning feeling in my stomach . Last couple of years I've thrown myself into work and the house till a point a month or so ago I was burnt out. I'm not sure if this was to cover the anxiety or it came on because of being burnt out. After a bit of a realisation I've stepped back from both but the anxiety has got worse. Like it's filled the space. Some social situations do trigger it , some loud situations ,like parties. Some of the churning is then thinking about avoiding these situations and when the next one might be. People normally I can deal with , part of my job is training , that I can deal with no problem. That's an overview , possibly a bit of a jumble but felt okay to sit and write that out not something I've done up to now. dav123a said:
Hoofy said:
Can you tell me more about what goes on with you?
It's anxiety , I have these churning feeling in my stomach . Last couple of years I've thrown myself into work and the house till a point a month or so ago I was burnt out. I'm not sure if this was to cover the anxiety or it came on because of being burnt out. After a bit of a realisation I've stepped back from both but the anxiety has got worse. Like it's filled the space. Some social situations do trigger it , some loud situations ,like parties. Some of the churning is then thinking about avoiding these situations and when the next one might be. People normally I can deal with , part of my job is training , that I can deal with no problem. That's an overview , possibly a bit of a jumble but felt okay to sit and write that out not something I've done up to now. Hoofy said:
I can't remember if you've tried meditating but as a calming activity, how do you find it?
I haven't as yet it's something I've looked at , I'm making myself set aside some time for my wellbeing . I've started some exercise at home. If you have a link for beginners I'll have look , I'm open to trying it. dav123a said:
Hoofy said:
I can't remember if you've tried meditating but as a calming activity, how do you find it?
I haven't as yet it's something I've looked at , I'm making myself set aside some time for my wellbeing . I've started some exercise at home. If you have a link for beginners I'll have look , I'm open to trying it. Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff