Nelson's Column up for sale...
Discussion
Ed Mark said:
FROM:ED MARK
Dear Sir,
I am representing a small group of people who are interested in overseas investment in your country involving large volume of funds, for which they seek your participation as their overseas representative. These people works in government Organization and are prohibited by code of conduct bureau (civil service law) not to operate an overseas account or business while in civil service.
If you are interested and can handle such a huge fund for investment in overseas, please kindly get back to me as your share/commissions and other things will be discussed.
Waiting,
ED MARK
Dear Sir,
I am representing a small group of people who are interested in overseas investment in your country involving large volume of funds, for which they seek your participation as their overseas representative. These people works in government Organization and are prohibited by code of conduct bureau (civil service law) not to operate an overseas account or business while in civil service.
If you are interested and can handle such a huge fund for investment in overseas, please kindly get back to me as your share/commissions and other things will be discussed.
Waiting,
ED MARK
Mikers said:
Dear Mister Mark,
Your message is most timely. As you must surely know, my country has a
large debt problem. Starting in the New Year, I have been charged with
selling shares in some of our national assets and monuments. I am
specifically seeking overseas investment.
Please respond to me at your earliest convenience with details of how
much capital your clients are looking to invest and what sort of
returns they are looking for (low risk/ medium returns, or higher
risk/ high returns.) From your response, I will suggest some suitable
investments.
One last thing, I have responded from my personal account, as I am not
yet supposed to be opening these national assets for bidding. If your
clients really do have huge sums to invest, then I can ensure that
they have an early chance to purchase shares. There will be a small
premium for this service, in return for which I will arrange a
guaranteed allocation of shares. My country is keen to sell assets, so
I think it is prudent to find a solution that works well for all
involved.
Yours sincerely,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Your message is most timely. As you must surely know, my country has a
large debt problem. Starting in the New Year, I have been charged with
selling shares in some of our national assets and monuments. I am
specifically seeking overseas investment.
Please respond to me at your earliest convenience with details of how
much capital your clients are looking to invest and what sort of
returns they are looking for (low risk/ medium returns, or higher
risk/ high returns.) From your response, I will suggest some suitable
investments.
One last thing, I have responded from my personal account, as I am not
yet supposed to be opening these national assets for bidding. If your
clients really do have huge sums to invest, then I can ensure that
they have an early chance to purchase shares. There will be a small
premium for this service, in return for which I will arrange a
guaranteed allocation of shares. My country is keen to sell assets, so
I think it is prudent to find a solution that works well for all
involved.
Yours sincerely,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Ed Mark said:
Dear sir,
Thanks for your mail.
Do accept my sincere apologies if my mail does not meet your personal
ethics. I sincerely ask for forgiveness for i know this may seem like
a complete intrusion to your privacy but right about now this is my
option of communication.
This note might seem strange or probably untrue considering the amount
of junk mails we receive daily, but i believe this is still the most
genuine way of contacting a true character like you.
Please bear with me for the delay in getting back to you after your
prompt response to my proposal. This is certainly not my way of doing
business, but I was engaged without advance notification in an affair
that took a while to bring to conclusion, hence this late
correspondence.
Anyway, I appreciate the promptness of your response, as it is only
reflective of a disposition that can be rightly termed positive as
well as impressive.
In continuation of my proposal, the people I represent are civil
servants in Sao-Tome Island, and the official regulations in that
country prohibit them from involvement in private business practice,
neither are they allowed to operate overseas bank accounts, hence the
arrangement that shields them in privacy while I deal with you on
their behalf . The proposal I have advanced to you does not involve
any form of illegality, so I would want you to have a fair appraisal
of the solicited engagement, which will bring everyone involved mutual
benefits based on agreed terms.
Just to give you a brief form on introduction, the funds involved is
Fifty Million United States Dollars. The civil servants involved are
all members of the committee in charge of award of construction
contracts in Sao-Tome Island to foreign businesses, and they determine
the financial value of projects based on information presented to the
government. So over time they actually did inflate the real cost of a
particular project. Usually, disbursement of project funds to foreign
based interests are done instalmentally, except when certain
provisions of the project require otherwise. So in this particular
case, the declared cost of the project was US$ 380,000,000:00, while
actual execution cost was US$330,000,000:00. The original company that
handled the project, has been paid off, to the tune of the exact cost
of job executed. So it is the excess, amounting to US$ 50,000,000:00
that we intend to appropriate as our own private business, using you
as the foreign based beneficiary.
