Hilariously bad spam emails...
Discussion
Ladies and gentlemen - anyone who falls for this needs a darn good shoeing:
Spam said:
Good Day,
I have a secured business proposal of Twenty Two million Four Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars only for you.l will like to know if you
are willing to assit me,lf intrested please contact me on my private
email address(poon_jos714@yahoo.com.hk) for more details.Your earliest
response to this mail will be highly appreciated.
My Esteemed Regards,
Joseph Poon.
I have a secured business proposal of Twenty Two million Four Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars only for you.l will like to know if you
are willing to assit me,lf intrested please contact me on my private
email address(poon_jos714@yahoo.com.hk) for more details.Your earliest
response to this mail will be highly appreciated.
My Esteemed Regards,
Joseph Poon.
had this gem today...
Greetings from Russia to you dear friend!!!
I hope, that this letter will cause you interest.
It is possible this letter will change our destinies... I ask you to give some minutes and to read my history.
For the First! This letter from agency of dating of the internet.
I have given them this letter and to me has told, that they will send it to the Great Britain.
My name - Marina. I - from Russia, Saint Petersburg.
I’m - 27 years old woman. My Birthday March, 14 1981.
I want to tell you that was happened with me. Some time ago I have got acquainted through Internet with the man. His name is Patrick from Liverpool. We began to correspond with each other. Shortly we had sympathies to each other. I would not tell that it there was a love, but the sympathy was big. We have thought that our relations should leave on a new stage and both wished a meeting. I have collected all necessary documents, and in August I receive the visa.
But that there was further it awfully. Patrick has written to me that is not ready to serious relations with me and would not want that I came. It has very strongly shaken me, I did not expect that he can do it... I cried and did not know what to do, I was deceived.
I want to forget this awful liar faster. And to use the chance which has dropped out to me.
The purpose of my letter: I shall receive the Visa of the Visitor of the Great Britain on August.
I want to arrive to the Great Britain, but I have no any friends or familiar who
can meet me on airport. I really hope, that you can do it for me.
But if you will answer to me I will write more about me and about my life.
Probably we can develop our relations also.
So, please, write to me on my E-mail: kirich.marina27@gmail.com
I hope, that you will have interest after reading my letter.
Also I have interest too. Please inform me:
1 - your name?
2 - your city?
3 - your age?
4 - to send me your photo also?
5 - would you like to meet the woman for love?
Ok, I will close for now, but I will wait your answer so much!!!
I really hope that you will give me chance to have meeting!!!
Waiting for your answer,
Yours friend Marina from Russia.
the email address it claims to come from is
trglyj@boardroomconsultants.com
reply if you want, tell Marina I can't help as she has the name of a rubbish car.
Greetings from Russia to you dear friend!!!
I hope, that this letter will cause you interest.
It is possible this letter will change our destinies... I ask you to give some minutes and to read my history.
For the First! This letter from agency of dating of the internet.
I have given them this letter and to me has told, that they will send it to the Great Britain.
My name - Marina. I - from Russia, Saint Petersburg.
I’m - 27 years old woman. My Birthday March, 14 1981.
I want to tell you that was happened with me. Some time ago I have got acquainted through Internet with the man. His name is Patrick from Liverpool. We began to correspond with each other. Shortly we had sympathies to each other. I would not tell that it there was a love, but the sympathy was big. We have thought that our relations should leave on a new stage and both wished a meeting. I have collected all necessary documents, and in August I receive the visa.
But that there was further it awfully. Patrick has written to me that is not ready to serious relations with me and would not want that I came. It has very strongly shaken me, I did not expect that he can do it... I cried and did not know what to do, I was deceived.
I want to forget this awful liar faster. And to use the chance which has dropped out to me.
The purpose of my letter: I shall receive the Visa of the Visitor of the Great Britain on August.
I want to arrive to the Great Britain, but I have no any friends or familiar who
can meet me on airport. I really hope, that you can do it for me.
But if you will answer to me I will write more about me and about my life.
Probably we can develop our relations also.
So, please, write to me on my E-mail: kirich.marina27@gmail.com
I hope, that you will have interest after reading my letter.
Also I have interest too. Please inform me:
1 - your name?
2 - your city?
3 - your age?
4 - to send me your photo also?
5 - would you like to meet the woman for love?
Ok, I will close for now, but I will wait your answer so much!!!
I really hope that you will give me chance to have meeting!!!
Waiting for your answer,
Yours friend Marina from Russia.
the email address it claims to come from is
trglyj@boardroomconsultants.com
reply if you want, tell Marina I can't help as she has the name of a rubbish car.
Got this one this morning
Dear Lloyds TSB Bank Customer,
We recently have determined that different computers have logged into your Lloyds TSB
Bank account, and multiple password failures were present before the
logons. For this reason your Account has been Suspended. To Re-activate,
you are required to re-log into your account correctly and Re-activate your account
activities.
We thank you for your co-operation in this manner.
To log into your account and Re-activate your account activity, click here:
https:// online.lloydstsb.co.uk/customer.ibc
Actually the link is from this site http://www.rk-tulln.at/berichte/parse/customer.ibc...
We appreciate your support and understanding, as we work together to keep Lloyds TSB a safe place to do business.
Thank you for your patience in this matter.
Trust and Safety Department
Lloyds TSB Bank
Please do not reply to this e-mail as this is only a notification. Mail sent to
this address cannot be answered.
Ran a whois trail back to the owner of the email
http://www.whois.is/whois-at/ip-address/rk-tulln.a...
personname:
organization: Rotes Kreuz Tulln
street address: Wienerstrasse 27
postal code: A-3430
city: Tulln
country: Austria
e-mail: office@edv-schuster.com
nic-hdl: RKT1557348-NICAT
changed: 20040401 03:51:14
source: AT-DOM
http://www.whois.is/whois-com/ip-address/edv-schus... - seems to
be personal site
http://www.whois.is/whois-at/ip-address/aon.at/ - seems to be ISP site
Love the way phishers leave a nice trail back to the real them
Dear Lloyds TSB Bank Customer,
We recently have determined that different computers have logged into your Lloyds TSB
Bank account, and multiple password failures were present before the
logons. For this reason your Account has been Suspended. To Re-activate,
you are required to re-log into your account correctly and Re-activate your account
activities.
We thank you for your co-operation in this manner.
To log into your account and Re-activate your account activity, click here:
https:// online.lloydstsb.co.uk/customer.ibc
Actually the link is from this site http://www.rk-tulln.at/berichte/parse/customer.ibc...
We appreciate your support and understanding, as we work together to keep Lloyds TSB a safe place to do business.
Thank you for your patience in this matter.
Trust and Safety Department
Lloyds TSB Bank
Please do not reply to this e-mail as this is only a notification. Mail sent to
this address cannot be answered.
Ran a whois trail back to the owner of the email
http://www.whois.is/whois-at/ip-address/rk-tulln.a...
personname:
organization: Rotes Kreuz Tulln
street address: Wienerstrasse 27
postal code: A-3430
city: Tulln
country: Austria
e-mail: office@edv-schuster.com
nic-hdl: RKT1557348-NICAT
changed: 20040401 03:51:14
source: AT-DOM
http://www.whois.is/whois-com/ip-address/edv-schus... - seems to
be personal site
http://www.whois.is/whois-at/ip-address/aon.at/ - seems to be ISP site
Love the way phishers leave a nice trail back to the real them
ds! My son runs a more elaborate scam than that on me to try and get some extra cash...Beefmeister said:
Ladies and gentlemen - anyone who falls for this needs a darn good shoeing:
He could team up with Mr Tang of chinese take-away fame and create a crime fighting duo Poon & Tang. Spam said:
Good Day,
I have a secured business proposal of Twenty Two million Four Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars only for you.l will like to know if you
are willing to assit me,lf intrested please contact me on my private
email address(poon_jos714@yahoo.com.hk) for more details.Your earliest
response to this mail will be highly appreciated.
My Esteemed Regards,
Joseph Poon.
I have a secured business proposal of Twenty Two million Four Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars only for you.l will like to know if you
are willing to assit me,lf intrested please contact me on my private
email address(poon_jos714@yahoo.com.hk) for more details.Your earliest
response to this mail will be highly appreciated.
My Esteemed Regards,
Joseph Poon.
Don't know if this has been posted here before, but if you have a lot of time to kill it's an amusing way. Taking on the email scammers:
http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/
NSFW
http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/
NSFW
Edited by Shaolin on Thursday 14th August 19:48
Shaolin said:
Don't know if this has been posted here before, but if you have a lot of time to kill it's an amusing way. Taking on the email scammers:
http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/
Site contains loads of nudity, best you flag it nsfw.http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/
Scraggles said:
Actually the link is from http://www.rk-tulln.at/berichte/parse/customer.ibc...
Gosh, I'm impressed with FireFox's warning on visiting that! 
Ooh just remembered!
I had one a couple of years ago for penis enlargement with the subject line - "Ideal Gift"
Well Mum and Dad, I thought I'd get you something for the both of you this Chrsitmas so..
or..
Happy retirement Bob, here's something to help you and Mary make the most of your extra free time.
I had one a couple of years ago for penis enlargement with the subject line - "Ideal Gift"
Well Mum and Dad, I thought I'd get you something for the both of you this Chrsitmas so..
or..
Happy retirement Bob, here's something to help you and Mary make the most of your extra free time.
Good job I kept my one
pillock said:
Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA
Dear Mr. Sir,
REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL
I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.
In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.
Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.
Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.
Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.
Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number only.
Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
tip@nasrda.gov.ng
http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA
Dear Mr. Sir,
REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL
I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.
In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.
Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.
Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.
Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.
Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number only.
Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
tip@nasrda.gov.ng
http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/
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