Best smoker barges 1-5 large [vol11]

[louiebaby]

Been playing catch up...

Love the Alfa, shame it's not a conservatory model, but very nice any way.

For the chap with the fuel pump problem before a long trip, I feel your pain. I have my local independent looking at a seizing caliper for me, if they can't squeeze it in and sort it I've got to take the wife and kids from Exeter to Nottingham for the weekend in a Clio. (The humanity, etc etc...)

[sam303]

JZZ30 said:

Caveat: I have no experience of 'the market' website, nor what this is worth (probably over thread limit), but I'll post it anyway

https://themarket.co.uk/listings/bmw/760li/3a0a24c...

Loving the write-up on that 760iL. It rather reads like the author on the Market website is a thread veteran...

[MorganP104]

vournikas said:

Not bad for a bag 'n a half:-

530i

Oooh, a tidy looking E39 wagon, rolling on choice wheels! Then I see it's a 3 litre straight-six. I start twitching excitedly.

Then I spot the manual gearbox. She's starting to look like a TOWIE cast member falling out of an Essex nightclub at 4am. Further investigation reveals the cloth interior. Now I'm thinking Leslie Ash's botched botox job. It gets worse - aftermarket stereo, with plastic surround awkwardly covering the rest of the hole. The full Susan Boyle.

And for those reasons, I'm out.

[louiebaby]

MorganP104 said:

vournikas said:

Not bad for a bag 'n a half:-

530i

Oooh, a tidy looking E39 wagon, rolling on choice wheels! Then I see it's a 3 litre straight-six. I start twitching excitedly. Then I spot the manual gearbox. She's starting to look like a TOWIE cast member falling out of an Essex nightclub at 4am.

Further investigation reveals the cloth interior. Now I'm thinking Leslie Ash's botched botox job. It gets worse - aftermarket stereo, with plastic surround awkwardly covering the rest of the hole. The full Susan Boyle.

And for those reasons, I'm out.

If they put a PH advert up, I reckon they would use that for Shed of the Week.

The cloth wouldn't put me off. The stereo is bad, but those Chinese versions of the fullscreen Sat Nav are only £170:

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/272458513636

Also, it's less than £1500. It's worth it.

(Not that I fancy Susan Boyle. Obviously.)

[MorganP104]

louiebaby said:

MorganP104 said:

vournikas said:

Not bad for a bag 'n a half:-

530i

Oooh, a tidy looking E39 wagon, rolling on choice wheels! Then I see it's a 3 litre straight-six. I start twitching excitedly. Then I spot the manual gearbox. She's starting to look like a TOWIE cast member falling out of an Essex nightclub at 4am.

Further investigation reveals the cloth interior. Now I'm thinking Leslie Ash's botched botox job. It gets worse - aftermarket stereo, with plastic surround awkwardly covering the rest of the hole. The full Susan Boyle.

And for those reasons, I'm out.

If they put a PH advert up, I reckon they would use that for Shed of the Week.

The cloth wouldn't put me off. The stereo is bad, but how much is one of those Chinese versions of the fullscreen Sat Nav?

Also, it's less than £1500. It's worth it.

(Not that I fancy Susan Boyle. Obviously.)

Of course you don't. You just prefer cloth seats in old barges. That's MUCH worse!

[ElectricSoup]

BigBen said:

Mark-C said:

TheLordJohn said:

BigBen said:

Then why do you see so many more S-classes than C1s in central London

A few weeks ago I was out in my barge and fell in behind a horsebox. If I was in a C1 I could still be behind that horsebox two weeks later.....

There is nothing more tragic than seeing a man in a little first-time-driver motor.
My BMW was only £1500, but it's a 3.0 straight six, has cruise control and full leather and is comfortable and quiet. It's a 2002, has 141k and has nothing wrong with it (aside from bodywork).

I honestly don't understand how people happily drive such st motors, even if they are new/newer. Little rattle boxes that couldn't pull the skin off a rice pudding. Not for me, thanks.

You do realise it's possible to have more than one car? And that sometimes different cars are good at different things? I used to run an Octavia Estate alongside the Jag but now that skip runs and dog hauling are a thing of the past I have a Ka - it's rather good fun and I really don't care if I apparently look "tragic"

I run a Nissan Leaf alongside my barge, previously a Renault Zoe. Barge + EV is a winning formula.

Hello brother. Nissan Leaf plus pre-facelift 2005 Merc W(S)211 E320 CDI estate here.

[Patrick Bateman]

MorganP104 said:

Oooh, a tidy looking E39 wagon, rolling on choice wheels! Then I see it's a 3 litre straight-six. I start twitching excitedly.

Then I spot the manual gearbox. She's starting to look like a TOWIE cast member falling out of an Essex nightclub at 4am. Further investigation reveals the cloth interior. Now I'm thinking Leslie Ash's botched botox job. It gets worse - aftermarket stereo, with plastic surround awkwardly covering the rest of the hole. The full Susan Boyle.

And for those reasons, I'm out.

Given the price, an easily changeable stereo isn't exactly the stuff of nightmares.

[MorganP104]

Patrick Bateman said:

MorganP104 said:

Oooh, a tidy looking E39 wagon, rolling on choice wheels! Then I see it's a 3 litre straight-six. I start twitching excitedly.

Then I spot the manual gearbox. She's starting to look like a TOWIE cast member falling out of an Essex nightclub at 4am. Further investigation reveals the cloth interior. Now I'm thinking Leslie Ash's botched botox job. It gets worse - aftermarket stereo, with plastic surround awkwardly covering the rest of the hole. The full Susan Boyle.

And for those reasons, I'm out.

Given the price, an easily changeable stereo isn't exactly the stuff of nightmares.

It's more the manual gearbox and cloth seats that have done it for me. A bit like a 4-pot in a BMW (sainted E30 M3 aside)... Just doesn't sit well with me.

[Krikkit]

I suppose the crux of it is whether an E39 T-SE is the kind of car which feels natural being hustled, or whether it's a cruiser...

My W211 is a very capable car when pushed, keeping its composure etc, but it has a feel of a disapproving nanny behind it all, quietly raising an eyebrow of discouragement. I think a manual box would ruin it.

Cloth seats though, pass. Velour maybe, but poverty cloth like that is nasty.

[TheLordJohn]

Krikkit said:

All subject to more full-beard correction, but I believe:

Engine + box nothing to worry on as long as they've been serviced.
Suspension may be tricky (ABC), make sure it goes up+down etc as appropriate, but it's a bit of a lottery.
Watch out for corrosion on the rear 3/4 panel, I believe it's a mix of Alu and Steel? I found a site with the full bodyshell breakdown ages ago, but I can't find it now.


Otherwise I think it's the usual electrickery precaution as ever when buying a 15+ year old car. I really fancy one some day, handsome cars.

Found it! http://bayhas.com/mercedes/cl215/contents/body_gen...

Edited by Krikkit on Thursday 28th September 10:11

Thanks very much for the responses.
I sort of knew it was something to do with the suspension that would be the costly bit as i've read it on this very forum.
It's the best one I can afford, while still getting a decent chunk of cash my way for my 996.

J4CKO said:

Engine and box is tough, its the ABC suspension that generates the heartache and expense, not averse to rust and electrical issues, it is nearly 18 years old. I wouldnt say dont but buy a good one as cheap as you can get it, be as hands on as you can and be ready to bail on it, the later C216 model is available from 10 grand now and that doesnt have ABC, just airmatic which has potential for agro but is generally simpler and cheaper to keep in good order.

Thanks It seems I hover around the late 90's to very early 00s for most of my 'every day' car purchases.

[BigBen]

ElectricSoup said:

Hello brother. Nissan Leaf plus pre-facelift 2005 Merc W(S)211 E320 CDI estate here.

Also have an S211 E320 in the fleet, albeit a 2004.

