Best smoker barges 1-5 large [Vol 18]
Discussion
Dapster said:
Flat roofed pub majesty awaits you here. Strange MOT history - no mileage for a few years, then 1 year of 14,000 miles, then nothing for a few more years.
Barge royalty indeed. If you parked that next to your diesel Insignia then you would be forgiven all transgressions. I'd love to buy something like that and shed-it. I'd buy some pinstriped shirts with white collars and cuffs - or borrow some from bolidemichael - and smoke around with my arm out the window, not giving a f
k about anyone. A stately 50 mph everywhere, including outside schools, and topping up 30 quids worth of fuel at a time on an as-needed basis so I didn't have too much invested in case of failure. I could out-Council Council. Marvelous.
bolidemichael said:
Barges must have the essence of being owned and driven by yesterday's captains of industry.
Yesterdays captains of Industry were driven though; far too busy to drive themselves. That pretty much limits it to a LWB XJ, S Class or 7 series for example or if they were old school a Rolls Royce. Lesser stuff like the 5 series or E class were for their lieutenants.Derventio said:
I disagree with the statement about the badge. A Senator, Carlton or Omega is usually well received on these pages. Perceived image may well be relevant factor.
Have you seen what happens when I post a Mondeo?!Older VX are acceptable, perhaps for some here a throwback to youth or days gone by. Newer stuff seems to be universally despised, certainly on wider PH, and they have had little to offer the bargeist for some time. I suppose.
CharlesdeGaulle said:
I'd love to buy something like that and shed-it. I'd buy some pinstriped shirts with white collars and cuffs - or borrow some from bolidemichael - and smoke around with my arm out the window, not giving a fk about anyone. A stately 50 mph everywhere, including outside schools, and topping up 30 quids worth of fuel at a time on an as-needed basis so I didn't have too much invested in case of failure.
What a fantastic image.k about anyone. A stately 50 mph everywhere, including outside schools, and topping up 30 quids worth of fuel at a time on an as-needed basis so I didn't have too much invested in case of failure. Wouldn't a set of red, or loudly patterned, braces be required to complete the look?
CharlesdeGaulle said:
Dapster said:
Flat roofed pub majesty awaits you here. Strange MOT history - no mileage for a few years, then 1 year of 14,000 miles, then nothing for a few more years.
Barge royalty indeed. If you parked that next to your diesel Insignia then you would be forgiven all transgressions. I'd love to buy something like that and shed-it. I'd buy some pinstriped shirts with white collars and cuffs - or borrow some from bolidemichael - and smoke around with my arm out the window, not giving a f
k about anyone. A stately 50 mph everywhere, including outside schools, and topping up 30 quids worth of fuel at a time on an as-needed basis so I didn't have too much invested in case of failure. I could out-Council Council. Marvelous.
bolidemichael said:
21st Century Man said:
bolidemichael said:
Barges must have the essence of being owned and driven by yesterday's captains of industry.
And at the very top, chauffeur driven too (taxi fodder not included).
Derventio said:
bolidemichael said:
Barges must have the essence of being owned and driven by yesterday's captains of industry.
This is where a "like" button would be useful.I'd also like to point out that having to be filled from the black pump, does not necessarily preclude a car from barge membership. A W220 S320 Cdi fits in with thread mentality, as does a 300D or CLS 320. A BMW 5 or 7 series is usually well received on these pages and as long as it has six or more cylinders, nobody really minds if it is a heavy oiler. My CLK was definitely a barge and had that look back factor, despite being powered by a four cylinder diesel.
Sadly, as good as it is, A Skoda Superb is more likely to be the Taxi that a captain of industry orders, whilst his S500 is in for a service.
Derventio said:
I disagree with the statement about the badge. A Senator, Carlton or Omega is usually well received on these pages. Perceived image may well be relevant factor.
They are right wheel drive, the Insignia and Superb are not. Even the AWDs are just pretending. 
ETA:
21st Century Man said:
And at the very top, chauffeur driven too (taxi fodder not included).
