Worst cliches used in car advert descriptions
Discussion
I also found this seller to have some funny cliches at times http://www.ebay.co.uk/sch/carswithnoreserve/m.html... I remember when they had a 3.0 CDTI Vectra and wrote that ' it was extremely quick on the road test' and then going on to say that it now doesn't run.
I've been looking at 328s alot, I saw one on gumtree that had a pretty heavy front end hit and was being broken for spares. Bumper, radiator, n/s wing, bonnet, slam panel, N/S suspension all f
ked. Saw the same car on autotrader a month later with panels in a different shade of red and a wonky bumper, with "immaculate condition, this car has been very well looked after, genuine standard example, HPI clear!!" in the description 
ked. Saw the same car on autotrader a month later with panels in a different shade of red and a wonky bumper, with "immaculate condition, this car has been very well looked after, genuine standard example, HPI clear!!" in the description WeirdNeville said:
There was a garage in Leicester which used to run a brilliant little ad-box in the Leicester Mercury. It contained such gems as:
"First to see will Cry"
"Slight rust - Buyer brings own dustpan"
"Saturn 5 Milage, Johnny 5 power"
And various others. It was always worth a Read.
Those are great "First to see will Cry"
"Slight rust - Buyer brings own dustpan"
"Saturn 5 Milage, Johnny 5 power"
And various others. It was always worth a Read.
benjj said:
- drives 40 miles to see*
- arrives at festering hovel with broken couch in front garden, pitbull growling by front door, pizza boxes everywhere, sky dish & 175 inch TV proudly displayed in front window*
You forgot 400 children running around everywhere underfoot, with hundreds of broken toys littering every floor surface, and no stair carpet.And why do houses like these always smell of cooking? When nothing's actually being cooked at the time? Even their bloody clothes always smell of cooking!!
"Highly maintained and immaculate throughout" or "complete with extensive maintenance portfolio"
Both frequently seen on the adverts of a trader who wentto prison for 6 months on a long Caribbean cruise, for faking service histories and selling cars with misleading adverts
Both frequently seen on the adverts of a trader who went
Edited by AndrewW-G on Monday 13th February 20:11
FSH - "can I see the service book?" sellers reply "I lost it" or look through to find the next service is due in a few thousand miles.
Full <insert manufacturer> service history - "what garage is this?" sellers reply " a friend but it was serviced by the manufacturer before then"
The tyres/discs/pads we're replaced xxxx miles ago - they need replacing soon.
The car is as new.
"The car is ££££'s underpriced" - "so why have you had it nearly a year?"
Cheapest in the country - condition usually tells you why!
Full <insert manufacturer> service history - "what garage is this?" sellers reply " a friend but it was serviced by the manufacturer before then"
The tyres/discs/pads we're replaced xxxx miles ago - they need replacing soon.
The car is as new.
"The car is ££££'s underpriced" - "so why have you had it nearly a year?"
Cheapest in the country - condition usually tells you why!
julianm said:
Current Renault ad - apparently the nice young man can afford a degree, buy a Renault, buy a house, get married & have a child all in 4 years. He then needs a bigger Renault. All in the recession soaked UK in 2012. Perhaps the writer was thinking of 1972.
It's apt that you bring this advert up in this thread - I think the ad is one of the most horrendous advertising cliches ever!They depict the bloke going through the usual, boring stages of growing up and frankly, in my opinion, ending up a dull, 'broken man', piloting a child wagon around ad in finitum.
I bet his name is 'Josh' and he works in marketing. The
.What his missus doesn't realise however, is that by the time he's 25, Josh is fed up with his boring monotonous life, and realises he's missed out on all the fun his peers had in their late teens. So he starts fabricating 'business meetings' but in reality is spending nights away in hotel rooms with w
es and drugs.He ends up shagging the 17 year old office intern, she gets pregnant, the whole sorry story gets out and he ends up in a messy divorce.
The wife gets the house, and Josh ends up in a grotty flat in Hackney. The Renault MPV is long gone, and as the CSA are taking half of Josh's wages at source, all he can afford now is a 120,000 miles 'T' plate Renault Clio, without it's wheel trims.
Hmm, thinking about it, Renault missed a trick - if they lengthened the advert to my version, they could end it by saying 'Look at Josh's 'T' plate Clio! Despite being 13 years old with 120,000 miles racked up in London it's still going strong, doesn't use much oil, isn't that rattly, and only has a bit of rust along the bottom of the doors and rear arches. See how good our cars last!!
They didn't think it through. French t
ts.Edited by Ray Luxury-Yacht on Monday 13th February 20:29
Froomee said:
The tyres/discs/pads we're replaced xxxx miles ago - they need replacing soon.
Hmmm, I got done with this one.Buying my car:
"Recent brakes" Is that all round? "Yes mate". Funny, the fronts are lipped... In the history: Rear brakes and pads done 20,000 miles ago... Fronts done 30,000 miles ago! Not really Recent... 4 years ago as it happens. Thankfully I'd found the prices for consumables beforehand and negotiated another £300 off for that- £250 worth of parts.
Gassing Station | General Gassing | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff