dont feel like life has a purpose, help
Discussion
I would never commit suicide or anything like that but here is my situation.
Its probably a normal life but i just dont feel happy at all.
I have a good career in a medical field.
Im good looking albeit a bit skinny despite training hard.
I have anxiety with girls despite the ability to have a good laugh with them at work, but when it comes to dating/having sex my anxiety causes me to avoid dates and freak out. I have slept with 5 girls so i dont know what it is, only 1 of them was in a relationship the rest were one night stands.
I have a few friends, couple of close ones.
I go out drinking once a month because my friends dont go out much anymore (were 24)
Apart from that i go to the gym with the same friend 3-4 times a week and go with friends to the shops or something occasionaly or round a friends house to play xbox.
I dont have much money to take up many types of hobby really and i just feel depressed with life, ive split up from an ex recently, having a girlfriend made me a lot happier and i feel as though i cant be happy without a other half.
Im aware my life does not sound bad at all, but i really feel s
t and bored with everything. Help
Its probably a normal life but i just dont feel happy at all.
I have a good career in a medical field.
Im good looking albeit a bit skinny despite training hard.
I have anxiety with girls despite the ability to have a good laugh with them at work, but when it comes to dating/having sex my anxiety causes me to avoid dates and freak out. I have slept with 5 girls so i dont know what it is, only 1 of them was in a relationship the rest were one night stands.
I have a few friends, couple of close ones.
I go out drinking once a month because my friends dont go out much anymore (were 24)
Apart from that i go to the gym with the same friend 3-4 times a week and go with friends to the shops or something occasionaly or round a friends house to play xbox.
I dont have much money to take up many types of hobby really and i just feel depressed with life, ive split up from an ex recently, having a girlfriend made me a lot happier and i feel as though i cant be happy without a other half.
Im aware my life does not sound bad at all, but i really feel s
t and bored with everything. HelpJamie, I just clicked on your profile and looked at your posts in the last 30 days, you've started a lot of topics in a lot of wrong places! 
Most people feel like you do at some point in their lives, do whatever makes you happy and don't worry too much about women... first you should try to be happy with yourself, make friendships, live life to the full. Everything else should follow...
Most people feel like you do at some point in their lives, do whatever makes you happy and don't worry too much about women... first you should try to be happy with yourself, make friendships, live life to the full. Everything else should follow...
-Pete- said:
Jamie, I just clicked on your profile and looked at your posts in the last 30 days, you've started a lot of topics in a lot of wrong places!
Most people feel like you do at some point in their lives, do whatever makes you happy and don't worry too much about women... first you should try to be happy with yourself, make friendships, live life to the full. Everything else should follow...
This is what i mean, i just dont feel like life is exciting as people seem to be with it, i feel low as hell for no reason really.Most people feel like you do at some point in their lives, do whatever makes you happy and don't worry too much about women... first you should try to be happy with yourself, make friendships, live life to the full. Everything else should follow...
There's always someone far worse off. Be thankful for the health and people that you have.
I think I'm right in saying you've just bought a house? If you hadn't I would've advised going travelling. Maybe a summer holiday at some back packer type places would sort you out? You don't have to feel nervous when everyone is in the same boat and doesn't know anyone.
Do you feel trapped and like life is mapped out for you? That might bring you down. Running out in the fresh air is good for lifting my mood, I don't bother with the gym anymore as a result.
I didn't knuckle down with a proper career until September last year- spent 5/6 years doing (badly paid) jobs that I loved and spending all my money on random trips around the world and old VWs. I was happy then and I'm even happier now- 2 years down the line I will have a place of my own and hopefully a family but all in good time.
Enjoy your youth and health while you can- think what makes you happy and go for it. Better than having regrets and you might meet that special someone.
I think I'm right in saying you've just bought a house? If you hadn't I would've advised going travelling. Maybe a summer holiday at some back packer type places would sort you out? You don't have to feel nervous when everyone is in the same boat and doesn't know anyone.
Do you feel trapped and like life is mapped out for you? That might bring you down. Running out in the fresh air is good for lifting my mood, I don't bother with the gym anymore as a result.
I didn't knuckle down with a proper career until September last year- spent 5/6 years doing (badly paid) jobs that I loved and spending all my money on random trips around the world and old VWs. I was happy then and I'm even happier now- 2 years down the line I will have a place of my own and hopefully a family but all in good time.
Enjoy your youth and health while you can- think what makes you happy and go for it. Better than having regrets and you might meet that special someone.
If relationship/social anxiety is really troubling you, why not consider something like CBT?
Other things that can provide a lift include making sure you get enough vit D3/sunglight and enough sleep, taking up volunteering, sports/exercise and/or mindfulness/meditation, and cutting back on sugar/alcohol.
These might sound like pat answers but I promise you I speak from experience.
