Stupid Things Petrolheads Say

[chilled901]

EDLT said:

"Stance" otherwise known as "too low to actually use"

"Hella flush is a lifestyle, yo."

[alock]

Chicane-UK said:

kbee540 said:

2. "Point to point, faster than xxxx"; usually in regards to some Subarishi rally rep - probably originated in Evo magazine who seem to believe (less so lately) that driving fast down a farm track is the only measure of a performance car. Surely depends on the points in question, the driver, traffic, etc. "So your £25k Scooby is faster than the latest 600hp Lambo, eh?" Right....

Sorry but I think that statement still holds water. It's not about outright performance.. it's about how well the car grips and how well it can use the power available to it. On point to point type twisty roads, I'd still say that a very well sorted grippy car like the Impreza would punish a big brutal supercar. I'm sure there have been many road tests which show this to be the case...

And I don't say that as someone who owns a car which would compete in either the "quick & grippy" or supercar stakes - it just seems blindingly obvious.

The recent EVO article was good where they tested an Enzo against the latest crop of hatches:
http://www.evo.co.uk/videos/planetevovideos/266146...

[Lemans Party]

"Well sorted"


Cringeworthy!

[Regiment]

eg Watermelon said:

"I don't know why people buy new cars!"

Well if they didn't you wouldn't have used ones....

One of the things that really irks me on here, infact, i don't think i've seen someone ask what new car they should buy.

Oh and the MX5 thing as well, and if someone says that the MX5 isn't fast enough, then a supercharged MX5 is suggested

edit: infact, when someone says they have 12,000 to spend on a car, i want to see more replies of "why not buy the new Corsa, you'll be able to cut it out pretty well with 12,000

[renrut]

Lucas North said:

renrut said:

Headlamp aim is part of the MOT test and they do check having had 2 cars fail this in the last 3 years. One was a case of a new headlamp unit, the other was a bit of ingenuity and an oven. Get it fixed.

Other half's car failed on headlamp alignment. Hers could be sorted, as they were just pissed and not broken, so they immediately issued a pass after sorting it. But get them fixed before MOT time!

In my defence for those 2 cases - 1st one I didn't know was broken. It was the adjustment was seized in place but with the correct aim and broke when the MOT tester thought he could get a better aim on it - £60 for a good 2nd hand lamp. Annoying as that was the only failure!

2nd car I'd had for 35 mins and it was more a case of what didn't it need - 3 pages of failures, the headlamp was the least of the worries, the wheels hitting the ARB and the brakes made of brie were more concerning. That was just a case of taking the lamp apart and reattaching the adjuster bit with some lockwire rather than the broken plastic clip thing.

[The Black Flash]

"Drop in" when used to refer to an engine swap.

I'm sure it started as a semi-ironic thing, but it really bugs me when said by someone who's probably never even had a head off.

[ZeeTacoe]

GroundEffect said:

When people go out of their way to mention the torque figure of their car and try to compare it with another.

...have they never worked out what a gearbox was for?

whoa, everyone knows that you are supposed to drive round in top using the torque.

[Boba Fret]

"Of course it's fantastic.....It's a BMW"

[The Restorer]

"So very attractive single young lady, you know a bit about cars. How do you heel and toe then?"

... turns to mate

"... Where'd she go"

[thinfourth2]

All RWD cars are better then FWD cars

[zakelwe]

"Weight affects C02 figures".

Common mistake, weight has nothing to do with the CO2 figures given for cars.

Andy

[JohnnyRims]

When you get 'petrolheads' telling you the best thing you could do with your £12k is buy a high mileage Maserati 3200 when they're driving around in a brand new diesel Golf.

Linked in with this is the fanboy favourite of 'reliable if well maintained' - where 'maintenance' can encompass seemingly anything including engine rebuilds. Common favourites are the cambelts on Twinspark Alfa Romeos and the problems with rotary engines - yeah I can stop the engine going pop by forking out for work which I wouldn't have to do/would have to do far less often with other comparable cars. If you're going to be a fanboy, be one about attributes your car actually has (I like Alfas and RX7/8s before anyone starts) but don't try and 'have it all' by claiming reliability!

