HMRC have no sense of humour

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anonymous-user

Original Poster:

56 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Boshly

2,776 posts

238 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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rofl

Eric Mc

122,216 posts

267 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Dumb thing to do as he could have invited an enquiry into his return - which could lead top a world of grief. Like Customs and Border Agency officers - don't atempt to josh with HMRC.

voyds9

8,489 posts

285 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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It's funny because it's true.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

56 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Eric Mc said:
Dumb thing to do as he could have invited an enquiry into his return - which could lead top a world of grief. Like Customs and Border Agency officers - don't atempt to josh with HMRC.
Really? Even assuming that his return is accurate, he could be inviting a world of grief?

Very sad reflection on what is supposed to be a public service.

But not surprising.


Eric Mc

122,216 posts

267 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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What "service" does HMRC provide? None at all - as far as the taxpayer is concerned. They are a government enforcement body with a tremendous amount of power and authority - that is all.

As long as people realise this, they will understand how HMRC thinks. The worst thing HMRC ever did was to start calling taxpayers "customers". It is downright misleading and not at all a true reflection of the relationship between HMRC and the taxpayer.

PugwasHDJ80

7,541 posts

223 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Eric Mc said:
What "service" does HMRC provide? None at all - as far as the taxpayer is concerned. They are a government enforcement body with a tremendous amount of power and authority - that is all.

As long as people realise this, they will understand how HMRC thinks. The worst thing HMRC ever did was to start calling taxpayers "customers". It is downright misleading and not at all a true reflection of the relationship between HMRC and the taxpayer.
doesn't mean you should run around scared of them

My ex business partner had it right- he was squeaky clean, but kept his records in as difficult position as possible, HMRC used to spend month on investigations and never found a penny (usually ended up giving him money).

The major problem is that accountants are scared of the taxman and have basically allowed themselves en masse to become an arm of the revenue. As an accountant, its a sad state of affairs.

Eric Mc

122,216 posts

267 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Why would anyone want to invite HMRC into their business to engage in investigation and enquiry work?
Surely a sensible busuiness person would be far better off using their valuable time concentrating on running and improving their business rather than giving HMRC the runaround.

I'm not scared of HMRC - but I'd much rather spend my time not having to argue with them. And most of my clients are of the same mindset.

audidoody

8,597 posts

258 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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One day I had too much time on my hands and replied to an HMRC letter requesting that they refrain from calling me a "customer" on the basis that "customers" have the freedom of choice to patronise an establishment with their "custom" and would they please refer to me as an Unwilling Victim I didn't get a reply.

P-Jay

10,611 posts

193 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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PugwasHDJ80 said:
doesn't mean you should run around scared of them

My ex business partner had it right- he was squeaky clean, but kept his records in as difficult position as possible, HMRC used to spend month on investigations and never found a penny (usually ended up giving him money).

The major problem is that accountants are scared of the taxman and have basically allowed themselves en masse to become an arm of the revenue. As an accountant, its a sad state of affairs.
I just don't recognise the picture you're trying to paint there. I don't think Accountants are scared of HMRC, frustrated maybe when trying to contact them but not scared. After all, Accountants aren't liable if it discovered a client his made a false return. I've had the "arm of the revenue" throw out before, usually when a client is told by his mate down the pub he can put a speedboat down as a business expense for his painting and decorating business or the like.

When it comes down to it, Accountants can only advise their clients, if they want to try something stupid they can go ahead, there's no sense going crying back the Accountant when HMRC want their money back, plus interest.

If you want to waste tax payers money having HMRC compete pointless investigations by making it awkward to do their job, go ahead (or rather don't I'd rather they didn’t have to) but keep in mind the HMRC don't care about it, they get paid the same ether way, but accept you are in a weaker position than HMRC and they can give you a worse day than you could ever give them.

PugwasHDJ80

7,541 posts

223 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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P-Jay said:
I just don't recognise the picture you're trying to paint there. I don't think Accountants are scared of HMRC, frustrated maybe when trying to contact them but not scared. After all, Accountants aren't liable if it discovered a client his made a false return. I've had the "arm of the revenue" throw out before, usually when a client is told by his mate down the pub he can put a speedboat down as a business expense for his painting and decorating business or the like.

