Fulltiming in a motorhome - a blog
Discussion
Thanks for the advice guys.
All a bit of a palaver this end. I'm kicking myself for having the van recovered to S&B Commercials. After doing so I remembered the last experience I had with them was when they told me I needed a new turbo fitting to the 416CDi Hymer I had. In the end, the issue was solved by my local Indy who re-routed a wire to the turbo for 90quid. S&B have yet again not covered themselves in glory. It went into the Workshop on Thursday (48hrs after they received it) and I was given a garbled message (only upon me chasing it for the umpteenth time) about something to do with the hydraulic control unit needing replacing (at 2k part only, plus VAT), leaf spring at 400quid and then 17hrs of labour needing doing. So, working that back, looking at minimum of 5k with VAT.
I questioned whether the diagnostics showing low voltage didn't actually point to an alternator issue rather than the most expensive black box they could find to replace, but no comment was made on that.
So after all of that, I've ended up getting in touch with Manchett's who were the firm who recovered the van to S&B. I've spoken with them and they have a Ex-Mercedes Mechanic working for them and the Star diagnostic machine, so happy to look at it and also agreed that low voltage can do funny things. It's going to cost me 316quid to get it recovered to them (AA have now washed their hands of it), but happy to pay that given the lads appear to know what they're talking about and seem genuinely keen on getting me back on the road rather than operating on my wallet.
Watch this space......
In other news - my 530d was recovered to Sytner BMW on the same day as the van. What should've been a straight forward replacement of the rear suspension airbags and compressor has turned into a palaver too. I got a call today to notify my that the airbags are on back order from BMW UK and won't be in stock until end-June! So they're now rushing around trying to get me into a courtesy car. Thankfully the BMW is under warranty, but everything seems like such a faff at the moment!
All a bit of a palaver this end. I'm kicking myself for having the van recovered to S&B Commercials. After doing so I remembered the last experience I had with them was when they told me I needed a new turbo fitting to the 416CDi Hymer I had. In the end, the issue was solved by my local Indy who re-routed a wire to the turbo for 90quid. S&B have yet again not covered themselves in glory. It went into the Workshop on Thursday (48hrs after they received it) and I was given a garbled message (only upon me chasing it for the umpteenth time) about something to do with the hydraulic control unit needing replacing (at 2k part only, plus VAT), leaf spring at 400quid and then 17hrs of labour needing doing. So, working that back, looking at minimum of 5k with VAT.
I questioned whether the diagnostics showing low voltage didn't actually point to an alternator issue rather than the most expensive black box they could find to replace, but no comment was made on that.
So after all of that, I've ended up getting in touch with Manchett's who were the firm who recovered the van to S&B. I've spoken with them and they have a Ex-Mercedes Mechanic working for them and the Star diagnostic machine, so happy to look at it and also agreed that low voltage can do funny things. It's going to cost me 316quid to get it recovered to them (AA have now washed their hands of it), but happy to pay that given the lads appear to know what they're talking about and seem genuinely keen on getting me back on the road rather than operating on my wallet.
Watch this space......
In other news - my 530d was recovered to Sytner BMW on the same day as the van. What should've been a straight forward replacement of the rear suspension airbags and compressor has turned into a palaver too. I got a call today to notify my that the airbags are on back order from BMW UK and won't be in stock until end-June! So they're now rushing around trying to get me into a courtesy car. Thankfully the BMW is under warranty, but everything seems like such a faff at the moment!
custardkid said:
For peace of mind the RAC Arrival / camping and caravan club breakdown policy is used to dealing with over sized motorhomes
Absolutely - I saw this and also the Caravan Club breakdown policy too. I will look at separating out the insurance from the breakdown cover when I renew since I think Safeguard are pretty expensive all in.So an update on the Mercedes palaver.....
I was forced to take to Twitter last night. Not my usual style as I'm not a social media monkey, but given I had called six times to get the Information I needed from the Workshop and not received a bean, I felt tweeting S&B Commercials and their Managing Director was the only way to get taken notice of. It worked, at 09:30 today I we tweeted back and at 09:54 I had received exactly what I had requested first on Friday.
The total quote came to 4.3k!!!!! But just to release the vehicle to me, they were quoting 816quid of diagnostic charges!!!
Needless to say, I was not happy and sent an email to Customer Services detailing all the issues I'd had with their staff at the Workshop, my concerns they were just pulling out the most expensive part they could justify to replace and also my astonishment at having run up 800quid of unauthorised diagnostics charges.
The upshot was a fairly swift call from the Group Compliance & Quality Assurance Manager who assured me this is not their usual way of doing Business. He's parachuting in his Head Mechanic to the branch tomorrow who will redo all the diagnostics (at their cost) and fully investigate what has been done with the vehicle and question thoroughly what the right diagnosis should be. They will also relook at the charges to do and see about reducing them. Also conceded that Bosch being the OE supplier of the unit, if it is judged to be at fault, then we could look to use the Bosch branded unit (at 925quid instead of 2.3k for the Merc stamped part).
I finally feel like headway, a reasonable quote and a solution is in sight. But boy what an effort and not the kind of effort I should be putting in when I place my vehicle in the hands of a Mercedes Main Dealer. By tomorrow I will know the outcome and wouldn't be at all surprised if a new battery and alternator is the suggested way forward, but only time will tell!
Will keep you posted.
Ok, more update time, but this time somewhat more positive. Painful still, but positive nonetheless.......
Head Honcho chappie called me yesterday to report on the diagnostics re-conducted. He was kind enough to send me the Diagnostics Pathway Report and talked me through everything line by line. It seems that the ABS Controller is indeed at fault but he conceded the diagnostics time first quoted was excessive and will only bill me for 2.5hrs. He told me I was free to source the Bosch OE part and they would fit it, but sadly after lots of googling around, none are available and after some enquiries, no-one can tell me with any confidence when they'll be back in stock. So I've given S&B the go ahead to fit the Mercedes part. I did find a few reconditioned ones on eBay but I'd rather just fit new and forget about that part now for the next 13yrs!
The big bonus here though is the pragmatic approach the chap has taken to re-installing confidence in their operation. As a goodwill gesture he has discounted parts by 15% and labour by 20% and also agreed that given the wheels, calipers and brake pads are coming off in order to fit the new slider pins, he will have the mechanic fit the discs & pads which I sourced ages ago but couldn't afford to have fitted. There will only be an additional half hour labour added to put the discs on.
So all in all, I'm happy. Well, as happy as one can be when facing a 3.2k bill (or thereabouts). But it's still a grand saving over what was presented to me initially and although I'm sad that I had to invest this much time getting a satisfactory resolution, it has been worth it. I have no plans to move Carrie on whatsoever, so "investing" in keeping her in tip-top condition is self-serving. And it certainly won't hurt having an invoice in her history file from Mercedes main dealer if the time ever did come to sell her.
Hopefully the only thing left to do this year will be to have the oil changed, which I'll do at All Klasse Autos given they're my "go to" Indy for Merc. Sadly it's the only job he can do without jacking it up, but given how he's helped me over the years, I want to keep putting work his way where I can.
Van will either be ready Saturday or Monday. Watch this space!
Head Honcho chappie called me yesterday to report on the diagnostics re-conducted. He was kind enough to send me the Diagnostics Pathway Report and talked me through everything line by line. It seems that the ABS Controller is indeed at fault but he conceded the diagnostics time first quoted was excessive and will only bill me for 2.5hrs. He told me I was free to source the Bosch OE part and they would fit it, but sadly after lots of googling around, none are available and after some enquiries, no-one can tell me with any confidence when they'll be back in stock. So I've given S&B the go ahead to fit the Mercedes part. I did find a few reconditioned ones on eBay but I'd rather just fit new and forget about that part now for the next 13yrs!
The big bonus here though is the pragmatic approach the chap has taken to re-installing confidence in their operation. As a goodwill gesture he has discounted parts by 15% and labour by 20% and also agreed that given the wheels, calipers and brake pads are coming off in order to fit the new slider pins, he will have the mechanic fit the discs & pads which I sourced ages ago but couldn't afford to have fitted. There will only be an additional half hour labour added to put the discs on.
So all in all, I'm happy. Well, as happy as one can be when facing a 3.2k bill (or thereabouts). But it's still a grand saving over what was presented to me initially and although I'm sad that I had to invest this much time getting a satisfactory resolution, it has been worth it. I have no plans to move Carrie on whatsoever, so "investing" in keeping her in tip-top condition is self-serving. And it certainly won't hurt having an invoice in her history file from Mercedes main dealer if the time ever did come to sell her.
Hopefully the only thing left to do this year will be to have the oil changed, which I'll do at All Klasse Autos given they're my "go to" Indy for Merc. Sadly it's the only job he can do without jacking it up, but given how he's helped me over the years, I want to keep putting work his way where I can.
Van will either be ready Saturday or Monday. Watch this space!
Ok - another day and another item added to the to do list.......!!! And approval just sought from S&B Commercials for parts....
Currently the work comprises the following:
- New ABS hydraulic control module;
- Replace discs & pads (rear);
- Replace rear hub seals;
- Replace handbrake caliper piston, seized on the NSR;
- Replace caliper slider pins on the rear;
- Replace OSR leaf spring;
- New brake fluid & bleed system;
- Front wheel alignment
That's enough to be getting on with. With discounted labour & parts, it's still coming in at >4k!!!!!!!!
Will be collecting Carrie on Friday and will hoping to god that she feels like a new van after all this. My plans for leather steering wheel and new satnav are now shelved for the foreseeable! And although it will take thousands of miles to recoup the amount spent on solving the binding brake issue, I'm hoping very much that with that issue solved and wheel alignment done, I will now finally see the >20mpg promised to me by many a Concorde owner of similar vintage. I saw 23mpg as an average on the Hymer and whilst Carrie is heavier, she should see around the same as I don't drive it as fast and once you're up and moving, the difference is negligible (he says!).
Currently the work comprises the following:
- New ABS hydraulic control module;
- Replace discs & pads (rear);
- Replace rear hub seals;
- Replace handbrake caliper piston, seized on the NSR;
- Replace caliper slider pins on the rear;
- Replace OSR leaf spring;
- New brake fluid & bleed system;
- Front wheel alignment
That's enough to be getting on with. With discounted labour & parts, it's still coming in at >4k!!!!!!!!
Will be collecting Carrie on Friday and will hoping to god that she feels like a new van after all this. My plans for leather steering wheel and new satnav are now shelved for the foreseeable! And although it will take thousands of miles to recoup the amount spent on solving the binding brake issue, I'm hoping very much that with that issue solved and wheel alignment done, I will now finally see the >20mpg promised to me by many a Concorde owner of similar vintage. I saw 23mpg as an average on the Hymer and whilst Carrie is heavier, she should see around the same as I don't drive it as fast and once you're up and moving, the difference is negligible (he says!).
As a change from the mechanicals of the motorhome, I thought I'd update with the mechanicals and machinations of my brain since a few members have been kind enough to ask me "offline" how things are going.... I really do appreciate the PMs and best wishes.
I know it’s the same for all of us with time flying past, but I honestly do not know where the last six months have gone. I have so many competing priorities what with my daughter, the divorce, house sale, managing the relationship with my ex and making sure the relationship with my girlfriend is the best for both of us (oh and work!! Almost forgot about that!!). Add to that commuting between Frankfurt and Cambridge and living in the van back in the UK………..I’m exhausted just typing it and can’t actually understand how I’ve managed to get this far.
If I’m honest, it’s now beginning to take its toll a bit. I’m fine, but I’m not, all at the same time. I’m exceptionally tired and I can be moved to tears at the slightest thing. But I can see an end in sight, at least as far as the house and divorce is concerned and then another year down the line the commuting problem will be solved one way or another……or we’ll have found our new level somewhere else. We’ll see what that holds, but the main thing is to focus on getting rid of the old which is the divorce and house. That’s the priority and I’m hoping by August, it’ll all be done and dusted.
With hindsight everything is as clear as day. Having lots of time (on planes, mainly but also periods alone in the motorhome), looking back I knew my wife was the wrong one for me from the outset but I didn’t want to recognize it (or didn’t have the strength / courage to do so). I now know categorically that I should never have got married and I have spent the last 12 years being miserable. It’s amazing how many of my friends now tell me that they knew my wife wasn’t right for me but they didn’t know how to tell me or convince me. But none of them were surprised when it came to an end and were actually quite relieved. I certainly am and I now have a chance to live the life I want to – it’s come at a considerable cost both financially and also emotionally. I’m doing my best to protect my daughter from the emotional element as much as possible, but no doubt she will have issues in future no matter how much she’s been insulated from arguments. Separation is a game-changer for all involved and I was surprised to learn how much of a toll it has taken on my parents too and how much they have felt it even though they know I’m in a better place without my ex now and are fully supportive of the wonderful relationship I’m in now.
I can categorically say that my wife ending our marriage was the best thing to happen to me (aside from my daughter being born) and the result of which has been the opportunity to meet the love of my life. Has it been easy, painless, and relaxing? Absolutely not. I’m broke, stressed and exhausted. But I’m also so incredibly and undeniably happy. Over the longer term I can see much more potential for happiness and fulfillment than would ever have been possible in my previous relationship. I’m hoping by virtue of this, the damage to my daughter will be limited since she will really see how happiness breeds happiness and she’ll have the opportunity to grow up in a very loving and supportive environment and whilst not her “natural” family unit, it will be a fabulous family unit. Was it worth it? Yes. But I’d say to anyone, if they’re contemplating a change to an existing setup, you have to be 110% convinced it’s exactly what you want and have to go in with eyes wide open to the catastrophe that it creates for everyone around you. My ex, I’m sure, had no idea of the Pandora’s box she opened up and I’m not truly convinced that she’s any happier now than she was beforehand. All of her attempts to demonstrate her happiness are just that - attempts, or entirely superficial. At the end of the day, I think she was the one with the problem and it wasn’t me. But then I would say that, wouldn’t I? What I do know is that she created so many issues for me that I’m having to work through each one of them with a Counsellor to try and clean up all the little Trojan Horse hacks she left in my brain to fester and undermine me.
I think I’m lucky. I sometimes don’t think I’m a very strong person. But I think I must be because I’ve heard of so many other people who have found themselves in similar situations and have either drunk themselves in a stupor or just completely given up. I remember the day it was obvious that there was no reconciliation, I thought to myself “Right Dunk – this is an opportunity. It’s an opportunity to be happy and make the most of your life”. I’ve tried to hold that in focus and I truly believe it. I don’t believe in god or in any higher being, just that you have the power yourself to achieve what you want or what you believe you deserve. I chose happiness and thankfully, I also found my girlfriend, and she fulfills all of that and more.
The next 12 months of living between Frankfurt and the UK will still be challenging, even if the house and divorce are through in the next two months. But the difference is, it will be challenging because for every night we spend apart, it will be down to a longing to be together. Looking back, I rarely spent the kind of time in the UK with my ex that I now spend in Frankfurt with my girlfriend. It just goes to show that if you want to be with someone, you’ll do anything to achieve it. I’ve never been more convinced of anything than I am of the relationship I’m in now and I will do anything to make sure that both of us are as happy we we deserve to be.
I know it’s the same for all of us with time flying past, but I honestly do not know where the last six months have gone. I have so many competing priorities what with my daughter, the divorce, house sale, managing the relationship with my ex and making sure the relationship with my girlfriend is the best for both of us (oh and work!! Almost forgot about that!!). Add to that commuting between Frankfurt and Cambridge and living in the van back in the UK………..I’m exhausted just typing it and can’t actually understand how I’ve managed to get this far.
If I’m honest, it’s now beginning to take its toll a bit. I’m fine, but I’m not, all at the same time. I’m exceptionally tired and I can be moved to tears at the slightest thing. But I can see an end in sight, at least as far as the house and divorce is concerned and then another year down the line the commuting problem will be solved one way or another……or we’ll have found our new level somewhere else. We’ll see what that holds, but the main thing is to focus on getting rid of the old which is the divorce and house. That’s the priority and I’m hoping by August, it’ll all be done and dusted.
With hindsight everything is as clear as day. Having lots of time (on planes, mainly but also periods alone in the motorhome), looking back I knew my wife was the wrong one for me from the outset but I didn’t want to recognize it (or didn’t have the strength / courage to do so). I now know categorically that I should never have got married and I have spent the last 12 years being miserable. It’s amazing how many of my friends now tell me that they knew my wife wasn’t right for me but they didn’t know how to tell me or convince me. But none of them were surprised when it came to an end and were actually quite relieved. I certainly am and I now have a chance to live the life I want to – it’s come at a considerable cost both financially and also emotionally. I’m doing my best to protect my daughter from the emotional element as much as possible, but no doubt she will have issues in future no matter how much she’s been insulated from arguments. Separation is a game-changer for all involved and I was surprised to learn how much of a toll it has taken on my parents too and how much they have felt it even though they know I’m in a better place without my ex now and are fully supportive of the wonderful relationship I’m in now.
I can categorically say that my wife ending our marriage was the best thing to happen to me (aside from my daughter being born) and the result of which has been the opportunity to meet the love of my life. Has it been easy, painless, and relaxing? Absolutely not. I’m broke, stressed and exhausted. But I’m also so incredibly and undeniably happy. Over the longer term I can see much more potential for happiness and fulfillment than would ever have been possible in my previous relationship. I’m hoping by virtue of this, the damage to my daughter will be limited since she will really see how happiness breeds happiness and she’ll have the opportunity to grow up in a very loving and supportive environment and whilst not her “natural” family unit, it will be a fabulous family unit. Was it worth it? Yes. But I’d say to anyone, if they’re contemplating a change to an existing setup, you have to be 110% convinced it’s exactly what you want and have to go in with eyes wide open to the catastrophe that it creates for everyone around you. My ex, I’m sure, had no idea of the Pandora’s box she opened up and I’m not truly convinced that she’s any happier now than she was beforehand. All of her attempts to demonstrate her happiness are just that - attempts, or entirely superficial. At the end of the day, I think she was the one with the problem and it wasn’t me. But then I would say that, wouldn’t I? What I do know is that she created so many issues for me that I’m having to work through each one of them with a Counsellor to try and clean up all the little Trojan Horse hacks she left in my brain to fester and undermine me.
I think I’m lucky. I sometimes don’t think I’m a very strong person. But I think I must be because I’ve heard of so many other people who have found themselves in similar situations and have either drunk themselves in a stupor or just completely given up. I remember the day it was obvious that there was no reconciliation, I thought to myself “Right Dunk – this is an opportunity. It’s an opportunity to be happy and make the most of your life”. I’ve tried to hold that in focus and I truly believe it. I don’t believe in god or in any higher being, just that you have the power yourself to achieve what you want or what you believe you deserve. I chose happiness and thankfully, I also found my girlfriend, and she fulfills all of that and more.
