Best smoker barges 1-5 large [Vol 12]

[BrabusMog]

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

[Stegel]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Stegel said:

93DW said:

mondayo said:

Speaking of dodgy panels...the tatty green E500 estate is back on the bay
https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2...

The thing that made me chucke about the ad was this quote "We are an online auction company, with some key differences to public auction sites like British Car Auctions"

The pictures are taken at BCA! Looks like its come from we buy any car so thats certainly something to be aware of

In fairness to the trader, they’re a low margin operator that picks up stuff at main auctions and punts it on via eBay. They have a clear “no like, no buy” policy. This is the green E class’s at least third time round on eBay - whether it has a real major issue on inspection or is simply being bid on by dreamers who wake up when they sit in it is impossible to say. I’d imagine plugging in a reader could be essential.

I'd be happy to take a punt on that if I could get it reasonably close-ish to the money it's at now. Certainly at sub-2 it's appealing.

Decent spec, sensible miles, decent colour. I haven't looked at the MOT history, natch, but barring any test-drive concerns I'd risk it. Get my local paint shop to smarten it up a bit, give it a service, and then see how I got on. The temptation would inevitably be to 'invest' in it, but I reckon that would make a decent and honest motor.

ETA - wonder what it went for before?

MOT history is ok, and the tyres visible are Michelins, so it may well have been looked after. Last time (which I don’t think was its first round on eBay) it approached £4K. I certainly don’t need it, but I’d consider it at below £2.5k.

[93DW]

Stegel said:

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Stegel said:

93DW said:

mondayo said:

Speaking of dodgy panels...the tatty green E500 estate is back on the bay
https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2...

The thing that made me chucke about the ad was this quote "We are an online auction company, with some key differences to public auction sites like British Car Auctions"

The pictures are taken at BCA! Looks like its come from we buy any car so thats certainly something to be aware of

In fairness to the trader, they’re a low margin operator that picks up stuff at main auctions and punts it on via eBay. They have a clear “no like, no buy” policy. This is the green E class’s at least third time round on eBay - whether it has a real major issue on inspection or is simply being bid on by dreamers who wake up when they sit in it is impossible to say. I’d imagine plugging in a reader could be essential.

I'd be happy to take a punt on that if I could get it reasonably close-ish to the money it's at now. Certainly at sub-2 it's appealing.

Decent spec, sensible miles, decent colour. I haven't looked at the MOT history, natch, but barring any test-drive concerns I'd risk it. Get my local paint shop to smarten it up a bit, give it a service, and then see how I got on. The temptation would inevitably be to 'invest' in it, but I reckon that would make a decent and honest motor.

ETA - wonder what it went for before?

MOT history is ok, and the tyres visible are Michelins, so it may well have been looked after. Last time (which I don’t think was its first round on eBay) it approached £4K. I certainly don’t need it, but I’d consider it at below £2.5k.

Surely theres a reason the last owner has sold it to We Buy Any Car rather than selling it themselves or even PX'ing it. The WBAC figure for it today is £2k and thats without inputting the damage or before they knock down the price. If they paid anymore than £1k for it i'd be surprised. Also the WBAC reps are not allowed to drive the cars other than rolling them back and forth to check they go into gear and actually move, they then get picked up by lorry and taken to BCA where there is a 10mph speed limit so theres every chance there could be a whole host of engine/gearbox problems that become apparent once its up to road speeds.

[Prinny]

From browsing around the auction site from M. dG’s post on the 5-10 thread...

https://mathewsons.co.uk/vehicle-auction-catalogue...

MOT history suggests a brake expenditure in the near future, but apart from that, would seem good, for bottom end of budget. OK, it’s neither automatic or particularly blessed with special engine, but it gets a bye on those point as it’s a Subaru.

[r129sl]

93DW said:

Stegel said:

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Stegel said:

93DW said:

mondayo said:

Speaking of dodgy panels...the tatty green E500 estate is back on the bay
https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2...

The thing that made me chucke about the ad was this quote "We are an online auction company, with some key differences to public auction sites like British Car Auctions"

The pictures are taken at BCA! Looks like its come from we buy any car so thats certainly something to be aware of

In fairness to the trader, they’re a low margin operator that picks up stuff at main auctions and punts it on via eBay. They have a clear “no like, no buy” policy. This is the green E class’s at least third time round on eBay - whether it has a real major issue on inspection or is simply being bid on by dreamers who wake up when they sit in it is impossible to say. I’d imagine plugging in a reader could be essential.

I'd be happy to take a punt on that if I could get it reasonably close-ish to the money it's at now. Certainly at sub-2 it's appealing.

Decent spec, sensible miles, decent colour. I haven't looked at the MOT history, natch, but barring any test-drive concerns I'd risk it. Get my local paint shop to smarten it up a bit, give it a service, and then see how I got on. The temptation would inevitably be to 'invest' in it, but I reckon that would make a decent and honest motor.

ETA - wonder what it went for before?

MOT history is ok, and the tyres visible are Michelins, so it may well have been looked after. Last time (which I don’t think was its first round on eBay) it approached £4K. I certainly don’t need it, but I’d consider it at below £2.5k.

Surely theres a reason the last owner has sold it to We Buy Any Car rather than selling it themselves or even PX'ing it. The WBAC figure for it today is £2k and thats without inputting the damage or before they knock down the price. If they paid anymore than £1k for it i'd be surprised. Also the WBAC reps are not allowed to drive the cars other than rolling them back and forth to check they go into gear and actually move, they then get picked up by lorry and taken to BCA where there is a 10mph speed limit so theres every chance there could be a whole host of engine/gearbox problems that become apparent once its up to road speeds.

I am quite tempted by that but only at bargain money: sub-£2k. Let's face it, it needs £2k on the paintwork. My optimistic nature, combined with the observations above about MOT history and tyres, suggest it's a car that has had a bad couple of scrapes on a narrow entrance way and has been offloaded when the owner was finished with it. I'd be highly surprised if there is anything wrong with the engine and transmission: they just don't go wrong like that.

This E500 Elegance saloon may appeal here. Heated nappa leather upholstery. https://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/201...





On the question of whether the E430 makes a good barge, with the familiar caveat about rot, I would say it is the consummate barge. I drove mine down to Manchester late the other night and it was perfect: very refined, very fast (I managed to average bang on 80mph door to door, which takes some doing), very comfortable, very easy to operate.

[MorganP104]

BrabusMog said:

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

Too kind.

This was me, reading the advert for that E38 750i:

[ian316]

MorganP104 said:

BrabusMog said:

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

Too kind.

This was me, reading the advert for that E38 750i:

That's my wife's face when i'm on autotrader

[tobinen]

r129sl said:

I managed to average bang on 80mph door to door, which takes some doing.

Blimey! That does indeed take some doing. Impressive and way above my comfort zone.

[r129sl]

tobinen said:

r129sl said:

I managed to average bang on 80mph door to door, which takes some doing.

Blimey! That does indeed take some doing. Impressive and way above my comfort zone.

Didn't go above the ton.

But didn't go under the ton much, either, hence my disappointment.

[Prinny]

r129sl said:

I am quite tempted by that but only at bargain money: sub-£2k

Agreed - at that price it’s a good buy - I think. I’d be tempted to leave the marks, it’s got a certain “no fks given” appearance that could make it useful in the thrust & edge of a commute into the smoke. It’s got the performance to go for the gaps, and the minicab boys will see the scars... Luckily, I have no such commute, and therefore can’t justify it.

r129sl said:

This E500 Elegance saloon may appeal here. Heated nappa leather upholstery.

Why do people do this? Does the seller really think that throwing an additional floormat in at a jaunty angle to cover the hole in the original one will help it sell?

Aargh I’d rather see no mat, or a worn mat, not a blatant cover-up! It instantly twitches my ‘smart’ radar. (As in “will willfully obfuscate or decieve if they feel the average billy bunter won’t see it”).

[J4CKO]

ian316 said:

MorganP104 said:

BrabusMog said:

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

Too kind.

This was me, reading the advert for that E38 750i:

That's my wife's face when i'm on autotrader

Is that during Sexytime ?

[Prinny]

J4CKO said:

ian316 said:

MorganP104 said:

BrabusMog said:

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

Too kind.

This was me, reading the advert for that E38 750i:

That's my wife's face when i'm on autotrader

Is that during Sexytime ?

(obviously).

[ian316]

Prinny said:

J4CKO said:

ian316 said:

MorganP104 said:

BrabusMog said:

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

One of the best things I've read on PH

Too kind.

This was me, reading the advert for that E38 750i:

That's my wife's face when i'm on autotrader

Is that during Sexytime ?

(obviously).

sexytime whats that lol

[TobyLerone]

MorganP104 said:

I like an E38, but I wouldn't touch that with a Guinness Book of Records-sized bargepole. Electronics/ECU/electrics/wiring loom/various sensors (take your pick) will be toast. No, no, and thrice no.

My knee jerk reaction was to think that you had linked the gorgeous 750 for sale at the Old Colonel. I was thinking "but that seemed bloody lovely!". Genuinely trying to not-buy it. Bork factor 10,000, perhaps. But it's bloody lovely to my eyes.

After reading the advert and clicking the link (I'd seen it before), chav wheels, distasteful chrome, electrical issues... I'll pass. Unless it was considerably sub-£1k. In which case, the gamble begins!

But ~£2k is a bit rich for a moon mileage box of electronics problems, and potentially the engine / gearbox going bang, rust (do these suffer from tin-worm or not?), and the magic smoke coming out of the ECU's... Good luck to the punter who drives it away!

[V8mate]

ian316 said:

sexytime whats that lol

Well, if means my wife will grow a beard, I'm not interested.

[Prinny]

If you’re going for a 7 that’ll give heartbreak & guaranteed misery, my money’s on this one...

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Offers-Engine-Failure-2...

I’m guessing it’s been sat for a ‘short while’...

[Geekman]

Prinny said:

If you’re going for a 7 that’ll give heartbreak & guaranteed misery, my money’s on this one...

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Offers-Engine-Failure-2...

I’m guessing it’s been sat for a ‘short while’...

Prime candidate for shipping to Eastern Europe: many German barges with serious faults are bought in bulk by people who put them on transporters, take advantage of the vastly cheaper labour rates to get them fixed up, then sell them on for a much higher price than they'd fetch in the UK.

[wd888]

Prinny said:

Why do people do this? Does the seller really think that throwing an additional floormat in at a jaunty angle to cover the hole in the original one will help it sell?

Aargh I’d rather see no mat, or a worn mat, not a blatant cover-up! It instantly twitches my ‘smart’ radar. (As in “will willfully obfuscate or decieve if they feel the average billy bunter won’t see it”).

as this price point it doesn't really matter.

[nobrakes]

I don’t think we’ve had an A8 for a while;

2005 4.2 A8

Sensible dark blue and a very plain interior, but only on 17s and it’s the LWB. It must be a lovely smooth drive.

Being a 4.2 petrol, not likely to have been a taxi either.

https://www.autotrader.co.uk/classified/advert/201...

They just seem like such an accomplished car.

(Oops, add says it’s on 18s. There was another similar on 17s).

Edited by nobrakes on Saturday 20th January 19:06

Edited by nobrakes on Sunday 21st January 01:23

[0a]

Very nice, and they make lots of sense in this miserable weather. Do these later ones still have gearbox issues?