Divorce Question
Discussion
You MUST get a consent order.
This finalises your affairs and stops you going after her or she you in the future. This does happen. You cannot legally finalise your affairs without one. Finalise being the main word.
You in my view should get a lawyer to draw up the consent order. It simply says who gets what. You can only agree child arrangements for a year. Post that she can apply anyway to the Csa etc.
Who files makes little difference and just make the reasons bland. You are trying to divorce not score points etc
This finalises your affairs and stops you going after her or she you in the future. This does happen. You cannot legally finalise your affairs without one. Finalise being the main word.
You in my view should get a lawyer to draw up the consent order. It simply says who gets what. You can only agree child arrangements for a year. Post that she can apply anyway to the Csa etc.
Who files makes little difference and just make the reasons bland. You are trying to divorce not score points etc
EFH189 said:
- does she have to apply for the divorce or can I do so, as it’s a joint decision effectively?
Either. You can fill it out online, it isn't hard.juat be very detailed about the unreasonable behaviour so doesn't get rejected and make sure the other party is happy with the wording too, so they agree to it.£500ish fee
https://www.gov.uk/apply-for-divorce
It might be worth using a service such as https://www.co-oplegalservices.co.uk/family-law-so...
Although they will tick the boxes as you can do, they might pick up on one thing that you regret further down the line.
Although they will tick the boxes as you can do, they might pick up on one thing that you regret further down the line.
Just bear in mind that if she instigates the divorce process, you will have to agree to doing some pretty nasty unreasonable stuff, assuming that she was living with you in the last 2 years. For example, the 'accepted' reasons for a judge to rubber stamp the divorce include admitting to basically being an alcoholic, psychological issues, & various others. I was assured that this does not go on public record, but surely the actual divorce petition gets archived somewhere (??)
Biker 1 said:
Just bear in mind that if she instigates the divorce process, you will have to agree to doing some pretty nasty unreasonable stuff, assuming that she was living with you in the last 2 years. For example, the 'accepted' reasons for a judge to rubber stamp the divorce include admitting to basically being an alcoholic, psychological issues, & various others. I was assured that this does not go on public record, but surely the actual divorce petition gets archived somewhere (??)
That is not the case.GT03ROB said:
That is not the case.
I was under the impression that divorce requires certain reasons to go ahead within 2 years of one of the parties having walked out. I.e. one party instigates proceedings, claiming that the other party has been unreasonable.I could be incorrect, & in which case, pray tell how so??
Biker 1 said:
GT03ROB said:
That is not the case.
I was under the impression that divorce requires certain reasons to go ahead within 2 years of one of the parties having walked out. I.e. one party instigates proceedings, claiming that the other party has been unreasonable.I could be incorrect, & in which case, pray tell how so??
I went the route of least resistance.
We agreed everything at the time (early 2002) and I waited until over 5 years had passed (2007) and then asked her for a divorce so that I could remarry.
I don't remember it being expensive and no solicitor was involved, but as an accountant I am reasonably ok with completing forms.
I supported her throughout until she died in 2012, so I guess there was nothing to argue about really.
As a consequence of my being reasonable, she left her half of our home to me in her will, so perhaps it worked out for the best.
I bought a TVR. And a new home.
We agreed everything at the time (early 2002) and I waited until over 5 years had passed (2007) and then asked her for a divorce so that I could remarry.
I don't remember it being expensive and no solicitor was involved, but as an accountant I am reasonably ok with completing forms.
I supported her throughout until she died in 2012, so I guess there was nothing to argue about really.
As a consequence of my being reasonable, she left her half of our home to me in her will, so perhaps it worked out for the best.
I bought a TVR. And a new home.
QBee said:
I went the route of least resistance.
We agreed everything at the time (early 2002) and I waited until over 5 years had passed (2007) and then asked her for a divorce so that I could remarry.
I don't remember it being expensive and no solicitor was involved, but as an accountant I am reasonably ok with completing forms.
I supported her throughout until she died in 2012, so I guess there was nothing to argue about really.
As a consequence of my being reasonable, she left her half of our home to me in her will, so perhaps it worked out for the best.
I bought a TVR. And a new home.
This is why we need to keep our good Bees alive....We agreed everything at the time (early 2002) and I waited until over 5 years had passed (2007) and then asked her for a divorce so that I could remarry.
I don't remember it being expensive and no solicitor was involved, but as an accountant I am reasonably ok with completing forms.
I supported her throughout until she died in 2012, so I guess there was nothing to argue about really.
As a consequence of my being reasonable, she left her half of our home to me in her will, so perhaps it worked out for the best.
I bought a TVR. And a new home.
Hugo Stiglitz said:
Isn't there a quickie process coming in late this Summer?
Got delayed till next year , target is now April 2022 https://www.lawgazette.co.uk/news/no-fault-divorce...
GT03ROB said:
If 2 parties basically agree to.a divorce, the unreasonable behaviour can be just about anything you want it to be. It most certainly does not have to be anything nasty. You could for example claim snoring, smelly feet, bad breath, preferring to post on PH than talk to your OH….
Wait. What? MadCaptainJack said:
GT03ROB said:
If 2 parties basically agree to.a divorce, the unreasonable behaviour can be just about anything you want it to be. It most certainly does not have to be anything nasty. You could for example claim snoring, smelly feet, bad breath, preferring to post on PH than talk to your OH….
Wait. What? When I divorced my ex wife she went absolutely mental about the mere prospect of me filing on the grounds of adultery. Something along the lines of "Don't you even think about it, I'm not agreeing to that, i'll dispute it, and I don't want the kids reading that one day".
Quite surreal worrying about the 'shame' of adultery when she had just carted our children off to live in a new house with a strange man, no doubt making an inedible impression on their innocent young minds in the process.
My solicitor advised against it as well because of the potential aggro. I went with unreasonable grounds but made sure I cited the fact she was having sex with another man as one of the things I found intolerable
Chozza said:
Hugo Stiglitz said:
Isn't there a quickie process coming in late this Summer?
Got delayed till next year , target is now April 2022 https://www.lawgazette.co.uk/news/no-fault-divorce...
theboss said:
People do get really hung up on the matter of grounds.
When I divorced my ex wife she went absolutely mental about the mere prospect of me filing on the grounds of adultery. Something along the lines of "Don't you even think about it, I'm not agreeing to that, i'll dispute it, and I don't want the kids reading that one day".
Quite surreal worrying about the 'shame' of adultery when she had just carted our children off to live in a new house with a strange man, no doubt making an inedible impression on their innocent young minds in the process.
My solicitor advised against it as well because of the potential aggro. I went with unreasonable grounds but made sure I cited the fact she was having sex with another man as one of the things I found intolerable
The reality is that if there is an argument adultery is a lot harder to prove or argue than unreasonable behaviourWhen I divorced my ex wife she went absolutely mental about the mere prospect of me filing on the grounds of adultery. Something along the lines of "Don't you even think about it, I'm not agreeing to that, i'll dispute it, and I don't want the kids reading that one day".
Quite surreal worrying about the 'shame' of adultery when she had just carted our children off to live in a new house with a strange man, no doubt making an inedible impression on their innocent young minds in the process.
My solicitor advised against it as well because of the potential aggro. I went with unreasonable grounds but made sure I cited the fact she was having sex with another man as one of the things I found intolerable
I instigated the divorce in my situation but I wanted the the official divorce papers to be submitted by my ex as I didn’t have the mental space or money for it at the time. They could have put any amount of unreasonable reasons down and I wouldn’t have cared, I just wanted to be as divorced and away from that as possible.
I doubt me paying for the privilege of listing out all their unreasonable behaviour to go in front of a judge would have made me feel any better about it
I doubt me paying for the privilege of listing out all their unreasonable behaviour to go in front of a judge would have made me feel any better about it
Amateurish said:
Chozza said:
Hugo Stiglitz said:
Isn't there a quickie process coming in late this Summer?
Got delayed till next year , target is now April 2022 https://www.lawgazette.co.uk/news/no-fault-divorce...
hyphen said:
Amateurish said:
Chozza said:
Hugo Stiglitz said:
Isn't there a quickie process coming in late this Summer?
Got delayed till next year , target is now April 2022 https://www.lawgazette.co.uk/news/no-fault-divorce...
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