The next 12 months of living between Frankfurt and the UK will still be challenging, even if the house and divorce are through in the next two months. But the difference is, it will be challenging because for every night we spend apart, it will be down to a longing to be together. Looking back, I rarely spent the kind of time in the UK with my ex that I now spend in Frankfurt with my girlfriend. It just goes to show that if you want to be with someone, you’ll do anything to achieve it. I’ve never been more convinced of anything than I am of the relationship I’m in now and I will do anything to make sure that both of us are as happy we we deserve to be.
Thanks Oblio, feef, MB140 - I can definitely relate to what you've written too. I'd say I'm less bittersweet though about the divorce. I'm so happy with my current stuation and so well awre that although I was desperately unhappy in my marriage, I'd never have cheated even if I'd known how happy I could be, so I needed it to end to achieve the happiness I've got now. I'm gutted about the mney aspect, but I'm now so much of a believer in Money not bringing happiness, that I can reconcile that.
By way of update on the vehicle, I picked up Carrie last Friday from the Mercedes dealer. It seems they picked up not only quite a lot of the diagnostic cost which I disputed but also the cost of the new ABS sensor which was the last minute addition to the expense on Thursday. I presume somebody missed it in the original scoping of work. I ended up paying just under 4.3k for the work undertaken.
Anyway, I hoped that she would feel really different when I picked her up (given the costs involved!) and I wasn’t disappointed. From the off she felt much sprightlier. I really can now see how much a drag (literally) the binding rear brake was on the van. The autobox creep which one normally gets in a vehicle was there, but I hadn’t realized how much it had been compromised……….Carrie now really doesn’t just “creep” but almost surges when in Drive (well, that’s perhaps a little overdone, but she certainly moves effortless forward without any gas) and the pickup when accelerating feels like she’s been chipped +15-20bhp.
Once moving, the benefits of the wheel alignment are clear – she tracks the road beautifully and needs just a small finger on the wheel to keep her towing a straight line on the motorway. I think the broken spring had added a wandering also – this is now gone and I feel like I could drive effortlessly for hours in her. The brakes feel strong (probably as much the new brake fluid as the new friction material) and overall just feels “sorted”.
Obviously it should do for the money, but I’m so pleased that I can tell the difference and I am going to make sure that this wasn’t all for nothing and she gets driven properly and regularly now so that there are no more seizures of these components. I popped my head under the van when I returned and it was lovely to see all the nice new shiny components under there!
Hopefully the fuel consumption will improve as a result – I have no doubt given how much stronger the engine feels now; unencumbered by the binding brakes.
All in all, I'm very happy. Clearly I would never choose to have such an expensive repair bill, but at least I can feel the benefits and now feel like the van I'm driving cost 200k new!!
Next stop, the cheeky addition of a leather trimmed steering wheel just to complete the feel!
By way of update on the vehicle, I picked up Carrie last Friday from the Mercedes dealer. It seems they picked up not only quite a lot of the diagnostic cost which I disputed but also the cost of the new ABS sensor which was the last minute addition to the expense on Thursday. I presume somebody missed it in the original scoping of work. I ended up paying just under 4.3k for the work undertaken.
Anyway, I hoped that she would feel really different when I picked her up (given the costs involved!) and I wasn’t disappointed. From the off she felt much sprightlier. I really can now see how much a drag (literally) the binding rear brake was on the van. The autobox creep which one normally gets in a vehicle was there, but I hadn’t realized how much it had been compromised……….Carrie now really doesn’t just “creep” but almost surges when in Drive (well, that’s perhaps a little overdone, but she certainly moves effortless forward without any gas) and the pickup when accelerating feels like she’s been chipped +15-20bhp.
Once moving, the benefits of the wheel alignment are clear – she tracks the road beautifully and needs just a small finger on the wheel to keep her towing a straight line on the motorway. I think the broken spring had added a wandering also – this is now gone and I feel like I could drive effortlessly for hours in her. The brakes feel strong (probably as much the new brake fluid as the new friction material) and overall just feels “sorted”.
Obviously it should do for the money, but I’m so pleased that I can tell the difference and I am going to make sure that this wasn’t all for nothing and she gets driven properly and regularly now so that there are no more seizures of these components. I popped my head under the van when I returned and it was lovely to see all the nice new shiny components under there!
Hopefully the fuel consumption will improve as a result – I have no doubt given how much stronger the engine feels now; unencumbered by the binding brakes.
All in all, I'm very happy. Clearly I would never choose to have such an expensive repair bill, but at least I can feel the benefits and now feel like the van I'm driving cost 200k new!!
Next stop, the cheeky addition of a leather trimmed steering wheel just to complete the feel!
Edited by Spuffington on Monday 18th June 16:00
Thanks for the nudge, chaps.
I can scarcely believe it's been 2.5 months since I last posted. Not only am I still stinging from the motorhome bill, but so much has happened, it's untrue.
In short:
- first holiday together with little'n and my girlfriend. A roaring success. They both adore each other and a solid foundation for the future has been laid.
- contracts have been exchanged on the family home and the sale completes on Friday (7th Sept).
- I have just been issued with Heads of Terms for a move to Frankfurt. Looks like I'll be transferred onto a German Contract by the end of the year and have Frankfurt as my home with the UK as a stopover when visiting my daughter every 10days.
I'm not a massive social media user, but a quick look at Facebook memories informs me that this time last year I had just spent my first "overnight"
in Frankfurt with my girlfriend just a fortnight ago. It is hard to believe what we have achieved in 12 months and how different my life looks to the same period 24 months ago when everything was falling apart around me.
I'm currently desperately skint. The mere thought of the release of hundreds of thousands of pounds from the house sale being diverted from me and solely in the direction of my ex gauls me beyond belief. That and the >£100k she'll get in maintenance over the next 13yrs. But I try not to dwell on it. With all said and done, I've learnt one big lesson through all of this - happiness does not depend on the size of your house, the amount of money you have in the bank, the car on your drive and outward expressions of wealth. That's not to say that I'm done with nice things or earning good money, but it does mean that my focus is elsewhere.
I have a wonderful daughter who I love to bits and with whom I have managed to maintain a very strong and close relationship. I have a girlfriend, the likes of whom I could never have dreamt about - a combination of beauty, intelligence, kindness, warmth and love. She’s adventurer who pushes my boundaries and makes me be the best version of me, but also a homely, loving woman who appreciates family and precious moments together. With these two women in my life, anything is achievable and I am excited at what the future holds.
In spite of all of this, I still have moments of intense sadness. There are moments where the collateral damage is so huge and the drastic change to my finances and living circumstances seem too much to deal with. But all it takes is some practical logic, emotional support from my girlfriend and some tears from me and I'm able to push ahead and keep things (as ever) on an even keel.
On the one hand I'm very excited to be trying life as a German taxpayer(!) at the ripe old age of 39 - not just pretending to work in a different country. But actually having it as my base. On the other hand, the continual commute backwards and forwards to the UK, with no practical end in sight is tiring.
I've not been able to secure a campsite beyond November for Carrie, so I have resigned myself to using my parents house as a base for the four-six days a month I will be in the UK. This will also be difficult as regards HMRC as I will be going non-dom and will have to day-count to remain under the 90day rule. The upside to all this is potentially a tax rebate which might help me in the short term. I will be taking the motorhome to Germany to use during the winter months when it’s too cold for VW camper van. We’re both really excited at the opportunity this brings and German campsites are far more relaxed in terms of "full-timing". We won't be doing so as we have a rather lovely flat in Frankfurt, but we will be renting a 200sqm pitch about 25mins drive from the City centre for 12months for EUR 1.6k which will allow us to store Carrie and then use her as and when
we have time. Much cheaper than campsites in the UK.
As if that isn’t enough, the divorce is going through (held up by some bad legal advice on my side) but I would hope for Decree Nici in the next month and Absolute well before Christmas.
That will be the final line drawn under a chapter of my life that, aside from my daughter, I’d rather forget about.
Bit of a ramble - sorry. My thoughts are such a jumble - the main thing is that the overriding emotion is happiness. Aside from the emotions relating to my daughter, I can't remember having ever been this happy, which is so strange when there are so many competing reasons to be down. But these will lessen over time and at the moment I'm just revelling in my fantastic new life.
No-one can ever accuse it of being boring!
I can scarcely believe it's been 2.5 months since I last posted. Not only am I still stinging from the motorhome bill, but so much has happened, it's untrue.
In short:
- first holiday together with little'n and my girlfriend. A roaring success. They both adore each other and a solid foundation for the future has been laid.
- contracts have been exchanged on the family home and the sale completes on Friday (7th Sept).
- I have just been issued with Heads of Terms for a move to Frankfurt. Looks like I'll be transferred onto a German Contract by the end of the year and have Frankfurt as my home with the UK as a stopover when visiting my daughter every 10days.
I'm not a massive social media user, but a quick look at Facebook memories informs me that this time last year I had just spent my first "overnight"
in Frankfurt with my girlfriend just a fortnight ago. It is hard to believe what we have achieved in 12 months and how different my life looks to the same period 24 months ago when everything was falling apart around me.I'm currently desperately skint. The mere thought of the release of hundreds of thousands of pounds from the house sale being diverted from me and solely in the direction of my ex gauls me beyond belief. That and the >£100k she'll get in maintenance over the next 13yrs. But I try not to dwell on it. With all said and done, I've learnt one big lesson through all of this - happiness does not depend on the size of your house, the amount of money you have in the bank, the car on your drive and outward expressions of wealth. That's not to say that I'm done with nice things or earning good money, but it does mean that my focus is elsewhere.
I have a wonderful daughter who I love to bits and with whom I have managed to maintain a very strong and close relationship. I have a girlfriend, the likes of whom I could never have dreamt about - a combination of beauty, intelligence, kindness, warmth and love. She’s adventurer who pushes my boundaries and makes me be the best version of me, but also a homely, loving woman who appreciates family and precious moments together. With these two women in my life, anything is achievable and I am excited at what the future holds.
In spite of all of this, I still have moments of intense sadness. There are moments where the collateral damage is so huge and the drastic change to my finances and living circumstances seem too much to deal with. But all it takes is some practical logic, emotional support from my girlfriend and some tears from me and I'm able to push ahead and keep things (as ever) on an even keel.
On the one hand I'm very excited to be trying life as a German taxpayer(!) at the ripe old age of 39 - not just pretending to work in a different country. But actually having it as my base. On the other hand, the continual commute backwards and forwards to the UK, with no practical end in sight is tiring.
I've not been able to secure a campsite beyond November for Carrie, so I have resigned myself to using my parents house as a base for the four-six days a month I will be in the UK. This will also be difficult as regards HMRC as I will be going non-dom and will have to day-count to remain under the 90day rule. The upside to all this is potentially a tax rebate which might help me in the short term. I will be taking the motorhome to Germany to use during the winter months when it’s too cold for VW camper van. We’re both really excited at the opportunity this brings and German campsites are far more relaxed in terms of "full-timing". We won't be doing so as we have a rather lovely flat in Frankfurt, but we will be renting a 200sqm pitch about 25mins drive from the City centre for 12months for EUR 1.6k which will allow us to store Carrie and then use her as and when
we have time. Much cheaper than campsites in the UK.
As if that isn’t enough, the divorce is going through (held up by some bad legal advice on my side) but I would hope for Decree Nici in the next month and Absolute well before Christmas.
That will be the final line drawn under a chapter of my life that, aside from my daughter, I’d rather forget about.
Bit of a ramble - sorry. My thoughts are such a jumble - the main thing is that the overriding emotion is happiness. Aside from the emotions relating to my daughter, I can't remember having ever been this happy, which is so strange when there are so many competing reasons to be down. But these will lessen over time and at the moment I'm just revelling in my fantastic new life.
No-one can ever accuse it of being boring!
@Thurbs - ich habe Deutsch erst mal in der Schule gelernt dann Deutsch an der Uni studiert und seit den letzten c. 8 Jahren mehr oder weniger bei Firmen in Frankfurt gearbeitet.
Thanks for the best wishes everyone. The next time I write an update, it’ll be effectively to conclude my “Fulltiming” exercise. The rental contract for the campsite in Frankfurt is now signed (for 12 months) and I collect the keyfob for the entrance barrier on Sunday, the Dover-Calais ferry is booked for 4th October and we’ll be arriving on 7th October at the campsite where Carrie will be stored and used as often as possible as our holiday home for the foreseeable future. This effectively brings to an end a whacky, exciting, tough, costly and emotional adventure. I’ll try and summarise it all properly in one last blog once it’s all over. I have to confess that I’m looking forward to having the motorhome once again as a holiday vehicle and not something I need to worry about as being my primary residence and all the logistics which go with that in England. But I’ll also be a little sad given Carrie (and Harry before) has looked after me and provided me with a safe and comfortable place to lay my head when I have seen first-hand the lengths that other people in similar situations who have not been so lucky as me, have had to resort to (sleeping in their cars, for example).
Anyway – thank you again for your support and reading what now turned into a relatively epic thread! Appreciate all the kind comments and PMs I’ve received with offers of help and support.
Thanks for the best wishes everyone. The next time I write an update, it’ll be effectively to conclude my “Fulltiming” exercise. The rental contract for the campsite in Frankfurt is now signed (for 12 months) and I collect the keyfob for the entrance barrier on Sunday, the Dover-Calais ferry is booked for 4th October and we’ll be arriving on 7th October at the campsite where Carrie will be stored and used as often as possible as our holiday home for the foreseeable future. This effectively brings to an end a whacky, exciting, tough, costly and emotional adventure. I’ll try and summarise it all properly in one last blog once it’s all over. I have to confess that I’m looking forward to having the motorhome once again as a holiday vehicle and not something I need to worry about as being my primary residence and all the logistics which go with that in England. But I’ll also be a little sad given Carrie (and Harry before) has looked after me and provided me with a safe and comfortable place to lay my head when I have seen first-hand the lengths that other people in similar situations who have not been so lucky as me, have had to resort to (sleeping in their cars, for example).
Anyway – thank you again for your support and reading what now turned into a relatively epic thread! Appreciate all the kind comments and PMs I’ve received with offers of help and support.
So – that’s it, 18months after I started the thread, I’m bringing it to a close. Last weekend marked the end of my fulltiming in my motorhome and its transition from “home” to “holiday home”. The original intention was to save money, but looking at the costs I’ve incurred over that period, I could easily have rented a small flat in Saffron Walden. But although with hindsight that was possible, technically might’ve been difficult what with having been mortgaged at the same time and some of the motorhome expenditure a little more discretionary and therefore more able to be shifted around for when it was affordable.
Nevertheless, the Hymer was my home for 7months and the Concorde for the remainder. Both of which served me well but the Concorde most definitely made the difference between being able to live and just surviving. Both of them however provided me with safe and comfortable space which I could also use to enjoy elsewhere and make some memories both with my daughter and alone. The Concorde also was instrumental in allowing myself and my new partner to enjoy time together and our first trip up to NW Scotland this time last year is so special in our memories that I will forever be grateful for the time we had and how the motorhome facilitated that experience.
Therefore, it was only fitting that Carrie’s transition from home to holiday home took place together with my partner last weekend. As I’ve mentioned previously, campsites in the UK are not very accommodating of full-timers and are also very seasonal. The biggest issue with fulltiming I’ve not found in living in close quarters, but the continual logistics of having to move every 28days to satisfy planning & licensing regulations of campsites. It has got to the point where I almost have to plan all of my trips to the UK around campsites rather than maximizing my time with my daughter. As a result, the closure of Cambridge C&CC Site for the winter forced my hand in terms of finally making the decision to move the van…………to Germany.
In Germany, the concept of Dauer Camping (longterm camping) is accepted and you are able to enter into contracts for occupying pitches for longer periods from 3, 6 and 12months. Although we have the VW camper in Frankfurt, its usage will be limited during the winter just purely down to insulation etc. so it makes sense to bring Carrie over to Frankfurt so that we can make use of her on weekends away, or longer trips down to the Alps to indulge our joint love of snowboarding.
So on Thursday evening last week, I left Cambridge site for the last time (after having lived there for c. 7 months this year) and set course for Stansted Airport to pick up my girlfriend. It was strange leaving Cambridge as I have begun to view it as home. The staff there were very friendly and welcoming but at times did stick inflexibly to the rules, which sometimes made me slightly bitter about having spent so much money there. That said, I love South Cambridge and feel very happy there. As a result it will probably be the place where myself and my girlfriend settle when we come back to the UK.
In terms of the trip – it was superb. On the face of it, it was a complete farce in terms of overnights and timing, but as with everything with my “new” relationship, everything has a habit of always working out for the best and so long as we’re still laughing (which is always the case), the world is well! J
Upon arriving at Stansted, I had the joy of parking next to a whole line of National Express coaches! J I’d phoned ahead to Stansted Airport the day before and enquired about parking due to the size of the van – they told me to use the coach station. In the end, it only cost me 14quid and I got my own personalized bus stop! When I met my girlfriend and took her down to the coachpark, she found it hilarious as we had to open the gate to get into the bus stop to the van! As a result of the delayed flight, we turned up late at Canterbury Aire and couldn’t get in, so ploughed on to Dover Seafront where we parked up and slept for the night ahead of an early ferry. The ferry over was great – calm seas and upgraded to Club Lounge so we had a nice breakie and young lady had champagne with hers – great start to the day. And then headed to a little Aire north of Arras given I had to work. The little Aire was delightful – only three spaces and I got the last one. Free hookup (which is great since the fridge is still not working on gas!) and I spent the day on the laptop whilst girlfriend read and researched out next holiday. I always make a point of spending money in towns with Aires, but this was so disappointing – at the end of a long day working, we went for a walk into town to find a nice square for drinks and dinner – but the whole place was run down and felt threatening. We ended up back at the van for a bowl of pasta.
The next day we woke late and had a lazy morning – breakfast outside on the picnic benches in the neighbouring park and then set off for Vimy Ridge Canadian War Memorial & Museum. A real tear-jerker and both of us found it very difficult to cope with the stories portrayed in the museum and learning just how futile the war in the trenches was. The preserved trenches really brought home how they were scrabbling over just 25m of earth at one stage! Anyway, it was so fascinating that we lost track of time and it was 4pm before we got on the road………………the sudden realization we had to be in Frankfurt by 5pm on Sunday and we had just 25hrs to get there meant we set course for Belgium without really a plan.
After looking at CamperContact app we found a lovely little Aire on the German/Belgium border. Turning up at 8pm meant all the spaces were gone! Gggrgrr.. So set off for another just 20mins away. Sadly this turned out to just be a carpark, which was spookily quiet. Other half was not impressed and felt threatened. I tried to calm her but it was obvious she wasn’t happy and our minds were firmly made up as the local chavs in their boyracer cars turned up to do laps of the carpark at 9pm. Soooooo, off we set again. An hour later we ended up at the top of Belgium’s highest mountain (yes, really! They actually have high ground!!) and spent the night in a parking lot with around 8 other vans. In the end, we had a great night sleep and set off the next morning along a mixture of a roads and autobahns to get to Frankfurt and our chosen campsite at 5pm on Sunday.