When it comes down to it, Accountants can only advise their clients, if they want to try something stupid they can go ahead, there's no sense going crying back the Accountant when HMRC want their money back, plus interest.

If you want to waste tax payers money having HMRC compete pointless investigations by making it awkward to do their job, go ahead (or rather don't I'd rather they didn’t have to) but keep in mind the HMRC don't care about it, they get paid the same ether way, but accept you are in a weaker position than HMRC and they can give you a worse day than you could ever give them.
As an accountant I realise very few in the profession seem to recognise what i'm suggesting here. The point is that accountants are now far more likely to suggest any route that appeases HMRC than actually challenges HMRC, certainly in the SME arena.

Obviously some clients will want as quite a life as possible, but some clients don't want to pay tax that they've worked for, and would like help to legally achieve reductions, and will quite happoly sit in the grey area of what is open to interpretation in tax laws. Unfortunately there are fewer accountants willing to sit there at the same time.

Eric's comment is a case in point- someone makes a sarcy comment to HMRC- Erics comments is "don't do that because they might come and investigate".

that is not a healthy situation to be in.

all imo of course- and quite happy to recognise that other people take a much more pragmatic viewpoint of course.

BoRED S2upid

19,766 posts

242 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Thats a great answer and im sure gave someone in HMRC a giggle they can't all be boring accountant types some must have a sense of humor.

Digga

40,458 posts

285 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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I think his retort "who did I miss out" was even funnier.

Although as Eric says. You do not want the HMRC in your life, even if you have nothing to hide, it is like being visited by a black hole in terms of your time and sanity.

Justin Cyder

12,624 posts

151 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Yes it is. I had them here last week for a PAYE & NIC check. When I pointed out that I am a one band band & have been for seven years, it fell on deaf ears. So it was arranged for Friday morning - as I only live around the corner. No such thing as Friday afternoons eh?

Thus we spent a pointless hour going through my P11D stuff - £300 of mileage claimed last year, £600 petty cash and so on. I almost offered the woman a Starbucks at one point. I guess after ten years trading I've done ok to avoid them, but there is a reason I don't warrant the attention. I'm squeaky clean. Waste of time & effort.

Eric Mc

122,216 posts

267 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Digga said:
I think his retort "who did I miss out" was even funnier.

Although as Eric says. You do not want the HMRC in your life, even if you have nothing to hide, it is like being visited by a black hole in terms of your time and sanity.
Exactly. I'm not scared of them. But I and my clients prefer to keep them at arms length.

BliarOut

72,857 posts

241 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Eric Mc said:
Dumb thing to do as he could have invited an enquiry into his return - which could lead top a world of grief. Like Customs and Border Agency officers - don't atempt to josh with HMRC.
That could only come from an accountant biggrin

Countdown

40,180 posts

198 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Justin Cyder said:
Yes it is. I had them here last week for a PAYE & NIC check.
If you're a one-man band why are you registered for PAYE? confused

br d

8,410 posts

228 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Eric Mc said:
Digga said:
I think his retort "who did I miss out" was even funnier.

Although as Eric says. You do not want the HMRC in your life, even if you have nothing to hide, it is like being visited by a black hole in terms of your time and sanity.
Exactly. I'm not scared of them. But I and my clients prefer to keep them at arms length.
Its good advice.
Early on in my business career I made some bad choices and ended up owing the Tax/Vat man a large sum of money. I had to attend a Tax Commission (I don't think its called that any more, Eric?) where I was grilled about every last penny I spent, statements like "So, you buy a newspaper each day and sometimes a bar of chocolate, in that case we will allow you 37p a day for that".

Even my accountant looked nervous. They gave me a bare minimum to live on and every penny over goes to them, miss a payment and its goodnight.

It was fair enough though, I owed them it and they didn't bankrupt me, it took 5 years of extremely hard graft and very frugal times to pay it all back. That was 20 years ago and they've never bothered me since.

Justin Cyder

12,624 posts

151 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Countdown said:
If you're a one-man band why are you registered for PAYE? confused
Mixture of paye & dividend for tax purposes. Plus the business has run staff in the past & probably will in the future.

Eric Mc

122,216 posts

267 months

Thursday 10th January 2013
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Poking HMRC with a pointy stick is very much the Steve Irwin approach to dealing with the tax authorities.