[Sneaky Schnell]

Visceral

vis·cer·al

adjective /ˈvis(ə)rəl/ 

1. Of or relating to the viscera
* - the visceral nervous system

2. Relating to deep inward feelings rather than to the intellect
* - the voters' visceral fear of change

A great word but unfortunately it is becoming overused.
It is now difficult to read an article regarding any track oriented or otherwise raw car without seeing this little gem crop up.

Cars of note:
GT3
F40
Caterhams
Atoms
etc.

[so called]

TVR's are unreliable.

[Synchromesh]

zakelwe said:

"Weight affects C02 figures".

Common mistake, weight has nothing to do with the CO2 figures given for cars.

Andy

Surely more mass needs more energy to get it to a given speed as KE=1/2 mv^2. Thus more power is needed so more fuel is burned so more carbon dioxides are released.

Or are you thinking along the lines of in the official EU test, where it is done on a rolling road, so weight and aero are not factored in?

[sooperscoop]

JohnnyRims said:

When you get 'petrolheads' telling you the best thing you could do with your £12k is buy a high mileage Maserati 3200 when they're driving around in a brand new diesel Golf.

I'm going to twin this with "I was looking at buying a.....". No you weren't. Reading Autotrader and the PH Classifieds does not constitute "looking to buy". Usually the more outlandish the claim, the crappier the car they actually drive. "I was looking at mid-90s 911s" whilst twirling the keys to a diesel Fiesta.

[redstu]

"pride & joy".

[Mastodon2]

alock said:

The recent EVO article was good where they tested an Enzo against the latest crop of hatches:
http://www.evo.co.uk/videos/planetevovideos/266146...

The article where they tested and Enzo against the latest metal..on super smooth French roads, and by "tested" I mean got some photos, a little bit of video footage, drove a little bit over the speed limit in each car (but not too much, their insurance premiums are big enough!) and then wrote whatever the fk they wanted to about the cars, as long as the Enzo came out on top by a massive margin? Don't shatter the legends, yo.

Stupid st petrolheads say...

"RWD is superior" - not an absolute truth, not by a long shot.

"throttle adjustability" - Like you balance those long, sweeping slides day in, day out right?

"More than 2 doors is a family car" - Really?

"You drive a Fiesta ST? You cannot have an Elise as your next car, you will crash" - ludicrous.

"Quiet is the new loud" - time to get the slippers on and the tartan blanket across the knees perhaps?

[grumpy52]

"you can't be any good at driving look at the old car you drive"
"i've got me bigger wheels an tyres so thats me andlin sorted"

[rhinochopig]

Mastodon2 said:

alock said:

The recent EVO article was good where they tested an Enzo against the latest crop of hatches:
http://www.evo.co.uk/videos/planetevovideos/266146...

The article where they tested and Enzo against the latest metal..on super smooth French roads, and by "tested" I mean got some photos, a little bit of video footage, drove a little bit over the speed limit in each car (but not too much, their insurance premiums are big enough!) and then wrote whatever the fk they wanted to about the cars, as long as the Enzo came out on top by a massive margin? Don't shatter the legends, yo.

Stupid st petrolheads say...

"RWD is superior" - not an absolute truth, not by a long shot.

"throttle adjustability" - Like you balance those long, sweeping slides day in, day out right?

"More than 2 doors is a family car" - Really?

"You drive a Fiesta ST? You cannot have an Elise as your next car, you will crash" - ludicrous.

"Quiet is the new loud" - time to get the slippers on and the tartan blanket across the knees perhaps?

With the greatest respect, that's wrong, as throttle adjustability can mean simply the tightening a line by coming off the throttle. You certainly don't need to be sideways for the throttle to affect the yaw of a car.