Upon arriving there, there was a mixture of excitement and sadness from me. So excited at the beginning of a new chapter – a chapter by which the van was going to be used as a holidaying vehicle and an end to my “mobile living”. Also a period where the van is truly mine and my partners and not just my space. But sadness because it’s a place where I have spent many nights with my daughter – a refuge for both of us and a place she truly feels at home in. I felt like I’d kind of betrayed her by bringing it to Germany. But that said, I know I had no other real choice and she will also be coming to Frankfurt to visit us in December, so will get to take her to the van then and we also plan on going snowboarding together in February halfterm, so she will be with us in Carrie then too. One of the conditions of my insurance is that the van is brought back before the MOT expires in May, so in any event, it won’t be in Germany all the time. But for a moment there, I certainly felt sad for my daughter.
Staying on the trip for one minute – we used around 160litres of fuel, equating to an average of 19mpg. Best I saw was on the first tank which did the whole of the UK, France and western Belgium – nearly 22mpg (which is a record in any event in my ownership now the brakes are sorted) and the worst I saw was 16mpg on the second tank which was down to the uphill and downdale nature of Eastern Belgium and the Eiffel Mountains in Germany. But still not so bad. The whole trip cost us around GBP 300 (inc. parking, ferry and diesel). It was a wonderful reminder for both of us at how much we enjoy travelling and spending time together in our little “home on wheels”. Another reminder also that my girlfriend has, over the last 14months together, become my very best friend. Someone with whom I can share the deepest secrets of my soul but also laugh with and lark around like a child – unjudged but ever supported.
In terms of the van – well Carrie is just superb. She will always need money spending on her – both discretionary as well as mandatory. But she’s in great nick and drove brilliantly on the way down. Having had the wheel alignment done made a massive difference to the ease of driving; literally just piloting her with a thumb and finger most of the way on the autobahn and she never missed a beat. I had her serviced before I left and came back with a clean bill of health. I also had a gas certificate produced – all is fine, but still haven’t got to the bottom of why the fridge isn’t working on gas (even when the freezer is). I fear the burner needs replacing, but if that doesn’t work, then I’ll have to bite the bullet and replace the fridge. At 2k (fitted), it’s something I’m trying to avoid, but the trip was a reminder that together with the toilet, the fridge is pretty much one of the most important devices on board. I’ll try and get that sorted in Germany and when she’s back in the UK, I’m going to treat her to a full detail and some new transfers on the rear. And in the meantime, I’ll be mounting my newly retrimmed leather steering wheel to replace the crap plastic one which comes with all Sprinters.
So that’s it folks. Life is good. Not just good – it’s brilliant. Back 18months ago when I started writing this blog I had no idea 1) how many people would be interested in my plight & how much support is out there on PH, 2) how I was going to get through the next few months, let alone years and 3) what the future would look like in any positive way.
Today I’m in a relationship which is 14months old but gets better with every day. None of the magic of the honeymoon period is lost. I’m loved, supported, listened to, championed, challenged and driven to be the best version of me that I can be. I have, for the first time outside of being a Son or a Father, experienced unconditional love and I am bowled over by how it has the ability to make everything life throws at you so much easier and outlook so much more positive. My daughter loves my partner and the feeling is mutual. For the moment I remain commuting to and from Frankfurt and UK but it is no longer a chore, but the new norm. I am 39 and living with my parents in the UK but I feel like I have everything. I have managed to pay off all my accumulated debts in spite of not getting more than 5k from my house sale and last week, with the support & encouragement of my girlfriend, realized a life-long dream of buying a Porsche (MacanS)! I might be penniless, but the bank (Porsche Financial Services) still likes me!
And on that note, I shall sign off.
Thank you for all your support guys and girls. I’ve been truly overwhelmed by all the comments and PMs I’ve received.
All the best,
Spuff
Nevertheless, the Hymer was my home for 7months and the Concorde for the remainder. Both of which served me well but the Concorde most definitely made the difference between being able to live and just surviving. Both of them however provided me with safe and comfortable space which I could also use to enjoy elsewhere and make some memories both with my daughter and alone. The Concorde also was instrumental in allowing myself and my new partner to enjoy time together and our first trip up to NW Scotland this time last year is so special in our memories that I will forever be grateful for the time we had and how the motorhome facilitated that experience.
Therefore, it was only fitting that Carrie’s transition from home to holiday home took place together with my partner last weekend. As I’ve mentioned previously, campsites in the UK are not very accommodating of full-timers and are also very seasonal. The biggest issue with fulltiming I’ve not found in living in close quarters, but the continual logistics of having to move every 28days to satisfy planning & licensing regulations of campsites. It has got to the point where I almost have to plan all of my trips to the UK around campsites rather than maximizing my time with my daughter. As a result, the closure of Cambridge C&CC Site for the winter forced my hand in terms of finally making the decision to move the van…………to Germany.
In Germany, the concept of Dauer Camping (longterm camping) is accepted and you are able to enter into contracts for occupying pitches for longer periods from 3, 6 and 12months. Although we have the VW camper in Frankfurt, its usage will be limited during the winter just purely down to insulation etc. so it makes sense to bring Carrie over to Frankfurt so that we can make use of her on weekends away, or longer trips down to the Alps to indulge our joint love of snowboarding.
So on Thursday evening last week, I left Cambridge site for the last time (after having lived there for c. 7 months this year) and set course for Stansted Airport to pick up my girlfriend. It was strange leaving Cambridge as I have begun to view it as home. The staff there were very friendly and welcoming but at times did stick inflexibly to the rules, which sometimes made me slightly bitter about having spent so much money there. That said, I love South Cambridge and feel very happy there. As a result it will probably be the place where myself and my girlfriend settle when we come back to the UK.
In terms of the trip – it was superb. On the face of it, it was a complete farce in terms of overnights and timing, but as with everything with my “new” relationship, everything has a habit of always working out for the best and so long as we’re still laughing (which is always the case), the world is well! J
Upon arriving at Stansted, I had the joy of parking next to a whole line of National Express coaches! J I’d phoned ahead to Stansted Airport the day before and enquired about parking due to the size of the van – they told me to use the coach station. In the end, it only cost me 14quid and I got my own personalized bus stop! When I met my girlfriend and took her down to the coachpark, she found it hilarious as we had to open the gate to get into the bus stop to the van! As a result of the delayed flight, we turned up late at Canterbury Aire and couldn’t get in, so ploughed on to Dover Seafront where we parked up and slept for the night ahead of an early ferry. The ferry over was great – calm seas and upgraded to Club Lounge so we had a nice breakie and young lady had champagne with hers – great start to the day. And then headed to a little Aire north of Arras given I had to work. The little Aire was delightful – only three spaces and I got the last one. Free hookup (which is great since the fridge is still not working on gas!) and I spent the day on the laptop whilst girlfriend read and researched out next holiday. I always make a point of spending money in towns with Aires, but this was so disappointing – at the end of a long day working, we went for a walk into town to find a nice square for drinks and dinner – but the whole place was run down and felt threatening. We ended up back at the van for a bowl of pasta.
The next day we woke late and had a lazy morning – breakfast outside on the picnic benches in the neighbouring park and then set off for Vimy Ridge Canadian War Memorial & Museum. A real tear-jerker and both of us found it very difficult to cope with the stories portrayed in the museum and learning just how futile the war in the trenches was. The preserved trenches really brought home how they were scrabbling over just 25m of earth at one stage! Anyway, it was so fascinating that we lost track of time and it was 4pm before we got on the road………………the sudden realization we had to be in Frankfurt by 5pm on Sunday and we had just 25hrs to get there meant we set course for Belgium without really a plan.
After looking at CamperContact app we found a lovely little Aire on the German/Belgium border. Turning up at 8pm meant all the spaces were gone! Gggrgrr.. So set off for another just 20mins away. Sadly this turned out to just be a carpark, which was spookily quiet. Other half was not impressed and felt threatened. I tried to calm her but it was obvious she wasn’t happy and our minds were firmly made up as the local chavs in their boyracer cars turned up to do laps of the carpark at 9pm. Soooooo, off we set again. An hour later we ended up at the top of Belgium’s highest mountain (yes, really! They actually have high ground!!) and spent the night in a parking lot with around 8 other vans. In the end, we had a great night sleep and set off the next morning along a mixture of a roads and autobahns to get to Frankfurt and our chosen campsite at 5pm on Sunday.
Upon arriving there, there was a mixture of excitement and sadness from me. So excited at the beginning of a new chapter – a chapter by which the van was going to be used as a holidaying vehicle and an end to my “mobile living”. Also a period where the van is truly mine and my partners and not just my space. But sadness because it’s a place where I have spent many nights with my daughter – a refuge for both of us and a place she truly feels at home in. I felt like I’d kind of betrayed her by bringing it to Germany. But that said, I know I had no other real choice and she will also be coming to Frankfurt to visit us in December, so will get to take her to the van then and we also plan on going snowboarding together in February halfterm, so she will be with us in Carrie then too. One of the conditions of my insurance is that the van is brought back before the MOT expires in May, so in any event, it won’t be in Germany all the time. But for a moment there, I certainly felt sad for my daughter.
Staying on the trip for one minute – we used around 160litres of fuel, equating to an average of 19mpg. Best I saw was on the first tank which did the whole of the UK, France and western Belgium – nearly 22mpg (which is a record in any event in my ownership now the brakes are sorted) and the worst I saw was 16mpg on the second tank which was down to the uphill and downdale nature of Eastern Belgium and the Eiffel Mountains in Germany. But still not so bad. The whole trip cost us around GBP 300 (inc. parking, ferry and diesel). It was a wonderful reminder for both of us at how much we enjoy travelling and spending time together in our little “home on wheels”. Another reminder also that my girlfriend has, over the last 14months together, become my very best friend. Someone with whom I can share the deepest secrets of my soul but also laugh with and lark around like a child – unjudged but ever supported.
In terms of the van – well Carrie is just superb. She will always need money spending on her – both discretionary as well as mandatory. But she’s in great nick and drove brilliantly on the way down. Having had the wheel alignment done made a massive difference to the ease of driving; literally just piloting her with a thumb and finger most of the way on the autobahn and she never missed a beat. I had her serviced before I left and came back with a clean bill of health. I also had a gas certificate produced – all is fine, but still haven’t got to the bottom of why the fridge isn’t working on gas (even when the freezer is). I fear the burner needs replacing, but if that doesn’t work, then I’ll have to bite the bullet and replace the fridge. At 2k (fitted), it’s something I’m trying to avoid, but the trip was a reminder that together with the toilet, the fridge is pretty much one of the most important devices on board. I’ll try and get that sorted in Germany and when she’s back in the UK, I’m going to treat her to a full detail and some new transfers on the rear. And in the meantime, I’ll be mounting my newly retrimmed leather steering wheel to replace the crap plastic one which comes with all Sprinters.
So that’s it folks. Life is good. Not just good – it’s brilliant. Back 18months ago when I started writing this blog I had no idea 1) how many people would be interested in my plight & how much support is out there on PH, 2) how I was going to get through the next few months, let alone years and 3) what the future would look like in any positive way.
Today I’m in a relationship which is 14months old but gets better with every day. None of the magic of the honeymoon period is lost. I’m loved, supported, listened to, championed, challenged and driven to be the best version of me that I can be. I have, for the first time outside of being a Son or a Father, experienced unconditional love and I am bowled over by how it has the ability to make everything life throws at you so much easier and outlook so much more positive. My daughter loves my partner and the feeling is mutual. For the moment I remain commuting to and from Frankfurt and UK but it is no longer a chore, but the new norm. I am 39 and living with my parents in the UK but I feel like I have everything. I have managed to pay off all my accumulated debts in spite of not getting more than 5k from my house sale and last week, with the support & encouragement of my girlfriend, realized a life-long dream of buying a Porsche (MacanS)! I might be penniless, but the bank (Porsche Financial Services) still likes me!
And on that note, I shall sign off.
Thank you for all your support guys and girls. I’ve been truly overwhelmed by all the comments and PMs I’ve received.
All the best,
Spuff
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Figured this thread was worth a quick update given that in 3 months things have changed again beyond recognition.....
I'm now divorced!
I got my Decree Absolute through on Friday. It was kind of bitter-sweet but not for the reasons you might think. My girlfriend and I had a dance around the flat in Frankfurt and toasted her not going out with a married man anymore (with hindsight I realise that this affected her quite a lot) and for me the end of a marriage which with hindsight was never really supposed to be. But it was bittersweet in the sense that although I'm technically "free", the path of negotiation with my ex-wife is continually a very up & down experience and will be for the next 12 years.
But it is good to have the bit of paper and know that lawyers, paperwork and giving away money is now behind me.
I have a flat!
Now that was definitely not in the planning. House was sold on 7th September and I received a paltry £5k which helped me clear the debts I'd run up and I then moved into my Mum & Dads house. The idea was to save as much money as possible. That was turned on its head within weeks through a mixture of difficulties with seeing my daughter and the commute between bottom and top of the M11 nearly burning me out. Much to my reticence (it was my girlfriend's idea), I rented a flat right next to the station I use for London. It's very convenient for London and 15-20mins from where my daughter now lives with her Mother. It's a lovely two-bed, two-bathroom, high end flat. It's kinda nice living somewhere so modern and cool - sort of reliving a part of my life that I didn't have when I was single/younger. But it is still over £1.2k a month on rent and bills which wasn't in the plan and £4-5k to kit out with furniture etc. However, it was a superb idea and after nearly two years of living in a motorhome, it's great to have a roof over my head and not worry about filling with water, emptying my toilet and moving every 28days. My daughter loves it - her room completely kitted out with bunk bed (she's always wanted one), playmate, Lego, desk, toy box (all in pink!) and lots of fluffy toys and cushions. It's great for her, great for me and lovely for when my girlfriend comes over, that we have our own space and not hemmed in my living at my parents (even though they've been awesome).
I have a Porsche!
Shortly after selling the house and suddenly having £3k a month to spare without a mortgage and housekeeping costs, an idle conversation took place between myself and my girlfriend about how I'd always wanted a Porsche. To my surprise, her response (unlike my ex's had been for the previous 12yrs) - if you want one, go and do it! A week later, I was sitting behind the wheel of my very own MacanS (petrol.......obvs!) and 8wks later I'm absolutely loving it 
I find it very difficult to express how lucky I feel to own such a wonderful motor and have been supported to do so by my girlfriend.
So although I have no money, I did have a 530d bought and paid for and Porsche Financial Services is still wants to be my friend!
The motorhome is in Frankfurt and although she hadn't moved in 8 weeks after I initially took her over, I took her for a spin around Frankfurt autobahn network on Sunday with my girlfriend and she started first time and felt her usual imperious self on the autobahn at 100kmh. Need to decide on how to use her over the winter as I'm getting to the point where we've actually considered selling her and the VW in contemplation of buying a house in the UK at some point in the next 18-24months. Together they're worth about £100k, so a lot of wonga just to have lying around not being used much.
Germany
Well, it's not happening for the moment. The terms I was offered were rubbish and then came the commitment of the flat, so I'm still commuting backwards and forwards. I reckon I do a minimum of 6 flights per month backwards and forwards. It's not glamorous but it works for the moment. Longterm, my girlfriend will move over here, but that depends on us both getting jobs which are UK based. We're working on it.
And finally - I have a girlfriend and daughter who I love and who love me unconditionally. That is a very special feeling.
Thank you again for all your support. I've got no idea what the next 3 months is going to hold but struggle to believe it will be as enormous as the last 3!
Happy Christmas everyone and here's to 2019!
I'm now divorced!
I got my Decree Absolute through on Friday. It was kind of bitter-sweet but not for the reasons you might think. My girlfriend and I had a dance around the flat in Frankfurt and toasted her not going out with a married man anymore (with hindsight I realise that this affected her quite a lot) and for me the end of a marriage which with hindsight was never really supposed to be. But it was bittersweet in the sense that although I'm technically "free", the path of negotiation with my ex-wife is continually a very up & down experience and will be for the next 12 years.
But it is good to have the bit of paper and know that lawyers, paperwork and giving away money is now behind me.
I have a flat!
Now that was definitely not in the planning. House was sold on 7th September and I received a paltry £5k which helped me clear the debts I'd run up and I then moved into my Mum & Dads house. The idea was to save as much money as possible. That was turned on its head within weeks through a mixture of difficulties with seeing my daughter and the commute between bottom and top of the M11 nearly burning me out. Much to my reticence (it was my girlfriend's idea), I rented a flat right next to the station I use for London. It's very convenient for London and 15-20mins from where my daughter now lives with her Mother. It's a lovely two-bed, two-bathroom, high end flat. It's kinda nice living somewhere so modern and cool - sort of reliving a part of my life that I didn't have when I was single/younger. But it is still over £1.2k a month on rent and bills which wasn't in the plan and £4-5k to kit out with furniture etc. However, it was a superb idea and after nearly two years of living in a motorhome, it's great to have a roof over my head and not worry about filling with water, emptying my toilet and moving every 28days. My daughter loves it - her room completely kitted out with bunk bed (she's always wanted one), playmate, Lego, desk, toy box (all in pink!) and lots of fluffy toys and cushions. It's great for her, great for me and lovely for when my girlfriend comes over, that we have our own space and not hemmed in my living at my parents (even though they've been awesome).
I have a Porsche!
Shortly after selling the house and suddenly having £3k a month to spare without a mortgage and housekeeping costs, an idle conversation took place between myself and my girlfriend about how I'd always wanted a Porsche. To my surprise, her response (unlike my ex's had been for the previous 12yrs) - if you want one, go and do it!
A week later, I was sitting behind the wheel of my very own MacanS (petrol.......obvs!) and 8wks later I'm absolutely loving it I find it very difficult to express how lucky I feel to own such a wonderful motor and have been supported to do so by my girlfriend. So although I have no money, I did have a 530d bought and paid for and Porsche Financial Services is still wants to be my friend!
The motorhome is in Frankfurt and although she hadn't moved in 8 weeks after I initially took her over, I took her for a spin around Frankfurt autobahn network on Sunday with my girlfriend and she started first time and felt her usual imperious self on the autobahn at 100kmh. Need to decide on how to use her over the winter as I'm getting to the point where we've actually considered selling her and the VW in contemplation of buying a house in the UK at some point in the next 18-24months. Together they're worth about £100k, so a lot of wonga just to have lying around not being used much.
Germany
Well, it's not happening for the moment. The terms I was offered were rubbish and then came the commitment of the flat, so I'm still commuting backwards and forwards. I reckon I do a minimum of 6 flights per month backwards and forwards. It's not glamorous but it works for the moment. Longterm, my girlfriend will move over here, but that depends on us both getting jobs which are UK based. We're working on it.
And finally - I have a girlfriend and daughter who I love and who love me unconditionally. That is a very special feeling.
Thank you again for all your support. I've got no idea what the next 3 months is going to hold but struggle to believe it will be as enormous as the last 3!
Happy Christmas everyone and here's to 2019!
Figured it was about time for a quick update.........so much has happened, it's even difficult for me to keep track!
I'm back in the UK - arrived this morning on the overnight ferry from Harwich. Quite a journey both in terms of distance travelled, weather encountered, missing my co-pilot (girlfriend had to stay in Frankfurt for the weekend) and most importantly; significant because this trip back is not just for the MOT, but marks the end of Carrie's tour of duty on the continent.
My girlfriend is moving to the UK to be with me and my daughter!
Although we considered at the start of the year that it would be a possibility, it all happened so quickly in February, when she was offered a job in London. When we first met, she was dead against the idea of London, but the move is tremendous career-wise and works perfectly for us and the life we want to build together. No more commuting and synchronising diaries 4months in advance. Only fly in the ointment is that I had taken out the lease on my "commuter flat" for 12 months..........now trying to squeeze two adults, plus my daughter into a 49sq m flat rather than the comfortable 120sq m we had in Frankfurt is something of a challenge! Not that big a challenge however - we've already got through me living in a motorhome, being separated but not yet divorced, house sale, divorce etc. so we can pretty much get through anything at this stage! We're both so excited and my little one to boot - she's absolutely over the moon that my girlfriend is moving in with us and early June just seems like years away to her!!
But what about the motorhome? Well, she's been put to good service since she's been over. Initially, after having taken her over in October, we didn't use her at all. Only once taking her out for a spin around the Frankfurt Autobahn network to keep her ticking over. But once into the New Year, we properly embraced her. Having a girlfriend who is bordering obsessive about snowboarding and me having slowly been taken over by it to, we decided to use her as our ski base for the season. We planned four trips - only made three. First trip was to St Anton, Austria in January. Oodles of snow and minus-20degs C lows. The van coped beautifully. Only issues were a couple of frozen lockers and one of the fridge vents popping out due to the cold contracting the bodywork. But otherwise we were toasty warm at 24degs C inside. This was a dry run for the main event - Half Term Holiday with my daughter. This time we headed for Saalbach Hinterglem - van again performed brilliantly. Bear in mind that each time we're doing a 9hr drive from Frankfurt to Austria, it's so comfortable that you can do it pretty much in just two hits (one stop for lunch). With the heated garage, the boards dried off nicely and with the heated cupboard above the boiler, the jackets dry off nicely too. Sorted!
The final trip wasn't so great - back to Saalbach, but for me it was the day after a wisdom tooth extraction so no snowboarding for me. My girlfriend - well, within the first hour out on the slopes, she comes back with a suspected torn ligament in her ankle and is taken to the hospital, returns with a cast and told not to board for the rest of the season! Heyho. Best laid plans and all that!
So, following that little escapade, Carrie has been used for odd weekends away - Rothenburg ob der Tauber and Koblenz. And then this weekend, as a mule to bring back the following to the UK: mobile aircon unit for the flat, 4 x winter wheels for the Kepler, bikes, awning for the Kepler, seats & tables for the Kepler, snowboards, pot plants, guitar - you name it, I had it on board. Good job I was on my own as I'm quite sure I was just under the 6,000kg gross limit.
But as ever, Carrie didn't miss a beat. I cruised at 90kmh all the way back across Eiffel National Park, Belgium, Zeeland (NW Holland) and then on to Hook of Holland, Harwich and back to Cambridge. Even with all that weight on board I averaged 18mpg which wasn't too bad IMO.
What next? Well, on the personal side, it's very much about trying to bed my girlfriend down in the UK. Having never lived here before she doesn't "exist" so doing all the paperwork has been "fun". It's also about getting her used to living here and I will be playing a very supportive role in making that happen and making her feel at home here. Then more of the same - daughter time (which I love) and joint future planning.
It's all looking very rosy.
I'm back in the UK - arrived this morning on the overnight ferry from Harwich. Quite a journey both in terms of distance travelled, weather encountered, missing my co-pilot (girlfriend had to stay in Frankfurt for the weekend) and most importantly; significant because this trip back is not just for the MOT, but marks the end of Carrie's tour of duty on the continent.
My girlfriend is moving to the UK to be with me and my daughter!
Although we considered at the start of the year that it would be a possibility, it all happened so quickly in February, when she was offered a job in London. When we first met, she was dead against the idea of London, but the move is tremendous career-wise and works perfectly for us and the life we want to build together. No more commuting and synchronising diaries 4months in advance. Only fly in the ointment is that I had taken out the lease on my "commuter flat" for 12 months..........now trying to squeeze two adults, plus my daughter into a 49sq m flat rather than the comfortable 120sq m we had in Frankfurt is something of a challenge! Not that big a challenge however - we've already got through me living in a motorhome, being separated but not yet divorced, house sale, divorce etc. so we can pretty much get through anything at this stage! We're both so excited and my little one to boot - she's absolutely over the moon that my girlfriend is moving in with us and early June just seems like years away to her!!
But what about the motorhome? Well, she's been put to good service since she's been over. Initially, after having taken her over in October, we didn't use her at all. Only once taking her out for a spin around the Frankfurt Autobahn network to keep her ticking over. But once into the New Year, we properly embraced her. Having a girlfriend who is bordering obsessive about snowboarding and me having slowly been taken over by it to, we decided to use her as our ski base for the season. We planned four trips - only made three. First trip was to St Anton, Austria in January. Oodles of snow and minus-20degs C lows. The van coped beautifully. Only issues were a couple of frozen lockers and one of the fridge vents popping out due to the cold contracting the bodywork. But otherwise we were toasty warm at 24degs C inside. This was a dry run for the main event - Half Term Holiday with my daughter. This time we headed for Saalbach Hinterglem - van again performed brilliantly. Bear in mind that each time we're doing a 9hr drive from Frankfurt to Austria, it's so comfortable that you can do it pretty much in just two hits (one stop for lunch). With the heated garage, the boards dried off nicely and with the heated cupboard above the boiler, the jackets dry off nicely too. Sorted!
The final trip wasn't so great - back to Saalbach, but for me it was the day after a wisdom tooth extraction so no snowboarding for me. My girlfriend - well, within the first hour out on the slopes, she comes back with a suspected torn ligament in her ankle and is taken to the hospital, returns with a cast and told not to board for the rest of the season! Heyho. Best laid plans and all that!
So, following that little escapade, Carrie has been used for odd weekends away - Rothenburg ob der Tauber and Koblenz. And then this weekend, as a mule to bring back the following to the UK: mobile aircon unit for the flat, 4 x winter wheels for the Kepler, bikes, awning for the Kepler, seats & tables for the Kepler, snowboards, pot plants, guitar - you name it, I had it on board. Good job I was on my own as I'm quite sure I was just under the 6,000kg gross limit.
But as ever, Carrie didn't miss a beat. I cruised at 90kmh all the way back across Eiffel National Park, Belgium, Zeeland (NW Holland) and then on to Hook of Holland, Harwich and back to Cambridge. Even with all that weight on board I averaged 18mpg which wasn't too bad IMO.
What next? Well, on the personal side, it's very much about trying to bed my girlfriend down in the UK. Having never lived here before she doesn't "exist" so doing all the paperwork has been "fun". It's also about getting her used to living here and I will be playing a very supportive role in making that happen and making her feel at home here. Then more of the same - daughter time (which I love) and joint future planning.
It's all looking very rosy.
Turn7 said:
Just for peace of mind, tell us this wasnt Carrie....
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-sussex-48175...
Nope - not mine thankfully. All safely parked up in Cambridge.https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-sussex-48175...
Thanks for the best wishes.
Thanks for all the replies. Again, as usual, delighted to get so many lovely comments.
For all you guys and girls who like a happy ending (stop giggling at the back!), I couldn't help but share a little update......
Girlfriend moved over to the UK some seven weeks ago now. She got a new job (pretty senior one too) in the City of London and we're settling into life in Blighty.......well, sort of - both of us still travelling a lot. But it's lovely to have one place that we both call home and a place we both return to rather than going our separate ways each time.
My daughter loves the new setup and loves spending time with the pair of us.
So what's the news? Well, having spent the last 6wks looking for a larger place to live (we're in my 49sqm flat) and having found nothing but dross on the rental market, we've bitten the bullet and buying a house together! After looking at loads, we finally went a bit left-field in terms of location - it's actually a great location, but previously not on the OH list. And we found ourselves a brand new build "barn conversion" - a four bedroom "mansion" of a house which gets us to 200sqm and loads of living and entertaining space. We're over the moon and today had the message that our mortgage has been approved subject to valuation (which hopefully should be a slam dunk).
Can't wait to tell the little one, who has grown tired of being shoe-horned into the flat and desperately wants a flight of stairs to feel like she's in a house. We're waiting until Exchange to blind-side her with the news! She'll be over the moon when she sees her enormous bedroom and the fact she's not only got one floor to go up, but two! Exchange scheduled for 12th August and Completion a month later.
We're over the moon and can't quite believe how quickly everything has happened. We celebrate our two year anniversary in a couple of weeks time and when we think about how far we've come, both metaphorically, physically and emotionally, it's amazing. I'm hoping we can exchange contracts on the house on our anniversary - a superb way to celebrate. And we're as happy as the day we met. I've never had a relationship do anything other than get boring or staid as time has gone on. Invariably it's lost that bit of magic after six months or a year, but this keeps getting better and better. And that's why in spite of everything happening quickly, I know it's for real and it's right.
I'll share a bit more once we're in!
For all you guys and girls who like a happy ending (stop giggling at the back!), I couldn't help but share a little update......
Girlfriend moved over to the UK some seven weeks ago now. She got a new job (pretty senior one too) in the City of London and we're settling into life in Blighty.......well, sort of - both of us still travelling a lot. But it's lovely to have one place that we both call home and a place we both return to rather than going our separate ways each time.
My daughter loves the new setup and loves spending time with the pair of us.
So what's the news? Well, having spent the last 6wks looking for a larger place to live (we're in my 49sqm flat) and having found nothing but dross on the rental market, we've bitten the bullet and buying a house together!
After looking at loads, we finally went a bit left-field in terms of location - it's actually a great location, but previously not on the OH list. And we found ourselves a brand new build "barn conversion" - a four bedroom "mansion" of a house which gets us to 200sqm and loads of living and entertaining space. We're over the moon and today had the message that our mortgage has been approved subject to valuation (which hopefully should be a slam dunk).Can't wait to tell the little one, who has grown tired of being shoe-horned into the flat and desperately wants a flight of stairs to feel like she's in a house. We're waiting until Exchange to blind-side her with the news! She'll be over the moon when she sees her enormous bedroom and the fact she's not only got one floor to go up, but two! Exchange scheduled for 12th August and Completion a month later.
We're over the moon and can't quite believe how quickly everything has happened. We celebrate our two year anniversary in a couple of weeks time and when we think about how far we've come, both metaphorically, physically and emotionally, it's amazing. I'm hoping we can exchange contracts on the house on our anniversary - a superb way to celebrate. And we're as happy as the day we met. I've never had a relationship do anything other than get boring or staid as time has gone on. Invariably it's lost that bit of magic after six months or a year, but this keeps getting better and better. And that's why in spite of everything happening quickly, I know it's for real and it's right.
I'll share a bit more once we're in!
It’s coming up a year since my last update and as I mentioned previously, we were on the cusp of something new. This time a year ago we placed a deposit on a brand new barn conversion style property on a lovely new estate. Eight weeks later we were moved in and haven’t looked back.
Given this was all about fulltiming, it would be remiss of me not to mention the motorhome. Although ours was the only remaining property and we felt we’d got the worst plot (it’s all relative) it actually turned out to be fabulous. We have a 10.5m long parking space outside the house, so The Concorde fits perfectly (at 9m long) and although we don’t have her parked there all the time, it’s great to be able to bring her back to the house to do work on her or prepare or unload before/after a trip. She’s quite the talk of the estate and being able to spend some time on her, she’s looking in superb nick. I’ve done lots of maintenance both preventative and reactive on her. I had to rebuild the rear double bed recently since Concorde’s poor design had weakened the end of it. It’s now super tight and won’t be wobbling anymore. I’ve painted the grill and some exposed metal to tidy her up and she’s recently had a full service, brake fluid change and passed her MOT for another year. I’ve therefore treated her to a new headunit with Apple CarPlay, Waze and all the usual 21st century bits which she’s currently lacking with her 2005 vintage ICE and nav system. The plan this year is to head to France or Germany once the quarantine is lifted and do some touring with little lady and my Partner.
After that we have to see............since in October, I’m due to become a Father again! Super exciting news and makes me marvel when I look back at this thread on what a journey it has been and how much better life is now than back when I started writing it. There’s no way that anyone could’ve known what lay ahead and I certainly wouldn’t have believed it if someone had told me.
So for now, the expenditure on the motorhome is the last discretionary spend I can get away with before we start on the baby stuff purchasing. My daughter is over the moon with the news and delighted to be part of a bigger family and so happy and proud she will be a big sister. The reaction to the news last week was pure gold and so heartwarming. We’re now 22wks and counting. Exciting times ahead!
I’m guessing that really is the fairy tale ending, so any further blogging I do will be about my motorhome only.
Thank you so much for all your support throughout. And for anyone going through something similar, hang in there. Life has a funny way of turning out ok, no matter how bad it may seem.
Given this was all about fulltiming, it would be remiss of me not to mention the motorhome. Although ours was the only remaining property and we felt we’d got the worst plot (it’s all relative) it actually turned out to be fabulous. We have a 10.5m long parking space outside the house, so The Concorde fits perfectly (at 9m long) and although we don’t have her parked there all the time, it’s great to be able to bring her back to the house to do work on her or prepare or unload before/after a trip. She’s quite the talk of the estate and being able to spend some time on her, she’s looking in superb nick. I’ve done lots of maintenance both preventative and reactive on her. I had to rebuild the rear double bed recently since Concorde’s poor design had weakened the end of it. It’s now super tight and won’t be wobbling anymore. I’ve painted the grill and some exposed metal to tidy her up and she’s recently had a full service, brake fluid change and passed her MOT for another year. I’ve therefore treated her to a new headunit with Apple CarPlay, Waze and all the usual 21st century bits which she’s currently lacking with her 2005 vintage ICE and nav system. The plan this year is to head to France or Germany once the quarantine is lifted and do some touring with little lady and my Partner.
After that we have to see............since in October, I’m due to become a Father again! Super exciting news and makes me marvel when I look back at this thread on what a journey it has been and how much better life is now than back when I started writing it. There’s no way that anyone could’ve known what lay ahead and I certainly wouldn’t have believed it if someone had told me.
So for now, the expenditure on the motorhome is the last discretionary spend I can get away with before we start on the baby stuff purchasing. My daughter is over the moon with the news and delighted to be part of a bigger family and so happy and proud she will be a big sister. The reaction to the news last week was pure gold and so heartwarming. We’re now 22wks and counting. Exciting times ahead!
I’m guessing that really is the fairy tale ending, so any further blogging I do will be about my motorhome only.
Thank you so much for all your support throughout. And for anyone going through something similar, hang in there. Life has a funny way of turning out ok, no matter how bad it may seem.
Gosh, just been reminded of this thread after my T6 post.
Just to round it off as I realise it was left hanging.
I now have a wonderful 16month old son who is super fun, playful, adventurous, chilled and loving. He and his 9yr old sister are like peas in a pod - both very similar looking but also great mates and play really well together.
My Partner and I got engaged 6wks ago and should be busy planning a wedding. But more likely will continue as we are and just do a registry office jobber and small family shin dig.
And to bring it back to motorhoming, Carrie the Concorde was sold in October last year. In her four and a bit years with me she kept myself, Partner and daughter safe and warm and gave us a place to call home. The fact she also provided a base for some truly life affirming adventures was the icing on top.
Unfortunately however as time moved on, she became a bit of a drag. She was quite Labour intensive as an older van and although I was still able to fix 90% of the issues myself, time has become ever more a precious commodity. Bringing Carrie backwards and forwards from the storage yard to the house to do work or go on trips made her ever less the spontaneous adventure bus. And with the little one making logistics more challenging, we decided reluctantly to move her on to someone who could give her the TLC she needed and deserved.
It was a very sad day when she left our stewardship and every now and again I look back on photos and reminisce on how amazing it was to own her. But it was the right decision. The proceeds from her sale we’re invested into landscaping our garden and doing lots of additional work to the house to make it our perfect family home. There’s a lovely cyclicality to her having been my home to now making OUR home ours.
I’m sure, like everyone, life will throw more challenges my way but I feel very grateful for the journey I’ve been on over the last 5yrs. It’s a sage lesson to us all that when life looks its most bleak, there are always opportunities and bright days around the corner, even if they take a while to be realised.
Thanks again for all your support. It really did help me through those darkest moments.
Just to round it off as I realise it was left hanging.
I now have a wonderful 16month old son who is super fun, playful, adventurous, chilled and loving. He and his 9yr old sister are like peas in a pod - both very similar looking but also great mates and play really well together.
My Partner and I got engaged 6wks ago and should be busy planning a wedding. But more likely will continue as we are and just do a registry office jobber and small family shin dig.
And to bring it back to motorhoming, Carrie the Concorde was sold in October last year. In her four and a bit years with me she kept myself, Partner and daughter safe and warm and gave us a place to call home. The fact she also provided a base for some truly life affirming adventures was the icing on top.
Unfortunately however as time moved on, she became a bit of a drag. She was quite Labour intensive as an older van and although I was still able to fix 90% of the issues myself, time has become ever more a precious commodity. Bringing Carrie backwards and forwards from the storage yard to the house to do work or go on trips made her ever less the spontaneous adventure bus. And with the little one making logistics more challenging, we decided reluctantly to move her on to someone who could give her the TLC she needed and deserved.
It was a very sad day when she left our stewardship and every now and again I look back on photos and reminisce on how amazing it was to own her. But it was the right decision. The proceeds from her sale we’re invested into landscaping our garden and doing lots of additional work to the house to make it our perfect family home. There’s a lovely cyclicality to her having been my home to now making OUR home ours.
I’m sure, like everyone, life will throw more challenges my way but I feel very grateful for the journey I’ve been on over the last 5yrs. It’s a sage lesson to us all that when life looks its most bleak, there are always opportunities and bright days around the corner, even if they take a while to be realised.
Thanks again for all your support. It really did help me through those darkest moments.
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