But not Far Eastern, with the exception of a V12 Century, naturally.Edited by Sahjahd on Thursday 6th May 11:46
Sahjahd said:
Derventio said:
bolidemichael said:
Barges must have the essence of being owned and driven by yesterday's captains of industry.
I'd also like to point out that having to be filled from the black pump, does not necessarily preclude a car from barge membership.Front and rear massage comfort seats. Air suspension all round. Small wheels. Soft close doors. Leather dash. 4 pot diesel. Wait, what? So, forgetting the price for a second - barge or no?
Martin.
Sahjahd said:
Surely anything with a diesel engine can only be a taxi, a minicab or A commercial vehicle. No would be plutocrat wishes to show the world their inability to afford petrol or BIK tax.
They are right wheel drive, the Insignia and Superb are not. Even the AWDs are just pretending.
But not Far Eastern, with the exception of a V12 Century, naturally.
There are several issues with your statements:They are right wheel drive, the Insignia and Superb are not. Even the AWDs are just pretending.
But not Far Eastern, with the exception of a V12 Century, naturally.
Cars such as the Mercedes W124 300D, Audi A8 4.0/4.2 TDI, Phaeton 3.0 sit squarely within the bargist ethos. Many higher ups actively went for the diesel option on environmental grounds (however misguided) in recent years. Availability of straight petrol versions of the barges we all appreciate are becoming increasingly rare. I would argue, though, that any barge with a diesel engine must have at least 6 cylinders to be eligible for barge status....Damn. That means my CLK wasn't a barge. Oh well.
This thread isn't anti diesel, per se, just basic four cylinder tractor engines are not really refined enough for barge duties.
The "wrong wheel drive" mentality no longer works. Honda Legend, Toyota Camry, Rover 800 to name but a few are all front wheel drive but are considered barges.
I once again refer to the Honda Legend, Toyota Camry, Nissan QX, Nissan Cedric, Mazda 929 and of course any Lexus, GS and above are most definitely barges and far eastern.
Edited by Derventio on Thursday 6th May 12:22
Martin30 said:
Whilst idly browsing BMW approved used for 760s as one does, this little gem/aboration/outlier sprung out. I am using the nearly Friday rule liberally here, but I can see this being in thread within a couple of years due to the engine.
Front and rear massage comfort seats. Air suspension all round. Small wheels. Soft close doors. Leather dash. 4 pot diesel. Wait, what? So, forgetting the price for a second - barge or no?
Martin.
Land yacht with an outboard Front and rear massage comfort seats. Air suspension all round. Small wheels. Soft close doors. Leather dash. 4 pot diesel. Wait, what? So, forgetting the price for a second - barge or no?
Martin.
It must have been Friday afternoon seeing how they managed to put a 3 series engine in a 7.
Martin30 said:
Whilst idly browsing BMW approved used for 760s as one does, this little gem/aboration/outlier sprung out. I am using the nearly Friday rule liberally here, but I can see this being in thread within a couple of years due to the engine.
Front and rear massage comfort seats. Air suspension all round. Small wheels. Soft close doors. Leather dash. 4 pot diesel. Wait, what? So, forgetting the price for a second - barge or no?
Martin.
Franken-barge.Front and rear massage comfort seats. Air suspension all round. Small wheels. Soft close doors. Leather dash. 4 pot diesel. Wait, what? So, forgetting the price for a second - barge or no?
Martin.
bolidemichael said:
Barges must have the essence of being owned and driven by yesterday's captains of industry.
As an interesting aside, LVMH CEO Barnard Arnault (net worth £131bn) used to tootle around Paris between board meeting and mistress in a bullet proof 205. Could there be less of a barge than a delicate 205 with half a ton of armouring? 
https://www.topgear.com/car-news/who-doesnt-want-a...
BenB91 said:
There was a question over a dash light when it was last posted, pic 12 or 15? although I thought ot was something that could be turned off by the driver's right knee. Expect beard input in 3....2......Gassing Station | General Gassing | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff