Coping with grief
Discussion
It's been a long while since I came to PH; I guess I just need a place to let it all out and place my thoughts out in the "anonymous" open. A few of you may know me, but the vast majority don't so perhaps that is what I need.
On Tuesday, my beloved dog, Lady was put to sleep. From the moment she took her last breath, I have been devastated, depressed, angry, wrought with guilt and very lonely.
Lady was my little girl. A small 7kg rescue dog and we believed she was very similar to a Pembroke Sheltie.
She had a wonderful, mischievous nature, but beyond all, she was kind and intensely loyal. We used to take her to my sons nursery, and she would revel playing with all the children, but most of all remaining close to our boy making sure he was safe and happy.
I adopted Lady through my now wife. When I came to her home for the first time, this small 5 month old pup came to me and wanted to play. We bonded immediately and while it's not the reason I married my wife, she was part of the "package", and she gave me a family when I had none.
Lady was not unique with dogs in the fact she liked food, but she was unique in the fact she loved fruit. So I trained her with all the basics using watermelon!
As my relationship with my now wife grew, so did that of mine with Lady. I took her everywhere. She even once came night-clubbing with me in Tarifa, and then spent the following morning on the beach chasing and befriending the kite-surfers while me and my friends lay in the shade, hung over from the previous night.
Lady was also insanely energetic. She remained by my side when I went running, and even when I went for short cycles. She even managed a 10km run with me....struggling towards the end but we finished with her in my arms much to her relief I'm sure!
She would also listen to me whenever I needed to talk. She never disappeared or walked off when talking about my problems, my worries or just simply my thoughts. And she would be by my side the moment I called for her.
We actually have two dogs. The other really belongs to my wife through and through. She's a lovely character, but she's not my Lady. She doesn't listen to me. She doesn't stay by my side, and she doesn't have the energy to play sports with me or just a bit of tug of war.
When we got married just under four years ago, our dogs were our "Pup Bearers". The look on my parents faces were priceless, but we could think of no better friends to bring us our rings. They performed their role with total perfection, and each one of our dogs came to us with rings attached!!
In short, Lady was my best friend and as my wife said; My shadow.
Move forward a number of years and my wife became pregnant. A maternal side to Lady emerged and while she remained very close to me, she forged a friendship with the bump growing on my wife. Lady would rest herself against it whenever she could and never strayed far.
When my son was born, Lady was smitten. My son was her pup, and she never left his side once. When we were around the house doing things, Lady would keep her eyes fixed on my son keeping guard and the moment he cried, she would rush to find me or my wife. My son would pull and tug at her hair, and she never once flinched and instead just moved closer.
As my son grew, the two became incredible friends. They would play together often and of course, there was no better vacuum cleaner when my son dropped his food!
The two of them slept together, played together, watched TV together and just generally hung out together. "Lady" was one of my sons first words and in recent months, we would often be awoken by my son shouting, "Lady! Where are you?!?!?!!?".
Through all this, Lady and I remained very close.
Then things began to change.
Back in February, we noticed Lady throwing up a lot. It wasn't always but every once in a while she would eat and it would all come back up. We took her to the vets, and we were advised it was gastro, so it was a strict diet for a couple of weeks to get her back on form. The words "strict" and "diet" in a food motivated dog are one of the hardest things to achieve, but we tried our best and eventually Lady looked to be back on form.
By May time, she was still throwing up a little but not massively. We thought it was down to literally inhaling her food, so we tried break her larger biscuits down and place her dry-food in a slow-feeder.
We then went on a family holiday, back in Tarifa again all sharing the same room together. We found during that holiday, Lady paced throughout the night, and she also threw up quite a bit too. My wife and I ignorantly put it down to a change of routine and anxiousness.
My wife took Lady to the vet again explaining her mood and symptoms and the vet mentioned that now my son was in nursery, she was anxious and missed him. This would explain her over-excitement when arriving home and new habit of barking.
She also became the world's-best Houdini Dog, managing to escape over our fence and I ended up raising it twice to over 2m, preventing her from escaping.
This wasn't like Lady.
About four weeks ago, our neighbours daughter started doing a summer chore with us taking both Lady and Honey (our other dog), for daily morning walks. Since my wife went back to work, their walking had dropped dramatically, so we thought this would be a great way to reduce Lady's anxiety issues.
It sort of helped to a degree. She loved the attention and walks she was now getting more frequently, but over the weeks we noticed her vomiting occurring more frequently, and she was losing a huge amount of weight.
Over two weeks, I kept telling my wife she had to visit the vets so eventually on Monday 5th, this week, we took her along. The vet was clearly concerned as she was literally a sack of bones (albeit with mountains of energy).
We x-rayed her with me helping and found her stomach appeared to be full of something strange. The vet said she most likely had some sort of obstruction, and she would need surgery to remove it. The best guess was the filler within her toys. I asked for this to be done as soon as possible so it was agreed to do the surgery the following day.
Early on Tuesday morning I came downstairs and Lady came to greet me. We had a little chat and I told her everything would be ok and while she might have a little pain from the surgery, she would be home before she knew it and I would have plenty of treats for her to put her weight back on.
I gave her a hug and a kiss, and I set off for work not thinking much more of it. I knew she was in good hands.
At 1.30pm, I received a phone call from my wife and she asked me to sit down. I knew instantly that tone was not good.
The vets had done a complete internal investigation of Lady and found her stomach was completely empty, but instead, cancer had completely eaten away at her liver and he gall bladder was at bursting point. They removed two large syringes of bile from the gall bladder and continued their examination. He stomach was already showing signs of cancer and so was her bladder. The cancer was so advanced, the vet told me Lady's liver looked like bubble wrap and she said there was nothing she could do.
They sewed her back up and called my wife to give her the new and my wife in turn told me.
Without hesitation, I dropped everything at work and drove quickly to the vets to be with my girl. I already knew what the outcome would be but I didn't say anything.
The vet knew me well and she'd known my wife since she was a little girl so there was a real sadness yet warmth from the staff who worked there.
She led me straight to Lady who was kept semi-sedated so I could say my good byes. I spent about half an hour with her and my wife arrived in that time to say her good byes.
The vet reiterated that while she could come home, her quality of life would deteriorate rapidly and she would effectively starve herself to death while also risking sepsis which would be incredibly painful for her. The reassuring part was she never endured any real pain and to put her asleep now, would be the best possible choice.
We both very reluctantly agreed. I selfishly wanted to take her home and keep her by my side but I knew the right thing to do was to put her to sleep.
Once agreed and we were ready, I held onto her as the vet administered the dose into her intravenous line and I stayed with her, stroking her but she didn't appear to be going. I asked the vet to check her as I could feel her breath and her eyes moving so I was asked to leave the room while they checked. I didn't want her to suffer.
After what felt like an eternity but was probably only 30 seconds, I came back into the room, to her at the moment she took her last breath.
I stayed with her for a while longer and my wife took some tufts of her hair to keep, and I took her collar off.
On the 6th August, at around 3pm, Lady passed away and I felt dead inside.
I have to confess the rest was a blur, but back in my car I remember making an almighty scream and just cupping my head between my hands.
I drove home and arriving back, everything felt so wrong. Her bed, her toys, her fur everywhere, even her poop in the garden. It just felt surreal.
My wife and I just sat in silence with tears running out of our eyes until we realised we had to pick up our son from nursery. What would we tell him? How would he understand?
We decided to take Honey with us and drove together to collect my son. Upon seeing us he called out and then saw Honey. "Where Lady?", he asked?
We told him Lady was unwell and had to leave us to live in Rainbow Bridge to get better and one day he would see her again. (My wife told me about this place before as this is what her parents had told her as a child).
For the rest of the day my son kept repeating, "Lady, rainbow!"
I'll leave it up to you to guess how we felt about that.
That night was horrific. We put my son to bed as soon as we could so we could have time to ourselves, but the reminders were everywhere. Food on the floor, and our evening walk routine completely different. Honey our other dog also remained in her bed, where she would usually trail behind Lady.
Everything felt wrong.
That evening, we stayed awake into the early hours in tears questioning everything.
What could we of done? Were we good carers to our dogs? Did we make the right choice? Why did it happen to us? Why did it happen to Lady?
We beat ourselves up about it, and then morning came. I looked a mess and my colleagues were shocked. It looked like I had taken a physical beating and it felt that way.
I left work early, exhausted and depressed.
A couple of days on and I still feel the same. I am battling with the same question and trying to justify everything that happened but I can't.
I know time is a healer and eventually I'll come to terms with it, but losing my four-legged friend has to be the most emotionally painful experience I've ever had to endure.
As Lady was my first dog, I have learnt one thing. If you take on a pet, you will inevitably open yourself up to pain.
Sorry. Just had to get some of my thoughts out somewhere.
On Tuesday, my beloved dog, Lady was put to sleep. From the moment she took her last breath, I have been devastated, depressed, angry, wrought with guilt and very lonely.
Lady was my little girl. A small 7kg rescue dog and we believed she was very similar to a Pembroke Sheltie.
She had a wonderful, mischievous nature, but beyond all, she was kind and intensely loyal. We used to take her to my sons nursery, and she would revel playing with all the children, but most of all remaining close to our boy making sure he was safe and happy.
I adopted Lady through my now wife. When I came to her home for the first time, this small 5 month old pup came to me and wanted to play. We bonded immediately and while it's not the reason I married my wife, she was part of the "package", and she gave me a family when I had none.
Lady was not unique with dogs in the fact she liked food, but she was unique in the fact she loved fruit. So I trained her with all the basics using watermelon!
As my relationship with my now wife grew, so did that of mine with Lady. I took her everywhere. She even once came night-clubbing with me in Tarifa, and then spent the following morning on the beach chasing and befriending the kite-surfers while me and my friends lay in the shade, hung over from the previous night.
Lady was also insanely energetic. She remained by my side when I went running, and even when I went for short cycles. She even managed a 10km run with me....struggling towards the end but we finished with her in my arms much to her relief I'm sure!
She would also listen to me whenever I needed to talk. She never disappeared or walked off when talking about my problems, my worries or just simply my thoughts. And she would be by my side the moment I called for her.
We actually have two dogs. The other really belongs to my wife through and through. She's a lovely character, but she's not my Lady. She doesn't listen to me. She doesn't stay by my side, and she doesn't have the energy to play sports with me or just a bit of tug of war.
When we got married just under four years ago, our dogs were our "Pup Bearers". The look on my parents faces were priceless, but we could think of no better friends to bring us our rings. They performed their role with total perfection, and each one of our dogs came to us with rings attached!!
In short, Lady was my best friend and as my wife said; My shadow.
Move forward a number of years and my wife became pregnant. A maternal side to Lady emerged and while she remained very close to me, she forged a friendship with the bump growing on my wife. Lady would rest herself against it whenever she could and never strayed far.
When my son was born, Lady was smitten. My son was her pup, and she never left his side once. When we were around the house doing things, Lady would keep her eyes fixed on my son keeping guard and the moment he cried, she would rush to find me or my wife. My son would pull and tug at her hair, and she never once flinched and instead just moved closer.
As my son grew, the two became incredible friends. They would play together often and of course, there was no better vacuum cleaner when my son dropped his food!
The two of them slept together, played together, watched TV together and just generally hung out together. "Lady" was one of my sons first words and in recent months, we would often be awoken by my son shouting, "Lady! Where are you?!?!?!!?".
Through all this, Lady and I remained very close.
Then things began to change.
Back in February, we noticed Lady throwing up a lot. It wasn't always but every once in a while she would eat and it would all come back up. We took her to the vets, and we were advised it was gastro, so it was a strict diet for a couple of weeks to get her back on form. The words "strict" and "diet" in a food motivated dog are one of the hardest things to achieve, but we tried our best and eventually Lady looked to be back on form.
By May time, she was still throwing up a little but not massively. We thought it was down to literally inhaling her food, so we tried break her larger biscuits down and place her dry-food in a slow-feeder.
We then went on a family holiday, back in Tarifa again all sharing the same room together. We found during that holiday, Lady paced throughout the night, and she also threw up quite a bit too. My wife and I ignorantly put it down to a change of routine and anxiousness.
My wife took Lady to the vet again explaining her mood and symptoms and the vet mentioned that now my son was in nursery, she was anxious and missed him. This would explain her over-excitement when arriving home and new habit of barking.
She also became the world's-best Houdini Dog, managing to escape over our fence and I ended up raising it twice to over 2m, preventing her from escaping.
This wasn't like Lady.
About four weeks ago, our neighbours daughter started doing a summer chore with us taking both Lady and Honey (our other dog), for daily morning walks. Since my wife went back to work, their walking had dropped dramatically, so we thought this would be a great way to reduce Lady's anxiety issues.
It sort of helped to a degree. She loved the attention and walks she was now getting more frequently, but over the weeks we noticed her vomiting occurring more frequently, and she was losing a huge amount of weight.
Over two weeks, I kept telling my wife she had to visit the vets so eventually on Monday 5th, this week, we took her along. The vet was clearly concerned as she was literally a sack of bones (albeit with mountains of energy).
We x-rayed her with me helping and found her stomach appeared to be full of something strange. The vet said she most likely had some sort of obstruction, and she would need surgery to remove it. The best guess was the filler within her toys. I asked for this to be done as soon as possible so it was agreed to do the surgery the following day.
Early on Tuesday morning I came downstairs and Lady came to greet me. We had a little chat and I told her everything would be ok and while she might have a little pain from the surgery, she would be home before she knew it and I would have plenty of treats for her to put her weight back on.
I gave her a hug and a kiss, and I set off for work not thinking much more of it. I knew she was in good hands.
At 1.30pm, I received a phone call from my wife and she asked me to sit down. I knew instantly that tone was not good.
The vets had done a complete internal investigation of Lady and found her stomach was completely empty, but instead, cancer had completely eaten away at her liver and he gall bladder was at bursting point. They removed two large syringes of bile from the gall bladder and continued their examination. He stomach was already showing signs of cancer and so was her bladder. The cancer was so advanced, the vet told me Lady's liver looked like bubble wrap and she said there was nothing she could do.
They sewed her back up and called my wife to give her the new and my wife in turn told me.
Without hesitation, I dropped everything at work and drove quickly to the vets to be with my girl. I already knew what the outcome would be but I didn't say anything.
The vet knew me well and she'd known my wife since she was a little girl so there was a real sadness yet warmth from the staff who worked there.
She led me straight to Lady who was kept semi-sedated so I could say my good byes. I spent about half an hour with her and my wife arrived in that time to say her good byes.
The vet reiterated that while she could come home, her quality of life would deteriorate rapidly and she would effectively starve herself to death while also risking sepsis which would be incredibly painful for her. The reassuring part was she never endured any real pain and to put her asleep now, would be the best possible choice.
We both very reluctantly agreed. I selfishly wanted to take her home and keep her by my side but I knew the right thing to do was to put her to sleep.
Once agreed and we were ready, I held onto her as the vet administered the dose into her intravenous line and I stayed with her, stroking her but she didn't appear to be going. I asked the vet to check her as I could feel her breath and her eyes moving so I was asked to leave the room while they checked. I didn't want her to suffer.
