RE: TVR Speed Six Design Spec Upgrade
Discussion
Podie said:
RUSSELLM said:
Dated April 16, 2004...
Happened accross another one of his "Press releases " the other day from 1998..... He was quoted as putting a bid in for Rolls Royce with the intention of making 2500 cars a year at over £200,000.
I'll post the link up tomorrow.... It's quite funny, but in a sad way
I've just noticed that another supplier using also offering a similar upgrade
The Bellend Machine company have announced details for their latest Warp Speed 6 645 bhp upgrade. The conversion includes the replacment of the cylinder head with the latest purest green. This new designs leaves the finger followers and position of the cam shafts exactly as they were, but additional of a pure green head will dramatically improve the colour. The modifications also include the addition of oil to the cylinder head for the first time on a Speed six. These modifications give more power as than originally designed. They also give a vast improvement in reliability as pure green is considerably greener.
Higher performance cylinder liners which give better heat transfer and less friction using micro fairy dust technology.
Pistons have been replaced by the heart of the Tardis.
Specially designed piston rings give the tardis a nice look.
Cam shafts have been replaced with specially designed pneumatic valves with no springs giving quicker engine response enabling 16,000rpm +.
The return of a solid billet crank shaft with higher performance main bearing coated with Dilithium Crystals.
All Bellend rebuilt Speed 6 engines come with the following components replaced as standard and all original castings are thrown away for the hell of it,
New Mythical Crankshaft
Relinered and rebored cylinder block with deck remachined. Ideal for conversation in a top gear style coffee table
New Mythical Liners
Pistons replaced with heart of Tardis
New high specification piston rings
New forged W beam 4340 steel rods with ARP 3000 rod bolts
New main and big end bearings coated with low fricton fairy dust
Sump baffle panel is now longer required as this can be an oil free engine due to the low fricton nature of fairy dust coating
Cylinder head completely remachined from purest green and rebuilt with new pneumatic valves
Guides fitted and seats left as they were - you'll never know the difference.
Old inlet valves
Old exhaust valves
New valve stem seals
New Chocolate finger followers
Camshafts removed and sold on fleebay
Reuse of existing headgasket - it'll save a few quid for the pub
Oil feed modification to cylinder head (crap design but it's there some oil there somewhere)
New high specification timing chains from halford's bike department. Include link extractor and spare links
Half time bearings that work using the toothed cog approach found on a halford bike derailleur
New Dilithium Crystals impregnated upper timing chain tensioner.
Old oil seals resealed with silicon (white its cheaper than black, but black available for an extra charge unless purchased by a OAP on Wednesday at B&Q)
All bhp are genuine Engine Dyno figures from my imagination and not estimated Rolling Road figures
The Warp Speed 6 Engine is a result of no going development by myself
5.4 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus Vat
6.5 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus an extra 50%. I'll pay the vat if you order before Friday.
Engine include no warranty what so every. Cash upfront, no card payments but will consider 110 million euro's for design rights.
Engine removal and refit - Do you really what me to fit this thing?
For furher details please contact 0800 THERES ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE
The Bellend Machine company have announced details for their latest Warp Speed 6 645 bhp upgrade. The conversion includes the replacment of the cylinder head with the latest purest green. This new designs leaves the finger followers and position of the cam shafts exactly as they were, but additional of a pure green head will dramatically improve the colour. The modifications also include the addition of oil to the cylinder head for the first time on a Speed six. These modifications give more power as than originally designed. They also give a vast improvement in reliability as pure green is considerably greener.
Higher performance cylinder liners which give better heat transfer and less friction using micro fairy dust technology.
Pistons have been replaced by the heart of the Tardis.
Specially designed piston rings give the tardis a nice look.
Cam shafts have been replaced with specially designed pneumatic valves with no springs giving quicker engine response enabling 16,000rpm +.
The return of a solid billet crank shaft with higher performance main bearing coated with Dilithium Crystals.
All Bellend rebuilt Speed 6 engines come with the following components replaced as standard and all original castings are thrown away for the hell of it,
New Mythical Crankshaft
Relinered and rebored cylinder block with deck remachined. Ideal for conversation in a top gear style coffee table
New Mythical Liners
Pistons replaced with heart of Tardis
New high specification piston rings
New forged W beam 4340 steel rods with ARP 3000 rod bolts
New main and big end bearings coated with low fricton fairy dust
Sump baffle panel is now longer required as this can be an oil free engine due to the low fricton nature of fairy dust coating
Cylinder head completely remachined from purest green and rebuilt with new pneumatic valves
Guides fitted and seats left as they were - you'll never know the difference.
Old inlet valves
Old exhaust valves
New valve stem seals
New Chocolate finger followers
Camshafts removed and sold on fleebay
Reuse of existing headgasket - it'll save a few quid for the pub
Oil feed modification to cylinder head (crap design but it's there some oil there somewhere)
New high specification timing chains from halford's bike department. Include link extractor and spare links
Half time bearings that work using the toothed cog approach found on a halford bike derailleur
New Dilithium Crystals impregnated upper timing chain tensioner.
Old oil seals resealed with silicon (white its cheaper than black, but black available for an extra charge unless purchased by a OAP on Wednesday at B&Q)
All bhp are genuine Engine Dyno figures from my imagination and not estimated Rolling Road figures
The Warp Speed 6 Engine is a result of no going development by myself
5.4 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus Vat
6.5 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus an extra 50%. I'll pay the vat if you order before Friday.
Engine include no warranty what so every. Cash upfront, no card payments but will consider 110 million euro's for design rights.
Engine removal and refit - Do you really what me to fit this thing?
For furher details please contact 0800 THERES ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE
Edited by johnbear on Wednesday 13th May 20:39
johnbear said:
I've just noticed that another supplier using also offering a similar upgrade
The Bellend Machine company have announced details for their latest Warp Speed 6 645 bhp upgrade. The conversion includes the replacment of the cylinder head with the latest purest green. This new designs leaves the finger followers and position of the cam shafts exactly as they were, but additional of a pure green head will dramatically improve the colour. The modifications also include the addition of oil to the cylinder head for the first time on a Speed six. These modifications give more power as than originally designed. They also give a vast improvement in reliability as pure green is considerably greener.
Higher performance cylinder liners which give better heat transfer and less friction using micro fairy dust technology.
Pistons have been replaced by the heart of the Tardis.
Specially designed piston rings give the tardis a nice look.
Cam shafts have been replaced with specially designed pneumatic valves with no springs giving quicker engine response enabling 16,000rpm +.
The return of a solid billet crank shaft with higher performance main bearing coated with Dilithium Crystals.
All Bellend rebuilt Speed 6 engines come with the following components replaced as standard and all original castings are thrown away for the hell of it,
New Mythical Crankshaft
Relinered and rebored cylinder block with deck remachined. Ideal for conversation in a top gear style coffee table
New Mythical Liners
Pistons replaced with heart of Tardis
New high specification piston rings
New forged W beam 4340 steel rods with ARP 3000 rod bolts
New main and big end bearings coated with low fricton fairy dust
Sump baffle panel is now longer required as this can be an oil free engine due to the low fricton nature of fairy dust coating
Cylinder head completely remachined from purest green and rebuilt with new pneumatic valves
Guides fitted and seats left as they were - you'll never know the difference.
Old inlet valves
Old exhaust valves
New valve stem seals
New Chocolate finger followers
Camshafts removed and sold on fleebay
Reuse of existing headgasket - it'll save a few quid for the pub
Oil feed modification to cylinder head (crap design but it's there some oil there somewhere)
New high specification timing chains from halford's bike department. Include link extractor and spare links
Half time bearings that work using the toothed cog approach found on a halford bike derailleur
New Dilithium Crystals impregnated upper timing chain tensioner.
Old oil seals resealed with silicon (white its cheaper than black, but black available for an extra charge unless purchased by a OAP on Wednesday at B&Q)
All bhp are genuine Engine Dyno figures from my imagination and not estimated Rolling Road figures
The Warp Speed 6 Engine is a result of no going development by myself
5.4 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus Vat
6.5 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus an extra 50%. I'll pay the vat if you order before Friday.
Engine include no warranty what so every. Cash upfront, no card payments but will consider 110 million euro's for design rights.
Engine removal and refit - Do you really what me to fit this thing?
For furher details please contact 0800 THERES ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE
John would you like to work for me as marketing director,ill build you an engine 4.7 and 3/4 ltrs with 799.5 bhp with 99 yrs unlimited mileage warranty The Bellend Machine company have announced details for their latest Warp Speed 6 645 bhp upgrade. The conversion includes the replacment of the cylinder head with the latest purest green. This new designs leaves the finger followers and position of the cam shafts exactly as they were, but additional of a pure green head will dramatically improve the colour. The modifications also include the addition of oil to the cylinder head for the first time on a Speed six. These modifications give more power as than originally designed. They also give a vast improvement in reliability as pure green is considerably greener.
Higher performance cylinder liners which give better heat transfer and less friction using micro fairy dust technology.
Pistons have been replaced by the heart of the Tardis.
Specially designed piston rings give the tardis a nice look.
Cam shafts have been replaced with specially designed pneumatic valves with no springs giving quicker engine response enabling 16,000rpm +.
The return of a solid billet crank shaft with higher performance main bearing coated with Dilithium Crystals.
All Bellend rebuilt Speed 6 engines come with the following components replaced as standard and all original castings are thrown away for the hell of it,
New Mythical Crankshaft
Relinered and rebored cylinder block with deck remachined. Ideal for conversation in a top gear style coffee table
New Mythical Liners
Pistons replaced with heart of Tardis
New high specification piston rings
New forged W beam 4340 steel rods with ARP 3000 rod bolts
New main and big end bearings coated with low fricton fairy dust
Sump baffle panel is now longer required as this can be an oil free engine due to the low fricton nature of fairy dust coating
Cylinder head completely remachined from purest green and rebuilt with new pneumatic valves
Guides fitted and seats left as they were - you'll never know the difference.
Old inlet valves
Old exhaust valves
New valve stem seals
New Chocolate finger followers
Camshafts removed and sold on fleebay
Reuse of existing headgasket - it'll save a few quid for the pub
Oil feed modification to cylinder head (crap design but it's there some oil there somewhere)
New high specification timing chains from halford's bike department. Include link extractor and spare links
Half time bearings that work using the toothed cog approach found on a halford bike derailleur
New Dilithium Crystals impregnated upper timing chain tensioner.
Old oil seals resealed with silicon (white its cheaper than black, but black available for an extra charge unless purchased by a OAP on Wednesday at B&Q)
All bhp are genuine Engine Dyno figures from my imagination and not estimated Rolling Road figures
The Warp Speed 6 Engine is a result of no going development by myself
5.4 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus Vat
6.5 WARP SPEED 6 - I'll look at what driving and think of a figure plus an extra 50%. I'll pay the vat if you order before Friday.
Engine include no warranty what so every. Cash upfront, no card payments but will consider 110 million euro's for design rights.
Engine removal and refit - Do you really what me to fit this thing?
For furher details please contact 0800 THERES ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE
Edited by johnbear on Wednesday 13th May 20:39
think they call this virtual bhp
Dom
Harry Flashman said:
dvs_dave said:
baguaman said:
... the tuscan handling is crap until fixed..sorry tuscan owners..i love the car even though the handling is crap....if there is any logic in that kinda thinking. that level of power with that kinda handling...
mmm.. danger beckons..
mmm.. danger beckons..
996 Cabriolet and again 996 cab is a great handling car. Tuscan, frankly, is a bit hairy, but that's why you boys buy them. Not everyone's taset is everyone else's cup of tea.
I bought my Morgan instead of a Tuscan II Convertible because I preferred the dynamics - even though it is a considerably slower car (Tuscan S I was with on a recent run kept up with me easily, and in the straights, overtook and simply disappeared).
My lowly BMW V8 ounds better than the Speed Six though
I've yet to hear of a high-mileage Tuscan that did not need, at the very least, an expensive 'refresh' of the engine. This isn't to be anti-TVR, simply that the engines, even the good ones, were always slightly fragile. The BMW engine in the Morgan, on the other hand, will just go and go.
dvs_dave said:
Harry Flashman said:
Tuscan S I was with on a recent run kept up with me easily, and in the straights, overtook and simply disappeared.
'Twas I sir. Hope you've since got your motor sorted 
Back on topic....
I love the idea of a 550 bhp Speed 6 but Mr Melling has some explaining and some proving to do if he want's any chance at saving his reputation (amongst online Joe Public at least).
Presuming a big part of this engine's power is that it won't have to comply with any sort of emissions regs as it's an aftermarket modification?
Hi chap! That was fun, until my car started stalling at idle. So much for the vaunted BMW reliability that morning - the TVRs ran fine, the Porsche and the Morgan had trouble!
It's fine - air mass flow meter, nothing more. Going to Morgan for service and fettling soon.
Longblackcoat - the only stuff that has gone wrong with my car have been BMW bits - the immobiliser and air mass flow meter!
Admittedly not expensive, easy fixes, and the engine is fundamentally strong, unstressed, with long service intervals. The Aero is actually a relatively low maintenance sports car. Same servicing costs as my old Porsche 968 - a bit less, in fact.
Admittedly not expensive, easy fixes, and the engine is fundamentally strong, unstressed, with long service intervals. The Aero is actually a relatively low maintenance sports car. Same servicing costs as my old Porsche 968 - a bit less, in fact.
Mark A S said:
John
Did you write that with or without the aid of alcohol??, if not, full respect
Your joking - my spelling is bad enough without the aid of a few ales. It had to be done. I did think of rebuilding SP6 as a diesel with Le Mans 24Hrs racing techno stuff.Did you write that with or without the aid of alcohol??, if not, full respect
Hey, those tanks of your are something else. Maybe Melling should move into model engines and work his way upto full size engines!
hahithestevieboy said:
Horse_Apple said:
Gridl0k said:
I don't get it. I use the phrase "New molybdenum disulphide impregnated upper timing chain tensioner" in everyday conversation all the time.
Only last week I was in Ann Summers getting one for the wife.Horse_Apple said:
hahithestevieboy said:
Horse_Apple said:
Gridl0k said:
I don't get it. I use the phrase "New molybdenum disulphide impregnated upper timing chain tensioner" in everyday conversation all the time.
Only last week I was in Ann Summers getting one for the wife.
hahithestevieboy said:
Horse_Apple said:
hahithestevieboy said:
Horse_Apple said:
Gridl0k said:
I don't get it. I use the phrase "New molybdenum disulphide impregnated upper timing chain tensioner" in everyday conversation all the time.
Only last week I was in Ann Summers getting one for the wife.Gassing Station | General Gassing | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff