My monumentally moronic mega-miles 760Li purchase...

[RoverP6B]

among the cars Mark has lying around his yard is my defunct 540i Touring... going to have to get something done about that.

The 760's MoT expires on the 6th August, so it's going down to RL Motor Services at Plympton by or on that date. The 535i is now finished (other than bodywork) and RL actually presented me with a final bill over £500 under the original estimate, and it has passed its MoT with no advisories (and at no extra charge), so I am very pleased about that. Excellent customer service, can certainly recommend Rich Lakey and his chief mechanic Kev to any West Country BMW owners.

[RoverP6B]

Well, the Seven soldiers on, had a few minor niggles (including a failed parking brake actuator immobilising the car on the road, twice!) and that misfire still isn't entirely cured, but I'm pretty pleased with it. The 535i has been sat at Plympton since the autumn - its MoT has just expired so Kev and co are sorting that for me.

One annoyance with the 7 is that there's an exhaust heat shield hanging down under the car where it's caught a rock or something on the lane here - I wonder if it might be possible to wire in a controller for the rear air suspension to get it to lift? Converting the front to air (using L322 Range Rover parts?) could also be an option, I suppose, but doubtless much more expensive... the Seven is ideal for so much of what I do, but it's the last mile or so to the house where the Range Rover would be more suitable!

[RoverP6B]

In case anyone has looked this car up recently, and particularly if they have noticed it has neither tax nor MoT, this is not because the car no longer exists, but simply because Covid and an increasingly persistent misfire (which, ironically, failed to materialise the last time to ran) led me to cease using it. It is sat on my driveway with a flat battery and has locked me out - neither key barrel will turn, so it’s going to be necessary to find some other external means of putting a charge on it. The pressure has also leaked out of the rear air suspension through disuse. DVLA were utterly unhelpful when I attempted to SORN it, insisting it would all have to be done on paper by snail mail, even though I'd gone through the process online before with this and other cars. The old faithful 535i remains my daily, although it has recently started using coolant, and there’s an intermittent seatbelt/airbag warning light issue that causes problems with every MoT. Had to have a minor exhaust leak welded. 540i still untouched over three years on from its failure, unfortunately - hoping to change that soon - so getting back in my barnstorming barge is probably going to take a back seat to getting that back on the road. These things all take longer than one would hope, but both my non-runners (540 and 760) will see the road again.

[RoverP6B]

Can't get to the engine bay as the bonnet release is under the car. Don't want to try jacking a 2.2 ton car that's parked across a sloping gravel drive. Pretty sure there's an undertray preventing easy access to the starter and alternator. I've heard it said that people have charged these and similar cars via door mirror wiring, rear number plate lights etc, so will try these. It just hasn't been a priority lately.

[RoverP6B]

d_a_n1979 said:

AW10 said:

On some BMs you can open the door of a car with a flat battery by turning the key and lifting the door handle at the same time. Might need a few attempts to get the motions in sync though.

This ^^

My E65 had a battery drain issue until I unplugged the comfort access handles; the lock would allow me to open the boot & the drivers door to open the bonnet etc

Might need to spray the locks with some WD40 to clean any grime out first though and then turn the key as much as you can to 90º etc

Heard this one before, doesn't work, the lock barrels turn only a handful of degrees before hitting the deadlocks.

[RoverP6B]

AW10 said:

Owner's manual for a 2005 E65 downloaded from https://www.bmwsections.com/docs/7series/ sez:

If an electrical defect occurs, you can unlock or lock the driver's door with the key in the end positions of the door lock.

Insert the key in the luggage compartment lid's lock and turn it all the way to the right – the lid opens.

I'll guess the keys have rarely, if ever, been used in this mode so some lubrication might be required. In the case of the door lock the force required will be considerable as you're mechanically undoing the deadbolts. This all presupposes the locks and keys match!

Just went and tried this on my 2005 E53 X5 - turning the drivers door key clockwise did the trick.

Good luck.

Thanks. I'll wait for warmer weather and apply WD40. The key and barrels do match, I know that much.