After what felt like an eternity but was probably only 30 seconds, I came back into the room, to her at the moment she took her last breath.
I stayed with her for a while longer and my wife took some tufts of her hair to keep, and I took her collar off.
On the 6th August, at around 3pm, Lady passed away and I felt dead inside.
I have to confess the rest was a blur, but back in my car I remember making an almighty scream and just cupping my head between my hands.
I drove home and arriving back, everything felt so wrong. Her bed, her toys, her fur everywhere, even her poop in the garden. It just felt surreal.
My wife and I just sat in silence with tears running out of our eyes until we realised we had to pick up our son from nursery. What would we tell him? How would he understand?
We decided to take Honey with us and drove together to collect my son. Upon seeing us he called out and then saw Honey. "Where Lady?", he asked?
We told him Lady was unwell and had to leave us to live in Rainbow Bridge to get better and one day he would see her again. (My wife told me about this place before as this is what her parents had told her as a child).
For the rest of the day my son kept repeating, "Lady, rainbow!"
I'll leave it up to you to guess how we felt about that.
That night was horrific. We put my son to bed as soon as we could so we could have time to ourselves, but the reminders were everywhere. Food on the floor, and our evening walk routine completely different. Honey our other dog also remained in her bed, where she would usually trail behind Lady.
Everything felt wrong.
That evening, we stayed awake into the early hours in tears questioning everything.
What could we of done? Were we good carers to our dogs? Did we make the right choice? Why did it happen to us? Why did it happen to Lady?
We beat ourselves up about it, and then morning came. I looked a mess and my colleagues were shocked. It looked like I had taken a physical beating and it felt that way.
I left work early, exhausted and depressed.
A couple of days on and I still feel the same. I am battling with the same question and trying to justify everything that happened but I can't.
I know time is a healer and eventually I'll come to terms with it, but losing my four-legged friend has to be the most emotionally painful experience I've ever had to endure.
As Lady was my first dog, I have learnt one thing. If you take on a pet, you will inevitably open yourself up to pain.
Sorry. Just had to get some of my thoughts out somewhere.
addsvrs said:
We have just been through this this morning (9th). Our 16 year old retriever finally gave up the fight after going down hill this week. The drive to the vets was truly awful, even though she was bright eyed she had lost all control of her back legs. We knew it was coming, and even though we have been through this a few times before its still the worst thing to have to do.
Mixed emotions of relief (no more pain), guilt (did we leave it too long) and complete emptiness. Even our other dog is extremely quiet today
The only thing that helps me is taking about the good times (16 years is damn good) and all the trouble and strife she caused. But also the love she gave and received.
Bizarrely me and the wife had talked about this scenerio only last week and she was convinced she was waiting for my son to return from Army exercise in Canada after being away for 9 weeks. This morning he returned home.
RIP Ellie
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss Mixed emotions of relief (no more pain), guilt (did we leave it too long) and complete emptiness. Even our other dog is extremely quiet today
The only thing that helps me is taking about the good times (16 years is damn good) and all the trouble and strife she caused. But also the love she gave and received.
Bizarrely me and the wife had talked about this scenerio only last week and she was convinced she was waiting for my son to return from Army exercise in Canada after being away for 9 weeks. This morning he returned home.
RIP Ellie
My heart goes out to you. Who would ever know our pets could mean so much to us.
Thank you to the others for the very kind words of support offered too. I will try and offer more than this to you down the line but I do appreciate your support.
I thought I should include a photo of my girl. Missing her every second....
Good morning all.
First I want to reiterate my thanks to all of you for your replies and thoughts, and I also want to say again that my heart goes out to all those other owners who've lost their little side-kicks.
Who knew pets could create so much grief?
I'm slowly coming to terms with everything but I've had family visiting so while I've been distracted, I've not had "alone" time to process everything in my head.