[Bargista]

[quote=Krikkit]I suppose the crux of it is whether an E39 T-SE is the kind of car which feels natural being hustled, or whether it's a cruiser...


My auto 540i touring is a non sport model but with sport suspension (and comfort seats) and it's equally at home wafting or being hustled. I'm sure the V8 helps with the willingness to hustle.nonetheless, the hustling still feels somewhat refined!


And it also has the best looking wheels ever seen on an E39!

[iSore]

There is no excuse for silver grey cloth trim. Apart from minging of poverty, two months hard use and it looks like a piss stained map of Africa. Black leather all the way.

[cat220]

This v70 t5 looks good, manual too, £1100...
https://www.volvoforums.org.uk/showthread.php?t=27...

[Krikkit]

Lovely machine, such a bargain at barely over a bag.

[JF87]

Uber-value! I ran a non-T one of those for years - without wishing to upset core thread values, it seemed a huge upgrade on the S124 it replaced.

[nosuchuser]

Bargista]rikkit said:

I suppose the crux of it is whether an E39 T-SE is the kind of car which feels natural being hustled, or whether it's a cruiser...


My auto 540i touring is a non sport model but with sport suspension (and comfort seats) and it's equally at home wafting or being hustled. I'm sure the V8 helps with the willingness to hustle.nonetheless, the hustling still feels somewhat refined!


And it also has the best looking wheels ever seen on an E39!

Description says 15" wheels. I wouldn't put it past the dealer to have had those tasty ones off and on the 'bay separately

[ian316]

iSore said:

There is no excuse for silver grey cloth trim. Apart from minging of poverty, two months hard use and it looks like a piss stained map of Africa. Black leather all the way.

FFS that's funny

[Lowtimer]

Krikkit said:

I suppose the crux of it is whether an E39 T-SE is the kind of car which feels natural being hustled, or whether it's a cruiser...

My W211 is a very capable car when pushed, keeping its composure etc, but it has a feel of a disapproving nanny behind it all, quietly raising an eyebrow of discouragement. I think a manual box would ruin it.

Cloth seats though, pass. Velour maybe, but poverty cloth like that is nasty.

Mine is a perfectly lovely cruiser (manual 530i SE) and hustles when I want it to. For a not terribly unseemly level of hustle, of course, I have other cars for that: it's not a car you want sideways. But I can guarantee it never holds up anyone in a modern equivalent.

All this presupposes of course, as with ay seriously old car, that you've bothered to refresh the suspension properly. Most people who have come to the non-M5 E39 in the last five years or so have never driven one that is anything like it should be, because most people don;t see a need to maintain their cars properly. But give the thing some respect for its age, swap out all the rubber, put fresh dampers on it and make the wheels point in the right directions and put decent tyres on it and you find, as Autocar did on their original 528i SE road test:
"This is a car that remains in a league above its competitors for pure response and driver involvement: it possesses the most complete saloon chassis we've ever tested ... BMW has been doing things so right for so long it was almost inevitable that one day it would come up with a near-perfect car"

And, yeah, having had both, the Touring drives almost identically to the saloon for given loadings. In some ways better as it has a self-levelling rear end so when you do put stuff in the back it maintains the proper ride height.

What it doesn't do is feel like a new 320D on 18" runflats. It's a very different style of drive. It's about pand cushioning rather than dartiness. It reaches down into the undulations of the road and brings balance and flow, rather than pattering and jittering and leaping from crag to crag. The standard 225/55 R16 tyres are perfect for the car. Driven properly it covers the ground at speed without ever looking or feeling as if it is trying hard. The capabilities are there if you look for them. And you get proper steering too.

Edited by Lowtimer on Thursday 28th September 16:52

Edited by Lowtimer on Thursday 28th September 17:03

[dai1983]

Krikkit said:

Lovely machine, such a bargain at barely over a bag.

Its on Scumtree too if anyone wants to see more:

https://www.gumtree.com/p/volvo/volvo-v70-2.3-t5-s...

What sort of motorway MPG would one of those see?