Fear of moving jobs / dilema
Discussion
I did post this on another forum but thought I'd post here as well to get extra perspective.
Been in my job for 9 years. Its easy, secure, stress-free, and I can work from home 3 days a week. However I've not progressed at all in those 9 years. Started off as one of the 'young' ones in my role but as everyone started to leave or progress I'm no longer the youngest. Younger and fresher people come in whilst I'm doing the same old admin type job. Not had a pay rise either in those 9 years other then the usual 2%. I have pushed for new opportunities but they never seem to happen for me and say I need to improve on this and that, which I do but nothing despite being a big company I work for. Tbh as time as gone on found myself to become more and more bitter that I haven't progressed. There was a sales role I possibly could have got but not sure sales is for me.
However as soon as I apply for other jobs and get interviews I panic and suddenly the job I want to leave become amazing. 'it's secure', 'I can work from home 3 days a week', etc.
Potentially being offered a new job for £4-5k a year more. However it's in a different industry that is new to me, its office based with some travel involved so a car is provided . So now of course I'm panicking 'am I making the right decision' 'leaving a secure job for the unknown', etc?
How does anybody get over the anxiety of moving jobs? Am I making the right decision to move jobs?
Been in my job for 9 years. Its easy, secure, stress-free, and I can work from home 3 days a week. However I've not progressed at all in those 9 years. Started off as one of the 'young' ones in my role but as everyone started to leave or progress I'm no longer the youngest. Younger and fresher people come in whilst I'm doing the same old admin type job. Not had a pay rise either in those 9 years other then the usual 2%. I have pushed for new opportunities but they never seem to happen for me and say I need to improve on this and that, which I do but nothing despite being a big company I work for. Tbh as time as gone on found myself to become more and more bitter that I haven't progressed. There was a sales role I possibly could have got but not sure sales is for me.
However as soon as I apply for other jobs and get interviews I panic and suddenly the job I want to leave become amazing. 'it's secure', 'I can work from home 3 days a week', etc.
Potentially being offered a new job for £4-5k a year more. However it's in a different industry that is new to me, its office based with some travel involved so a car is provided . So now of course I'm panicking 'am I making the right decision' 'leaving a secure job for the unknown', etc?
How does anybody get over the anxiety of moving jobs? Am I making the right decision to move jobs?
Thanks for all the responses everybody. Definitely helped to put my worries into perspective. Think if I was going to get promoted within the company it would have happened within the first 3 years not now after nearly 9 years. I do have a mortgage so that's what adds to my fears as well as the stressfree life and working from home however my partner thinks I should leave also to put a fire back into me.
MB140 said:
I feel your anxiety. I’ve served 25 years in the RAF and my current role is going meaning I will lose £6k a year flying pay. There is every chance I will have to move to the opposite end of the country or at best end up living in the mess and commuting home to see my wife on the weekend.
My dads nearly 80, has a wealth of health problems. My current role and location means I can get to see him in an hour if needs be. (COPD, early stage heart failure, mental health issues (he once threatened/tried to commit suicide due to depression and loneliness)
Last month I started to have some minor anxiety issues at the thought of having to leave. My wife was amazing and supportive.
I do feel your pain.
One of the things my wife did was to get me to list all the positives I have in a) life b) qualifications c) experience and skills etc. Then look at jobs those skills transfer to.
Then she got me to asses our finances and what my pension and lump sum would be if I left.
I acknowledge I’m very lucky in that my wife earns a great salary and me not working and having no income wouldn’t change our life style it would just be a stubborn male pride thing.
Reference stevebee above, I’m most definitely institutionalised, I realise it must come to an end soon but I’m not looking forward to leaving.
Sorry I’ve digresses (bit of therapy for me writing it down), my point being list the positives of each. Only look at the positive side of your options. Worked for me. Hopefully it will work for you.
Or just ignore me, I’m just a waffling idiot. Either way I wish you the best for your future.
Thanks for this. I really like the idea of only looking at the positives rather then the negatives. The positives of the potential new job far outweigh the positives of the current. Alot of the negatives are based on fears rather then actual factMy dads nearly 80, has a wealth of health problems. My current role and location means I can get to see him in an hour if needs be. (COPD, early stage heart failure, mental health issues (he once threatened/tried to commit suicide due to depression and loneliness)
Last month I started to have some minor anxiety issues at the thought of having to leave. My wife was amazing and supportive.
I do feel your pain.
One of the things my wife did was to get me to list all the positives I have in a) life b) qualifications c) experience and skills etc. Then look at jobs those skills transfer to.
Then she got me to asses our finances and what my pension and lump sum would be if I left.
I acknowledge I’m very lucky in that my wife earns a great salary and me not working and having no income wouldn’t change our life style it would just be a stubborn male pride thing.
Reference stevebee above, I’m most definitely institutionalised, I realise it must come to an end soon but I’m not looking forward to leaving.
Sorry I’ve digresses (bit of therapy for me writing it down), my point being list the positives of each. Only look at the positive side of your options. Worked for me. Hopefully it will work for you.
Or just ignore me, I’m just a waffling idiot. Either way I wish you the best for your future.
Edited by MB140 on Tuesday 8th June 13:59
Update on this.
Accepted the job. £6k pay rise which is obviously nice. Obviously I'm bricking it as I'm so comfortable where I am but the advice on here really hit home. Change is only a good thing whether it works or not don't want to be a bitter 40+ year old if I don't make the move. Thanks all for the input.
Accepted the job. £6k pay rise which is obviously nice. Obviously I'm bricking it as I'm so comfortable where I am but the advice on here really hit home. Change is only a good thing whether it works or not don't want to be a bitter 40+ year old if I don't make the move. Thanks all for the input.
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