Other things that can provide a lift include making sure you get enough vit D3/sunglight and enough sleep, taking up volunteering, sports/exercise and/or mindfulness/meditation, and cutting back on sugar/alcohol.
These might sound like pat answers but I promise you I speak from experience.
Challenge yourself to achieve something new. Doesn't have to cost the earth either, I'm currently working towards my first 5k run, then intend to do a duathlon and ultimately triathlons. This gives me something to aim for, even better if you can get someone else or a group involved, trust me being outside helps a lot, xbox marathons don't. Also start putting a few quid aside each week so you can do things on a whim when the chance arises, trips away, comedy gigs whatever you like, embrace new things and say yes more often. Get out there and live it man no-one will make it happen for you, you need to grab it for yourself. All the best mate I've been where you are, trust me it can get better but you need to fight to make it happen.
Life is generally st, with intermittent good bits. It may (will) sound trite but try and learn to appreciate the great stuff which is all around you.
When I moved to Leicester in October 2010 I had started a job I hated immediately and knew nobody in a town many miles away from anywhere I was familiar with. I had only recently moved back from Malta where I'd lived for 4 years in the sunshine, earning twice as much and living a pretty debauched lifestyle.
The first few months here were very hard; it was cold and damp and I missed the sun, also my Mum is old and getting older and more decrepit by the day.
I guess I just learned to appreciate the wonders (no, really) around me. My facebook posts are now about the great sunrises/sunsets or wildlife I've spotted from day to day. I've also started riding motorcycles again and joined some bike clubs, as well as visiting my local pub on a regular basis...just get out there and do some stuff, man..there's stloads of car and bike related events on every weekend all over the country between now and pretty much Christmas.
You'll be right, mate.
t, with intermittent good bits. It may (will) sound trite but try and learn to appreciate the great stuff which is all around you.When I moved to Leicester in October 2010 I had started a job I hated immediately and knew nobody in a town many miles away from anywhere I was familiar with. I had only recently moved back from Malta where I'd lived for 4 years in the sunshine, earning twice as much and living a pretty debauched lifestyle.
The first few months here were very hard; it was cold and damp and I missed the sun, also my Mum is old and getting older and more decrepit by the day.
I guess I just learned to appreciate the wonders (no, really) around me. My facebook posts are now about the great sunrises/sunsets or wildlife I've spotted from day to day. I've also started riding motorcycles again and joined some bike clubs, as well as visiting my local pub on a regular basis...just get out there and do some stuff, man..there's s
tloads of car and bike related events on every weekend all over the country between now and pretty much Christmas.You'll be right, mate.
as others have said their are always people worse of
but i appreciate when your sat there feeling sorry for your self, its not these others your thinking about
money health etc will be less important if you manage to find someone who you like as much as they like you
and finding that someone, well that is an unknown
ive had my moments in life where everythings been great lots of money etc, and i couldnt pull to save my life
so no one stand or relationship
then their has been moments where women all seem to love me and ive had trouble not pulling, and other than a bit of high self esteem , and fairly average looks i would say it was down to confidance and a bit of luck!
so like most things in life keep plodding on look for the good in everything, and hopefully you will hit that purple patch with the ladies!
and if you do, post up the pics lol
but i appreciate when your sat there feeling sorry for your self, its not these others your thinking about
money health etc will be less important if you manage to find someone who you like as much as they like you
and finding that someone, well that is an unknown
ive had my moments in life where everythings been great lots of money etc, and i couldnt pull to save my life
so no one stand or relationship
then their has been moments where women all seem to love me and ive had trouble not pulling, and other than a bit of high self esteem , and fairly average looks i would say it was down to confidance and a bit of luck!
so like most things in life keep plodding on look for the good in everything, and hopefully you will hit that purple patch with the ladies!
and if you do, post up the pics lol
Not all hobbies need to be expensive. I've met lots of great people and good friends through my "hobby" of running - additionally, it's relatively cheap, keeps you healthy and you can do it anywhere. Also it means you get to meet lots of fit, athletic women
I felt a bit like you during my mid-20s (now 35) and solved it by focusing more on my life and less on work. Getting that balance right was difficult, especially in an IT Consultancy career, but it has certainly paid off.
Doing what was right for me, rather than what everyone else did or what the majority expected of me was the best decision I've made.
I felt a bit like you during my mid-20s (now 35) and solved it by focusing more on my life and less on work. Getting that balance right was difficult, especially in an IT Consultancy career, but it has certainly paid off.
Doing what was right for me, rather than what everyone else did or what the majority expected of me was the best decision I've made.
jamie128 said:
i guess whatdrags me down is the lack of female communication i have outside of work, i can go as far as saying i have no female friends
You won't be meeting any on PH. You don't seem to take any of the advice other people have offerted in your gazillion other threads.How about asking the girls at work to take you out with them a few times? be honest. say you'd like some more friends. they won't bite you.
Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff