Driving in the Northwest :-(

Driving in the Northwest :-(

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podwin

Original Poster:

652 posts

203 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
I’m furious at the old witch this morning in her nice little red Fiat 500, who is incompetent at understanding the simple fking rules of a roundabout, which is mainly to give way to traffic from the right / give way to traffic already on the roundabout.

I commute on the St Helens Linkway most mornings and everyday seems to have some demonstration at how fking incompetent the morons of St Helens are. Nowhere else have I witnessed such st driving as performed by the fking inbreds of this area of St Helens. Roundabouts seem to confuse the fking wkers and they simply don’t give a st!

This morning I enter this roundabout taking the path shown.

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I see the stupid old bag enter the roundabout where this white pickup is, not looking to her right at all.

|http://thumbsnap.com/T4nDzMUn[/url][url]

Sometime this happens, but every time it has people are taking the first exit, so it kind of works out, I just end up in lane 2 of the A58, but not this time, she simply swerves into the side of my car, again the fking st for brains old bag isn’t looking to her right, or indicating. I have to swerve heavy to the right and stamp on the brakes, and she is fking waving!

The fking nasty old bh! I’m now sat stationary on a busy roundabout and thinking about giving chase, but that’s just going to make matters worse. So I have to go back around and get on with things.

At this same roundabout someone has straight lined me before, forcing me to take avoiding action.

|http://thumbsnap.com/frxfEP64[/url][url]

At the next roundabout I’ve been straight lined here:

|http://thumbsnap.com/gnA4MQnD[/url][url]

and straight lined going the other way

|http://thumbsnap.com/Tpz74YRz[/url][url]

And at the roundabout before the first one, but that isn’t on any map yet.

The fking morons indicate left when they are going straight on, or right, and indicate right when they’re fking turning left, off the roundabout. If you drive through this driving hell hole of a st hole, you haven’t a clue what to do.

Why is this? Why is this area so full of stupid fking st-for brains, cretinous, moronic, selfish, ignorant, rude, incompetent, dangerous, inbred, bds who shouldn’t be allowed to tie their own fking shoe laces let alone drive a car.

I have unofficially named this area, “The St Helens bd Triangle”

|http://thumbsnap.com/Pg88qKRE[/url]

If you enter your car will be damaged or you will be killed.

I have lived in different places, such as Ipswich and Oxford. I used to commute from Abingdon to Slough everyday, drive into London for a conference at the Grosvenor every month, driven through France, up to Scotland and so on, and no where I have experienced has shown such ineptitude as the drivers on the roads of St Helens. They are so fking thick! They drive like there is no one else around them.

I wish the police would sit in a few lay-bys during rush hour times just to look at this gross incompetence, but no, they’d rather sit on the motorways where it’s more fun.

I not perfect, I’ve made mistakes, but unless you are two years old, how the fk can you mistake a circle for straight line?

Drivers of St Helens, I have a news flash, roundabouts placed as a junction connecting two or more roads are fkING ROUND! So even if you are going straight on, you still need to turn the fking steering wheel! Maybe a little to left at first, then a little to the right, to follow the contour of the fking circle you fking bunch of morons!

Oh, and a special message to the OAP in the Fiat 500.
1. At roundabouts you are required to check for vehicles coming from your right (that’s the side window on your car closest to you), you may have to turn your head to do this, if you are unfamiliar with this, please see your doctor.
2. When you have completed this simple check, and your pea brain does indeed register a vehicle on the roundabout, going around the roundabout, which is a circle, stop.
3. That’s right, fkING STOP, and wait for that vehicle to go past before you enter the roundabout.
4. Be careful, there maybe another car behind it, if so, go back to step 1 and repeat.
I feel a little better.

Thank you.

Jamie VTS

1,238 posts

148 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
Lost me at the second paragraph. Good use of arrows!

StottyZr

6,860 posts

164 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
I will give 10/10 yes

RP1

252 posts

151 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
podwin said:
Driving in the North West UK
Fixed that for you.

ZakTroy

76 posts

148 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
Brilliant rant!

I hope she reverses into her house, hits the gas main springing a leak and revs!

The Moose

22,884 posts

210 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
StottyZr said:
I will give 10/10 yes
yes

Swearing, insulting an entire area of people, vast generalisations, DIAGRAMS thumbup

Successful rant, sir!

8Ace

2,697 posts

199 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
The Moose said:
yes

Swearing, insulting an entire area of people, vast generalisations, DIAGRAMS thumbup

Successful rant, sir!
Agree. The diagrams are what elevated this to the level of master rant. Well done.

mnkiboy

4,409 posts

167 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
If it's any consolation, just down the road in Warrington is almost as bad.

Red traffic lights don't mean stop until they've been at red for five seconds. When queueing you must block all entrances and exists, especially if it says 'KEEP CLEAR' on the road surface.
There are no lanes on a roundabout, you can take up any position and take any exit, even if there is a car on your left in the way.
30mph limit means 45mph
30mph limit means 55mph
30mph limit means 65mph
If you pull out in front of someone on a roundabout, they are wrong, not you. Especially if you drove through a red light to get there.

ArsE92

21,020 posts

188 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
One of the best rants of the year so far. OP definitely put some thought into this one.


SSBB

695 posts

157 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
Relentless. 10/10.

angusc43

11,511 posts

209 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
8Ace said:
The Moose said:
yes

Swearing, insulting an entire area of people, vast generalisations, DIAGRAMS thumbup

Successful rant, sir!
Agree. The diagrams are what elevated this to the level of master rant. Well done.
Superb rant. Diagrams, swearing and regional racism. Top drawer.

TheTurbonator

2,792 posts

152 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
StottyZr said:
I will give 10/10 yes
Agreed.

gtdc

4,259 posts

284 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
8Ace said:
The Moose said:
yes

Swearing, insulting an entire area of people, vast generalisations, DIAGRAMS thumbup

Successful rant, sir!
Agree. The diagrams are what elevated this to the level of master rant. Well done.
10/10 and a gold star and a Mars Bar. The best rant I've read for years. Thank you for your work.

Tophatron

425 posts

222 months

Monday 19th March 2012
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In all those pictures, the lack of lane markings is shocking. I doubt that helps!

Boydie88

3,283 posts

150 months

Monday 19th March 2012
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Straightliners are fk tards of the highest order. I do enjoy making the gap (controlably) very close and then a full on blast of the horn sts them up a bit.

muley

1,453 posts

282 months

Monday 19th March 2012
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Superb

10/10 go to the top of the class

Typhon

525 posts

235 months

Monday 19th March 2012
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It seems like painting lines to indicate seperate lanes would benefit these roundabouts

toon10

6,224 posts

158 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
This is the sort of rant my boss uses. Diagrams, arrows, lots of swearing and generally accusing everyone of being an idiot. Love it.

Cupramax

10,485 posts

253 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
Typhon said:
It seems like painting lines to indicate seperate lanes would benefit these roundabouts
Nope, all our local ones have been "laned". It just makes it ten times worse with retards that never get in the right lane or cut you up at the very last second or even worse just stop in the middle of the roundabout when the lane they want isn't moving shootbanghead

5lab

1,666 posts

197 months

Monday 19th March 2012
quotequote all
inrats.