Never trust a driver wearing a hat
Discussion
A mate of mine has a theory that all drivers who wear hats are dangerous and to be treated with caution. Having studied the headwear status of my fellow drivers recently, I think he might be on to something...
Given that age is such a vague indication of driving ability, perhaps your wardrobe could offer a new approach to insurance as it demonstrates your judgement in a way your age doesn't. What do you think - a revolution in road safety?
An exception is when a hat is worn for necessity - I have to wear one to stop my head freezing.
Given that age is such a vague indication of driving ability, perhaps your wardrobe could offer a new approach to insurance as it demonstrates your judgement in a way your age doesn't. What do you think - a revolution in road safety?
An exception is when a hat is worn for necessity - I have to wear one to stop my head freezing.
You know something, you may be right.
Lets examine the different types of bonce adornment and their impact on the owner's driving ability.
Let me start with the Baseball Cap.
This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
The car thief is dangerous because he has actually nicked a car and is trying to escape the 'Five Oh', or he is driving his mum's tat draped 1.2 shopping trolley like he has stolen it to impress the 14 year old mother of two in the passenger seat.
The BSC is equally dangerous because he is trying to regain some of his youth and long lost sex appeal in a predictably unsuitable car. Usually seen in a 30 year old soft top MG or, even worse, in an achingly youthful hot hatch, it is likely the BSC has made this purchase because of a recent emasculation through divorce or children, so he will be attempting to prove his recently departed masculinity and newly found lack of respect for the human race by driving like a
in an unfamiliar car.
These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
Lets examine the different types of bonce adornment and their impact on the owner's driving ability.
Let me start with the Baseball Cap.
This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
The car thief is dangerous because he has actually nicked a car and is trying to escape the 'Five Oh', or he is driving his mum's tat draped 1.2 shopping trolley like he has stolen it to impress the 14 year old mother of two in the passenger seat.
The BSC is equally dangerous because he is trying to regain some of his youth and long lost sex appeal in a predictably unsuitable car. Usually seen in a 30 year old soft top MG or, even worse, in an achingly youthful hot hatch, it is likely the BSC has made this purchase because of a recent emasculation through divorce or children, so he will be attempting to prove his recently departed masculinity and newly found lack of respect for the human race by driving like a
in an unfamiliar car.These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
Jasandjules said:
It's a policy I've used for years as well - the exception being the novelty hat wearer (such as santa hats at Christmas etc)
I suspect that will mean the driver is drunk and should also be avoided. See; it is a foolproof theory. Whoever came up with it should be given a medal. Or a ceremonial hat.
spandexx said:
Let me start with the Baseball Cap.
This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
...
These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
You forgot Pistonheads with convertibles, who risk a nasty case of sunburn otherwise. Mind you some folk might consider us dangerous too!This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
...
These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
GravelBen said:
spandexx said:
Let me start with the Baseball Cap.
This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
...
These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
You forgot Pistonheads with convertibles, who risk a nasty case of sunburn otherwise. Mind you some folk might consider us dangerous too!This will either be worn by a car thief (identifiable by the jaunty angle or the balancing act on the back of his depleted ape-like cranium), or by the Bald-Spot Concealer (BSC). Both of these types of driver are dangerous in their own right.
...
These are the only two types of people that wear a baseball cap. No exceptions (I think you will find it is science), and both are very dangerous indeed.
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