It is already officially stated that an overseas based company
delivered consultancy service for the project, and if it is agreed
between you and us that we can engage you for our purpose, you will be
presented as having played the consultancy role, for which the sum of
US$ 50,000,000:00 is due to you. The responsibility for the
preliminary paperwork and related matters will be ours, and it will
take us between 6 to 8 days to accomplish, before final disbursement
of funds to you.
Between my colleagues and I, we have agreed that at the completion of
the exercise, your remuneration will be 30% of the total funds
transferred. I hope this is acceptable to you, as I personally know
this to be a generous offer.
However, prior to initiating the actual procedures, it is important
that we sign a Memorandum of Understanding (M. O. U.) between us,
which will be a document that will regulate our relationship with each
other, particularly after the funds have been transferred into your
custody. The document will acknowledge you as our Funds Manager by
virtue of your maintaining temporary custody of the funds on our
behalf, for investment in your country. The provisions of the M.O.U.
will indicate that it is for your service that 30% of the funds are
coming to you as remuneration. By that arrangement, only 20% of the
total funds shall be subject to local taxes in your country. But
between us, the burden of payment of that tax shall be redistributed
among us in proportion to the percentage pattern of sharing the funds.
I will send you a draft copy of the M.O.U. for your perusal which you
will read through carefully. If the terms are acceptable to you, we
may sign it, and get the project started, as it is something we intend
to complete within a defined time frame, given the nature of the
country in which we live.
In order for us to start,i will like you to send me your information
which will be used to file for the application for the release of the
funds in your favour and also for me to use it to prepare the
agreement which you will sign and also me.
You have to send me the following information as to enable me use it
to secure the approavl of the funds in your name:
1.YOUR FULL NAME /ADDRESS
2.AGE
3.OCCUPATION
4..PASSPORT NO.
5.DIRECT/PRIVATE TELEPHONE NUMBER.
If further questions arise in your mind, I will appreciate that you
relay them to me, so that while we proceed with the transaction, it
shall be based on mutual understanding and effort.
Between my colleagues and I, most of the funds are to be invested in
your country. and we look forward to prospective ideas from you.
Until I hear from you, I send my warm regards to you and your family.
Best Wishes,
ED MARK
Thanks for your mail.
Do accept my sincere apologies if my mail does not meet your personal
ethics. I sincerely ask for forgiveness for i know this may seem like
a complete intrusion to your privacy but right about now this is my
option of communication.
This note might seem strange or probably untrue considering the amount
of junk mails we receive daily, but i believe this is still the most
genuine way of contacting a true character like you.
Please bear with me for the delay in getting back to you after your
prompt response to my proposal. This is certainly not my way of doing
business, but I was engaged without advance notification in an affair
that took a while to bring to conclusion, hence this late
correspondence.
Anyway, I appreciate the promptness of your response, as it is only
reflective of a disposition that can be rightly termed positive as
well as impressive.
In continuation of my proposal, the people I represent are civil
servants in Sao-Tome Island, and the official regulations in that
country prohibit them from involvement in private business practice,
neither are they allowed to operate overseas bank accounts, hence the
arrangement that shields them in privacy while I deal with you on
their behalf . The proposal I have advanced to you does not involve
any form of illegality, so I would want you to have a fair appraisal
of the solicited engagement, which will bring everyone involved mutual
benefits based on agreed terms.
Just to give you a brief form on introduction, the funds involved is
Fifty Million United States Dollars. The civil servants involved are
all members of the committee in charge of award of construction
contracts in Sao-Tome Island to foreign businesses, and they determine
the financial value of projects based on information presented to the
government. So over time they actually did inflate the real cost of a
particular project. Usually, disbursement of project funds to foreign
based interests are done instalmentally, except when certain
provisions of the project require otherwise. So in this particular
case, the declared cost of the project was US$ 380,000,000:00, while
actual execution cost was US$330,000,000:00. The original company that
handled the project, has been paid off, to the tune of the exact cost
of job executed. So it is the excess, amounting to US$ 50,000,000:00
that we intend to appropriate as our own private business, using you
as the foreign based beneficiary.
