Alcoholism- Need Help

Author
Discussion

fflyingdog

Original Poster:

621 posts

240 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Ok ,i have a close relative who is an alcoholic and out of control,to the point where we are convinced that he will kill himself or worse someone else .He is not violent but acts stupidly and could endanger someone else .What i need to know if someone here has experience of dealing with this and can actually recommend a Rehab centre through personal experience or some other means.

BoRED S2upid

19,731 posts

241 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Whats the reason hes an alcoholic? Doctor can prescribe drugs that make him sick when the Alcohol hits your stomach but its very often mental, they have to want to stop drinking.

st_files

5,427 posts

182 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
fflyingdog said:
Ok ,i have a close relative who is an alcoholic and out of control,to the point where we are convinced that he will kill himself or worse someone else .He is not violent but acts stupidly and could endanger someone else .What i need to know if someone here has experience of dealing with this and can actually recommend a Rehab centre through personal experience or some other means.
From the limited experience I've had you've no chance of helping them until they admit they have a problem & are willing to accept help.

bull996

1,442 posts

210 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
st_files said:
From the limited experience I've had you've no chance of helping them until they admit they have a problem & are willing to accept help.
^^^^^ What he said.

Most places wont help until the person admits they need help and want to stop.

AA have a family help group for those affected by drinkers.

Lefty Guns

16,177 posts

203 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Sorry but:

BoRED S2upid said:
Whats the reason hes an alcoholic? Doctor can prescribe drugs that make him sick when the Alcohol hits your stomach but its very often mental, they have to want to stop drinking.
Why would a doc prescribe drug to punish the OP's poor relative when the OP has a beer or two?

Just seems a bit spiteful if you ask me.

getmecoat

richardxjr

7,561 posts

211 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
A dire situation.

Been through it twice with 2 BiL's. One recovered, the other hasn't despite seeking help and going through detox then rehab many many times.

My recommendation is to cut all ties, leave him to reach rock bottom then hopefully climb out of it himself.

Otherwise you are opening yourself up to years of lies, manipulation, empty suicide threats and countless other st.

Good luck.



ShadownINja

76,470 posts

283 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Lefty Guns said:
Sorry but:

BoRED S2upid said:
Whats the reason hes an alcoholic? Doctor can prescribe drugs that make him sick when the Alcohol hits your stomach but its very often mental, they have to want to stop drinking.
Why would a doc prescribe drug to punish the OP's poor relative when the OP has a beer or two?

Just seems a bit spiteful if you ask me.

getmecoat
hehe

Awesome. A drug you can take that gives others a hangover when you drink.

Maxf

8,409 posts

242 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Sorry to hear this. I'm going through similar at the moment and it is incredibly painful for all involved.

Whatever we try fails as the person doesnt want to stop and thinks they can control it. Sadly this means we have largely withdrawn from any relationship with them in order to selfishly protect ourselves (the GF mainly) from the immediate effects. This has it's own problems though.

ShadownINja

76,470 posts

283 months

Tuesday 22nd September 2009
quotequote all
Maxf said:
Sorry to hear this. I'm going through similar at the moment and it is incredibly painful for all involved.

Whatever we try fails as the person doesnt want to stop and thinks they can control it. Sadly this means we have largely withdrawn from any relationship with them in order to selfishly protect ourselves (the GF mainly) from the immediate effects. This has it's own problems though.
Until they accept they have a problem, you will find it hard to get it resolved.

Scraggles

7,619 posts

225 months

Wednesday 23rd September 2009
quotequote all
knew a guy who drank a 750ml bottle of whisky every day, went to sleep and drove to work the next day, rinse and repeat for 3-4 years

implants fitted and now he can't stand the smell of whisky, actually vomits at the smell of it smile

implants removed, drinks occaisonally

sooner or later the OP's friend will kill someone, maybe himself, maybe the op or his family...

insanojackson

5,751 posts

245 months

Wednesday 23rd September 2009
quotequote all
you need to get him into the cycle of change, at the moment it sounds like he is in "pre contemplation" that means he doesnt even think he has a problem and sees no reason to change. To make any change at all he has to be in the "contemplation" stage where he knows he has a problem and realises he needs to do something about it.

when he is ready you need to make him see the negative impact the alcohol is having on his life, as there will be negatives aside from its health impact, then he has to find something to fill the void that will be left when he packs in the drink, a new hobbie or interest.

ShadownINja

76,470 posts

283 months

Wednesday 23rd September 2009
quotequote all
Scraggles said:
knew a guy who drank a 750ml bottle of whisky every day, went to sleep and drove to work the next day, rinse and repeat for 3-4 years

implants fitted and now he can't stand the smell of whisky, actually vomits at the smell of it smile

implants removed, drinks occaisonally

sooner or later the OP's friend will kill someone, maybe himself, maybe the op or his family...
That's clever stuff! Out of interest, does he have any other addictions?

Scraggles

7,619 posts

225 months

Wednesday 23rd September 2009
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only for gay sex, suggest me and him share a bed, suggested that there was no way and told him at 21 stone he was way too heavy, recently he let me know that he is a lot lighter than me, but still not interested

saw him at his parents house and saw the empties... think he smokes like every fag is his last one and that there is a rush so smoke another smile

ShadownINja

76,470 posts

283 months

Thursday 24th September 2009
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Ah. Maybe you could suggest to him to look for underlying reasons to his problem. That's cleverer than implants...

Scraggles

7,619 posts

225 months

Thursday 24th September 2009
quotequote all
think at the time he was in a dead end job with no fun, having almost no liver function and the surgeon asking him why he is still alive as by all rights he should be dead somewhat sobered him up

as for the OP's m8, why not ask him why he drinks so much ?