Mornings are now very dull and quiet. I miss my girl jumping up to greet me and I regret the days I was in a hurry to get to work and I ignored her. The garden is now looking pristine without any poop and I'm considering removing the fence extensions I installed to prevent Lady escaping.
I've also noticed weird things like my robo vacuum being mostly empty when I clear the bucket in the morning. When we had Lady, the bucket would be full of her hairs every morning! Honey doesn't shed hairs much so it's more or less empty and full of leftover crumbs that she would otherwise eat up.
I accidentally called out her name without thinking a couple of times when letting Honey out to do her night-time pee before I took her up to our room at night. In the past, both dogs would tear out of the house at full pelt (Lady ahead by far), and they would run up the road and back again before having a quick pee on the grass. I shouted out Lady's name stopping short feeling like a muppet and also very down.
Still, that was a few days back and I do feel better.
We also received the vet bill which I was dreading, but she was very kind and gave us some big discounts for everything. She also remove the charge for euthanising Lady altogether which was thoughtful in an odd way.
Next week we need to collect her ashes and I'm dreading that. I suggested to my wife spreading her ashes in her favourite places, but she has asked for more time to think about it and suggested keeping her in one place. Let's see what we do as Lady was her dog too.
So there we have it. Slow but steady progress I guess, but I miss my little girl intensely.
First I want to reiterate my thanks to all of you for your replies and thoughts, and I also want to say again that my heart goes out to all those other owners who've lost their little side-kicks.
Who knew pets could create so much grief?
I'm slowly coming to terms with everything but I've had family visiting so while I've been distracted, I've not had "alone" time to process everything in my head.
Mornings are now very dull and quiet. I miss my girl jumping up to greet me and I regret the days I was in a hurry to get to work and I ignored her. The garden is now looking pristine without any poop and I'm considering removing the fence extensions I installed to prevent Lady escaping.
I've also noticed weird things like my robo vacuum being mostly empty when I clear the bucket in the morning. When we had Lady, the bucket would be full of her hairs every morning! Honey doesn't shed hairs much so it's more or less empty and full of leftover crumbs that she would otherwise eat up.
I accidentally called out her name without thinking a couple of times when letting Honey out to do her night-time pee before I took her up to our room at night. In the past, both dogs would tear out of the house at full pelt (Lady ahead by far), and they would run up the road and back again before having a quick pee on the grass. I shouted out Lady's name stopping short feeling like a muppet and also very down.
Still, that was a few days back and I do feel better.
We also received the vet bill which I was dreading, but she was very kind and gave us some big discounts for everything. She also remove the charge for euthanising Lady altogether which was thoughtful in an odd way.
Next week we need to collect her ashes and I'm dreading that. I suggested to my wife spreading her ashes in her favourite places, but she has asked for more time to think about it and suggested keeping her in one place. Let's see what we do as Lady was her dog too.
So there we have it. Slow but steady progress I guess, but I miss my little girl intensely.
Morning all. I thought since a few months past, I would give you a little update on my situation.
I still miss Lady daily and there's a huge amount of grief left inside me but things are most definitely better. I read through my original post and it brought a huge amount of sadness and tears to my eyes again. I guess it's all to be expected.
My work suffered too as I felt quite depressed for a while and when I spoke to a HR councillor at work, I felt like I was going barking mad, but he was very understanding, and after a discussion with my boss, I was given a lot of slack and support. This definitely helped both at work and mentally too.
The one biggest loss for me is her company. As I said before, she was my little shadow so a couple of weeks ago, I decided to see a puppy named Rosie from a dog rescue charity. She was a beautiful pup, and I was super excited to meet her, but upon doing so it just didn't feel right at all. There was something unique about Lady in that when I first met her, she came to me. This little pup was not interested one bit in me and there was no connection.
The foster family who had the dogs were lovely and when I told them about Lady, they also told me about losing their last dog and that it took 3 years to get over the grief. It made me feel a lot less alone and less crazy!!!!!
Ultimately, I realised I was not ready at all for a new four-legged friend in my life yet.
Otherwise, fast-forward four months and I feel mentally much stronger again and work is back on track. I think the person grieving now is my wife as she's spent her time supporting me, so I'm trying to help prop her up by just giving her more background support where I see she's struggling. She's not a talker like me, so I just offer her space, an ear and generally try to make her day-to-day life easier.
It's incredible how much emotion comes out of a close relationship with an animal. Lady was an incredible character, and she will be irreplaceable, but when I'm ready again, I will be adopting another pup to join our family once more. It also sounds masochistic as I know I will most likely outlive the pup and I know how much pain I will then have to endure, but the love you get during its life massively outweighs this.
Anyway. That's where I am now.
I also want to truly thank all of you for your words of support, and my heart goes out to those who mentioned they also recently lost their four-legged friends too.
Time is most definitely a healer. You just have to be patient and sometimes it just takes a lot.....
I still miss Lady daily and there's a huge amount of grief left inside me but things are most definitely better. I read through my original post and it brought a huge amount of sadness and tears to my eyes again. I guess it's all to be expected.
My work suffered too as I felt quite depressed for a while and when I spoke to a HR councillor at work, I felt like I was going barking mad, but he was very understanding, and after a discussion with my boss, I was given a lot of slack and support. This definitely helped both at work and mentally too.
The one biggest loss for me is her company. As I said before, she was my little shadow so a couple of weeks ago, I decided to see a puppy named Rosie from a dog rescue charity. She was a beautiful pup, and I was super excited to meet her, but upon doing so it just didn't feel right at all. There was something unique about Lady in that when I first met her, she came to me. This little pup was not interested one bit in me and there was no connection.
The foster family who had the dogs were lovely and when I told them about Lady, they also told me about losing their last dog and that it took 3 years to get over the grief. It made me feel a lot less alone and less crazy!!!!!
Ultimately, I realised I was not ready at all for a new four-legged friend in my life yet.
Otherwise, fast-forward four months and I feel mentally much stronger again and work is back on track. I think the person grieving now is my wife as she's spent her time supporting me, so I'm trying to help prop her up by just giving her more background support where I see she's struggling. She's not a talker like me, so I just offer her space, an ear and generally try to make her day-to-day life easier.
It's incredible how much emotion comes out of a close relationship with an animal. Lady was an incredible character, and she will be irreplaceable, but when I'm ready again, I will be adopting another pup to join our family once more. It also sounds masochistic as I know I will most likely outlive the pup and I know how much pain I will then have to endure, but the love you get during its life massively outweighs this.
Anyway. That's where I am now.
I also want to truly thank all of you for your words of support, and my heart goes out to those who mentioned they also recently lost their four-legged friends too.
Time is most definitely a healer. You just have to be patient and sometimes it just takes a lot.....
medieval said:
I'm a 53 year old man not known for being emotional but sitting here crying whilst I type this as our little man passed away at 8.45 this morning - a long fight that he had fought very well against cancer but there is only ever one end
We did not think he would last the night as he declined so rapidly but he was there in the morning albeit with so little energy and we had to make that final horrific journey for any dog owner to the vets but by the grace of a God he passed away in the car on the way there.
We will always love him and will be together again I know.
You just can't help loving them so much...
I really am sorry I missed this, and I'm so sorry for your loss. No shame at all in crying and expressing yourself. That was my mental salvation, even though I did look like a train-wreck for a couple of weeks.We did not think he would last the night as he declined so rapidly but he was there in the morning albeit with so little energy and we had to make that final horrific journey for any dog owner to the vets but by the grace of a God he passed away in the car on the way there.
We will always love him and will be together again I know.
You just can't help loving them so much...
Stay strong, look to the future and remember the memories; even if they make you cry from time to time. (I'm sat at work now fighting back the tears after coming back to this thread!!!)
It's all priceless
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