It is already officially stated that an overseas based company
delivered consultancy service for the project, and if it is agreed
between you and us that we can engage you for our purpose, you will be
presented as having played the consultancy role, for which the sum of
US$ 50,000,000:00 is due to you. The responsibility for the
preliminary paperwork and related matters will be ours, and it will
take us between 6 to 8 days to accomplish, before final disbursement
of funds to you.
Between my colleagues and I, we have agreed that at the completion of
the exercise, your remuneration will be 30% of the total funds
transferred. I hope this is acceptable to you, as I personally know
this to be a generous offer.
However, prior to initiating the actual procedures, it is important
that we sign a Memorandum of Understanding (M. O. U.) between us,
which will be a document that will regulate our relationship with each
other, particularly after the funds have been transferred into your
custody. The document will acknowledge you as our Funds Manager by
virtue of your maintaining temporary custody of the funds on our
behalf, for investment in your country. The provisions of the M.O.U.
will indicate that it is for your service that 30% of the funds are
coming to you as remuneration. By that arrangement, only 20% of the
total funds shall be subject to local taxes in your country. But
between us, the burden of payment of that tax shall be redistributed
among us in proportion to the percentage pattern of sharing the funds.
I will send you a draft copy of the M.O.U. for your perusal which you
will read through carefully. If the terms are acceptable to you, we
may sign it, and get the project started, as it is something we intend
to complete within a defined time frame, given the nature of the
country in which we live.
In order for us to start,i will like you to send me your information
which will be used to file for the application for the release of the
funds in your favour and also for me to use it to prepare the
agreement which you will sign and also me.
You have to send me the following information as to enable me use it
to secure the approavl of the funds in your name:
1.YOUR FULL NAME /ADDRESS
2.AGE
3.OCCUPATION
4..PASSPORT NO.
5.DIRECT/PRIVATE TELEPHONE NUMBER.
If further questions arise in your mind, I will appreciate that you
relay them to me, so that while we proceed with the transaction, it
shall be based on mutual understanding and effort.
Between my colleagues and I, most of the funds are to be invested in
your country. and we look forward to prospective ideas from you.
Until I hear from you, I send my warm regards to you and your family.
Best Wishes,
ED MARK
Mikers said:
Dear Ed,
Thank you for your rapid reply to my email. My ethics are not offended in any way at all.
However, a 30% fee from the 50 million USD that you intend to invest would not leave you enough to invest in the projects I had in mind for you. I am not a greedy man and to be utterly honest with whilst you 15 Million USD sounds very agreeable, it would present me with certain tax and duty problems that I would not be able to easily manage. I had a fee of 7.5% in mind and I am happy to stick to this figure.
This would leave you with 46.25 Million USD for you to invest. I suggest one of the following:
Option 1. 46.25 Million USD would purchase 21% of Balmoral Castle.
http://www.balmoralcastle.com/ It has an annual turn over of 12.3 Million Sterling and assets worth 98 million sterling. The potential for private game parties is currently untapped and the site is not fully marketed. 10% of the monies raised will go into re-landscaping with a view to increasing tourism revenue by 37% year to year.
Saxe-Coburg holdings inc. will retain a 51% stake in this property, but a 21% holding would of course give your clients voting rights.
Option 2. Nelson's Column.
Your investment would purchase 77% of this historic landmark, which is of course the controlling interest
.
I have assurances that the mayors planning office are open to discussions about the future proofing of this site. Various schemes have been discussed, including boxing the structure in and charging for admission on a pay per view basis. The Americans are rumoured to be very interested in this sale, with a mind to disassembling it and shipping it to Arizona. A pre-emptive purchase of the controlling interest would allow your clients to control any future sale and potentially make a fortune in a very short period.
Option 3. The Monument to the great fire.
You could purchase this site and have 6.47 million sterling left over.
Again this site is under utilised. No one remembers the fire! The monument comes with 3 acres of adjacent real estate and planning permission for a fire based theme park.
There are more options available, but as part of my "fee" I consider it my responsibility to find the only the most profitable options for your client.
If there is any other part of the UK that your clients are interested in, please inform me immediately and I will see what I can do.
I think that before we handle the logistics of moving of such a large sum of money, we should agree how it is to be invested. As such, I need your confirmation :
1/ My "fee" of 7.5% is acceptable to you and your clients.
2/ Which of the options I have presented they wish to proceed with (or details of any other proposal which they may like to make).
I do not know how to raise this with you. Dealing with such a large fund through my personal account is irregular, I was going to propose a trust fund. I am not sure fo the legality of this transaction. Can you assure me that no laws will be broken (by me !!) at your end?
Yours sincerely,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Thank you for your rapid reply to my email. My ethics are not offended in any way at all.
However, a 30% fee from the 50 million USD that you intend to invest would not leave you enough to invest in the projects I had in mind for you. I am not a greedy man and to be utterly honest with whilst you 15 Million USD sounds very agreeable, it would present me with certain tax and duty problems that I would not be able to easily manage. I had a fee of 7.5% in mind and I am happy to stick to this figure.
This would leave you with 46.25 Million USD for you to invest. I suggest one of the following:
Option 1. 46.25 Million USD would purchase 21% of Balmoral Castle.
http://www.balmoralcastle.com/ It has an annual turn over of 12.3 Million Sterling and assets worth 98 million sterling. The potential for private game parties is currently untapped and the site is not fully marketed. 10% of the monies raised will go into re-landscaping with a view to increasing tourism revenue by 37% year to year.
Saxe-Coburg holdings inc. will retain a 51% stake in this property, but a 21% holding would of course give your clients voting rights.
Option 2. Nelson's Column.
Your investment would purchase 77% of this historic landmark, which is of course the controlling interest
.I have assurances that the mayors planning office are open to discussions about the future proofing of this site. Various schemes have been discussed, including boxing the structure in and charging for admission on a pay per view basis. The Americans are rumoured to be very interested in this sale, with a mind to disassembling it and shipping it to Arizona. A pre-emptive purchase of the controlling interest would allow your clients to control any future sale and potentially make a fortune in a very short period.
Option 3. The Monument to the great fire.
You could purchase this site and have 6.47 million sterling left over.
Again this site is under utilised. No one remembers the fire! The monument comes with 3 acres of adjacent real estate and planning permission for a fire based theme park.
There are more options available, but as part of my "fee" I consider it my responsibility to find the only the most profitable options for your client.
If there is any other part of the UK that your clients are interested in, please inform me immediately and I will see what I can do.
I think that before we handle the logistics of moving of such a large sum of money, we should agree how it is to be invested. As such, I need your confirmation :
1/ My "fee" of 7.5% is acceptable to you and your clients.
2/ Which of the options I have presented they wish to proceed with (or details of any other proposal which they may like to make).
I do not know how to raise this with you. Dealing with such a large fund through my personal account is irregular, I was going to propose a trust fund. I am not sure fo the legality of this transaction. Can you assure me that no laws will be broken (by me !!) at your end?
Yours sincerely,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
mybrainhurts said:
It's sounds to me as though you're trying to rip off innocents abroad. Shame on you, don't you know they're so skint they run around naked?
Take that back! I'm insulted.And they're not skint, they have 50 million USD to invest.
Never had a live one before. I expect I've over done it already, but I'll keep this thread up to date if I get another response.
Fantastic news... It seems that they have weighed up the three options considered and:
Now, how long should I leave it before I introduce the concept of where to send the first one tonne installment of Pidgeon guano? Any other suggestions as to which direction this should take?
Mark said:
Dear sir,
Thanks for your mail.
Your own fee as you suggested is okay.
I have discussed with my clients and they are okay with option NO.2
and we can proceed with that.
What you will do is to send to me your information so that we can
prepare the MOU and also file it for the approval of the funds in your
name as the recipient.
My assurance is that there is no risk in it.
Waiting,
MARK
Neither Balmoral Castle nor The Momument to the fire of London seem to appeal. They actually want to buy a 77% stake in Nelson's column!Thanks for your mail.
Your own fee as you suggested is okay.
I have discussed with my clients and they are okay with option NO.2
and we can proceed with that.
What you will do is to send to me your information so that we can
prepare the MOU and also file it for the approval of the funds in your
name as the recipient.
My assurance is that there is no risk in it.
Waiting,
MARK
Now, how long should I leave it before I introduce the concept of where to send the first one tonne installment of Pidgeon guano? Any other suggestions as to which direction this should take?
Mikers said:
Hello Ed,
Yes I received your mail. Sorry for the delay in responding, we have had a public holiday here in the UK.
I am working on the details that you requested. My passport has currently expired. Can you accept some other form of ID?
I am opening a new account specifically for this transaction. I will pass you the account details when it is up and ready. This is likely to take one week.
I am 62 and my business address is National Monuments Office, The Treasury, 14 Downing Street, London SW1. England.
In the mean time I have prepared a document detailing the terms and conditions of our sale of Nelson's Column to you. It's in Open Doc format. Let me know if you need pdf. I do hope you're not a Mac user. Are you able to sign it, scan and return it to me please? If not, simply respond by email accepting the terms - please ensure you include the attachment to you mail, so we have proof of your acceptance.
Don't worry about most of the document. Most of it is legal stuff that we have to do. I don't understand it all, but the legal guys insist. You will be interested in section 3. It details exactly what you are buying.
Best regards, and Happy New Year,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
The full T's and C's are here:Yes I received your mail. Sorry for the delay in responding, we have had a public holiday here in the UK.
I am working on the details that you requested. My passport has currently expired. Can you accept some other form of ID?
I am opening a new account specifically for this transaction. I will pass you the account details when it is up and ready. This is likely to take one week.
I am 62 and my business address is National Monuments Office, The Treasury, 14 Downing Street, London SW1. England.
In the mean time I have prepared a document detailing the terms and conditions of our sale of Nelson's Column to you. It's in Open Doc format. Let me know if you need pdf. I do hope you're not a Mac user. Are you able to sign it, scan and return it to me please? If not, simply respond by email accepting the terms - please ensure you include the attachment to you mail, so we have proof of your acceptance.
Don't worry about most of the document. Most of it is legal stuff that we have to do. I don't understand it all, but the legal guys insist. You will be interested in section 3. It details exactly what you are buying.
Best regards, and Happy New Year,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/u1swdzaklacdun2/NelsonsC...
But for those who CBA, here are some excerpts:
T's and C's said:
“We” are the National Momuments Office.
“You”, Ed Mark are a representative of a group of Civil Servants from Sao Tome, seeking to embezzle $50 Million USD (approx 20% Sao Tome’s GDP).
....
....
....
1.3 If Nelson’s Column is out of stock You will be advised within 48 working hours of Us receiving Your order. You will be offered an alternative product if one is available or You may cancel Your order.
....
....
....
3 Ownership of the Goods
3.1 You will purchase a 77% share in Nelsons Column for the sum of $46.25 Million USD.
3.2 You will own the portion of Nelsons Column, from Nelson’s hat, to just above this todger, then from his left knee downwards to 37 feet above ground level.
3.3 Ownership of the Nelson’s Column delivered or to be delivered by Us will only be transferred to You when We have received cash or cleared funds in full payment of all sums owing to Us in respect of the Nelson’s Column and in respect of any other agreements between You or Us.
3.4 Until payment is made as aforesaid You must store the Nelson’s Column in such a way that it is clearly Our property.
....
....
....
4.3 You must supply an address for us to deliver items cleaned off or collected from Nelson’s Column. This is to include litter, guano and Big Issue sellers. We will ship these items to You at Your expense. You will be liable for these items from the point at which we receive your acceptance of these Terms and Conditions.
....
....
....
4.5 If You believe that there are shortages in the number of Nelson’s Columns contained in the packages or if any damage has occurred to the Nelson’s Column in transit, You must report these to Us within two working days of receipt of the Nelson’s Column and this must be confirmed in writing and any damaged Nelson’s Column returned to Us, within 14 days of delivery.
....
....
....
5.9 We will not accept any returns of Nelson’s Column unless you can show that the Nelson’s Column We provided to You was materially faulty at the time of sale.
Ain't the internet wonderful? These T's & C's were pinched from a dental website and tweaked.“You”, Ed Mark are a representative of a group of Civil Servants from Sao Tome, seeking to embezzle $50 Million USD (approx 20% Sao Tome’s GDP).
....
....
....
1.3 If Nelson’s Column is out of stock You will be advised within 48 working hours of Us receiving Your order. You will be offered an alternative product if one is available or You may cancel Your order.
....
....
....
3 Ownership of the Goods
3.1 You will purchase a 77% share in Nelsons Column for the sum of $46.25 Million USD.
3.2 You will own the portion of Nelsons Column, from Nelson’s hat, to just above this todger, then from his left knee downwards to 37 feet above ground level.
3.3 Ownership of the Nelson’s Column delivered or to be delivered by Us will only be transferred to You when We have received cash or cleared funds in full payment of all sums owing to Us in respect of the Nelson’s Column and in respect of any other agreements between You or Us.
3.4 Until payment is made as aforesaid You must store the Nelson’s Column in such a way that it is clearly Our property.
....
....
....
4.3 You must supply an address for us to deliver items cleaned off or collected from Nelson’s Column. This is to include litter, guano and Big Issue sellers. We will ship these items to You at Your expense. You will be liable for these items from the point at which we receive your acceptance of these Terms and Conditions.
....
....
....
4.5 If You believe that there are shortages in the number of Nelson’s Columns contained in the packages or if any damage has occurred to the Nelson’s Column in transit, You must report these to Us within two working days of receipt of the Nelson’s Column and this must be confirmed in writing and any damaged Nelson’s Column returned to Us, within 14 days of delivery.
....
....
....
5.9 We will not accept any returns of Nelson’s Column unless you can show that the Nelson’s Column We provided to You was materially faulty at the time of sale.
To keep the mods happy, I've tucked my next response behind a spoiler. Time to turn up the ridiculuous a little. You may consider this NSFW, then again, you may not.
Mikeveal said:
Dear Mr. Mark,
Please find attached a pdf copy of the terms and conditions. If you could sign, scan and return, or send an email expressing your agreement (with a copy of the terms and conditions attached) we can proceed.
What details do you still require from me to send me your Memorandum of Understanding?
You've asked for my telephone number. That will be a little difficult at the moment. Obviously I can not take your call at work yet. If my political masters realised we'd agreed a sale before they've announced that they're looking for bidders, I would be in trouble and it would jepardoise our agreement. I work long hours here in the city and my land lady does not like me taking calls at my lodgings late in the evening (I never get home early).
I do not own a mobile telephone. I think I must be the last person in the world!
I would give you the number of my country retreat. However, I feel it will not be of much use to you this weekend. I am going on a hairy clam hunt. I know I shouldn't bring our personal lives into this arrangement, but I don't want you to feel I'm not committed to our deal. I'm also excited, my big gun will be out for sure this weekend. There's nothing quite like cornering a hairy clam and unloading both barrels into it when you see the whites of it's eyes. I do not know much about Sao Tome. Do you hunt hairy clam over there?
Please forgive me for being personal. Is it Okay to chat whilst we arrange this deal? I believe that is should be possible to be friendly as well as professional.
Kind regards,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Please find attached a pdf copy of the terms and conditions. If you could sign, scan and return, or send an email expressing your agreement (with a copy of the terms and conditions attached) we can proceed.
What details do you still require from me to send me your Memorandum of Understanding?
You've asked for my telephone number. That will be a little difficult at the moment. Obviously I can not take your call at work yet. If my political masters realised we'd agreed a sale before they've announced that they're looking for bidders, I would be in trouble and it would jepardoise our agreement. I work long hours here in the city and my land lady does not like me taking calls at my lodgings late in the evening (I never get home early).
I do not own a mobile telephone. I think I must be the last person in the world!
I would give you the number of my country retreat. However, I feel it will not be of much use to you this weekend. I am going on a hairy clam hunt. I know I shouldn't bring our personal lives into this arrangement, but I don't want you to feel I'm not committed to our deal. I'm also excited, my big gun will be out for sure this weekend. There's nothing quite like cornering a hairy clam and unloading both barrels into it when you see the whites of it's eyes. I do not know much about Sao Tome. Do you hunt hairy clam over there?
Please forgive me for being personal. Is it Okay to chat whilst we arrange this deal? I believe that is should be possible to be friendly as well as professional.
Kind regards,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Edited by mikeveal on Friday 4th January 12:17
Oh dear, he doesn't like the contract.
Ed Mark said:
Dear sir,
Thanks for your mail.
I deanded for your passport or dribers license and you never send it
up till now.
Secondly,i want a telephone number where i can speak with you as we
need to talk.
Thirdly,the test of the agreement,i do not like it because no name of
yours and other things.
It has to be drawn perfectly and not telling me that my colleagues
want to embezzle money.
I want your identity and the telephone number.
Waiting,
MARK
And absolutely no mention of whether or not he hunts hairy clam.Thanks for your mail.
I deanded for your passport or dribers license and you never send it
up till now.
Secondly,i want a telephone number where i can speak with you as we
need to talk.
Thirdly,the test of the agreement,i do not like it because no name of
yours and other things.
It has to be drawn perfectly and not telling me that my colleagues
want to embezzle money.
I want your identity and the telephone number.
Waiting,
MARK
Reply now sent.
Any other ideas?
MikeVeal said:
Dear Ed,
I do not understand. I thought we were working hard to create a good deal.
I have no problem sending you my passport number. I keep my passport at my country retreat, not at my London lodgings. I will return there on the weekend of the 19th / 20th January, so can provide you with my passport number on Monday 21st. I assume that this is not a problem for you. We're talking about a 50 million dollar investment here, I deal with this kind of money all the time and I do not believe that this timescale is unusal.
I have explained why I can not talk to you over the telephone. I can call you from my country home when I am there on the 19th. I don't understand why you need to speak. What do you need to say over the telephone that you can not say by email? Let me have your phone number.
Please send me a list of things that you do not like about the terms and conditions. I will talk to our legal team about changing them. I see what you mean about the embezzeling bit, it doesn't read well. One of my colleagues in the legal department prepared this document for me based on what you've told me about where the funds came from. Would you prefer 'misappropriated', or can you suggest some alternative wording?
My name is not on the terms and condtions as I do not own Nelson's Column. It belongs to my employer, the National Monuments Office. They are mentioned many times. Your contract will be with them, I am merely brokering the sale.
The tone of your email worries me. I am keen to proceed with this sale and will provide you with everything you need. But this is a two way process. There are things I need for my end too. You must provide me with these. If your colleagues are having second thoughts and would rather invest in some thing else, please let me know.
I am worried that my talk of hunting hairy clam has offended you. My sincerest appologies if that is the case. I understand that some men are not interested in hairy clam, are you one of these?
Please let me know that you are still interested. I will send you my account details. I was also going to arrange some free flights to the UK, so that you and your colleagues could view Nelson's Column and officially take ownership. Will four tickets be enough?
Best regards,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
There's a motive behind offering the free flights. I've a vauge idea forming about getting him to agree to meet with a minor royal and present them with a gift, perhaps a tea towel holder and some starfish lube...I do not understand. I thought we were working hard to create a good deal.
I have no problem sending you my passport number. I keep my passport at my country retreat, not at my London lodgings. I will return there on the weekend of the 19th / 20th January, so can provide you with my passport number on Monday 21st. I assume that this is not a problem for you. We're talking about a 50 million dollar investment here, I deal with this kind of money all the time and I do not believe that this timescale is unusal.
I have explained why I can not talk to you over the telephone. I can call you from my country home when I am there on the 19th. I don't understand why you need to speak. What do you need to say over the telephone that you can not say by email? Let me have your phone number.
Please send me a list of things that you do not like about the terms and conditions. I will talk to our legal team about changing them. I see what you mean about the embezzeling bit, it doesn't read well. One of my colleagues in the legal department prepared this document for me based on what you've told me about where the funds came from. Would you prefer 'misappropriated', or can you suggest some alternative wording?
My name is not on the terms and condtions as I do not own Nelson's Column. It belongs to my employer, the National Monuments Office. They are mentioned many times. Your contract will be with them, I am merely brokering the sale.
The tone of your email worries me. I am keen to proceed with this sale and will provide you with everything you need. But this is a two way process. There are things I need for my end too. You must provide me with these. If your colleagues are having second thoughts and would rather invest in some thing else, please let me know.
I am worried that my talk of hunting hairy clam has offended you. My sincerest appologies if that is the case. I understand that some men are not interested in hairy clam, are you one of these?
Please let me know that you are still interested. I will send you my account details. I was also going to arrange some free flights to the UK, so that you and your colleagues could view Nelson's Column and officially take ownership. Will four tickets be enough?
Best regards,
M Veal ACC
Assistant Clerk
National Monument Office,
The Treasury.
Any other ideas?
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