Predictive headline competition

Predictive headline competition

Author
Discussion

Waiter

Original Poster:

537 posts

211 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
Come Monday morning the rugby headlines will have gone and there will be only one thing to fill the back pages with.

So, what are the newspaper headlines likely to be? Do your worst.

Winner gets the glory of being as capable of writing corny headlines as those who are paid to do so. Or something.

Edited by Waiter on Friday 19th October 14:05

jacobyte

4,729 posts

243 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
"Exclusive: Diana Was Up The Duff"

Probably

anonymous-user

55 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
Mourinho offered England job

motormania

1,143 posts

254 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
Hamilton our Hero

From Zero to Hero

Hero Hamilton

Move over Schumacher

what ever it may be, it'll be cheesy and ballshite, but then I don't read newspapers because I have a brain and I'm able to generate my own views - even if they are wide of the mark for some smile


Edited by motormania on Friday 19th October 14:10

Peter_1980

206 posts

214 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
On top of the world!

or the Guardian - Hamilton wins world championship.

Think we should get everyone here to take their resting pulse at the start of the race - I am nervous already.

5.0%

166 posts

199 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
Wilkinson knighted.

Waiter

Original Poster:

537 posts

211 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
World CHamilton!

or

World Chump!

or

AlonGO!!!

or

Kimi caught in pole dancing club before big race.

Stuismyname

1,706 posts

238 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
The Sun - "Ham-azing!"

The Telegraph - "Hamilton storms into history books"




Or, in the alternative:

"The stars are bright, Fernando!"

"Dev-Fer-stration for Hamilton"

"Alonso-close, and yet so far for Lewis"


Derek Smith

45,808 posts

249 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
My lad's a journalist and he said that the best one he heard of was when there was the Renault on fire in the pits at Hockenheim GP:

Holocaust Mars German Race

seemed very apt.

One of my lad's own headlines was to a story where a chap had fallen to his death from the pub, The World Turned Upside Down, in the Old Kent Road:

Man Jumps Off the World

Both done in the best possible taste.

spectatorsam

411 posts

210 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
Hamil TON UP HERO

Sau' sweet for LEW

Lew are the champion

Braz the way to do it



can't compete with tthe headline when sting got caught at the knocking shop:
" massage in a brothel"
pure genius

CiderwithCerbie

1,420 posts

268 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
TRIPLE CROWNLESS - ENGLAND GO DOWN IN FOOTBALL, RUGBY AND F1!


I am not feeling very optimistic this evening.......where's the wine waiter!

forsure

2,121 posts

269 months

Friday 19th October 2007
quotequote all
spectatorsam said:
can't compete with tthe headline when sting got caught at the knocking shop:
" massage in a brothel"
pure genius
My favourite; after Elton John 'married' David Furnish:

'Elton Takes David Up The Aisle'

The Sun.

castrolcraig

18,073 posts

207 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
well cant think of any god ens for lh when he wins but if england win rugby with a last minute jonny drop goal.....

deja-phew



Graebob

2,172 posts

208 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
CiderwithCerbie said:
TRIPLE CROWNLESS - ENGLAND GO DOWN IN FOOTBALL, RUGBY AND F1!


I am not feeling very optimistic this evening.......where's the wine waiter!
hehe

ypauly

15,137 posts

201 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
king lewis rains in brazil

15 lions rule the world



and in the corner maclaren sacked






edited to add gotta be positive

Edited by ypauly on Saturday 20th October 11:21

mark69sheer

3,906 posts

203 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
Alonso wins third title! - Hamilton rues filling up with diesel.

Madeliene - Kate is an Alien shock!

Brown changes name to Brun!

Breathing Tax - Exhaling causes climate change!

Alo Alo we're nicked - Police begin to arrest each other to reach targets!

Walking Banned - Increase in pedestrian deaths causes policy change.

Winter Big freeze predicted - Meteoroligists try again after previously predicted killer heatwave failed to materialise in 2007


Cherie Divorces Blair - After living at home with him she has finally realised what a useless waste of space he is.

New 10mph limits introduced - Studies show that being hit by a London Bus at 20mph can prove fatal.



Edited by mark69sheer on Saturday 20th October 13:01


Edited by mark69sheer on Saturday 20th October 14:23

BJG1

5,966 posts

213 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
spectatorsam said:
can't compete with tthe headline when sting got caught at the knocking shop:
" massage in a brothel"
pure genius
My favourite is still when Inverness Caledonian Thistle knocked Celtic out of the cup...

"Super-Cali Go Balistic, Celtic Are Atrocious"

Teppic

7,394 posts

258 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
"Alonslow no match for Hamilton" - The Mirror

"Hamilton wins and makes history" - The Times

"Himalton wins the Chipmiosnhip" - The Guardian

"Ban this filth" - The Mail

"Keeley gets her tits out. See them on page 3" - The Sun




CiderwithCerbie

1,420 posts

268 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
CiderwithCerbie said:
TRIPLE CROWNLESS - ENGLAND GO DOWN IN FOOTBALL, RUGBY AND F1!


I am not feeling very optimistic this evening.......where's the wine waiter!
Sat 10pm - 2 out out of three done & dusted and Hamilton in a Ferrari sandwich.....

Petros

2,441 posts

230 months

Saturday 20th October 2007
quotequote all
Alonso takes out Hamilton and Raikonnen steals it at the death.